When do you leave and when do you get the courage?
I have been with my daughters father off and on for 4 ish years since 2017 we have broken up quite a bit due to his behavior and supposedly mine as well (i take full responsibility for anything wrong ive done) this last time was the longest we had been apart i had been the one to call it quits due to him putting his friends first and leaving us at the bottom of his priority pole. Soon as my daughter was born i have done everything as if i was a single mom except i was being controlled and not allowed to do anything like work, shower, even take my meds which could end my life if i didn’t take them. He has made us get kicked out from two apartments even with family members of mine helping to prevent but he cant keep a job to save his life, he will spend hundreds if not thousands along with all his time and effort on his friends(or as he calls them family) he has never treated me good and this last year he had gotten physical shoving me or putting me in a choke hold…im scared to leave him he said he would never let me leave whether i got a restraining order or not the thing with it his friends have all agreed to help him come after me and make it so im dead or will take my 2 year old from me so i never see her again so im stuck…they know where we live along with family members (my parents, siblings, uncles etc) who have also beem threatened to be hurt by him. He has me so scared to be alone but every smart cell in my body is saying to run but im afraid of what will happen. He has held a knife to his throat threatening to cut if i didnt admit i was wrong and that im a b*tch ill never be nothing but one, he has punched and beat on our cars he also has punched the couch while our two year old was on it when she was 13 months at the time absolutely scaring her to death (thats when i broke up with him) im just so lost its either break up and risk him coming after us or stay and risk never being able to be free from him causing trauma to our daughter. I just need support and thoughts on what to do because we arent happy nor safe with him around.