What is the right thing to do?

Hi, my stepdad passed away unexpectedly two years ago. My brother pretty much got what he wanted from the house and got his boat. He didn’t have a will. Now he sold his boat and is putting in a pool at his house. And my mom is still living. I think he should give the money to my mom and not use it for himself just because he claimed the boat. What do you think?


Your mom let him take the boat… it’s his to do with as he pleases and he chose to sell it. Can’t ask for the money back now. :woman_shrugging:t3:


If it was his boat, it’s his money to use as he pleases.


Morally yes he should at least take care of her with some of it


I would stay out of it. None of this affects you directly.


Family eh let them decide but your right

I think it’s none of your business :woman_shrugging:


Sadly it was given to him, he chose to sale it, whether anyone agrees or if it was right, it was his decision to make. He keeps the $ and gets the pool.


I don’t know your family or the bond your brother had with your father. I do know when someone passes away and gifts in a will are given. When this happens they obviously obtain legal right to the property. Technically he can do whatever he wants with the boat the money the house. That’s what your father left behind for him and that’s what he is using to build himself a nice cozy life with. Maybe embrace it and be proud he turned dads boat into something everyone can enjoy.

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I wonder what your stepdad would want him to do. Hmm. No possession of a family member is worth fighting over when they die. No will tells me that dad lives and trusted everyone in the family enough to think this sort of thing would never be an issue.

Once you inherit an asset, and take possession of it, it’s yours to do with whatever you’d like. Let him enjoy his boat-turned-into-pool-now. Be happy for him that he has something he can remember his dad by.

Your mother as his widow is automatically in title to all his property …unless contested in court …talk to your mother about your feelings .there is no such thing as a relative claiming something as theirs


She let him take the boat. The boat and any money from it is his


Sounds petty. Let it go. No use stressing over things that dont matter


I don’t really think it’s your place to say what he should or shouldn’t do. She didn’t fight him about it so I think you need to just let it go


I feel like morally if he wasnt going to keep it, he shouldnt have taken it. Your mom let him take it so its his to do whatever. No matter how we feel about it


There’s only one thing I want after my dad dies and it just an ore that he painted with a scene of a ship on stormy waters with a lighthouse on a cliff. My mom and siblings can have the rest.

My fiance is dealing with this right now his ex mother in law sold a boat of her husband’s (whom had passed) she said the husband would have wanted him to have it but they needed/wanted something bigger and the MIL gave him the money for the boat. Now they are divorced and his ex wants him to pay back the money to her mom because it was suddenly a loan.

A gift is a gift… If he was given the boat and he’s choosing to sell it it’s his money. Sorry.

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Your brother sounds like a POS if he didn’t give her the money he never will.

If everyone agreed that he could have the boat then it’s was his to sell and the money should be his.


I wouldn’t ask for opinion on this page or any people have nothing right or nice to say. I hope our kids show how fucking pathetic these adults are. So sad

Your mom can shut it down if she wants

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that’s between your brother and your mom. She allows him to treat her this way, doesn’t matter what you think


The boat was given to him so why should he share

I dont understand why your brother took the stuff in the first place if your mother is still alive. All that belongs to her, unless she willingly said he could have it. Then the money is his to do what he wants i guess :woman_shrugging:


It’s his to do as he pleases

Mom should have saitoo late about boat. She was married to man and when he died possessions are here. He’s not to take anything unless ok with herd who gets what.

Sad that siblings get jealous and fight for a dead person’s belongings

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If the boat is his and he sells it anything from that boat he gets is his he can do whatever he pleases with it same as if you would have gotten the boat.

