So last night my boyfriend brought up that he thinks all three of us are “functional autistics” (me, him and our son). And to be honest, while I’ve been saying our son (2 years old next month) is most likely autistic, I didn’t really think of us parents being autistic. Me, I could see it but I never really thought of my boyfriend as autistic. But now, I can kind of see it. For those here who are autistic and their partner and kid(s) are also, what are some tips I could get from y’all? Idk I’m still just trying to wrap my head around all these challenges we’ve had lately and I’m so stressed
Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. What are the signs of Autism in adults?
I am not sure why everyone puts a lable on people who are different. If you’re functioning on your own, you’re just a human, in my opinion.
Big eye roll You most likely would’ve been diagnosed with it a long time ago Still too soon for your 2 year old to be diagnosed.
Some people over use the word autistic. A person can be a little slow or just learn differently but it doesn’t make them autistic. Even if your behind in some areas in life. We all have our strengths and weaknesses. If your concern for yourself and your boyfriend is concerned for himself see a doctor same for the child.
Everyone has some level of autistic traits. The downfall is people use these terms all the time . If you’re looking for something you will see it. If you definitely have concerns about your 2 years old getting him evaluated and if needed early intervention will help a lot. Talk to your actual doctor about any concerns you may have if you really think you have symptoms or concerns that w aren’t able to handle with your current coping skills.
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Google the symptoms and everyone should get tested.
Honestly as an autistic adult, don’t look here. Go look in autistic spaces and ask the #ActuallyAutistic community, because when you seek these types of opinions from a generalized community you run a higher risk of unfair judgement, and a MUCH higher risk of receiving misinformation. So please come join us in our spaces we would love to have you and help you figure this out.
Took me 29 yrs to even realize it was a possibility for me. Makes so much sense now.
I’m in the process of being tested my oldest was diagnosed at 6
Christ all mighty we are really doomed as a race, you take away from the people that are actually autistic.
I’ve been autistic all along?
Follow this link and ask there or just read along… That page is all inclusive whether you have a formal diagnosis or not… Try to seek out pages that are mainly dedicated to understanding what you need help with… Not anonymous posts on a public ask and answer page…
Say the was good, without saying the was good
I have autism and I have 4 kids my boyfriend has never been diagnosed with autism just dyslexia
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Watch on Netflix, love on the spectrum and see if you can relate
Adhd is also similar traits to autism
I have sorry but I have never heard of anything so silly in my life how in the world are you diagnosing a two-year-old is being autistic? Are you a trained psychologist or psychiatrist or medical doctor? Because if you’re not you are in no way qualified to diagnosed anyone sounds like you all want to have autism this is the most strangest post I’ve ever seen I’m sure none of use are autistic it’s quite silly if you think you are go to a doctor and have this either confirmed or denied
You’re stressing over something only a physician or medical professional can diagnose. Don’t get caught up in social media diagnoses.
Were a neurodivergent family. It’s taken me a long time to realize stuff
Has a Dr diagnosed either of y’all?
Talk to do a doctor and get evaluated.
Functional autistic. Oh my this is such problematic language. There is no hierarchy of “how” autistic you are. You can’t have a slight case of autism. It is ASD, autism spectrum disorder and statements like that make people who are in the community feel less than. It is also highly rude to refer to behaviors you have as being autistic because it isn’t a trend or something to label your weird habits as. Now as for your question my husband has autism and so does my son. My daughter is also on a waiting list for her evaluation. It is common for families to have multiple people with autism. If you believe your child is autistic you need to find someone to evaluate him. They also will evaluate adults as well.
I would recommend making an appointment with your doctor and having all of you evaluated. It seems like with the two of you adults that it would have shown up when you were children. Your parents would have noticed something wasn’t right and said something to you about it. Anything is possible I suppose. But get checked out.
Talk to psychologists or your doctors. They will support you with any early intervention if necessary. It’s not too early at all, it can be diagnosed even at 1 year and reevaluated later on to make sure it was correct. Join Autism Inclusivity
I’m currently going through the process of being tested for autism
This post is crazy! We qre in the process of getting my 4 year old son tested and it’s been almost 2 years of different tests and doctors and specialists… how can you say he most likely is autism… why don’t you go to a doctor and actually find out? You’re talking like it isn’t a big deal but if you think your child has it then please seek proper medical advice.
