Yikes . My daughter is not even a teen and she’s been having sleep overs at a young age.
My daughter she’s 11. And she has a best friend since she was 7. I let her stay at her friends house or her friend stay at our house too. I’ve know the mom since 2019. she also has a second friend who she met last year in school. I’ve met both parents. This year it was the first time ever going for the weekend a few hours far away from me she went “camping. My daughter has a phone so i always texted her. I guess everyone has a different perspective on this. It’s up to you what you want to do.
My girls have had sleepovers at their friends house and they are 6 and 9
My mother would not let us do it. Our children did itva few times. I would never allow. You never know what they are walking into.
Yeah my son was like 7 or 8…. Losin up the leash a little bit. You being so over protective could back fire and make her want to explore more without your knowledge which is dangerous.
You’re either for or against sleep overs. If you don’t want to allow them, then when they become an adult.
Protect your kids. Assess the home and people before blindly letting your child stay the night.
However saying no every single time is going to create a super resentful child who thinks you’re a pain in the ass. Eventually the asking will stop and they’ll just start doing.
The concept of sleeping at a stranger house is weird to me. I didn’t do it certainly will not allow my kids to do it.
My daughter was 7 when she started. Teenagers???
I’m not a mom and let me say I wouldn’t not in this world we live in these days unless they come over to your house maybe
My daughter has been having sleepovers since she was about 4. First with cousins, then she started all star cheer at age 8. I spent a lot of time with the other parents so I felt comfortable letting her go to their houses and even travel with some of the parents. I got to know entire families not just a parent or 2. However I did not and do not allow her to go to sleepovers with school friends because I do not know those parents and meeting them is not enough to trust them with my child. I got into some uncomfortable situations when I was younger at sleepovers and I don’t want that to happen with my daughter. I’ll also add that I knew the cheer parents for over a year before I allowed sleepovers outside my house. The kids are always welcome at my house.
Our 10 year old has but there were things going on that never should have. I’m very leery now.
I don’t allow sleepovers outside of my home and will not ever allow sleepovers outside of my home. My kids can have friends sleep at my home but they absolutely will not be going there
My daughter started about 7
My son was I think 3 when he first sleepover at his friend’s house without me. He is almost 8 now and will have the occasional sleepover at his cousins house. He has also spent a couple nights at one of his former sitters houses
Teach them how to stay safe. And how they can talk to you about anything. That there are no secreats that have to be kept. Esp if they have been told they have to keep anything not nice a secreat. Only thing would be surprises to be kept so it wouldnt spoil the surprise. A feel good nice thing for someone.
Teach them how different these 2 things are.
Teens will rebell if you keep a tight rein on them. Give them the knowledge and trust to be able learn.
Get the friend stay a few times first and dont be hard on them. Show them you trust them. But its everyone else that have caused these issues.
Build up to a sleep over.
I was molested at a sleepover by someone’s dad. So that’ll never happen with mines. They’ll grown and learn to understand. Especially when they have their own kids.
Helicopter mom. You must be. That poor child. You know what week happen? They’ll turn 18 and either run off or move out. Why? Because you are obviously a control freak. That’s not okay. You’re supposed to be preparing them for adulthood, not controlling every aspect of their lives. It’s normal to want to keep them safe, or is not normal for them to be s teenager and never have had a sleepover.
My kids including two teens and a preteen ain’t none of them really had a sleepover unless it was at grandmas house. I don’t trust people. You never know how their home functions. And the child living in that home is gonna think that it’s normal. Unless you know the parents very well I wouldn’t let it happen. At least not till they are old enough to drive themselves home if something gets out of hand
I’ve(my SO and I discussed it in length) decided that there will be no sleepovers until there is an established line of communication, and we know the parents and household dynamic. We want to have met the parents more than once and be on first name basis, had dinner or BBQs a few times before we would allow my kiddo to go. I used tot think my mom was crazy for wanting addresses, home and work numbers, to meet them and know who all lived in the house and who would be there the whole time but now that I have my own daughter she was a absolutely right. The world has changed since then and not for the better. They want a sleepover that bad it can happen at my house to where I fully expect the other parents to feel the same way and want our names, to meet and talk with us etc.
My daughter started in first grade. I’m friends with the other child’s mother. She was 9 when she was going to stay at another friends house for a sleepover but the parents ended up calling us all to come get them because they didn’t realize a house full of 9 year old girls was a bad idea I personally had several friends that I had sleepovers with growing up. If my kids have a long term friend they want to sleep over or sleep over at their house then I’ll let them I also teach my kids how to defend themselves if anything ever happened.
You either are ok with it or you’re not. I did them from grade school on up.
