Nah, having a consistent bedtime isn’t bad, you do what you feel is right for your family.
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As a parent we need that quiet time after they go to bed . It’s also time for you and your husband.
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You’re the parent It’s your choice on what works best for you and your family. Personally My kids stay on their bedtime routine regardless if it’s summer or not. 
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My kids are 7.5 and 10.5 and have bedtimes in the summer. Unless there is a reason like not being home or company is over they are in their beds between 8/830 reading or on iPads. Then at 9pm they go bed. I’d like to make it earlier so I can relax but my husband says the same thing as yours. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with sticking to a bedtime in the summer because once school starts it’ll be harder to get them to bed earlier if they are up until late. I’d let your 14 year old stay up later then your other 2 kids though since she is 14.
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Thank fuck you ain’t my mum
My kids go to bed at like 11 or 12 but they go up to their room at 9. They have a tv and they play their switch
Maybe during the week extend the time out a little bit and offer a a chance for the kids to have a later night on a weekend.
Make it fun…watch a movie as a family and offer popcorn and maybe a fun sweet treat. It changes up the mundane and gives them something to look forward to.
Or if your kids get a long…give them a chance to stay up the three of them to watch a movie and you and the hubby can have some time to relax while they are enjoying themselves.
Mine stay on sleep schedule for the summer bc if they don’t they will be overly emotional and nothing but attitude over even the most minor things! Though 8:30 is our quiet time as we have a preschool age little one but my 9 year old has a later sleep time she has to be in her bed chilled out watching something by no later than 9:30. Sometimes staying on schedule is the only normal thing to a child as being out of school means no guaranteed structured schedule and some kids find that overwhelming
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I have an 11 year old and a 9 year old…my 9 year old is wicked when she doesn’t get the appropriate amount of sleep but will also peel her eyes open til 4am if I let her. So they BOTH still adhere to a bedtime but it’s about 30 minutes to an hour later than school time…and about 2-3 times a month we will bend the rules for a family.movie night or an all day family outting. I however do believe the bedtimes should be age appropriate…my 11 year old is aloud up about an hour past my 9 year old. So I definitely think its unfair for your 14 year old to have a bedtime of 830 especially during the summer.
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Our kids still have a bedtime, unless we’re doing something special. It’s the time my husband and I relax together. We still have lots of fun all day, but they still have their bedtime. It also makes the transition to the school year so much easier.
For the age groups you metioned there should be different bed times and curfews. They don’t need as much sleep and they don’t have school in the summer
Yeahhhhh I’d be pretty mad if my mom put me to bed at 8:30 at 14. From 8-11 was mine and my mom’s alone time. She would get my niece and nephew to bed ( completely unrelated topic) And then we would sit on the couch and watch TV together or watch movies and eat snacks until 10:30 or 11:00.
My kids don’t have a bedtime necessarily… but I make them go to their rooms and lights out by like 10:30
Nope! At those ages bedtimes were long gone lol they usually passed out on their own before 11-12 anyway and would sleep until 8 or 9 which was awesome! (On a side note … my guys are grown and I miss those summers so much!! It goes by fast … make sure you are living in the moment!! Pick your battles, bedtime shouldnt be one of them lol)
Ummm your husband is right. I always have have kids back on a schedule a week before school starts back up. If anything try extending it 1 hours. Give them a little more time
Way too strict and selfish!
I’d kms if I was 14 and my mom was making me go to bed at 8:30 looool how embarrassing 
it’s almost like you forget what it’s like to be that age. Even 8:30 for a 9 year old is outrageous, my 2 and 3 year old go to bed at that time.
Kids were in bed by 9 during school, and still go to bed at 9. I get some quiet time and work doesn’t stop during the summer. Hubby is up at 4am and I am shortly after depending on what shift I work that day. My kids are usually crabby around 8:30. They are 13, 10, 6, 4 and 22m.
I think 8:30 for the 14 year old is a bit far fetched for sure and I’d at least let the other two stay up until 9 or 9:30 during the summer just start having them get back in the normal bedtime routine the week before school starts
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We throw out bedtimes in the summer. But we have about 4 wks left so this weekend we’re gonna start working them back into schedule. There’s just something about staying up crazy hours or the night in the summer as a kid that they’ll remember forever! I remember my summers growing up and staying up late!
When my kids were much younger they had a strict bedtime. Now they are 9 and 6 and they go to bed anywhere between 8:30 and 10 during summer. I will say it depends on the kid and their behavior the following day. Sometimes my 6 year old is cranky the next day if he didn’t get enough sleep.
Yeah, it’s a bit much especially for that 14 and 11 y/o!!!