People are so desperate nowadays to put a label on their kids with no medical diagnosis now adults are at it now too labelling themselves it’s ridiculous
The first thing you can do is not self diagnose
Ask your doctor to diagnose not Facebook
My 7 year old is autistic, however I only have sensory issues. Which is not particularly autistic as it never showed until I was in my late teens.
Autism is genetic though and my mother was autistic. If your wondering about it I would talk to your doctor and see what they say I wouldn’t really ask a group of people though not alot of people care to be educated about autism.
Talk to dr because you won’t know unless evaluated
As an autistic person, I’d advise you to go get an evaluation. Everyone on social media has an opinion, but most of their opinions aren’t worth the time they took to type them.
Go get a formal diagnosis. Even if you aren’t autistic, you’ll be on the path to getting help for your unique disability.
One thing I’d strongly recommend against is claiming to be autistic without a formal diagnosis. There is a vocal group of people who claim it doesn’t matter if you have a formal diagnosis. They are wrong.
When you claim to have a disability you do not have, you’re doing yourself a disservice by not finding out what disability you truly have. You’re also doing the autistic community a disservice by using services (which can be limited) that you don’t actually need.
God why is everyone so angry and on the defensive
I’m autistic and wasn’t diagnosed till i was an adult. I have routine and repetition with foods, and the way I go places, and how I do things. I’m sensitive to lights and noise. My meltdowns are like panic attacks on steroids. You can message me if you want. I have a blanket I will throw a fit over if I don’t have it.
I’m autistic but didn’t get diagnosed until about a year ago I’m 31. Autism is different for everyone
It’s best to have a therapist or a dr to tell you…I diagnosed myself with ADHD…I have no idea if I actually have it but it definitely seems so.
Sounds to me like your boyfriend is refusing to admit that His child would never have any type of flaw and therefore is blowing it off and making it unimportant.
I’m sorry your going thru this alone. Talk to your pediatrician about how your child is doing. He can refer you to a Dr that may be able to guide you thru this. I believe you need to see a neurologist. I’m sure your boyfriend will be too scared to do that with you. If he doesn’t support you in the caring if your child I would think twice before staying around him. He sounds mentally abusive to me . God bless.
Take your son to a pediatric behavioral dr for a proper dx asap .earlier they find issues better the outcome w what is done
Get an evaluation. There are support groups to help you. You’ve gotten this far you’re doing great. Learn social ques.
There could be other things going on, never trust self diagnosis. Let drs. Tell you what’s going on.￼
Am I the only one that’s a little offended by OPs lack of respect towards Autism? Like, let’s just gather ourselves and call ourselves Autistic without any assessments or diagnosis.
Ok you can’t be diagnosing yourself and especially not diagnose your child without an evaluation.
-routine or set way things need to be
-often seen as socially abnormal or sense of humor is misunderstood
-hard time understanding how others are feeling
-hard time reading facial expressions or tone
-fixations on certain things or hobbies (my son it’s fortnite, Pokémon, spooky things etc)
-stemming ie. certain movements or sounds. My son flaps when excited and makes this “mmm-mmm” noise
Many people realize they might be neurodivergent when they notice their child might be neurodivergent. There has been a lot more information out there about it and people are seeing possible connections. So many more people are nd than most people realize.
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Autism is genetic, so if your son gets assessed and shows that he is, in fact autistic, then one (or both of you) is also autistic!
This is how my son’s doctor explained it to me.
So you just self diagnosed yourself I see. Go see a psychiatrist.
Autism is a huge scale . Also it is sometimes genetic
Don’t diagnose yourself. Go get tested if you think you are.
Mindy Rutherford I’m a nurse… your putting too much credit toward the DSM. Worked as a Director of nursing. I also have severe asthma/have coded several times. In 80’s Asthma wasn’t in DSM so couldn’t be considered a “real” diagnosis—big eye roll back at ya! A little common sense in this world would do wonders!
This requires a profession disagnosis. Not symptoms they googled
Many adult autism diagnoses start with what ill-informed commenters are referring to as “self-diagnosis.” Especially for anyone AFAB, autism is under diagnosed because the majority of research was based off of young male children. Considering the nature of being neurodivergent, IF the person turns out to be actually autistic, it is very likely they did immense research to understand why they are “different,” before bringing their findings/inclinations to a professional. Depending on location it can take years to get an assessment, and somewhere like the US, it is a privilege that many in certain socioeconomic situations are not ever afforded.