Was ur mom married legally because that’s the only way she can supersede anything

If mom isn’t concerned, let it go, when people pass, there are always outsiders who have there opinions about what should go where, almost all of the time, those people have nothing to do with it, it will just stir up drama

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I think it’s not your business

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Let it go, let it go, it won’t do you any good,

Gee I hear all these comments and I am flabbergasted by many who oppose the mother. How do you know she is mentally capable to deal with the greedy son? Have gone through similar situation. My brother in law and his wife literally stole my mother in law blind. They wrote fraudulent cheques, took money out etc from an old lady who was ill. We just did not have the resources to fight them so we let it go. When she died there was nothing left. From a substantial inheritance my husband got a box of odds and ends.

Your mom let him take what he wanted, including the boat. It’s his and he can do what he wants with it.
It’s just like if you took his car, and decided to upgrade it, would you be ok with him demanding you to share it with him? No it’s your property, just like the boat was his property.

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If your mom let him have the boat, then it’s his money. It sounds like your more up set about it then your mother is.
I think that if your mother has a problem then she can take it up with him. But from what I’m getting from your story it doesn’t sound like she does. Leave things alone. There’s no point in steering the pot for nothing. Minded your business.
If and when she asks for your help or option then that’s a different story, but if dosen’t sound like she has.

If your mom let your brother have the boat which is what she did if there wasn’t a will … then no it’s his boat now and his money to do as he pleases with …
my husbands father died in November. Prior to his death he brought his four wheeler to our house for my husband to tweak a few things on it and never came back for it stating he was too sick to ride it and knew we would be able too … the other day we were told by his mother it was hers and she wanted it back … no will nothing we can do about it. My husband got nothing of his fathers


I think the right thing to do is, and I’m sorry for being brash, mind your business. It’s not your circus or your monkeys and your opinion doesn’t count. It was his choice to not have a will prepared and it was your mothers responsibility to handle his estate (if they were married). if they weren’t married and your brother was his son, that makes him the sole heir. With or without a will.


If the boat is his, then he gets to do what he wants with it… If he was borrowing it then that’s a different story. Y’all gave your brother the boat then you can’t take it back, which is basically what you’re wanting to do by asking for the money


Ok ok it does NOT say in any way tat the mother Let her son take the boat so we will work on as the post states her brother CLAIMED it and it was his step father not father, perhaps his mum was too distressed at the time to worry about her son claiming the boat as his ? Her daughter would have that insight we won’t, the STEP DAD didn’t have a will and it comes across in the POST the son CLAIMED the boat as HIS and took it at a very vulnerable time in his mums life . Her daughter thinks it the right thing to do to give the money from the sale of the boat to support her financially rather than her son buy a swimming pool with it , I say good on her daughter for looking out for mums best interest so I’m going to say son should gift that money back to his mum.


If they were still married, assets go to spouse. If they weren’t married, assets MUST be liquidated and split evenly between the heirs, if there is more than one. Just went through that with my Dad who passed without a will in 2018. Have mom check with your local probate court!

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I think it comes down to the length of their marriage and did she help establish the assets. If your mother married him later in life, then the son may not feel obligated to give your mother the money. (Understandable)
If they were married since you guys were teens or during your adolescent years then the argument would have merit.
Your stepfather not having a will is an asinine point. It doesn’t mean he didn’t want your mother to be cared for, he simply thought like most people and assumed he had time.

Ultimately it’s to late. It’s been two years. Plus your mother should have evoked privilege as soon as he passed.

If you mother was married to him and he passed. How did your brother take the boat register the boat without your moms permission. I would think that all of your dads things would be your moms upon passing. So if that’s the case your brother falsely registered the boat in his name and could be taking to court.

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It’s his boat. He can do what he wants with the money. Bummer your stepdad didn’t have a will. It makes things like this so difficult.


Is your mom in need of the money? Is she struggling or homeless? If not if she was married to him then she could have kept everything if there was no will. If she let him take what he wanted and he chose the boat, its his boat to do as he pleases


All assets go to the current living spouse. It would then be up to your mom to distribute funds as she sees fit.

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I’d sit this one out. If mom is really in need of money, try to help her somehow. Don’t make an already difficult situation worse.

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If he already claimed the boat 2 years ago and your mom let him, nothing to do about it now. I would let it go.

