If her kids are safe from her actions. It’s sad but for your own healths sake you may have to disassociate yourself and just support the kids x
Report it so the kids stay safe.
At least
This go around she has to battle those demons herself. You’re trying to save her and that’s understandable and I’m sure you’ve told her time and time how you’ve felt. This time won’t make a difference either. With or without you she’s going to do what she wants.
Give her to GOD! Come to grips with the worse that can happen and take care of yourself and be there for you niece(s) or nephew(s). You’ve done your best I’m sure and sometimes we have to love ppl from afar.
You can’t do anything only she can.
Distance yourself but be that loving sister still.
I understand how hard it is on your sister. I’ve been there. Its hard. But only her and her alone can break the chains and be free.
Y’all … Do you know what abusive relationships do to your mind? They eat away at you chunk by chunk. Literally will break you down into nothing then build you back into someone you don’t recognize. Part of you knows how bad it is, but then you doubt it because you have been tortured into believing you are crazy and not to be trusted to know anything. The abusers are mental terrorists. You can’t even trust yourself to know the sky is blue. If you do manage to find a part yourself again and leave, you get love bombed by the abuser again. They really are good at making all the things seem like they changed. But really they just figured out a new tactic.
I know it is hard to watch But your family member will never walk away when they have been told you won’t be there for them. You saying that reinforces everything their abuser told them. That No One can love them. They need to know that when they truly are ready you will be there. And it may take 7 times or 10 times of leaving…these are building blocks back to who they used to be. They have to disengage slowly. Doing it abruptly can trigger ptsd episodes.
It’s her life and her choice, you have done your part but she didn’t listen, whatever happen to her is not your fault and you cannot blame yourself for that. We were given free will by God to choose between good and evil and she has chosen evil so there’s nothing you can do about it. Just wait for the outcome of her actions and hope for the best.
I would beat the hell out of the guy and drag him to my basement. He won’t be missed
This really hit’s home with me ) went through the same exact thing with my Sister ) Story is too long ) l have helped her soo many times over all these 35 yrs. f this ! They always Back too the toxic relationship ! Save yourself a lot of Heart Break an move on with your Life …
You screenshot your post and have it copied. On the top of the paper write, “what would you do if this was one of your daughters?” and put into an envelope. Keep it in your purse then invite her for coffee or lunch without him. Have a nice visit with your sister and spend quality time with her and talk much about her little girls that need mommy and anything to lift her spirits. When the visit is over and you’ve done your hugs goodbye, hand her the envelope and ask her to open it when she is alone…
If she went through all of this with this man, and is willing to take him back. She needs psychiatric help
Call and write dr phil
you can plant the seeds of realization by verbalizing to her what you observe and hopefully your words will revisit her thoughts. unfortunately there is no way to get anyone to realize these things. by continuing to be there for her, being supportive and perhaps speaking ideas or phrases that she can call her own when she allows herself to realize her circumstances for what they really are you may actually save her life.
The only thing to do now is protect her kids. If she is to brainwashed to see the devastating path she is taking then all you can do is protect the kids. Even if that means taking them away from her. Because if he can treat her that way it would be nothing for him to do the kids the same way or worse. Pray for her and love her regardless. You may have to initiate tough love. Meaning cutting her off from the family and live her from a distance.
You need to inform child services that she’s back together with this man, she shouldn’t be allowed anywhere near her girls while she’s with him. She needs to realise that she can’t have him and them, she needs to either make her safety and that of her girls her main priority or she can continue to be used and abused but her girls and you won’t be around to see it a second time. Tell her that as much as you love her you can’t watch this all happen again. When the time comes that she finally sees sense and decides to get rid of him she can call you and you will help but up till that point she’s on her own. She can’t expect you to drag yourself back into this shit just because she is.
Mind your own business…shes grown and making her own decisions. Im sure shes aware its toxic but untill shes ready to admit it you will only end up the bad guy
See if you can have her involuntarily committed
I agree with Michelle, if someone calls the police And tells what he is doing to her. They can take him to jail then if u Get a decent judge—perhaps they will do something.