It’s not your place. Regardless of if you babysit or not. You can tell him he can’t use those words in your presence or your home but that’s not your place
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Just talk with the child and tell them it is a bad word even gor adults but adults do say bad words but they should not repeat them. You cannot help what an adult does you can only deal with the child and let them know of that it is a no no and bad.
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I do the same as you . You got this
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Not your kid not your place. Teach him in your home
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Wrong I understand your concern, but that was your daughter’s call not yours
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I don’t see a problem with you texting him 
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I mean I get it, but it wasn’t your place to contact him. Stay in your lane.
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If that’s your grand child u have all the right. I would ,
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But she should of handled it,(your daughter)
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Sorry but that’s not your kid. You overstepped.
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Seriously, kids will pick words up. Swearing included, best you can do is let the child know they shouldn’t use them and the consequences those words can have…
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If I’m babysitting I would be bringing any concerning behavior to both parents attention. And if it was my daughter then I would tell her I can’t be babysitting if I’m not allowed to bring anything up
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Sadly it’s not your call
Your daughter and her ex have to sort it out
Its not your place to reach out to your grand child’s father
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I don’t call it babysitting wen it comes to having time with my grandchildren. I call it making memories and sharing special moments with them. As a grandmother and a great grandmother their is nothing more precious. I flew home from Australia several years ago to help raise my great grand daughter, and wen I overstepped the mark coz I thought I knew better her other had no problem pulling me back into line. Your job as the grandmother is to love and nurture them. Let the parents deal with all that other stuff coz I strongly believe that children react more to situations e.g the f… bomb. Wen adults overreact.
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Not your kid. Yea you were wrong.
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Yeah, you overstepped. Everyone parents differently and at the end of the day, this is your daughter’s child, not yours. She probably doesn’t “forget” to talk to her ex, she probably just doesn’t care. Teaching him not to say that at your house is within appropriate boundaries. Going behind your daughter’s back to talk to her ex when you aren’t getting what you want from her is inappropriate and manipulative.
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Your the grandparent not the parent… you don’t get to tell your daughter how to parent her own child just because you don’t like what the child is doing not your place! She’s a adult leave her alone, your treating her as a child still and you wonder why she gets so annoyed with you!
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It’s just a word for gods sake manage it. yes you overstepped and you absolutely should not have done that. You need a serious reality check.
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Well I’d you weren’t providing free child care this would be a huge issue at a daycare. Mom needs to step up and actually be a parent since she seems to be leaving the raising of said child to everyone else. I don’t care who’s kid it is. If my daughter was acting like a fool someone better say something to me or her father. Just because they aren’t together anymore doesn’t mean everyone involved shouldn’t be doing right by the child. Or does she only want you to be there and help when it’s convenient…
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It’s not your business. It’s up to your daughter to speak to her ex regarding concerns with their child… if and when she chooses, not you.
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Respectfully, it wasn’t your place. You’re not his direct parent.
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As a grandma, who watches 3 grand blessings, I get where you are coming from. I would want to do the same thing. BUT……. I wouldn’t. It’s not your place, but your daughter’s! Jump on her for “forgetting” to mention it. Tell her call or text him so she doesn’t forget! Honestly idk why she would hesitate to say something immediately! As far as your grand blessing, keep reinforcing good behaviors! Simply tell him that’s not a nice word to say, or we don’t talk like that! Don’t tell him he’s bad. And if he says daddy does, just say daddy is an adult and sometimes, they talk like that, but little boys never do! Good luck Grandma! 
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Even though the child has to stop using the word before they are enrolled in school or daycare it is the parents decision. Making them aware it is happening at your house an you will be correcting when you are watching them is ok. There may be a reason she isn’t fond of talking to the ex. (Not saying its abuse there are dozens of reasons) it could just start an argument she isnt caring to have ect. She may just see nothing wrong with it. That is her choice an if there are consequences for whatever reason they are hers to deal with. You have to let her live her life an make her own decisions. She will learn the best way for her to raise her child. If the child isnt being abused or neglected you don’t intervene.
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yOU ARE CORRECT, MY FRIEND
In my opinion you were wrong. She is the mother she needs to bring it up to her ex. And if she forgets keep reminding her to.
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As a mother with the same issue with my toddler. I have spoken to his father myself, I get ignored or told a lie. My grandma (who also watches my son for free as we live with her) tells him and he listens. So quite frankly, I dont see the issue.
