What do you do when your kids don’t want to go to school because they’re “sick.” She acts so sick in the morning and then 30 minutes after I called into school and work she’s fine and jumping off the walls but still refuses to go to school? I can’t just drag her in screaming and crying can I? I only have so many sick days and I hardly make my hours to begin with to keep my insurance so we really can’t afford to just stay home. I’m all for mental health sick days but we literally just had a 4 day weekend.
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I always tell my kids “if you’re able to muck around, you’re able to go to school.” That means I have dropped them off to school 2 hours after I called the school
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We’ve had the same problem I think it’s mostly anxiety about going but school is such a different place anymore it’s got to be scary… I can’t imagine shooting drills as being normal and what goes through the kids minds 
among all the regular stresses. We’re looking into home schooling at the moment
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Oh I’d be dragging them… kicking and screaming 
you’re setting a really bad life example by letting them stay home constantly.
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I talked to my kids to make sure nothing is going on at school that is making them not want to go. Maybe they are being bullied etc
Maybe they have general anxiety, therapy may be a good thing to try just to make sure there isn’t a deeper issue.
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You sit down and ask them what’s going on. Something at school usually triggers them to play “sick” when they’re not. Maybe she feels like she doesn’t get to spend time with you and she knows you’ll stay home if she fakes being sick. Also tell her the story of the boy who cried wolf and explain what she is doing is the same but with sickness.
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probably anxiety. I liked school however I always felt the same way. whether it’s school work or social anxiety was always something.
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They stay home and don’t get a minute of rest. They clean. And then clean some more. Then clean more. Same deal if they don’t wanna go outside and play when it’s nice out. Being a parent is hard work!
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You put her in the car and take her. Then you talk to the teacher. Do not go pick her up til regular time. Who is in charge?
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I have anxiety, but I also have wonky cortisol levels so when I wake up, I feel like I was hit by a car. Nauseous, cramps, chest pain, like I ran a marathon in my sleep. It always passes about 45 mins after I wake up.
Something to consider. Super common with anxiety disorders.
Who’s the parent? You don’t give her a choice. They can come after you if she misses too much school. If she says that she’s sick and then is ok after you call in sick for her you match her 
to school. Do it as many times as it takes. She will keep doing this as long as you let. And when she is ever really sick you won’t believe her.( the little boy who called wolf).
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You can drag her into school. And eventually they will hand you a fine and cps gets involved to see if you are a good parent.
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Bring her to school, go to the office. She might be having problems.
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My daughter’s only 6 but I always just say it’s illegal for her not to go to school. That Mommy will get in trouble. That usually does the trick. It’s rare also that she doesn’t wanna go
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You’re sick? You stay in bed. No TV, no electronics, only water to drink and we are definitely not having a play day. You don’t say how old she is. But giving her a day off is rewarding negative behavior. If you don’t have a fever you get your ass to school.
Mine liked school but as she has gotten older she has asked to stay home “sick.” I said ok. No tv, no phone, no nothing. Just lay in your room. As a little I would say, if you still feel sick after lunch go to the health office and they can call me. Usually by then the nerves have settled
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My 4 eldest kids are like this always and they always come home sick even though they aren’t sick they hate school
Make her go and tell her if she’s really sick the nurse will send her home.
If you’re so sick the nurse will send you home. They learn they can’t manipulate you.
My mon always made me stay in bed and eat soup and I had to take ibuprofen or Tylenol (I hated medicine). No toys, no games, no going outside. If I was sick enough to be out of school, I was too sick to be running around.
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Make sure everything is OK at school. Bully’s? etc . Try to get to know her teacher’s. School atmosphere etc. Everything could be great but home is better. As much as you can make sure your presence is noticed. As she grows and makes good ,true friends things will probably change.
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When I see my kids are not running a fever nor have a runny tummy I’d send them to school if they really sick then the school will send them to the nurse then call me to collect the kid. But sometimes I will agree to keep them home when they say they don’t feel to go to school because I believe that a child that’s not feeling productive will not learn anything and that’s waisting my time as well as the educators time so have a talk with your kids before stressing yourself.
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It’s either anxiety or she’s being bullied or it’s her teacher. Ask her for the truth and tell her you aren’t mad at her you just want the truth so you can help her
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She’s got you buffaloed.Unless she is running a serious fever ,Next time she does this,make her life a living hell.Put away all electronics including remotes to TV,change wifi password,take away phone.No friends over. She might be contagious.She doesn’t leave the house same reason.Not just for the day ,the whole week. Fill her days with chores.Attitude?add a day.Refusal to do chore add a day. Tough love mama,get one step ahead.
Mine know if their too sick to go to school, their too sick for snacks, soda, video games, phones, WiFi access, etc.
If they’re legitimately sick enough to be home from school, they get to come to my office (I work from home) and spend the day resting on the couch in my office to get well. They can rest, sleep, read or work on assignments they’re missing from being out sick. And that is all they are allowed to do.
And yes - you drag her in kicking and screaming if there’s no reason for her to be home. You are her parent- not her friend. My 17 and 15 year old boys are bigger than me, by a lot, and they know better than to “refuse” to go to school. They’re both easily a foot taller than me and have at least 75 lbs on me. And if they tried to refuse school, they know I’d be dragging them into that building by their ear or chasing them swinging a broomstick at their behinds!
