Throw her phone away in front of her. Be the boss.
Take that phone away, my kids never got one until they were 15 no reason for her to have one, she’s not mature enough , to follow rules she doesn’t need it, it’s kids like this that meet wrong people and end up dead in ditches, take the phone.
As a person who once had her tiny flip phone taken away indefinitely after having it for like a month because I was texting someone who wasn’t on the same phone plan as us….you’re not being strict and she will live without a phone. I didn’t get a phone again until I was 18 and I got it with my own money. Get her an alarm clock.
Lol my kids aren’t getting a phone until they can afford it themselves. I didn’t get a phone until I was 18 (different time because that’s when everyone was just starting to get phones) but I only got it because I had a job
I have the app qustodio on my sons phone. You can block certain apps, set restricted times, see exactly what they’re doing. I highly recommend. I also don’t recommend letting younger kids on YouTube or tiktok. Too much adult content on there
Definitely wouldn’t let her have one at that age. I used Bark for a long time with my daughter. And now she has an IPhone so they have great settings that can only be changed by the person in charge. But if she isn’t respecting you enough and is deleting phones calls etc I would definitely not let her have a phone at all! I also don’t let my 15 year old have social media at all.
I wouldn’t have let her have the phone- my 12.5yo doesn’t have one when I do give him on there will be access to zero social media
Take it away and don’t give it back. Tell her when she can afford to pay for the phone and the contract get a job, Then she can get one.
If you have the same service as her, get a parent app from your cell company. It allows me to put trusted people she can call and text, it let’s me limit, calls, text and social media as well as online. I can see all numbers called and texted and time and duration. I can block numbers and she can’t control any of it. It also allows me to see her location and for the older kids it let’s me see there driving speeds.
Take it off her. She’s 11. She doesn’t need it. If she wants it she can earn it back, but she needs to understand its a privilege not a right. I personally wouldn’t let her have it at all. She’s a kid. My nearly 11 yr old is nowhere near getting a phone. Absolutely not. But that’s just me,no judgement x
Who is the parent here you or her? And you let her have Tik Tok??!
I’ve made a deal with my eldest.
If he can make it to 18 with no phone or social media I will buy his any phone he wants for his 18th birthday and he has majority freedom with it.
We don’t do technology much in this house though …
Take it away. Be the parent. An 11 yr old does not need a phone
You’re the grown up. Take the phone and stand firm. She won’t hate you forever, I promise. She will tell you she’s the only one with no phone, and that everyone laughs/bullies/pities her. Nope. You need to get better control of her now, because better days are not coming.
my son did this. I set up parental controls that are linked to my email and require a password to access outside of the times I set up. When it’s bedtime it goes into our room still, since he was caught previously on it after he was supposed to be in bed. We have him take it to school as it has a tracking app. But when he comes home it gets put up until his homework and chores are done. Then he has to ask and let us know what he’s doing. When he’s done it gets put back up. We had to block certain apps as he is going through puberty and some things he was looking up are a little advance for his age. He knows if he goes over his data it is his responsibility to pay the extra. He makes money doing chores.
If she must have a phone give her a basic non smart phone that will not use apps, she can still call and text and do a tablet that you control, no tablet unless chores and homework is done.
My child would not have a phone at age 11. Gifted or not & id be having a talk to that person who gifted the phone and tell them not to do that sort of thing again. Let kids be kids!
Buy a regular alarm and put a password on the restriction part so she can’t get into it
I gave my oldest child a phone at a young age and everything was and is fine. No issues. I gave my 2nd child a phone and bam lies, deleting stuff, attempting to talk to people online. So I took it, she has no phone or internet access outside using my phone again. The internet is not a place for a child who can’t make the right decisions. I apologized to my child for believing this was an age appropriate gift and gave her the money for the cost of the phone since it was a gift. No phones for at least 2 years. Not my child not today, tomorrow or anytime soon.
Take it away. She is probably talking to someone you wouldn’t want her to or she would not be deleting info and parental restrictions are there for a reason.
Break it and get her an alarm clock. She wouldn’t see a phone again until she was 18
I wound up taking the iPhone away from my daughter at that age for that same reason. Being sneaky on tik tok making accounts and everything. She never got it back. She was changing the restrictions also. Grounded her for a month and on Xmas I wound up just getting her a phone she was only able to talk and text on. It’s called gabb wireless. No internet access or apps on it.
First, educate yourself that’s the biggest benefit you can do for yourself. Watch YouTube videos if you have to on how to operate restrictive apps. 2) buy her an alarm and don’t allow her to keep her phone in her room if she is using it past her bedtime. I definitely would allow more then a hour on the phone but not 6 hrs. I would allow 3 hrs a day that is sufficient. As a mom to a 10 yr old with a phone, they will definitely take advantage of your ignorance if you allow them to.
All these conversations should have come up before she got the phone to me. 11 is awfully young and a house phone should have been in place in case no one was home when she got home from school… Then you can start by letting her earn the privilege of having a phone. If it was gifted to her you as mom need to realize she is only 11 and the person giving the phone needs to realize that as well. An hour a day till your 12 is a great idea. She has a whole year to learn about phones. Then walk it up. What is the phone for anyway? Usually for when there away to call home. Till she is old enough to respect a phone 1 hour is plenty. I think the sound of freedom every child and family should see it’s a great lesson learned and it’s coming on streaming now so if the child or children haven’t seen it it would be a plus.