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This is the tricky part when parents look after their grandchildren. They feel entitled to parent any situation. If you don’t like something your Grandson does, discuss it witth YOUR daughter. That is where it ends. It really was over stepping by contacting the dad. Sorry Granny, I know you love him but you need to stay in your lane. 
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You tell your daughter, and let her handle things with the ex. Don’t put yourself in the middle of their parenting.
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Wow! So not your place! Babysitting your grandchild for free does not suddenly give you parental rights to the kiddo, and also doesn’t sound very free if you’re butting in where you shouldn’t.
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Better be CAREFUL what you say in front of your KIDS !!!
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While baby sitting encourage the use of good words instead.
Teach the child these are bad words. It is easily done.
No need to blame others, make it clear to the child that this use of language in your home is not acceptable and explain why.
My son who is 4 now has only said words like this a handful of times. Usually repeating what others have said I made it quite clear that speaking like that is not okay is disrespectful and bad and also said Santa doesn’t like those words.
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Oh my goodness… you’re not one of those nosey mothers right… ummmm yes but you are 
. Yes you definitely overstepped your boundaries. First of all, what was it your trying to accomplish? You have no right to tell that kids father how to talk or how to act in his own home. You can try to teach your grandson what is allowed and not allowed in your home, no one else’s. Maybe your daughter has a decent relationship with her ex which she is trying to keep that way and she certainly doesn’t need you stirring the pot. He’s a little kid that is a sponge. As far as repeating things, especially if he knows it is a bad word, he will say it even more if you make a big deal out of it. He’s going to hear and repeat stuff until he is old enough to understand he will get in trouble if he does. Of course you can wrap him in bubble wrap to protect him from the outside world I guess 
. Ignore him and once he isn’t getting a reaction he’ll stop. Also, what does babysitting for “free” have to do with it (you were sure to emphasize free) because that certainly doesn’t give you the right to go behind your daughters back. Leave the discussions between the parents, not your place, and stick to babysitting. My mom would never go behind my back for anything…she may nag me out but she’d never betray me and I’d never do that to my daughter either 
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I take issue with some of these comments, grandmother, as an adult, should be able to say what she wants to the child’s father that she’s babysitting. All she is doing is teaching the child some morals! I would question the parents that take issue with it. She is good enough for them to trust her to babysit for free so why not trust her teaching of anything else?
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You are that child’s grandmother. Not mother. No one has permission to be intrusive of what I allow or don’t allow unless there’s some type of abuse happening. So I agree with your daughter being upset with you. Teach the toddler that those are daddy words and not “whatever the child’s name is” words and they are not allowed to use them, either at all, or at your house or whatever. Yes their minds are sponges and they repeat. But just like they learn what no means, they will learn they can’t use or say everything either. Also don’t use your choices to do things “for free” as leverage to butt in and parent for your adult child and grandchild. From the sound of it, you should’ve exercised your parental intrusiveness while she was with the father of this child.
Yes, you were wrong. It’s not your place. Your goal to raise that toddler is out of line and a disrespectful mindset.
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Not your place and it doesn’t matter that you now babysit for free…that is entirely your choice.
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Your over stepping. It’s not your place to parent her child.
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Your a grandparent…your grandson says something like that there is a reason. The child didn’t get it from the internet. Your in the right …ex or not
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Not your kid, not your business! Stay out of your daughter’s personal life!
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Im sorry but that kid would have soap in that potty mouth, that is so wrong and so disrespectful for letting him act like that, its not funny either
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Well a daycare would inform the parents or a school. If grandma is trusted to babysit what’s the big deal? It didn’t sound like a blame game, just making sure dad knew to. Idk, I’m old school this stuff just seems petty. If a child is using foul language an adult should step up…and let the parents know. Now what the parents do with that info is on them. My question is why wouldn’t mom talk to dad about it? Morals and values. True you can’t control how people speak in their homes. But they both should be aware
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you didn’t state it’s always, only that it so happen to be for 3 days and he came home saying the f word. Mistakes happen and if he doesn’t have his son often I mean cmon kind of messed up to shame some one when you don’t know the rest of the story. What if he stubbed his toe or something happened? The F word came out. At least it wasn’t something else. It could have happened to anyone.
Try not to control the way your daughter is raising her boy. By all means he is a boy, you may teach him those rules in your home no cussing bad words etc etc.
Until it’s affecting your grandchild’s wellbeing and happiness dont sabotage your position in their lives so early on.
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It takes a whole village to raise a child.
