The only thing you should be doing is laying down the law that in your house it is absolutely not allowed. Whether or not the dad allows it is not up to you. And your daughter should be reiterating to her child that he should absolutely not speak like that at grandma’s
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oooooof… I mean… you overstepped but I understand. I hate when kids swear. Its not cute or funny.
I think I would’ve just told your daughter to talk to him or you will, not go behind her back.
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Not your place at all. Kids learn more bad words at School every day then a weekend at a parents house.
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You’re over stepping. You’re the grandparent, not the parent. If your daughter wants to say something she will. It’s one thing to tell the child not to say it or to tell your own daughter something, but not your place to contact the father.
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I curse like a sailor that mated with a trucker!
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Why ask after the fact? Guilty conscience? Yes, as a grandmother of 4, that was not your place. Period!
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Not your business. Learn boundaries.
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In a way its kinda wrong cause of that mother/daughter relationship and having boundaries but at the same time you are the day care provider. A daycare provider should inform both parents of what’s going on with their child.
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You overstepped your boundaries. I would stop talking to ya too. So I do not blame your daughter.
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First off this hurt my brain to read… And secondly… you were wrong in getting involved, it isn’t your place. While I am not justifying the fact that the little one throws out fbombs… just remember kids at that age hear something and repeat it. And sometimes we as adults we tend to forget this… He will eventually learn a new word and soon forget the fword. And us as parents need our parents to remember that these are our kids to raise and that we will handle situations as we see fit, got to know when to pick and choose our battles.
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You are definitely in the wrong and nobody in your family is going to tell you that because they are your family 
if you did not give birth to that kid, you do not have a say. The mother probably said she “kept forgetting” so you would stop asking her about it. Parents nowadays usually don’t care if their children cuss, as long as they know the time and places when to. Cuss words are literally just words. And just like all the words, there is a time and a place to say certain things. 
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You need now friends because a real friend wouldn’t lie to you and tell you that what you did was right. Your dead wrong. I’m guessing you learned this toxic behavior from your mom if she told you you were right. You quit your job because you wanted to so don’t act like your daughter begged you too. If your daughter didn’t tell her ex then she’s not worried about it because it’s not that big of a deal that your making it out to be.
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Lady you need to butt out. You crossed the line.
You over stepped. Your daughter may have choose not to address it for reasons only she knows. Maybe he is verbally abusive idk but we pick and choose our battles for a reason you could have stirred the pot without realizing it between them
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Completely inappropriate. You aren’t the parent. Stay in your lane.
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While I see your heart was in the right place, I would of mentioned it to the daughter ans let it be.
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Just ignore the behaviour they will stop if you make a deal they will keep doing it
Mind your business, let parents parent.
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Yes and I only read the first sentence
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Are you his mom? No. Learn your place. You raised your kids, now let them raise theirs whether they are together or split.
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Yes you were wrong. That’s not your place to speak on. You tell your daughter and she needs to handle it.
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because you do a SELFLESS act does not mean you shove it in her face, everything you do, sounds very controlling.
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The best way to deal with a toddler swearing is to ignore it. With that being said, yes, you over stepped. If she said she’ll take care of it, you have to let her in her own time. But if it’s just the kid saying a curse word, it’s best everyone just ignore that and not give it your attention bc that’s when the kid notices that that’s how to get attention. Kids want attention, positive or negative.
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Yes you were wrong. Not your place, even if the intent was right.
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Your role is grandma. You bring it to your daughter and let her deal with it.
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Not. Your. Business.
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Nope not at all. I deal with all my grandchildren’s mother on my own. I have to have a personal relationship with them for the better of the children. I consider them as part of my family whether my son is with them or not. He doesn’t like it but It is what it is.
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Mind your own business!
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Wow yes u are wrong definitely not your place
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I literally cannot with these posts anymore. The Internet seriously kills brain cells
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Sorry but you need to mind your own business. Its your daughter’s responsibility to address this with the father.
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What the actual fuck.
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Good intentions, but not your place luv.
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Your grandchildren will always be your business, your own children will always be your business, but you’re not responsible for any other person outside of that immediate connection to be able to over step like that. Your daughters reaction, “I keep forgetting” is an indication that she’s uncomfortable having that discussion with you an in her own time will probably pull up the father. The only thing you have control of, is inside of your home, control that an let what you cannot, go. Teach him that in your house/his mum’s house, that, that language is inappropriate an shouldn’t be used. It’s inappropriate for you to get in-between your daughters business like that. I don’t blame you for wanting too but that’s not your area, as his grandmother an daughters mother, to get involved in. If you’ve voiced the concern to your daughter, then you’ve done your part. Yes, the father has a right to know that he is possibly responsible altogether for the profanity but it’s not your responsibility to go over your daughters head an have that discussion, it’s hers alone. It’s swearing, not the end of the world. He’ll learn as ya’ll teach, that it isn’t ok. What happens at his house, is his problem & when your daughter feels comfortable enough to have a discussion with her ex, then she will. I don’t think you were wrong, I simply think you should have left it up to your daughter, as that is her responsibility as his mum, not nanny’s responsibility. My parents would never. Simply out of respect for the dynamic myself an partner have created for our little family. If something is said, done that they don’t like, they leave me too it, respectfully & rightfully so.