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She’s playing you. Don’t give her attention for it and just create a routine for your morning.
Mine sometimes ask to stay home when they’re not sick. I reward them if they go without a fuss all week they can pick a treat or small toy when I get groceries on Fridays.
When my kids are home from school they can’t leave their beds. No YouTube or fun games. They can sit quietly in bed playing prodigy or other educational apps. My middle schooler has to follow the school day on her Chromebook & do her assignments. They get crackers, dry toast stuff like that to eat. Nothing good 
. When they come downstairs or caught playing I send them back to their room. Basically you’re too sick for school you’re too sick to do anything. Even after school hours. After all of you’re sick you’re sick after school too. They don’t want to be home bored out of their mind all day. They go to school.
Yes I’d take her to school crying. It’s one thing to cry at home with mom. It’s another to cry in front of all your peers. As soon as you leave & the kids are staring at her she’ll stop. Apologize to the teacher & leave.
Explain to her if she doesn’t go to school you can’t work & that means you can’t buy food & toys. She may not get it. But eventually she will.
My daughter started this a couple of years ago and come to find out it was due to anxiety caused by bullying or other things like not understanding class work which overwhelmed her. Sit down with her and see what’s really going on and go from there.
Unless the kids in my family had fever, or active vomiting/ diarrhea, we went. It was more “fun” to go than to stay home.
Some of y’all seem like no one has ever asked you if you were okay and it makes me sad to see the comments on this post. I don’t see any harm in a child watching tv just because they didn’t go to school. They’re not being punished for being sick right?
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Your child has learned that they can fake sick and get to stay home. And if that means seeming like the bad guy then that’s what you need to do. If they want to stay home it’s in bed sleeping or just laying there. No toys not tv nothing. If they don’t wanna lay there then up and cleaning it is.
I had to do that. My daughter would literally vomit on the way to school daily. Eventually, with consistancy… she loved it. Still does.
My daughter is the same. Deff anxiety for her. She’s begging me to pull her out and homeschool her every day. She’s 9. It only gets worse each yr for her so I have to weigh some things out. I also tell her “you only have x amount of sick cards each month. Use them wisely”
Have you tried finding out why she doesn’t want to go? Is the work too hard? Is someone bothering her? Does she not get along well with her teacher? Does she play alone at recess?
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As a former teacher, my first thought is have you asked her why she doesn’t want to go and listened (including reading between the lines!} to what she says? Its highly likely there is a simple reason for it. The transition from home with Mum to being in a class and building full of strangers - other kids and adults - and doing new stuff is hard for some kids and they take a while to settle in. Sometimes it’s a bigger thing - my daughter was a school refuser for years. She has a very high IQ and got her exams anyway, but through her own efforts not the school’s. At first it was being bullied and picked on by the teacher. She couldn’t sit still and focus and the teacher thought it was deliberate. Later it was being bullied by the kids because she didn’t fit in. At secondary school it was the noise when classes changed over. The reasons were ADHD and autism, but it was only picked up when she went to University. I’m not suggesting your daughter’s reason is the same, but there is always a reason.
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Maybe there’s something going on at school that they don’t wanna talk about like someone bullying them really bad. I’m having this problem with my 11 year old daughter
You be the adult and make them go. When I tried to pull this, my mom made sure I only laid in bed. No tv or anything. Because if I’m “sick” I should be resting.
Allow this now, it will only get worse. Take her to school and tell her if she doesn’t feel good in 2 hours go to the nurse. If she’s sick they will call if not they will take care of it ( they’re supposed to) - remember the attendance of school will set the pattern for attendance in the work place.
After reading these comments and dealing with my own situation does people not wonder why all these kids are scared and crying to go to school? It’s very concerning to me.
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Angela Camfield read some of these comments
Anxiety can present with physical symptoms. Gotta get to the root of the problem. Also if she just doesn’t want to go, she should stay in bed. No fun stuff no screen time. Gentle foods. After awhile that’ll get boring.
If you have to you DRAG the little angel to school confront her with the teacher and have the little angel tell both you and the teacher at the same time why she doesn’t want to go to school. Then together while you are all still together resolved the problem.
You take her regardless. Screaming kicking whatever. She goes to school.
Yes you can in fact take kids to school kicking and screaming. I most certainly have. However if this is a repeating issue you need to find out why your child is not wanting to go.
Find out what’s really wrong. Bullying ?? Or something else.
If I can tell that they really are sick, I keep them home. Then they stay in bed or laying on the couch, no electronics.
If I think they are fibbing, I send them to school and say if they really aren’t feeling well after an hour or two, go to the nurse and see what they think. I’ve rarely been called to pick them up. Sometimes they’re just having a sluggish morning and I get that but they just need to wake up a bit
Well most schools don’t care if you kid is sick and if you miss a certain amount of days, they will start sending you letters telling you they will have you arrested for not sending the kids. So yes, you can drag your kid in kicking and crying.
Hmm talk to her. Why is she dislinking school? Is the teacher mean to her? Is someone being mean to her? Are the classes hard and she feels confused or embarrassed when she can’t do it? Does she perhaps have no friends? There has to be a reason as to why a child suddenly doesn’t like school. But ultimately you don’t have to ask the kid for permission. If there is no fever and no one is vomiting, out the door you go.