What can I do about my ex indirectly threatening me?

Long story short, I was in a domestic abuse relationship and left it he was arrested, and we went to court multiple times for assaults on me, he was found guilty and was ordered to pay fines and do courses and a 2-year restraining order, that runs out this year. In his last attack on me, he got his friends to be his alibis, and I was arrested for perverting the course of justice and released under investigation (this was in 2018), and the police still don’t have a conclusion or update for me. He’s always writing posts, but because he doesn’t mention my name the police won’t do anything, but they are clearly directed at me, on one of these posts he says ‘you think you’ve got a great life, it’s about to get a whole lot worse’ and ‘you don’t know what’s coming’ and his mum wrote ‘wait until I see her’ But once again my name isn’t mentioned, but it’s clearly about me. He was ordered by his judge not to see our daughter. He hasn’t seen her for two for nearly three years. I had to move to another city to get away from him, but my family still lives in his city, and I visit them as they do me, and it’s leaving me scared to go see them. And worried that something bad is going to happen because of the status’s, and it’s driving me into a state of depression again. I’ve explained to the police, but they won’t do anything, what other options do I have?


Stop looking at his Facebook :woman_shrugging: block him and move on with your life.


That and don’t go to the town he’s in. Your family will just have to come visit you.


When he comes at you, shoot him.


Loose your number, go hide and don’t come out from him

Easy get a gun to carry he comes near you shoot his ass

Have you seen the movie Enough? Learn to defend yourself and child. Always be alert and document every little thing! God bless you and stay safe!


Simple, walk with pepper spray ,a gun,a knife,a shank… but make sure you know how to use it and dont punk out!!!


If you’re in a new town be sure and show local police the restraining order. Do not visit his town. Caution family not to let him know where you are.

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Install video cameras and alarm systems. Have your place ready for him. I agree with the others learn how to defend yourself. Maybe even learn how to shoot. If you’re a truly threatened for your life and your daughter’s life and nobody will help you, then you have to learn how to help yourself.


Keep fighting the problem with the laws are they can get away with it till u end up seriously hurt or dead then it’s why didn’t u do anything about record evidence defend yourself u are you’re daughter’s voice stand up and fuck the law.

Best to delete all old friends that might talk to him. If you want to remain friends with some then you will have to know they might share or mention your doings.

You have to cut all ties with him.


Get a carrying permit, a small handgun, (of course take classes) and keep it where you can get to it if you need it but somewhere your child can’t get to it


Are you in U.S.A. Sorry do not know how protection works over there, but you need a good Policeman and a Private Eye would help as well.

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If I was in this situation I would focus on yourself emotionally. As hard as it is don’t look at his status’s he’s putting them there because he knows you’ll see them and react. Ignore the messages, change your number if needed. Focus on yourself and your daughter.


Get protected. Go train and get concile and carry a gun. Get cameras for your home. So that way you and your daughter are both protected.


Leave the state and don’t tell anybody for you and your daughter’s sake

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I have had the exact same thing happen to me. You need to get the court to agree to a 5 year restraining order to not contact you and no contact through friends, not aloud with in 5 miles from your area don’t mention address as he will be given it just say area, Also contact health visitors to make a transfer to social so they can get you all the flags on your address and panic buttons as well as other help. Like schools on stand by if he goes there to pick up his child from school as they can’t stop him if he is on birth certificate. My health visitor help me and saved myself and my daughters life for all the help she gave us. Good luck to you and I pray you get all the help you need. :pray: in the mean time take screen shots of all things you think are about you even if it doesn’t have your name on. Also recorded as much as you can and send to a family member so they can keep hold of the proof rather then you and him finding out. Dates times and places.

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Can you go and get the restraining order extension. Show the court all the posts, make sure you print everything and keep in a safe place. Do not go back and see friends or relatives. If relatives come to visit tell them to make sure they aren’t followed. Definitely get a concealed carry permit. Good luck, prayers :pray: :pray::pray: :pray: coming your way

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I’d definitely look into self defense classes and Conceal carry classes. Empower yourself! Don’t allow him that control!!