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My son can literally stay up and sleep in till whenever he wants during the summer. He’s 12, Who cares 
lol when he was young he had a bedtime but he’s basically a teenager now lol The last week before school though he goes to bed at 9:30 to adjust the week before school starts!
Yes. Usually it’s 830 but in summer it’s typically 930 ish. They’re 10, 7 & 3.
Yup 8:30 bedtime 365 days a year 
Idc what season, holiday, wknd it is. Of course they get a little extension here & there & during sport seasons its unavoidable but yea bedtime is the same all year 
Work doesn’t stop in the summer. So my kids still go to their room at 9p. Not necessarily to sleep but they go to their rooms. Weekends they can stay up as late as they want. But weeknights we still follow somewhat of a schedule. But my kids also love sleeping and if they don’t get a good sleep they are miserable the next day. Once in a while they will ask to stay up later to watch a movie or something. Mine are 12 and 7 But to call a mom selfish for wanting a little time to unwind is absurd. When a mom is tired or running herself into the ground every one says she needs a break but when she takes said break she gets attacked for it. Mom needs alone time and bedtime is the easiest time to get it. There’s no need to call this woman names or put her down for her choices. Some of you people are so mean to strangers on the internet. It’s sad.
During the summer I would let mine stay up until about a week or two before school started back then go back to regular week schedule…
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When I was under 10 I had a bedtime but, they would let me stay up a little longer. Let the stay up a bit later. We as mothers don’t always get quiet time.
My oldest 2 are 15 and 17. As long as they are quiet and respect the areas of the house that are shared space they can stay up. When school is back they either adjust or get their tech taken away if they don’t wake up on time for school. They’re responsible enough that this works. My youngest is 9 and his bedtime is 10 during the summer unless he has karate camp the next day then it’s 9. Hubby fought me on a 9 o’clock bedtime so this was the compromise. He learned the hard way that letting him stay up any later put his schedule out of whack and he struggled getting him up in the morning for camp. He has the same technology rule now but he also loses it if he fights us on going to bed on time. That rule sticks even during the school year because there have been too many mornings hubby was late because he wasn’t getting up on time for him to drop him off at camp. If he gets to be too noisy after 8 pm we tell him to take it to his room.
You are being too strict. For mine summer didn’t matter though we did movie nights a lot. We did say something if it was like 11 and they weren’t lights out yet.
It’s summer and yeah I think you’re being a bit strict if you expect your children to go to bed at 8:30 it’s not even dark at 8:30 you said 8,11 and 14 ?the 14-year-old should have a different bedtime than everybody else being the oldest and 8:30 ain’t it. They are 8 11 and 14 not toddlers so allowing them to stay up later cause it’s summer shouldn’t affect your “quiet time” that much they don’t need constant supervision or entertainment from you at that age cause they are not babies/toddlers. This is how we use to do it in my house in the Summer’s with our kids &niece’s&newphews etc.>>teenagers were allowed to stay up till midnight(13&up) ,(13 to 8) till 10pm. And the littles (under 6) normal bedtimes as always.
My oldest (12) was still awake at 5am when my husband left for work this morning. All because she wanted Waffle House. My youngest (10) needs more sleep than the oldest but loves the idea of staying up. Honestly, the readjusting to school schedule isn’t bad.
Yes I keep a tight schedule no matter the season. It helps my kids stay on track. Plus it teaches responsibility for working ethics later on in life
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It’s summer. I let my 14 year old put herself to bed by 11:30. It was hard for me to do that bcuz I like my quiet time too. I go to bed at 10:30 and she texts me at 11:30 telling me good night.
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My kids Don t even have a bed time during school time lol. However they do have a “go to ur room and be quiet” time. It works for us.
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I think 8:30 for that old is ridiculous even during the school year. And if the only reason you can come up with is selfish reasoning of not wanting to be around your children then yeah, I agree with your husband. Why can’t you be the one with a bed time and go to your own private space in your bedroom to be alone?
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Find a happy medium. If the reason they are going to bed is because nice mommy leaves the house after 9pm. Then maybe let them have a few extra late nights and keep routine Monday- Wednesday so that mom gets the recharge time she needs.
Personally I think 8:30 is too early even for school for those ages. My 5 year Olds bedtime is in between 8-8:30 and my 12 year old in between 9:45-10:15 depending on the day they had. During the summer I let them stay up later even though it drives me crazy.
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Only if you enjoy your little people, so sorry if you don’t. Let them play to exhaustion 
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Relax , as long as they are good and give you space. I let mine stay up during summer .