Then again, my mom knew the kids and the parents. I also knew I could go home whenever I wanted.
But if you’re scared, don’t give her your fears. That’s not fair. Sat rules and explain why you have them. She’s a teen, not 5. Have the discussion. Be available for pick up if she changes her mind. Understand, the tighter you hold on, the odds are pretty good that when she’s gone, she may go a little nuts bc Freedom is new.
You think a sleep over is worrisome?? Lol Yeah, wait until they leave.
Most kids mine included started sleep overs when they were in pre-school… don’t be so hard on her I understand wanting her to be safe but mama she needs to see the real world believe me she will be an adult faster than u know.
I think you’re being a bit extreme for not letting her have a sleepover yet. A teen! I mean seriously! Get to know the friends parents and once your comfortable with them let her stay over.
Never , they can sleep over my house. My child will not be sexually abused
My 6 year old has been having sleep overs since she was like 8 months old
Once you know and are comfortable with the parents, their household, etc.
My mom didn’t trust anyone. she let my older sister spend the night with friends but never let me. I was allowed to stay with my aunt and my cousin. My son has stayed with a friend (he is 6) my daughter is 5 she hasn’t stayed with friends yet.
My kid has been going to sleepovers at her friends since she was about 8, and her friends have come here to her house as well.
My teens have sleepovers often! But they are always at my house.
Mine are only 3 and 7 but i think definitely by preteen I’d let them as long as i had met the parents and friends before. If you are doing a good job of raising them then they should be fine and know to call if anything seems off. Maybe send a cell phone with them and talk about a code phrase they can say if they are uncomfortable and then if they call and say for example “did you wash my uniform?” You’ll know they are uncomfortable and can call the parents and make up an excuse why you need to pick them up early. Then they aren’t embarrassed but they are also safe.
She is a teen that should have happened already
My kids have never slept away from home and I have no plans for them to start. I have no one I trust enough to take care of them.
each kid is ready at different ages… I was 7. my daughter was around 9 when she was ready. she has 2 friends who would stay the whole weekend.
every parent worries, but as kids they need to be doing kid things like the sleepover they want
You have to let go and have trust in them you can’t protect them forever
When I was in middle school I was allowed to stay at other peoples houses. And my parents were fairly strict. I’d say a teen is definitely able. They’re old enough to know right from wrong and communicate if something happens.
I think my daughter was like 6 when she had her first sleep away sleep over
Teens? I had sleep overs around age 8.
I had sleepovers away from home around 7 or 8. By my teenage years I was spending weekends at my best friends’ houses. We alternated each weekend whose house the sleepover would be at.
Mine have since 5 so yea.
My mom didn’t let use have sleepovers unless she was comfortable with the parents. She would have to meet the parents and spend time with them numerous times before we were aloud to stay at someone’s house. She wanted to make sure we were safe. Also because it was a small town if we needed to get away for whatever reason she would have us memorize the way to one of her friends houses that was close by for emergencies. Then we would have to call her before we went to bed and in the morning, we had a special “safe words” that we had to use while talking to let her know if things were OK or not and we weren’t allowed to tell people what they were. Like it seemed like alot and like it was ridiculous alot of the time but there were a number of times it did help out too. When my kids get old enough I actually plan on using those methods.
My youngest is 11 she has had sleepovers sense she was in school.
We meet the parents, get phone numbers and addresses.
As long as there are adults there you know and trust as parents, why not?
If you don’t feel safe letting her go then don’t! Listen to your gut!
I allow sleep overs at my house only. Not at someone else’s. It doesn’t matter how long I’ve known the family. You don’t who else is there or who stops by.
I had neighbors that had a 10 yr old daughter. They allowed her to stay the night with a family they had known for years. The friends had three daughters 10, 15 and 17. The 15 yr old daughter had a 15 ye old boyfriend over. And he raped the the 10 yr old three times that night while everyone else slept. It took the daughter almost three months to tell her parents.
Nope . Sorry but it happens more then you wanna believe.
I was 6. My daughter was 6. A fun time growing up.
My girls in about 3rd grade, they were girl scoutsand we’d have den camping to progress up to outdoor camping.
I started out letting the kids come over for a day and get to know them frist
Teens?! Holy helicopter parents. I had sleep overs at like age 4. By the time I was a teenager it wasnt sleep overs at friends but my boyfriends house
Bro I was a CHILD yeah your not being fair
Either let her or she will sneak out… my girls have been doing sleepovers since they were around 5 years old. Sometimes they come to my house other times they go to the friends house.
NEVER can’t trust nobody
My kids have had sleepovers since they were little. With trusted family or very close friends.
