What do y’all do when you have a newborn and you have bonus kids who go to their other parents and always get sick and then bring it back home with them? The other parent never tells us when my bonus kid is sick so I don’t know until I get them back. They’re younger and don’t understand the concept of covering their mouth when they cough and not putting things like toys and pacifiers in their mouth. My baby is 4 days old and I don’t know how to keep him safe from getting sick and no one seems to care.
Accept its school time and a normal flu season
Is teaching kids cover mouth wash hands. Drum it into them.
Kids do get poorly unfortunately. Mine did in nursery still have in school. Istill remind my kids at times cover there mouth
Wash hands. I’m due to give birth in Jan but baby 6. So always had multiple and always illness, learnt be cautious but can’t bubble wrap babies and they do need be round things to strengthen there immune system to bugs. But colds wiping noses binning tissues and just washing hands. Not hovering over baby if coughing. It’s instinct to keep your baby safe though.
I didn’t have a bonus kids but I did have a newborn and a 2 yr old who was constantly sick. There’s nothing to do other than accept it and just make sure that they take vitamins and constantly remind them to wash hands. Constant reminders to cover mouth.
As it’s most likely school time
Those kids are going to cach any thing and every think
From colds , flu , headlice, chicken pox measles
It’s part of childhood
People will say it’s normal etc, but from someone who suffered from health anxiety and had their baby in child’s unit for the first few days of their life I worried constantly about this! I would ask ur partner to engage with the children’s mother and explain that you have a new baby in the home and with rsv season approaching and sickness, you have to protect the baba as their so young and vulnerable and if she could check in when they are unwell etc. just ensure good hygiene and hand washing and sanitising around the house etc.
So when your baby gets sick later you’re going to keep it away from the bonus kids right?
I have a newborn(3weeks) and my older 2 kids (5&7) go to there dads and have came back sick already. With school being here We work extra hard on hand washing here and even extra hard with the baby here. and dad works on it by him for the sake of my newborn. They aren’t the greatest at covering there mouths when they cough but in these short few weeks they know they cannot touch/hold the baby without freshly washed hands. I also got the rsv shot while pregnant to protect baby even more.
Not much to do if the other parent couldn’t keep them when they are sick .
Try to keep your baby away from them , keep everything as clean as you can, remind them to cover mouth and wash hands constantly
Just part of having kids. Keep them at a distance from the baby. Wash hands frequently and continue to teach them to cover their mouths. If you have another baby and this newborn is a toddler, same thing will happen. Nothing much you can do unfortunately
Kids are kids, especially in school a million viruses go around . Nothing you can do but teach them basic washing hands, take vitamins, and clean as you can. It’s bound to happen and that’s just life. You can have a newborn and your own kids at home, if your kids got sick are you sending them away to someone else etc ? No. Just deal with it the best you can.
All I’ve said to my almost 7 year old is elbow. She knows it means only cough, sneeze, snot whatever into your elbow. Keeps hands cleaner longer.
Find some cute kid masks and normalize everyone wearing masks around the house. Hang outside as much as possible. Have stools in the bathrooms and kitchen sinks to make it easy for your tyke to reach the faucet to wash hands. Maybe post a pictogram about the correct way to wash hands by each sink. I encouraged my granddaughters to wash their hands in the tub if they couldn’t reach the sink too. Teach coughing or sneezing into the elbow and reward doing so with an M&M when they remember.
Germs are needed and good for a newborns non existent immune system…
You treat your bonus kids and your house exactly the same as you would. With any bug. Or illness you don’t want to spread. It’s not hard
Kids get sick, it happens. Not a whole lot you can do about it. Just gotta deal with it.
Teach them to wash hands, put a hankie in their pocket, get some hand sanitiser and practice good habits.
Kids get sick and although a heads up would be nice, what difference does it make? The child is still coming home regardless. You can’t pick and chose when you want the kid around so focus on healthy habits instead of being frustrated about it.
Just do your best to keep germs at bay. You’ll never eliminate germs completely. Fact of life–kids get sick. The most important thing is to introduce your baby to their siblings and let them begin the bonding process.