My 8 year old went to bed last night around 4 in the morning it’s summer when school starts he goes to bed at 9
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I agree with your spouse on this one.
I understand where your coming from as for wanting some peace at the end of the day.
However, summer is not very long and you can always get them back into normal routines a week or so before school is due to resume.
I also doubt that there getting sleep when the sun would still be up at that hour.
Especially you’re 14-year-olds should be allowed to stay up a little later and the Sun is still up that’s probably why they don’t want to go to sleep yet he’s also do okay you don’t have to go to sleep but you got to go to your room and be quiet or do some activities in your room
I tried to be “fun” this summer with my 7 year old and let her stay up late. But she started sleep walking to back to being in bed by 8! If we deviate for 2 nights in a row she’s sleep walking again 
Yes they should keep the same routine makes it easier all the way around.jmo though
Yes later, but yes younger kids
That’s too early were you ever a kid could you imagion going to bed at 830 when you were 14 that is ridiculous
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My kid’s don’t have a bed time on the weekends or school vacations. They did when they were between the ages of 5 and 8, because they definitely needed more sleep. Their bed time was 9. They’re now 14 &10 and are more self sufficient. They pretty much hang out in their rooms, watch tv, play games and talk on the phone. About 2 weeks before school starts, we start getting back into a routine.
Also, just because your kids are awake, doesn’t mean you can’t have alone time. They’re at the age where they should be more self sufficient. Just tell them you need some me time, so unless it’s an emergency, give you some space. I usually just watch tv in my room.
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You make your 11 and 14 year old go to bed at 8:30?
Just no……
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Yes my 9 year old goes to bed at 9 she don’t last
After raising 5 kids … Absolutely - it can be later than the school year and a little more relaxed on weekends but the structure is still needed.
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It will be easier when school starts again or let them stay up then once there is like a month left till school starts then put the time back to help them get ready to wake early. I don’t have a schedule yet but once school starts I will.
Yes you have a set bedtime maybe a hour later
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8:30 for a 14 year old?? You are wayyy off Momma!!!
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My kids dont have a bed time during the summer. Anytime they dont have school they dont have a bedtime.
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School is about to start again there’s no point in changing it now. The 14yr old should have a later bedtime then the younger ones though. Even if it is just by 30 minutes.
I would like to know how in the world you get a 11 year old and a 14 year old to obey enough to go to bed by 8:30 every night!!! Can we trade kids for a short period of time?!?! I will pay you to whip my kids into shape like this (not literally whip) 
I am totally just kidding. My kids have way too much energy to be sleeping before the sun even goes down and I would never want to place such strict expectations on them.
I can’t remember the last time my two older kids went to bed by 8:30 willingly because it’s been so long 
But their school also doesn’t start until 9:00 in the morning and we live right next to it.
Usually by 14, kids start becoming mean and rebelling. You got lucky! I would count your lucky stars and ease up a bit before your severe strict parenting Pushes your children to act out… especially behind your back. Parents who are too strict often have children that sneak around. 
I like quiet time too, but your older children should be able to entertain themselves while staying in their rooms and still be relatively quiet even if their bedtime is at a later time.
8:30 for a 14 year old?! 
hell yes you are being too strict!!
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I allow a little bit of a time change, but they know once it’s Aug 1st and they only have weeks left before school… bedtimes are back in order and no longer allowed to sleep past 9am during the week. 9/13 years olds.
You deserve ME time and keep the bedtime year round. Kids need sleep when they are growing. If they stay up later it gets later and later! 12 yr old in my daughters household is up til 1, 2, 3 in the morning when he visits his dad. Then goes back to mom and has a bedtime after dinner probably 8:00 or soon after. He is up so late at my daughters he goes around in a brain fog all day!
Will waste the day sleeping instead of be outside in the fresh air, enjoying summer!
8:30?! 
That’s just crazy! You are definitely way too strict!
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8:30 is way to early I would give them until at least 10 or 11. The 14 year old should be able to go-to bed when ever or at least mid night.
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My 11yr olds bed time is 8pm during school I let her stay up til 11 during the summer but she will be back on the school schedule next week so she is ready when she goes back… Don’t let anyone tell you you’re being too strict with your kids… These days parents need to be all up and thru their kids business❣️
He is give em a break.
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my kids had a room time that they had to be in their rooms and calm but not a bedtime. during that time they could read, draw, write or play quietly but couldnt leave their room. then bedtimes were age reliant.
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It’s not even dark at 8:30 during the summer. Personally I think that’s even too early for the 14 year old when school is in session. We all need our alone time but if you can’t get alone time every day during the summer I think you’ll still be OK, if it’s really an issue for you go in your room and have your me time and just let everybody know not to bother you
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Loosen the reigns a bit man. Geez
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Let them stay up during the summer. Also, you need to adjust the bedtime for the 14 year old.