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Well here’s an idea… quit looking for what he’s posting. The end. I guarentee your social media slate isn’t clean either… another brilliant idea dont go visit family right now. Have them come to you if you seriously feel threatened. I’m gathering it’s another way for you to get involved in more of the evident drama. Why are you going out of your way to make more problems. I bet the police in your area just love when you walk through the door…


How are you even getting his statues? You do realize having other people watch him, or you even watching him yourself can land you in jail right? A no contact order is literary no contact! The fact your stalking him is breaking that order. Your putting yourself at risk of being arrested again. You need to move on with your life and quit worrying about him. Seriously tho, I was arrested 4 hours after filing a no contact order, cause right after I filed. I sent a petty message saying have a nice life to my abusive ex. He turned me in right after getting his paperwork, and I fought for months to try and not go to jail. I’ll give you some advice. My mom had a no contact order and she had gone to the store with me when I was 2 years old. Her exes friends messaged him and told him she was at the store. They waited for him to show up before calling the cops. They had my mom arrested, and said she was trying to talk to him at the store, even tho she didn’t know he was even there. His friends made the alibi for him, so the police believed him. Over my mom who was clearly just trying to get us food. You need to stay as far away from him as possible. You need to stop checking in on him! You need to move on with your life, for you and your child’s sake. If you let him get to you, then your letting him win.


End all contact, social media, everything with his friends and family. There is no in between. They’ve chosen a side, and it isn’t protecting you. No contact. No visits with the family. Nothing.

Can you block his emails and/or texts? Stay away from him, his friends, his family.

Put little camera up on outside and inside of home.

Hey I understand your fear. So screw all of these ladies who apparently do not understand that fear. I know why you’re looking. You want to know what’s coming. You don’t want to be blindsided. It’s not stalking. It’s trying to stay informed. But watching his social media doesn’t let you heal. It also keeps giving him power. Which an abuser craves above anything else. The fact that years later they still live in your head rent free.

So, stay out of the town where he lives. Tell your friends and family they are absolutely NOT to give any information about your whereabouts. Keep a security system. Learn self defense. Conceal carry if you’re comfortable with it. Most importantly, take your power back. Don’t let him have it because he uses childish intimidation tactics to scare you. I guarantee you, if he’s writing that stuff, he already believes you are watching.


Where ever u put cameras dont make visible tell ur family where they are incase something happens to u and he harms yall or kidnaps u. Hell mine text and said he was headed home to put me in a straight jacket that I was not leaving him the judge had police park behind my house had him arrested when he arrived and he had a straight jacket in toolbox of his truck. Never ever underestimate someone

Stop all contact which is what the court ordered. So why are you seeing his post? Why is family or friends seeing it? He only had the power you give him and you are still giving it. Drop it all walk away. Stop with stocking him on social media. Because honestly for you to even continue to see or hear about his post is what it sounds like. Just be done with it. I wouldn’t go see family for a bit and let then come see you. I understand your scared but if you had NO contact you wouldn’t have anything to fear unless he broke the court order then he would go to jail.


Reinstate the PFA. And if need be get one against the mom too.

Keep a running journal of everything. Write as objectively as possible with dates, times, names. Then write your suspicions. Write proof, include photos when possible. But, I agree with other posts and do everything you can through the court system. Would it be possible to get an appointment with police and maybe a detective. My thinking is to keep the officials aware of his activities and your concerns. Make copies of your journal and give them to a family member just in case.

My daughter went through a similar situation. She had large binders full of information concerning the jerk. They finally wound up in court and was not jailed, but the mother took him home to another state. This was several years ago. Personally, he should have been jailed bc this guy was/is dangerous.

If it is making you depressed why are you looking at what he post, block him and ignore it. I see my son fall into this trap often and his anxiety just goes thru the roof, block it out and ignore him.

Get a gun and a concealed carry

Do not go back to that town. Let your family come to you.

For you to see his posts then you must be on his Facebook list. You should block him and his family. Still go to your family’s as you will have witnesses if he trays something. Don’t let him play mind games with you

Move to another state, change ur name

Why do you have them on social media that you’re seeing their statuses?

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You guys realize if his profile and posts are public she and anyone else can see his posts without being friends with him right?
Maybe she or someone checks on his profile to see what he’s saying and what veiled threats are on there so she can have a heads up

Buy a gun, learn how to shoot it… Don’t be another victim…