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Totally not your place. My mom called my son’s father a deadbeat when he was at my house for his supervised visit, recently (which, he is one) and I got SO upset with her and told her she had absolutely no right and that those things are between me and his dad and I will (and do) say what needs to be said to him, my own self. She admitted she was wrong and totally overstepped my boundaries and promised to never do it again and said she just hates it so much how little he is there for my son and it makes her so mad (which I get because it disgusts me, too), but that she had no right saying it. Sounds like you need to back off and let your daughter handle her own child’s business. It is not your place whatsoever. You can dislike it, but you have no right saying it to him.
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Yeah you way overstepped grandma.
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It seems everyone on here is overlooking the child’s best interest. It’s a bad reflection on both parents. Other parents who don’t like swearing won’t let their children play with him and it will get worse. When he’s in school he’ll be disciplined for “potty mouth” and he’ll not understand why. I think she did the right thing. The child is the victim here.
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You may well babysit but that boy is your grandson…not your child.
You ask your daughter what she wants you to do when her son swears and you follow her lead. Its definitely not your place to contact her ex partner no matter how much you feel like it
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Toddlers repeat everything. You should not have texted him. That was absolutely inappropriate and something the parents should handle. Not you.
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You’re causing more problems
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It really wasn’t your place to do it.But I honestly don’t blame you bc it sounds to me like ur daughter just didn’t want to tell him if u reminded her to several times.
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I absolutely don’t think you did anything wrong. That’s your grandchild. Not sure what parent would be upset that you tried to correct a behavior that could get them in trouble later on. A daycare or school would address it so if anything they should be thanking you.
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No you weren’t but now days these young people think there’s nothing wrong with it
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You’re wrong for this. Grandparents need to stay in their lane unless there’s actual abuse going on.
If the language bothers you while you’re babysitting correct the language by letting him know those words are adult words. You don’t reach out to the ex though, that’s taking it too far imo
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Babysitting for free doesn’t buy you the right to impose yourself or insert yourself and your personal feelings where they don’t belong. Idk, that would totally be violating my boundaries and piss me off, if your daughter didn’t tell you it was ok then your wrong. It’s not your place and it’s just out of line.
Children should not use the “F” word. They should be taught words of kindness.
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I’ve had to tell 2 of my grandkids a few times that I don’t use that type of language in my home and would like them to stop using dirty words in my house. They picked it up from others around them and in both their parents homes.
The big problem is that these words are the normal language of so many these days, naturally kids are going to repeat them. Just remember to teach them that you don’t like it. Do not punish the child while they are so young, they honestly don’t know it’s bad.
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You’re causing more problems. Parenting when split is hard as it is, you just pick your battles, sounds like you’re causing battles instead. If I was your daughter I’d be furious
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As a mom I can see where you see as your job to protect your baby and even more special, her baby, but I think from here on out you should leave that communication up to her 
tell her you’re sorry for over stepping boundaries and that you’re still learning too.
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It used to be “It takes a village to raise a child” but today people would rather be offended and pissed then everyone work together to raise a decent human being 
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You did nothing wrong your daughter is suffering after affects from his abuse she needs therapy
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A child repeats what they hear you should have done said something because it doesn’t sound like your daughter is going to
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I would have did exactly as you do.
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You’re def out of line and I would be peeved at your overstepping!!
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Just tell him thats a bad word and carry on
…I am with my grands daily and let both parents know whats what…but if one is an ex they can figure it out and I will think will what I think! Its a matter of picking the battles…it should be address and the mother also has the responsibility of addressing things…she should of spoke up long ago but consider why hes the ex could be why she choose not too! Petty for her to stop communication…
You’re not wrong at all. Ignore everyone who says otherwise.
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Absolutely. Huge overstep and significant lack of awareness.
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Yes you are wrong. Assuming all the blessings come from your side and all the negative MUST come from the other side of the family is VERY toxic. Then you have the audacity to harass the father of your grandchild?! Badly done.
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Stay out of her business
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Not your freaking PLACE. YOU RAISED YOUR KIDS THE WAY YOU WANTED. LET YOUR DAUGHTER HANDLE HER OWN BUSINESS🤬. YOU ARE OVER STEPPING YOUR BOUNDARIES
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That boy is your grandson, not your son. Know your place and let your daughter and ex coparent their child as they see fit.
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If all the grandparents are pitching in , isn’t that helping raise the child ?? Address the issue with child ! Punish him based on rules you set and have for while you watch them. Not attached to certain homes etc. I’m sorry but we don’t talk like that , that’s a bad word. No snacks, cookies, pool time , whatever …on your time ! Punish and speak to child on your time. You can talk to your daughter but she’s in the same situation , fighting her ex for his poor language around child. Make a point to address it with child , set boundaries, rules etc. We don’t speak like that , if I hear bad words then no…whatever , just make sure to address wrong Behavoir when it happens . Don’t call his dad or try to get Mom to take sides. When your with Grammy and Pop, you don’t talk that way, we have important rules. Lay down rules , punish when needed , praise good Behavoir. You don’t have to be the bad guy , nobody is setting a good example, set one .