A newborn will get sick about 8+ times the first 12 months of life. It builds the immune system. It’s also nothing mama is doing. She probably exposes them by taking them to ones to parks and events or out shopping etc. last year was the worst year for illness. Kids caught everything and I mean everything. Colds went on for months. Yes I mean months. Buckle up winter is coming. Wash your hands a lot and get a nose sucker, a vaporizer, Vicks, etc. Good luck Mama
This is just part of having kids. They will get sick. It’ll help their immune system develop. Don’t make your “bonus” kids feel uncomfortable in their own home
Keep in mind it takes 3 days for symptoms of a virus to start. So if your step kids are going to moms for the weekend they didn’t get sick at Mom’s. They contracted the virus while with you. The virus is already in your home.
If they’re coming home with symptoms every time they see mom it’s likely allergies. In that case they aren’t getting baby sick. Does their mom have animals? Or mold in her home etc? If this is the case talk to Mom about giving the kids an antihistamine. Then take them to the Dr to be tested.
Teach them to cover when they cough or sneeze. Young kids can learn this with reminders. Use hand sanitizer & disinfectant. Teach them not to touch baby’s things or to give them to you to be washed.
Being sick is a normal fact of life. Your baby is going to get sick eventually no matter how hard you try to prevent it. Just do your best.
Enforce regular hand washing and have the kids maintain distance from the baby while they’re sick? What would you do if you had them full time and they kept bringing cooties home from a little germ cesspool we all know as SCHOOL? I guarantee they’re bringing more germs into your home from school than from anywhere else.
Unfortunately, germs are a part of life. Ither than teaching good hygiene, there’s not much you can do. Maybe remind their Dad to speak to the mom about reinforcing the healthy hygiene at the moms. Other than that keeps lots of orange juice, kleenex and vitamins on hand. Unfortunately you can’t keep the baby in a bubble either.
Honey if they’re young they’re going to have a cough from October-April. It’s seriously a fact of life. Especially if they’re going to daycare or school.
Keep Lysol on hand and try to get them to wash hands before touching the baby.
Sick how? Colds , coughs, allergies? Or are they coming over with strep and bronchitis all of the time?
You just kinda manage the best you kind. I have a 8,7,3 and year old. When my 3 year old was a new born my daughter was in K and son is 1st grade. I would try to keep them apart when they were sick and use hand sanitizer and hand washed consistently. You just do the best you can have dad have a chat with mom. Maybe she’ll be receptive. Although it doesn’t matter too much becuse the kids are still coming whether they’re sick or not and you getting a heads up before hand is probs just going to cause anxiety
How old is the bonus child? Because at 3/4 my daughter learned about coughing into her elbow and about germs. Reminders to wash hands, blow nose, cough into elbow or to wash hands if she coughed in her hands. I wasn’t trying to keep a newborn healthy, I was honestly trying not to get sick myself at the time. My daughter was also in daycare during the COVID days so now at 6 she all about hand sanitizer and washing her hands and telling people who cough without covering about germs and making healthy choices lol
Keep baby in his own space. Tell the other child not to touch the baby things. Ask mom before the child comes over how he feeling.
Not much you can do except treat all of your kids the same and do your best to teach them good hygiene during the time they are at your house. Those are your babies siblings… Kids get sick. I’ve got 4 kids and I definitely didn’t “do” anything when my last one was born, just made sure to remind everyone about hand washing. I’m curious what would change if their mother told you they were sick before sending them home to you and their dad? Like they still would have every right to come home wouldn’t they?
I don’t think being a “bonus kid” changes anything. Kids get sick. They bring home germs. No judgement with this but do you breastfeed? I had strep and then covid myself within the first few weeks of my last as a newborn and he did not get sick at all.
Unfortunately nothing. Not sure how young but keep practicing coughing and sneezing in your elbow with them and washing hands. Germs are everywhere. If you have a healthy baby don’t be to worried it will help when they are older if you just let them be kids
I don’t have a bonus kid, but I did have a 5 year old who stayed sick (first year of school) when my now 2 year old was a newborn. You just gotta keep things as clean as you can. I realize being very early postpartum it isn’t ideal. Just remind them to cough into their elbow, blow their nose in tissue paper, and to wash their hands with soap and water.