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The boat didn,t belong to him it belonged to your mom if she let him take it and didn,t do anything to stop him she has more or less gave it to him. If He sales it its his money.

It not worth getting upset about life is too short let it go move on :heart:

If there’s no will. Normally everything goes to the wife.


Your mom let him have what he got.

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Make sure your mom has a will

I think if you’re mom isn’t saying anything about it you shouldn’t pay any mind to it. Because while you think your mom wants/needs the money I’m pretty sure she’s more worried about spending time with you and your brother. Which she can do.

You don’t know the conversations between your brother & mother. The pool will add value to the property & maybe your mom will enjoy it.
Here’s an idea- how about the whole family enjoy the pool with each other???

If everyone was ok with him claiming the boat then whatever he does with it is his business. Was him getting the boat the issue or making money off the boat because I am assuming your mother knew he took the boat if he sold it.

Stepdad could have set it up like that. But he didnt. People cant fight over a dead persons money. If they wanted someone to have it, it would have been specified. Too bad

If your mom didnt want him having the boat she should’ve fought for it when her husband died. You cant ask for money for it now, it’s his.

Deaths are always messy. But if he got the boat and no one disputed it then its now his property and his business what he does and doesn’t do with it including selling it and using the money for whatever he wants. It doesn’t matter what your mom did got or didn’t get in her husband’s passing. I thought wives were entitled to everything until I found out different when putting my name on my husbands bank account. There’s so many rules, but anyway, it’s his, no matter what anyone feels at this moment.

Once the boat became property of your brothers, it’s his decision what he does with it. If he decides to sell it, then he gets to keep the money. You dont get to wait 2 years before deciding it isnt fair and needs to be shared.

He got the boat, so he can do with it as he pleases, the money he got from it, he should be able to do as he pleases. Technically it is a fair trade

In Louisiana when a spouse dies and they have kids it’s supposed to go to the living spouse and a succession is opened to split everything if there is no will.My sisters just went thru this. I think every family situation is different though and there may be something that u dont know

He was able to take the boat he can sell it if he wants and he gets to keep the money since he allowed to have the boat. Now the right thing to do was let a relative buy it if they are able to if someone else really wanted it as well

Stay out of it unless she asks you or expresses that she doesn’t want it. Here everything would have passed to the surviving spouse and minor children.

I think it’s not your business. That’s between your brother and your mom.


I think if it became him boat, it’s him money. If he fairly got the boat

Technically if they didn’t have a prenup it all belongs to her unless left in writing to someone else

I would say he did what he did with the boat. Leave it at that. Ur mom has a voice if she had a problem let her address it with him. Dont add fuel to an already hard situation


At the end of the day, it’s your moms worry. Family matters always end up involving everyone but I would support what my mom would want.

Family disputes, a lifetime problem, money, house, you name it, best is to work for What’s yours.

Not your place to say out of your hands has nothing to do with you he got what he glt and its his call to do what he wants


Do I agree yes not his all should belong to his wife until she passes it along

He claimed the boat it’s his decision to with it what he wants. Not your concern

If he’s your Step brother he’s your “step dads” next of kin and really speaking your brother is who has the say.

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If it was his then whatever he does with it is choice.

Nothing should have gone to anyone only the living spouse

If it didn’t go to probate, he owns nothing.

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Technically since they had no children no will then you have no rights he was nothing but a marriage

Your brother can’t legally go into your step father’s house & take whatever he wants. Your mom must’ve let him. She could’ve pressed charges for theft if he just took things. Since your mom allowed it unfortunately nothing can be done about the sale now.

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If your mom let him have it then it now belongs to him. He can do with it what he wants. While it may be nice of him to offer her the money it is ultimately his choice. What happens is really between them. You could mention to your brother that you think it would be nice of him to offer her the money but really it is none of your business.

It’s non of your business. This is between your mother and brother

Learn the facts first. Jealousy is a mean disease.