Regardless, OP didn’t ask for anyone to validate her methods of seeking a dx. My suggestion would be for OP to send this question over to an actually autistic community such as Neurodivergent Rebel, someone whose resources helped me reframe my own coping strategies and feel understood while I navigated my own adult dx
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A 2 month old is too young to be tested. You and your BF can be tested to see if you all are autistic or not. Why haven’t you been tested already?
Shouldn’t you see a dr for that instead of trying to self diagnose yourself? I think you’d spare yourself a lot of frustration confusion and anxiety if you didn’t try to self diagnose yourself, I know it can be a very stressful situation.
Too many ppl are so quick to throw the autistic card.
The best tip is to get an evaluation and join therapies and support groups
Everyone who has autism is DIFFERENT from person to person.
I know some people that have autism and you literally can’t tell, others are very shut in and not social, others are super social. They all have quirks. 2 years old is to young to be diagnosed with autism.
Why would your boyfriend think your all high functioning? What do you think autism is?
I work with adults daily that have autism-EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEM IS DIFFERENT.
Seek advice from a professional. Don’t hang that label on you until it’s professionally diagnosed. Don’t stress.
A great place to start is at the below website. They have the RAADS-R test (and others) online. I suggest both you and your boyfriend do the test and see how you score. You can do the CAT-Q test as well since women are more likely to mask neurotypical behaviour because of social conditioning since childhood. From there you can get your child formally diagnosed. Diagnosis in children can help with schools etc.
To be honest, getting a formal diagnosis as an adult if you are on the minimal support end of the spectrum can be costly and not quite worth it. There is no cure BUT if you do score high on the tests, you can use the information to manage your life better - getting resources in place to support you. Just know that the majority of the adult autistic community is perfectly okay with self diagnosis and not judgemental (we know the stigma around autism and know how mean allistic peeps can be).
First, many diagnoses not just autism, start as self-diagnosis. I personally found the answers for what was causing multiple of my physical conditions way before my doctor’s did. Also, self-diagnosis is valid within the autistic community of people. So many are brushed off by doctors, many of whom still believe that women CANNOT be autistic, many do not have the financial resources or even access to places that test in order to be tested. The tests are also really lacking when it comes to testing women, adults, and POC because all of our known research and testing has been done on and geared for young white males. Many testers don’t take into consideration that a person may have been forced to mask for years if not decades by the time they see them based on their gender or cultural expectations.
I would definitely get diagnosed if you’re concerned. I have ADHD and my ex is Autistic. Two of our three are Autistic. All of us diagnosed by a professional. Sometimes I wonder if I’m actually Autistic and I’ve brought this us to my doctor and she affirms that I just have ADHD and that certain aspects of ADHD can present as Autistic features. She also said that a lot of other diagnosis present like Autism as well and it really takes a diagnosis by a professional to sort out where you land.
You can have other illinesses that are the same as autism but not actually be autistic. For example you can be sensory sensitive & become overwhelmed easily. And or you can have PTSD due to trauma which can cause you to not to enjoy physical contact or being around people.
We picked up signs of Autism in my son at 17 months old and he was referred through his Health Visitor. My son is now 5. He has ASD, SPD and is non-verbal. The earlier the intervention the better in our experience.
I have autism and I have 2 out 4 of my kids with autism also.
But there’s a difderence- women are harder to diagnose then men and we have different affects. My son is nothing like me or my daughter.
You could also have sensory disorder, adhd, anxiety and some others.
It’s harder to diagnose an adult and looking at different diagnoses can help you search what you feel, think is going on.
If your son might be autistic, getting him diagnosed sooner rather then later is best.
Just get tested no way to know 4 sure without that and it’s not something to be worried about
So stop trying to diagnose yourself. For instance my son is autistic and I have ADHD but when I take the online tests it says I have autism, because of my ADHD… ADHD is so similar to autism. Go to a doctor and get a diagnosis. So tired of these people self diagnosing themselves and calling themselves the “actually autistic” community. Please go get you, your son and bf tested by a specialist.
They have test now to determine autism in adults I follow a family with both parents and sin autistic they are the reason I know of the test they share their experiences I CAnt remember her name for the life of me but it’s Pamela pumpkin lady who does funny videos and her husband