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If something didn’t seem right at a daycare or school, they would speak to the parents. She has an important role in the child’s life. She’s not over stepping. The father should watch his mouth in front of his kid. Then the child is saying it anywhere he’s at. People can’t parent their own kids then other people will have to say something.
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I get it that it’s up to the parents to raise and discipline the child but what happened to communication? Everyone is on here beating up grandma for giving a hoot for saying something. That is her grand child she might not be mom but still has an opinion as to how to raise her grandson. Obviously the daughter could care less. So if that’s the case have her take little man to day care and when he starts popping off at the mouth w foul language then let mommy and daddy that know everything stand up to the consequences of his behavior because the father can’t control his mouth. I had that problem w my son and guess what the day care came down on me hard because my son picked up foul words from his dead beat dad. Now I’m not saying this one is but language like that is not necessary around a child. If I was grandma you bet your butt I’d say something if she won’t take care of it …then yeah I would! Rant over!
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Sounds like we’re getting grandma’s “can do no wrong” side of the story. Obviously the mother was aware of the situation. You’re obviously just looking for the public to justify your intrusive behavior. Mind your business. Let’s all be thankful that this is not our MIL.
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You watch the kid and he’s his parent…you have the right to say something about it to him. Them splitting didn’t make your daughter the only parent or authority figure in that child’s life
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She’s the grandmother & his ex mother inlaw. IF the daughter is afraid to make waves for the best interest of her child OR “ keeps forgetting “ to mention it THEN yeah BEFORE it escalates & schools calling, then the police & before ya know it, its collect from juvy
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Nah you had the right to politely bring it to his attention, so he is at least aware and can help correct the behavior.
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It’s only the word fuck
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Not your place its the mother’s to speak to the dad about it, lovely thing to offer to look after baby while they work but to give up your job wow 
Take a step back your the grandparent it’s not your place to over take x
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Just wondering if you think maybe the mom keeps “forgetting “ because she knows it’s not coming from the dads house?
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Sounds as though you’re daughter has enough going on already without having to worry about your behaviour as well.
You’ve over-stepped the mark, your daughter is an adult now and while she remains your daughter she’s no longer your child.
In addition, you’re essentially saying by such actions that you want this grandchild raised according to your personal values, morals and the culture of your generation.
Let the child’s parents decide what is right or wrong for them.
And saying you quit your job to babysit for free? Are you doing that for what purpose? So you can throw it in their face as emotional manipulation? Because that is not free, that’s a very high cost for them to endure. If that’s not the case and you’re doing it purely for the love of the child then why even say it?
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Side note isn’t necessary.
And if you give him the reaction when he drops it, he will keep on saying it
Sasha is right …my darling granddaughter who is almost three …ran around for three days saying what the f…k but when I gave her no reaction she stopped .
You did nothing wrong. You are clearly a big player in this child’s life and it’s not like u and your ex son in law are in bad books. It takes a village after all. And the only way it can work is everyone can communicate
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I don’t think you did anything wrong
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Foul language has become so common these days, it’s almost the new norm. I don’t believe you can shelter this child from hearing cuss words. I would probably just try to teach the child not to use cuss words. I cuss when I’m angry, but I try to be conscientious around children.
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It’s between the parents that are raising the child etc you are creating an issue over something really minor, just simply remind the child that they are adults words that he can use when he is an adult but not before and move on
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I understand your desire to protect your grandson but the responsibility is on your daughter and you need to step back. And yes I’m a grandma
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what happened to “it takes a village” this woman is clearly part of this child’s village so her communication should be valued!
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Myself I do not think it was wrong of you. In this day and age people just let that word fly. I don’t understand why it’s used like every other word , but it is and in front of children. All I can say is when he visits with you don’t let him use it around you. Let him know it’s disresceptful. And to not use it in your house.
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No, I wouldn’t say you were wrong at all. Kiddos are going to hear swear words. We teach kiddos that there are words that adults say that kiddos shouldn’t.
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I don’t think you did anything wrong but at the same time it’s your grandson which means your daughter is his mom so if she doesn’t want you messaging her ex then it’s wrong. If she doesn’t care then it’s not🤷🏻♀️
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Sorry you did over step. You should always have your daughters back. If she doesn’t want to bring up curse words to her ex then you can’t either. She might have a good reason for not bringing it up. She doesn’t have to let you know her reason. What went on in her marriage is her business. She can say what ever she want about her ex but you did not live in her house hold. My Grandma always said. Filth is in the mind of the beholder. That is why babies are so sweet. They don’t know what is bad or good. We as adults put that in their minds.