Take away my girls don’t have phones at 11 and 12 but do have tablets took those away until homework and school work done and turned in and help around house help around house is both but doing the school work have to worry about with 12 yr old.
get a bark phone. you control it from your phone and she can’t do that anymore
She’s 11…… she doesn’t need a phone! Be an adult and go to the phone carrier and get a list of phone calls and text messages! You pay the bill! You can be in control……
They have parent apps you can control from your phone. You just have to pay. The one I’m investing in is $60 for the year, and I know every text message, phone call, anything she does.
Personally, if she can’t follow the rules, take the phone away. It’s not a necessity
Look into apps that connects her phone to u. There’s some out there that alert you if sje using any “key” words that could be alarming. Some let u lock her phone any time. And some even will lock her phone of she doesn’t respond to u in whatever time frame u set. So many options.
Too young for the responsibility of a phone. Take it away until she is able to show you that she is responsible with it. Remember when we were kids and parents were told to watch their kids internet usage? It’s the same thing, she does not need a phone, where ever she is there should be a responsible adult present who should have a phone or way to get into contact with you. She is only 11.
In my opinion 11 years old is way too young to be on you tube or tik tok.
The calls wouldn’t worry me near as much as those two things. My grandson is going on 14 and he still doesn’t have access to those, FB or even Google on his phone.
Make her set the restrictions back and tell her if she breaks the rules again she will lose it permanently. Social media is not healthy for kids. Plus I would try to learn about her phone so she can’t hide things from you. Kids are smart and learn all the tricks from school friends.
if its an android u can go into settings and turn on digital well being and parental conteols. ull have to dl a app called family link. u can lock her phone w.e habe herbrequest to dl apps block apps from being used. honestly its great lol i have on my oldest phone and i lock it it at bedtime cause she also uses it as an alarm. and at 645 it unlocks and 7am alarm goes off. if shes being a brat or not listening i can lock her phone from mine. u make a pw and in order to access anything u gotta put it in. like if its on downtime and shed wanna be sneaky and go on it shed have to unlock it by putting a pw in but unless she know it she wont be able to do it.
You parent and take the phone away. If your child can’t be trusted and/or follow thd guidelines set. You parent and take the device away.
It’s a not a necessity, it’s a want.
Take it and keep it until she’s older.
There is too much bad crap on tiktok and Facebook and everything else.
Leave her little innocence as it is.
I didn’t let my boys have access to wifi or social media apps until they were 13. And even then, they got into trouble, cuz kids like to explore.
She might get mad at you but oh well. You’re the mom. You’re suppose to be a “mean” mom, not her best friend.
Absolutely no Tiktok in my house. My fingerprint is programed into her phone, off of it at 8pm, if you have Verizon you can go online on your account and set boundaries there as well as see a call/text log for 30 days. She plays Roblox with her friends but I have the communication shut off through Roblox so she can’t message people on there. If she can’t follow the rules, take the phone. You’re teaching her that she doesn’t have to follow rules and that you are willing to change rules…
I would set some rules in place regarding deleting calls & changing the restrictions - tell her the rules are there to keep her safe online and that if she breaks them she loses her phone for 48hours (lock it away).
I would say 1hour per day is already quite a lot- I think your original suggestion of texting only was a good one. My daughter is 10 and I will not be allowing her a phone until she’s in high school.
Just so everyone is aware, with family link all the kid has to do is set up their own google account and use it on their device to get past that. They can also turn it off in their phone settings. All they need to do to get their own google account is put a fake birthday. They know how to delete their browser histories. All they need to do to find out how to get around family link or any other parental controls is simply ask google how to. Most kids by age 10 or 11 know all the ins and outs of getting past most parental controls or apps out there. To think otherwise is extremely naive. Many of them have grown up with it in their hands since babies. They likely know much more than many parents do. If not, they will have friends that do.
You are the boss of this child,take the damn thing away,she doesn’t need it at age eleven
If you go into settings under screen time then downtime you can set up personal preferences example scheduled time limits and then you can put a 4 digit lock on it.
I use family link parental controls. So far mine hasn’t figured out how to bypass it. They aren’t allowed to have devises in their rooms. No devices ok school days. It’s a rule that I get to see their device whenever I want or it’s blocked for 3 days. I scared the crap out of my daughter by having her watch a SVU episode that a boy was talking to “another boy” online which turned out to be a grown man who kidnapped him. Shes scared to talk to anyone she doesn’t know & won’t make plans unless I talk to them personally.
She’s 11 for gosh sake. YOU are the parent. STOP letting these children run YOU. Geez Stop letting these devices be babysitters. Be a parent
Very dangerous stuff could be happening. Shes too young. Take it away before youre sorry
If she is too young to follow the rules, she is too young for a phone. She doesn’t need Internet access to make emergency calls. Tic Tok and YouTube and games like BloBlox is pretty heavy content for kids and opens them up to inappropriate content and contact. Get a plan that alerts you if she goes outside of parental controls and tracks her history, my daughter has that on her kids phone. Your only job in this instance is to keep her safe.
i do not even let my 13 year old have phone in her room overnight make hw time specifically w out phone same everyday. you can see on your provider who she called even if its deleted if u catch them lying about deleted calls or messages phone is gone for a month
If my kid was deleting phone calls and or text I would take the phone away because that means she is hiding something and that could be dangerous on so meany levels, and since she is changing the settings that’s a no go for me as well and using the phone when she is not supposed to no not ok, if I was you I would just take the phone for good for awhile and get her a alarm clock and get a land line phone that she could use to talk to her friends and make her earn your trust back. But that is just what I would do, at the end of the day she is your kid and you do what you think is best, #youaredoingagoodjobmomma.
Hell no.
To young for a phone
To young to have that much freedom .
Take it away and teach responsibility …
Also no tic to/snap chat or anything like that extremely unsafe