I was wondering what age you Mamas take your children to a funeral? My husband’s Grandma passed & I’m not sure if I should allow my children to attend her funeral. They are 7 & 8.
My son went to my grandma’s when he was about 2 and my daughter went to my mom’s when she was a little over a year
My step daughter went to her grandmothers funeral and she will be 7 in a month… We only took her for the last hour of the viewing (she does not sit still or stay quiet) and made sure to explain it all to her before hand. I think 7 & 8 is a fine age
I think that is early enough
I wouldnt take your child. Just because i was forced to go see a friend of the family a day before she died and it still haunts me i was 8. Let your kids remember them alive and happy.
Take them. Death is part of living and growing up.
Been having that discussion myself in recent days. Mine is only 2, I feel that is much too young because she doesn’t know to sit still and be quiet fully. 7 and 8, would understand how to behave in that setting and if you feel they are old enough to understand the concept of death then it shouldn’t be a problem. You know your little ones better than anyone and know what they are capable of for their ages. If the kids were close to great-grandma, it may help them to have a goodbye… but again, YOU know your babies best.
At that age I took mine to the viewing but not the funeral.
I would have the discussion of life and death with them and if they understand, then take them. If they don’t, maybe you shouldnt.
My son went to his grandfather’s at about 2.5. He knew what was happening at a basic level and was fine. He remembers being able to say goodbye to Papou.
Take them, but don’t make them view the body if they don’t want to (also, don’t make them feel ashamed if they’re curious and do want to). Just prepare them for what to expect, and how you want them to behave (though my kids seemed to pick up the social cures from those around them, and were very quiet).
I went to my grandmothers and aunts and I was 6. And they’re old enough to attend if you go take them
Depends on the child.
I think it depends on the maturity of the children and the closeness of the family member! Use ur better judgment and explain it the best way u can!
My daughter was 2 turning 3 when her great grandpa died we took her to his funeral he was extremely close to her. I don’t think it’s something to avoid them from seeing death is completely normal and part of life they’re going to see it sooner or later.
My son has been going since he was very young. I want to say his first one he was under a year old and by age 4 he had been to at least 6 or 7. I don’t see why anyone would shelter their child from reality. It’s part of life. They should get to be there and say goodbye too even if it is in their own way. The longer you try to hide that from them the harder it is going to be on them when they do go to one.
talk to and talk them .
I took my children at 1 and 3 and 5 to their great grandfathers funeral
They’re old enough to make the choice at that age IMO. My oldest is 8. I’d absolutely leave it up to her whether she wanted to go or not.
I was about 7 and my brother was 5 when my grandfather passed away. My parents asked the funeral home if they could being us before the start of the wake so that we wouldn’t disturb the remainder of the family who would be there. We were able to go in with our parents, talk, and ask questions. It made the process of going to wakes in the future far less stressful. We had an understanding of what was expected of us, knew what we could expect, and had no surprises. Most importantly, my parents talked to us about it all.
Explain death to them in such a manner that the children can understand … Explain heaven to them if that’s something that is believed in. Explain angels or spirits, etc. Our kids (6 and 4) were old enough to have that conversation. Our daughter (<1 at the time) was too little to understand. The kids never saw the deceased, and were kept out of the viewing room.
I went to one around that age. I understood why we were there. To celebrate their life and say goodbye. But I wasn’t taken up to view the body though.
My littlest was only a few months old 🤷
I took my 2 to their grandfather’s funeral at the age.
Death is a part of life and funerals and memorials are part of how we deal with losing a loved one. I would bring my child at any age. I’ll add that my children are now adults and have attended many funerals in their lifetime.
They can go but maybe taking them up to the casket might NOT be a good idea. In case of nightmares
That depends on emotional maturity of your children. I took my children to their father’s funeral in February. They were 10 & 9.
How much do they understand about life and death currently? I gave my daughter the option of going to my grandmother’s funeral but shes been to many (when she was little) and she’s been very aware of death her whole life. She chose to go and felt okay about it, I just made sure to keep the lines of communication open and honest.
yes Ive taken them as young as 1 yr. My youngest went last year ( 9yrs) to his grandmothers and when he was 7 attended a classmates funeral.
They are fine ages to go. Talk to them before hand, give them a heads up on what’s gonna happen and how they are to behave. Tell them it’s ok to be sad and also ok to share happy stories of their loved one. Kids need to grieve too. Just remember that communication is big. Be honest and gentle. They are old enough. Sorry for your loss.
I went to many funerals before age 7. My kids are 4,10, and 3 months and never been to many as of yet but i would allow it.
We just had a sudden and tragic passing in my family. My son is 5, my cousin (only 20, like an uncle to him) passed away and my son understood what was happening. We talked a lot about it. He saw him in the ICU and then talked about the machines keeping him alive, then told him we would have to turn the machines off because the doctors couldn’t fix him. He said his goodbyes at the viewing and funeral. He understood what happened and we talked a lot about it. This was all in the last month, we still talk about it. He misses his cousin but knows he’s gone.
