*Trigger warning* My ex abused me and I can't escape him:Advice?

If they are his friends, then they are not your friends!! You need to sever the ties to him. It may suck but seriousely, they are not good enough to be in your life.

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Yes I have been through what you have described and his own sister begged me to leave him and when I did she thought I was the worst thing in the universe and you know why that was okay because I am living my best life now!

If you have a life that is a happy and fulfilling move to a town or two away form your ex and live a happy life.

Sweetheart if you have to cut everyone off but your husband then so be it, itā€™s healthier for YOU that way. Healing takes time and if they support him, which it seems they do, then you donā€™t need them in your life anyway. Be strong for yourself, think of life without the chaos and drama. You deserve better than what they are giving you.

I have been through this my family still consider him family

Can you be get a restraining order against him do you have proof of the abuse go talk to the police and ask for advice against this man go see a lawyer to get a deceit and quit talking about you and your family if youā€™re friends are your friends they will stick with you if not make new friends you have put up with to much abuse and it needs to stop and perhaps a lawyer can advise you what can be done about this abusing spouse

Iā€™d stop talking to all of themā€¦ I have I only have my fiance now n his family

Those people are not your friends. You need to find new friends. You obviously have been given an opportunity to have a new life, leave the old one behind and start fresh!

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I have been though with my ex but I didnā€™t have much friends because of my ex so I finally left him two years ago with my kids an never looked back an I am happier an my kids are too. I only thing is my youngest is heā€™s kid but he canā€™t see me so I know in the long run it will hurt my youngest for not seeing her dad but she is safe an healthy with me

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Good for you on getting away from him! I would go with cut everybody off that still talks to him, every one of them!

Baby girl, if they prefer him over you LET THEM GO!! Not all family is blood and it will be hard and you will want to give in for THEM but stand your ground. They made their choice. Now you need to make yours. Remove all of them from social media and make sure your accounts are private so NO ONE can friend request you not even him.
You got away honey. YOU ARE A FIGHTER AND SURVIVER!!! Dont let him, them or anyone else take that from you!! :wink::wink::wink:

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I agree with dumbing those back stabbers and getting a restraining order. If he violates it. He goes to jail. He should be in jail for attempted murder. After restraining order you see him you call law. Every single time. If you got to carry a gun and learn how to use it.

Your family and you will get all the emotional support you need, and please talk about it to whoever will listen that is part of the healing process

I got abused by someone when I didnā€™t have any fam around as is. I finally got away and came out on top. Cut your fam off they clearly give no fucks why should you. My abuser passed away this past April. 2 of my kids were by him. He wanted nothing of them. And now he is dead. And I still am having PTSD symptoms from shit. Got away from him for good in 2011

I have been there my ex had no friends tho my friends where the only ones he had so I didnā€™t have that problem if they had I would have cut them from my life because it isnā€™t worth have they so I would cut them if they saw it they know and donā€™t care so kick them to curve find other friends you husband is your best friend anyway

I would delete everyone who r still friends with him they arenā€™t ur friends. The only and best friend you have is ur husband. Make new friends who donā€™t know him

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Yep u need to get rid of everyone who is his friend or u will never have peace

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Why isnā€™t he in prison

Itā€™s so common to see this in DV due to abusers are master manipulators, most being narcissistic, I know there are some studyā€™s being down about this very thing. I had to give up everyone involved including family and all I can say is I mourned and missed them for a bit then I had new family come along there not blood but they are loving me in every way a family is supposed to itā€™s funny cause people really think were blood. Itā€™s okay to turn your back on family when they choose toxicity over you. Itā€™s hard at first but it gets easier also you can come to turns with your pain i suffered many many years of PTSD and I could not find a method to help until I left everyone alone and did not enter my life I began to heal. Why because I was no longer triggered. Iā€™m 54 now I wish I knew back then what I know now 38 years of abuse I was badly broken. Today Iā€™m a warrior. I started collage when I was 52 to become a DV therapist. You can come back from domestic violence youā€™ll never be who you were before it but you are amazing to survive.

Friends like that you donā€™t need any enemies but then again we are only hearing one side of the story ijs

I just want to add something itā€™s not positive by any means but for other woman out there please do not put your safety in thinking a restraining order alone is going to protect you. You must be diligent about your safety. Reach out to shelters, groups anyone who will listen and if they start to judge you DO NOT ACCEPT THEM IN YOUR LIFE NO MATTER HOW HARD IT IS. Also for you that are thinking Iā€™ve all ready tried to leave and I just went back to him or her I deserve this and I know many feel this way too just remember thatā€™s your abuser talking in your head. It take an average 17 trys for victims to finally escape for good I know that might sound disheartening to many but remember thatā€™s an average it took me 7 times to leave and the way I scaped was for about two weeks before I took the most precious things and hid them to get easy access and i planned for a long time i meet 3 woman from a church i started going to because no one knew my abusers three woman there helped me i will never forget them anyways i moved clear across the street one day i was taking my kids to school and we vanished i did not tell anyone i knew we found a shelter that took entire familyā€™s and we started our lives over, i fear the next time someone hits me because i very well could hurt them bad Iā€™ve realized it is never your fault to be kicked, pushed,hit, burned ,threat with my life nor my childrenā€™s, being raped humiliated ashamed and everything else was not my fault it was not okay I didnā€™t deserve it. Just be safe.

File a restraining order and when he violates it shoot his ass.

You have to let them go. They arenā€™t for you both family and friends alike. Youā€™ll have to learn to enjoy your husband, step children, and your own company. They are toxic and are showing you that they condone his behavior towards you and perhaps feel that you some how bought it on yourself. May I ask if you have a restraining order against him ? If not you need to get one. Your ex sounds like a hateful narcissist (mental disorder- NPD). Read up on it, itā€™ll help you get through it. It gets easier and youā€™ll find peace with it. Believe me.
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