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As a custodial mother to my step child I would be livid if any one in the family took matters in their own hands with her mother. It’s okay to give advice to your daughter about what you think she should do, but ultimately at the end of the day it’s her battle to fight. You are meddling in an area you don’t belong.
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All the people on here who are so quick to say you were wrong are also the first to cry and have a tantrum when your mom backs off from “helping” you. She is a huggeeee part of that childs life you have allowed her to take over the roll of what is best for said child. If she has brought it to your attention and you still ignore you cant get mad if she trys to fix/correct the problem. Sure hindsight is always 2020 but as parents there are no rulebooks no instructions we wing shit every day are we always right nope but do we always try to do whats right yep. I think that we as parents do what we can we always want whats best and for that sometimes we dont always do whats wanted but we do what we think is needed. Also It does take a village. Children are hard especially now a days they are way more stubborn tend to not listen especially if not everyone is on the same page. Im sorry but if one parent is clueless then how can we coparent? Now that you have brought it to his attention where it goes from there is out of your control. You have done your part just try to continue to raise that child.
Get it out in the open and be a proactive adult here…Clearly one parent and possibly both parents need to strive at cleaning up the vulgar trash vocabulary around this toddler who is simply mimicking the adults within ear shot…Jeez people…grow up and park the gutter talk…problem solved…do not turn this into a soap opera about who should or shouldn’t be the adult here…
Stay in your lane grandma.
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Stay in your lane. People who swear btw are more intelligent and creative it’s a measurable metric.
You need to apologize for over stepping to your daughter first.
Then you’re ex son in law.
And then you need to evaluate how else you may be alienating your daughter and undermining her.
You were abusive.
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The F word is used to replace words uneducated people use it all the time Think about it it could fit for every word if you didn’t have the correct grammar. I think it’s great you brought it to their attention. years ago it was brought to my attention and it made me find other words to replace. I actually found myself communicating alot better. So yes when you aren’t mad bring it to his attention. And if he doesn’t hear you that’s too bad
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I guess it would depend on the relationship you had with your son in law before, but personally, I would let the child know that those words are not acceptable in your presence. You cannot control what happens at his place, but children are intelligent enough to understand this.,
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Omg he must be so thankful your the EX mil!!! 
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Absolutely yes you are in the wrong!! He is her child, not yours
You do not get to decide how to parent this child.
It may be possible that they are not addressing it because they are doing what many parents do and that is to ignore the bad words and not make a big deal out of them so that they don’t seem so fun to repeat. This is exactly what we have done for our children, and they do not use the words now. This is possibly parenting plan sabotage.
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Stay. In. Your. Lane.
I don’t think letting him know what has been happening is a big issue…more important things going on than worrying about giving heads up to the parent. if your daughter doesn’t approve then don’t do it again…but I would say “you deal with it or I will”…or maybe she does not find this a big deal!
He may have heard the word some places else
I’d have left it to my daughter to deal with. Loving the toddler is wonderful. Raising him, on the other hand, is the primary job of the parents. Quitting your job to babysit is laudable and no doubt much appreciated, but it does not automatically give you the right to interfere with the parenting of the child. Making suggestions and offering advice to your daughter is fine; but don’t expect all of them to be implemented how or when you feel they should be.
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Teach him it’s not ok to say those words when he’s in your presence. His mum and dad might allow it and that’s up to them
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yes you’re wrong. learn to back off you’re not coparenting with them.
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How is she wrong? Her grandchild dropped the F BOMB! Like y’all’s thinking is so backwards. We should be questioning why her daughter doesn’t care the child is using the F word enough to keep ‘forgetting’.
You said what you had to say, move on!
As tough as it is … no.
Talk to the boy about it, not his dad. Let him know there are certain words that are not allowed in your home -
Don’t make a big deal about it or shame his dad -
Yes. You can text it, write it, pen pal it, whatever, as long as you delete it and don’t send it. You can set up boundaries at your house and consequence for using inappropriate words and actions around you, but they are the parents. They co-parent, not anyone else. If you have a problem, you deal with your daughter. Maybe give her some consequences for not following through
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I would leave it between the parents and not allow him to swear if front of you and tell the child why you don’t want him to swear around you good luck 
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Not your place, just because you help take care of your grandchild “for free” doesn’t give you any parental rights or decision making. You need to let your daughter handle it.
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