Depends how sick. Covid or flu we switch weekends, other sickness just do normal things like keep distance wash hands relax etc
What would be the difference if they were your children and caught something from school and brought it home?
Your spouse I’m assuming works, he could be a carrier and easily bring something home just the same…
Not much to do. Once kids start school/daycare, I feel they are constantly sick and bringing things home… your newborn will be good will make a stronger immune system. I know my daughter had the chicken pox about 6 weeks after I had my son… my son never got them.
But curious to how old your bonus kids are, and what do you mean by sick… like cold/ allergy sick, or flu/fevers/bronchitis/cough… has either parent taken to Dr to find out? . Sometimes it takes a few for viruses to show up,… some sickness you are actually contagious before any symptoms show for a few days? ??
It will give your baby a good immune system so that’s good
When my son was a newborn his siblings stayed with their mom and skipped their visit for the first few weeks for this reason. I’d advise you to go stay somewhere else or come to an agreement until your baby is older, taking an infant around a sick kid is extremely dangerous because to them it’s not just a cold it’s life threatening.
I don’t understand the disconnect. Would yall ship your bio kids off until your newest is bigger? No? So why is a child being uprooted from their home (yes it’s theirs too) because the parents decided to have more kids?
If you had others kids and they were sick what would you do? They would be at home right…. Seems obvious.
All these parents saying there isn’t much you can do. You’ve obviously have never had a newborn or enfant contact any serious illnesses.
As a mother of a child who contacted RSV at a very young age, your advice is beyond unbelievable. A sick child or even an adult who is sick should stay away from an infant especially as young as 4 days old. Its unbelievable that people would risk a serious illness. Dad can go visit/take said child out but until the baby was a bit older, nobody sick would be coming in contact with the baby.
Look up RSV…then tell me you would not, not change your advice.
You deal with sickness and teach the other child the best you can to cover their mouth etc gotta remind em every time they cough. Make sure they wash their hands and no kissing baby when sick.
Other then that you can’t do much, sickness is a thing apecailly this time of year
So if they were your older kids getting sick and not “bonus” kids would you kick them outta the house?
It’s hard but I always looked at it as, if my kid was sick I wouldn’t ship her off so I can’t just not let my steps come over. Kids in school are always sick and we don’t keep them out of school. Do your best to get them to cover mouth and stay away from baby a little more than normal. Also, not that you want a sick baby, but keeping them in a bubble will be hell later especially when they start school.
Stop saying your bonus kid for one lol.
Well what if you had older siblings to your baby that were yours? Not “bonus” kids. What would you be doing with your older children to keep your baby from getting sick? Do the same things. Try to keep the sick kids away from the baby until they feel better. Give the kids toys you can sanitize at the end of the day and teach them that they are not to go searching for the baby’s pacifier and put them out of reach of the kiddos. FREQUENT Handwashing!! That’s the best way to eliminate all the germs. But kids get sick, this will happen every season change and again, if they were your kids and didn’t have another household to go to, what would you do?
Your baby can not be protected from sickness and germs. Kids get sick.
Just sanitize toys after they cough/sneeze on them or put them in their mouth. Tell them not to breathe in baby’s face.
Your husband leaves to work right? He can bring sickness home. Are you making him sleep outside so he won’t get baby sick?
Didn’t think so.
This really doesn’t sound like scared of your baby getting sick and more sounds like resentment towards the step kids for some reason.
Kids get sick. If you didn’t know that by now… well.
Breastfeed, that will make the biggest difference
There’s nothing to do. If they weren’t bonus babies then they’d live with you full time and you’d be dealing with it anyway.
I can’t get over the amount of step mums happy to banish their husbands other kids to “protect “ their new child. It’s a massive red flag!
Babies don’t need germ free environments and it’s not good for them. Siblings especially that don’t live together full time need to bond and feel included not pushed to the side when it suits!!!
