What are some ways I can calm my toddler?

2nd-time mom, so I’ve been through this before, but it seems worse this time. Two-year-old cries all the time takes forever to calm him down. This just started over the last month or so. I am trying to only nurse at night. Going for a walk seemed to help on the 1st. What are some other tricks or tips because my Mary Poppins bag is empty. Tried reading, music, redirect change toys. It calms for a time but not constantly. I know there are a lot of changes, and it may just be frustrating unable to communicate all needs. We talk and read books all the time, even ASL. But there are still tantrums. Anyone else going through this too? Thanks.


Quit trying so hard, make sure hes safe and walk away…he needs to learn to calm himself. Give him a few tools… I use to walk away and told my daughter let me know when she was done and we can go back to having fun


This sounds like my daughter. She’s in a pretty independent phase, so I usually just make sure she isn’t hurt, make sure she’s safe, and walk away. It works.

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Mine seems to settle when I tell her that I understand she is angry. Then I tell her it’s so okay to be angry but we have to use our words about it. Then I tell her to say angry, a few times. She’s 20 months and only says a few words, so she’ll jabber, hug and pat and then it’s over.
does not work every time I just keep doing that :woman_shrugging:

5 time mom here. My kids range in age from 4 to 24. Tantrums at 2 years old is normal. Its their way of communicating anger and irritability. The child might be teething. 2 year olds cut molars and it is very painful. When you have tried everything else, try giving a dose of tylenol or children’s motrin. The child might be in pain and unable to communicate that.

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All kids are different; I’ve had four and they were all unique. Sometimes, they just want to know that you love them, even when they’re falling apart. Keep trying; the same old tricks might work in rotation. I feel your frustration. Holding my special needs daughter tightly when she’s tantruming is the only thing that helps her, but even that doesn’t work consistently. Sometimes, she just has to wind herself down.

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Honestly my almost 2 yr old says a ton of words and still acts this way- she does it because it gets her attention. We look at her and tell her “no!” “You do not scream” very sternly and she sometimes stops- if she doesn’t I’ll sit her in time out for 2min and then go and love on her. It’s been helping- so has one on one positive attention.

Sounds like normal development. But if it doesn’t seem like anything is help it could be teething or even an ear infection. Something that hurts and he can’t say it hurts.

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Yes! I have I have 4 kids and 3 are boys. My boys always would throw tantrums. Now they were all different when it came to calming them down so not everything works for every kid, but some tricks I used were… one time I just started acting like one of my sons when he started acting insane and he saw how it looked and he started to get better after that. My other son I started to ignore him when he would act that way. Because sometime I think they do it for attention. And negative attention is still attention and once he sees it doesn’t work eventually he will get the hint it might take time but it will work for some kids. My other son was a little harder. He has to have stuff taken away and I have to put him in time out or spank him. That is how he learns. I know some people are against that but I tried everything else. I don’t have to do that often anymore time-out in another room works now. He calms down and realizes that he is missing play time and stops the behavior. Hope this helps.

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Consider a speech evaluation if very few words (my 18 month old had 1 word so we stared speech and he taking up a storm now at 24 months). Also an occupational therapy evaluation for sensory issues and difficulties with self regulation. As an OT tantrums are normal for that age but increased length of tantrum/ frequency and difficulty recovering can indicate inability to self regulate.

When mine threw a tantrum I would throw one too. It worked for me they would stop and look and wonder what is she doing I’m the one upset. Most times it worked other times they threw an even bigger fit.

Ask for an evaluation from a developmental pediatrician this is exactly how my oldest daughter’s issues started. Her problems started at about 18 months. Also consider reflux. Reflux is usually much worse n the evenings.

Lavendar baby bath and if they even still have the cartoon Kipper on, it worked for my kids. Kipper is a very calm narrative cartoon. Loved the cartoon, it put me to sleep a few times. Good luck

Stop the nursing, read 2 books, put on music. Run and play with him all day and he will be worn out!

We put Celine Dion music on and walked out of too. Cried first night. Then fell asleep after that.

My nephew just recently had some of this with his 3 year old at night. They are using a sticker chart and seems to be helping

Just deal with it if will not last forever. They are acting out because they have not developed there words. Be patience and enjoy these crazy years

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Google calm down jars, water bottle filled with water and glue, glitter… let them sit and watch it.

Just let him pitch a fit and ignore it. The more attention he gets from it the more he’ll do it.


I don’t have suggestions but you said ASL. Is your child Deaf?

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I found 3 to be a wonderful age.

What my mother would do was to tell them they weren’t yelling loud enough, if the people driving past where we were couldn’t hear them in their cars there was no use in yelling and screaming. They were putting their all into the tantrum and mommy was telling them they weren’t loud enough. Usually after 1 time but usually after 2 or 3 times the tanteums stopped and crying or sobbing replaced the loud tantrum and that we could deal with, with hugs and cuddles.

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See the doctor to eliminate ear infection, teething and acid reflux. Then it may take trial and error but there are several options from these others who commented that you can try. This age requires a lot of diligence to find what works for your child. Don’t give up, you can do it.

I use a teething ring for mine.

Walk away and tell him when he’s calm we can come talk