My 15 year old son pretty much never sleeps at home on weekends
If you know and trust the family, any age is ok.
I totally get it! But don’t keep her from it. Get more involved, know where she is and who she is with. I believe you should know your kids friends parents just as much as your kids know their friend.
You host the sleepovers that way you know the goings on. And then you still may not know.
FYI: Beware of “teen gatherings.” It is often used as a cover for other agendas. Anywhere! Any place! Youth groups, etc!
The teen years are my favorite! That being said… remember that teens are not ALWAYS forthright. Stay diligent and ALWAYS read between the lines. Even the innocent fool their folks. Just sayin’. Happy parenting!
I wasnt really ever allowed eventually I want invited anywhere anymore cuz I was “never allowed” and I missed out on alot because of it
I never let my two sons sleep anywhere but my house . I rather let their friends sleep here . I don’t trust anyone.
I guess it’s one of those “different strokes for different folks” type of things…. Cause even younger kids have sleepovers after birthday parties or with cousins.
I don’t allow sleepovers unless it’s family I trust
Set up a safe phrase like
“ when I get home can I have chocolate ice cream”. You know your child’s uncomfortable and with out question you say yes and show up for her telling them you have an emergency and need to pick her up
I went to my first sleepover when I was about seven or eight. One of the girls (who was older than me) at the sleepover started crying and ended up calling her mom to go home. It just depends on when they feel comfortable and safe. Make sure she knows she can call you or text you to come get her if she feels uncomfortable or unsafe for any reason.
Six when I stayed across the street with my BFF. But my mother talked to her mother. I was allowed to stay if my mom talked to their mom. Now saying that I did end in a bad situation one night. I actually called my mother from another house several over that belonged to a different friend and went home. I told my mother I wasn’t harmed but was worried. She came and got me and when I said I don’t want to discuss it further she didn’t. It was the end of a friendship and my mom took my word I no longer wanted to be friends with Pam. And that was before cell phones.
My kids won’t be sleeping over at no ones house in this day and age I don’t care how old they are once they turn 18 maybe 21 lol they can do whatever they want
I was 12 when allowed to sleep over. My Mom always insisted talking to the other Mom whose house we stayed. This was in the 50s.
My son had his first sleepover at a friend’s house at 4yo. He started going to grandparents overnight by 6 months.
I started staying overnight with my cousin when I was pretty young. But I didn’t stay with a friend until I was 13. It was a slumber party and my friends 13th birthday.
My daughter is 6 and has stayed for a week 3 hours south to family’s house but to friends it probably won’t be until she is 13
A neighbor & friend took me kids while I was at a work event & was going to keep them overnight if I was going to get back late. Got back early enough, my 6-year old son came out, but my 3-year-old daughter stood at the top of the stairs & said, “Well, I came to SPEND THE NIGHT!” Alrighty then.
Just have a talk with your teen about being safe, give her a phone to talk or text you if anything seems fishy. Maybe have code words to have an excuse to pick her up right away if he’s embarrassed to say he wants to go back home. Get to know he families of her friends so you feel safer about it.
My 6 year old has sleep over with his bestie. Think they’re too young as the moment to be causing too much trouble…
Depends if you know the parents
You must really know and trust the parents where your kids go. It can be dangerous
No sleepovers, as a social worker I say be careful if you do.
As a mother to a SA survivor, I don’t allow my children to stay over at anyone’s house. Unless I know the family and they know my daughters history. My kids are only allowed to stay over at 1 friends house and that because we are friends with the whole family.
Not unless it’s family no and even the family I just truly trust because you never really know people. We’ve had people in my family who have been touched and raped by family members and non family members … luckily all those pervs are dead now but still even just talking to the other parent don’t mean shit because you never know what people do behind closed doors… but she is at that age where she’s ready and now kids have phones and they can always call or text if their uncomfortable we didn’t have that growing up . my kids are still really young so they don’t have phones and things like that yet
Ummmmm let peeps stay at your house, my daughter didn’t sleep out until she was 12 and it was right across the street, no brothers and dad was away on business, I was neurotic
My kids have been having sleepovers at friends houses since they started school.
I started staying over my best friends house when I was in I think 6th grade? We stayed up talking to creeps on the internet though. 10/10 would not recommend
If I know the family very well, I am much more likely to be ok with it. My kids won’t ever be allowed to sleep at a strangers house.
My daughter is now 10, she’s been having sleepovers with her two friends since first grade. However I’ve known the parents my entire life. But now she’s 10, she’s been to friends houses that I haven’t known parents as long. She has a cell phone and can reach me at any time day or night. We have a code word/words that mean come get me now. Teach your children how to react in certain situations and they’ll know what to do.