Also if your husband is happy to do this that’s a red flag because what he ll do with you he ll do to you so if you guys split prepare for him to treat your kids the same way!!!
Bonus kids? I’ve heard of a bonus room in a home but never a bonus kid.
Baby is 4 days old. Keep baby away from sibling, keep babys bink bottle etc out of reach… it’s simple. Step babe is still your child, regardless of being sick or not
Teach them yourself about germs. Show them a few videos.
Lucky your bonus kids only bring sickness. My bonus kid brings bedbugs, lice as well as sickness. We are going for full custody now bc it’s cost me thousands of dollars and endless days of treating and cleaning for all the bugs.
I’d suggest zicam and vitamins for yourself and all the kids when the bonus child comes over.
Start teaching them girl. teach them to wash their hands start giving them elderberry gummies every morning and in the evening
My kids were sick when I had my newborn and I kept them at a distance from the baby and sprayed Lysol before putting my baby in a room that their older sibilings were in.
Just because the child is not biologically yours doesn’t mean they just don’t come around while they’re sick. It’d be just like if you had another child, you can’t just ship them off somewhere so no one else gets sick. Imagine your child not allowed to see his dad cause he has a cold and his gf/wife doesn’t want to get their new baby sick…
Sometimes putting yourself in others shoes can really ground you.
You can’t raise your baby in a bubble . Will they go to school ? Or daycare ? Or church ? Just tell the kids to wash their hands and if they are running a fever send them back to mom .
What would you do if they the kids were your biological kids? Do that! Maybe get take the kids to the Drs? Ask their father or mother to take them. Get them vitamins. And keep newborn in their room u til the kids leave. Not like the newborn does much anyway
You treat the situation like you would if they were all your bio kids living in your home. Clean, separate, teach.
Don’t panic. I understand when baby is so young and delicate, it can be very scary to think of them getting an illness, even minor illness. All you can do really it practise good hygiene with the child. Buy some dettol spray or milton spray and spray anything child uses before and after it’s used. Also buy these soaps, they sing whilst washing hands so it’s a good way to make hand washing fun. Buy some dettol for the bath and bathe child in dettol. Don’t keep the child from baby as they may begin to feel pushed out. Hope this helps
It sounds like you’re imparting blame where it doesn’t belong and have resentment issues with the ex AND your husbands children.
That they are ’ bonus ’ children ’ is irrelevant. If they were ’ yours’ you’d be going through the same thing.
Young kids are walking petrie dishes of germs and seasonal illness they could easily have picked up at school on friday that they aren’t symptomatic with until Sunday night.
Speak with your pediatrician on how to best handle illnesses within the household in regards to infant exposures in addition to encouraging symptomatic kids to be mindful around infant ( kissing , hugging, coughing /sneezing near, covering mouth, wash hands frequently) & up the ante in hygiene and clean, clean, clean surfaces in the home.
That’s what happens when you have siblings that’s completely normal. You just teach them to cover their cough, wash hands often and. Kt touch or hold the baby when they’re sick.
As sad as it is scary my kids got my two week old sick and my pediatrician said ‘think of it as building her immunities!’
She rarely got sick during her school years and is truly one of the healthiest person I know.
What would you do if it wasn’t your “bonus child” but your biological child? You can’t bubble wrap your babies even if you wish you could… minimize their close contact, wash hands frequently… that’s about it.
Newborns are okay to be around sick it’s good for the immune system I’m not saying it’s what I think it’s what 2 doctors and a pediatrician told me when I brought my 1 week old baby home and her dad 3 sister’s & 4 brothers had strep throat and flu A. Luckily my sister baby-sat my baby the first night she was home my neighbor who is family watched her the second night. Had no choice to pick her up the next day for her 2 day check up. By day 3 everyone was getting over being sick and both baby and I did not get sick. I guess it depends how well the house is sanitized and well the kids were sick enough to not want to be around the baby. But it’s going to happen either way you have more 1 kid and they will all most likely end up sick I have 7 kids and not all of them get sick when one does…
Your baby will be fine . It’s natural and that’s how they build a good strong immune system!