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Let you’re daughter handle it,not you’re place
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So what you’re saying is you dont trust you’re adult daughter to things on her own? Weird
Support her but dont step in and fight her battles
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It can be used in court against your daughter. Butt out before you unknowingly cost her HER child
I think you were out of line. Your ex son-in-law is ex for a reason. You saying something to him is just going to cause more problems between the mom and him. Now he’s going to bitch at her that her mom can’t keep her nose in her own business. I would have been pissed if my mom would do that. It is overstepping.
Non of this is your business. Your job is to love your grandchild, be there for your daughter WHEN ASKED OR GIVEN PERMISSION, and spoil and love your family because now your role has changed. You’re still a mom, but in a different way. You need to back off and let your daughter make these decisions whether or not you agree. You can tell her how you feel, but you can not control this. You need to let her be a mom.
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You did nothing wrong, if yr daughter won’t speak to him, then you had every right to do so
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Watching your grandchildren does NOT give you the right to “parent” them. Nor does it provide you the ability to betray your daughter to call her ex. Just correct the child’s behavior when they say the word.
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Um. Yes. You are. That is 100% NOT your place. You are grandma, not mom, not dad. You should stay in your lane.
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Not your child, none of your business.
You did nothing wrong
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You babysitting for free does not give you the right. You are wrong. Period!
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Not your child. Let his mom deal with it
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No you didn’t do anything wrong! If she don’t wanna address it then you were in the right to!!
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If he uses the words correctly what is the fuckin issue?
You were very correct in telling your daughter and it’s up to her to do something about it!!
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Mind your business…… if she wanted something said she could have said it, the fact that she kept “ forgetting” meant she didn’t want to say anything for whatever reason or she may have actually said something in private etc to him and they handled it…that’s your grandson not your son … know your place… quitting ur job etc doesn’t give you the right to overstep what she wants and your friends etc are prob saying ur right because they already know how you are or because they’re your friends etc and don’t want to go against you, hurt your feelings, or tell you that you were wrong….
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Grandparents always try to overstep their roll, just be a good grandma not the kids parent.
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I don’t think you are wrong. Why should you have to walk on eggshells? You have the same common intrest,your beautiful grandchild.
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I don’t see the problem here. I’m guessing that there’s a lot of friction between the child’s parents and that’s the real issue.
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Kids say what they hear, this is unfortunate for this toddler
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Yes HORRIBLY in the wrong.
While you assisting in this child’s raising you are not one of the parents.
I would be severely upset if my mother did this to me.
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If he is coming to your house saying it, and your daughter isn’t doing anything to fix it, no u should be able to address it with him, if they expect the kid to come to your house then it shouldn’t be a issue for you to let them BOTH know about negative behavior. I go to my sons dads mom about bad behaviors before I even do his dad because she keeps him just as much, she may not be mom or dad, but she’s a big part of his life, so she needs to be kept in the loop and I know her son isn’t going to let her know
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Not your place! You can let the child’s mom (your daughter) know and SHE will handle it as she sees fit. This seems like it should be common sense. Stay in your lane. I just can’t, literally can’t… and you quitting your job yo babysit for free??? What are we supposed to PAY grandparent’s to watch their grandchildren???
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Yes you were wrong, what the ex does at his house is none of your business. And just because you all babysit the child does not mean you out rank mom in anything…maybe she didnt want to start unnecessary drama. Stay in your lane grandma.
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Sounds like this little boy has a lot a love. Since your daughter could not be bothered to tell her ex and since you r babysitting… probably spending more hours with him than anyone else…yes you have the right to let h know.
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I say you over stepped
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I don’t think you did anything wrong at all. I think we just have a lot of ridiculous parents that overreact waaaaay too much!!!
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Not your place . You over stepped.
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Without knowing what you said and how you phrased it, it’s hard to say if you’re wrong or not but going off what you’re telling…
If you babysit the child so often that you had to quit your job to do so, I’m going to say it’s your place to stop bad behavior and you started with your daughter who didn’t care enough for whatever reason to even remember to address your concern with her ex. A day care teacher and I won’t lie probably even my own mamma would’ve done the same thing if i didn’t correct my childs behavior during her free childcare.
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Over stepped. You informed your daughter; it’s her job to discuss with her ex
yes, u must stay out of her business!!!
If you were my mother, I’d tell you to stay in your lane. 
So every time your grandson does something you don’t agree w/ you will reach out to him (Ex Son In Law) ??? 
Just enjoy being a Grandma & if “babysitting “ is to much, discontinue that !
Trust your daughter’s judgement /Parent Style *you raised her !!!
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You are 100% wrong. Not your place at all. You definitely overstepped.
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Yeah it is not your place to step in. I would be upset with my mother for overstepping also.
That is between your grandchild’s parents. You over stepped.
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I’d say you are overbearing and pushy…definately not your place!
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Way over stepped. Your daughter needs to be the one to step up