Explain to them what’s happening but take them. I was withheld from one funeral as a child due to a nasty divorce right before but poppop asked for us on his deathbed and my mom couldn’t face the family. We all regret not going. I am also a sibling to a still born baby and the father had the ashes until he felt closer and when I was about 14 or so he called my mom out of the blue and said it was time but he wanted her to bring me. I’ll never forget that day. We had lunch and he handed my mom those ashes in the tea canister my grandma painted and all my uncles had put a belonging in. She tucked it into my seatbelt next to me in the car and just reached out to touch it absentmindedly all the way home. Death is natural and should not be hidden.
My son was five when his Great Poppop passed. Since he had a relationship with Poppop, I explained what was happening and took him the following weekend to say goodbye. He had written a card to say goodbye.
We just went to a Great Grandparent funeral at age 3 and 5.
I think it really depends on the children I went to my first funeral when I was nine for my grandma and I had to go up to the casket and sit there and everything. My parents kind of gave me a heads up on what to expect and talk to me and my sister and make sure we had any fears or questions that they were answered
Thank you everyone. This is the first time that I’ve felt like they were both old enough to somewhat understand. My main worry was that they would be afraid. I really appreciate everyone’s opinions & advice.
If they are mature enough.
I took my oldest when she was maybe a yr for a family funeral .and my two youngest are your kids age and went under that also family they were between 3 and now.
I went to my grandfather’s when I was 6 I vaguely remember it but I remember
I took mine w hen there Gramma passed my go r l was 3 Amy d son was about 7… They did ok
Let them go and explain.
Let them ask questions and let them make the choice. Explain how to behave if needed
I took my greatgrandson but left before the viewing as she was my aunt he didnt know her
Death and grieving is a part of life. They are old enough to witness this and see what a beautiful long life his grandma had. Teach them about how important we all are to each other and how much we can impact someone else’s life. There is only one special you in the universe.
My son went to his first at like 6 months. His second was at 2 years.
My daughter went with us to my uncle’s funeral when she was 6, my son was in utero.
Honestly depends on how close they were.
My then 1, 4 and 6 yr old went to their great grandpa’s funeral. We also spend every other weekend at their house.
They needed to be able to say their goodbyes too.
My kids unfortunately have been to many. We don’t normally go to viewings but they do well during the actual service.
Depends how close they were to them. Just brought my 3 and 8 year old to their uncles open casket funeral and grandpas wake. The 3 year old didn’t have a clue what was going on and my 8 year old was a little emotional when he saw mom and dad crying. We talked to him about it after and he said he was a little scared but curious about seeing the dead body.
I went to my gramps when I was 4
Dying is part of life. As long as your children can be respectful then I’d take them.
I have always taken my children if it was someone they were at least familiar with.
If they know them, take them so they can say goodbye too. Jist tell them what to expect and how to act.
Mine are 4 and 8 they just went to their great grandmother’s. They were close to her and wanted to say goodbye
We took our 15 month old daughter to my partner’s grandmother’s funeral.
Its fine ecplane yo them yhis is just a part of life we dont live forever they understand more than you think
I went to my first funeral when I was 4 or 5, then at 6, then at 8, then at 10 and so on. Death is a part of life. As long as you have taught them how to sit still (being school aged this shouldn’t be a problem) and they can be respectful, I would take them. They are old enough to understand at this point.
When you know they are ready .
Let them decide for themselves. Mine went at 7 and 11
As everyone says death is the ending cycle of life. It’s always up to you as a parent to make those choices whether or not to take them. Usually the church has places for the children to be
We lost our mum/mother in-law two years ago our youngest was 6. He needed to say goodbye to his Grammy.
Death is part of life
Plus their is a separate room for kids
Just my opinion but a fee yrs back my daughters grandfather past and the family didn’t let her go she still talks about not going I say take them
Children are people too and they also deserve to say goodbye and pay their respects. I’ve taken mine at all different ages. I would say it’s ok at any age.
If they are close to her then yes they should go, I was 7 when I went to my first for my grandmother who I was very close to and it gave me the chance to say good bye. It is something that kids need to learn how to handle and they are at a good age.
Our daughter went at 4 to her great-grandfathers funeral. We did not let her view the body, because we didn’t want that to be her last memory of him. She has been full of questions and has since been more clingy. (It was just a month ago.) So be ready for questions and possible clinging. I feel they are old enough, but it is ultimately you and your husbands decision to make.
I wouldnt. At 26 I can still se my grandfathers dead expression. That’s not the picture I want in my head of him. I was brought to his deathbed and funeral when I was Bout 10
I don’t. I struggle at funerals so I won’t make my children go to one. I’d personally explain what it is and how it can be then ask if they’d like to go
Do they sit through church? Do you have safe care at home while you are at service? Take to visitation night before so they can say goodbyes and then let them tell you if they need the service.
My son went to his first funeral at 6months old, my daughter was 5 when I took her to her first funeral
Yes, let them. My mil passed, all her great grandchildren attended, they were from 3 to 10. There were 6 great grandchildren. 3, 4, 4, 7, 11, 11. They were amazing at the service and at the burial. We had no issues taking all great grandkids.