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There’s a compromise 9:00 p.m. bedtime
I think it depends on the kid and the age. Some kids crave and need consistency and some can handle being allowed to stay up late until school starts. It was always a struggle in my house. As summer went on, the kids stayed up later and later. and slept later and later. Before I k we it they were getting up for dinner lol.
wow that sounds TERRIBLE
ewwww haha. let them up holy moley
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Mom is right my kids bed time never change summer or fall stayed the same
It’s not even dark yet at 8:30.
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8.30 for a 14yr old - get ready for a full on rebellion ,possibly sneaking out etc
It’s their summer holidays from working hard at school ,I would definitely let them stay up longer, I do with my own and the closer to the end of the summer hols ease the routine back 
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No i let my son stay up 
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My kids dont even go to bed at 8:30 on school nights lol. Get ready for bed at 8:30 9pm bedtime lights out. 7, 10, 11yrs…
During school breaks they sleep anywhere from 10pm-12am and wakeup from 8am-10am. But definitely back into the school routine a week b4 schools back.
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Us kids during summer and weekends didn’t have a bed time. We did have to be respectful and earn the trust of staying up on our own but we didn’t have a bedtime unless we had to be somewhere in the morning
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My three have a later bed time then that. And my oldest is only 6 1/2.
My oldest and middle go to their rooms at 9:30, they can either play for half an hour or go to bed right away, but usually in bed by 10- for the most part, unless dinner is super later. My youngest goes to sleep between 9-9:30. During the school year bed time is between 8:30-9 for all three.
We have “quiet time” in our house. So just institute an “after 8:30, it’s quiet time/ bedroom time” rule and it’s a win win. Kids don’t have to go to sleep but the house is calm and quiet
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At 8:30 it’s still light outside!! LOL
I’m with your husband! That’s ridiculous for a 14 year old…especially in the summer! We have 4…we weren’t even home from sports until 8:30-9…
Their bedtime was always 10…no matter their age!
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Maybe compromise by having certain days they can stay up later, like over the weekend or having bed be 10, but they need to be ready for bed and in their rooms by 9 and can have an hour of quiet time.
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Every family is different but I am surprised your 14 year old has not rebelled yet. 8:30 is quite early for that age. My kids did have early bedtimes until middle school then we had to adjust based on their homework and after school activities. Summertime we added an hour unless they had something planned. By high school it was 11:00 pm lights out, except on weekends. They had sports, homework, and a social life. If they were tired, they self regulated.
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Yes!
But not 8:30pm that too early
How bout 10-11:30pm but they have to be in their room or not so loud in living room. If you had a patio with a fenced in yard they could be outside too.
What I don’t like is that parenting continues until midnight and it’s extremely exhausting to do that every single night. They can stay up but entertainment is on their own.
Let them stay up later
That’s too early for summer
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Nope! Summer is a free for all. We start to get back into the swing two weeks before school starts.
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Nope cause they are only kids once. Enjoy the summer!
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I grew up with set bedtimes - 7 for babies, 7:30 for 2-4, 8 for 6-12, 9 for the rest of us winter and summer. We had chores to do all summer and into the fall until it was too cold to put lines out. I put my kids to bed at the same times and they were all up with the chickens! On Fri/Sat nights I let my kids watch tv shows and news and, if they were still awake they could watch the late movie. Most times they were asleep before the late movie ended. After they were teenagers they did manage to watch the late movie and weren’t so easy to get up in the mornings. I didn’t have any issues about bed times or kids crying half the night because they didn’t want to go to bed either. I never had to rock my kids to sleep unless they were really sick or overly tired.
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My younger kids (8 year old twins) have a weekday bedtime and a weekend bedtime. Weekday is 8:00 and weekend is 9, so in the summer they get their weekend bedtime until the week before school starts. Then we start their school schedule again. My 15 year old is a whole different ball game. He chooses his bedtime but he only gets to sleep until 9am no matter what.
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It’s not about who’s right or wrong 
it’s about what you 2 agree on … for an example let them stay up till 9:30… it’s not to late but it still gives them the feeling of staying up later … also maybe different bed times …
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I’d let them stay up but locked outside and see how they like staying up late. Lol every family is different after a certain age it ok in the summer and off to bed in the school months at 8:30.
My daughter is 11 and unless we have something going on the next day, she doesn’t have a set bedtime. She has to be in bed early and up early for school all year so I don’t make her go to bed in the summer.
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