I have been in a relationship for 2 almost 3 years now I have a son and a newborn daughter and a stepdaughter although we’re not married but anyways I thought our relationship was going good never once did I ever questioned anything until about 5 months ago when I was still currently pregnant I was six and a half months along at this time I felt something was wrong so I decided to do a little snooping and come to find out my fiance has been chatting with other girls practically since the very beginning of our relationship all the way up until the point that I caught him he was saying he wanted to meet wanted his d" sucked or do you wanted to meet up for sex kind of things to these girls messaging them and chatting with them through a Text Now app and also had a email and a Facebook account under another guy’s name that he also used to communicate with these girls and he was on numerous dating sites as well chatting with other women according to him he’s never met up with any of them for anything physical it’s just chat and he doesn’t even know why he did it kind of thing but the way he was talking to these girls about meeting up sounds to me like he probably already has cheated physically he just don’t want to admit that part so he just says he just like to look at escort Pages just cuz he just like to look at it or he was just chatting with these girls just to chat with them but anyways finding this out when I was pregnant with our daughter just broke my heart and honestly I thought our family life was good we have sex all the time so I really didn’t think that anything was wrong and not once did I ever question him until I found all of that on his phone well anyways he told me he would stop he wanted to change he loved me and her family and that after I gave birth to our daughter that he love me even more but now I came to find out he’s still been going to escort pages and still has a different Snapchat and everything else so now I have two kids and he’s the one who pays for the majority for the house so I’m going to be pretty much left with nothing and I am scared that I am not going to have anywhere to go with two kids what do you guys think I should do about this should I just leave and not look back get a job and move out should I have him do a lie detector test to prove he hasn’t ever done anything physical during our relationship or do you guys think the sneakiness of him practically doing this our whole entire relationship is enough to just end things and move on because otherwise he would just think that he can just get away with it and keep breaking my heart and I don’t want to waste more time for me or the kids but the kids will be devastated because my son is 3 and my stepdaughters 4 they’ve become really close with each other and I think in the end the kids will be the ones hurt the most please no harsh comments I just want some advice! What do you ladies think or have you guys delt with this same situation?
Get away from this asap. This drama can cause lasting mental issues for you trust me on this. You deserve better than this
Dump him. I was in ur shoes, just dump him.
Leave… sorry but that wont change
If this were me then I would leave as the trust has been broken and the fact he has been going from the beginning of the relationship isn’t right, you deserve a better life for you and the kids will learn to adapt in time,
Listen the reason he didn’t get sucked off was because noone was game. That is what those sites are for id be done. It doesn’t get better from here
L.E.A.V.E. He sounds like he may have a sex addiction. Which if that’s the case you or the next person will NEVER be enough to fill his lustful appetite.
This is going to be a hated opinion… but I mean right now I’d do what’s best for the kids. If you don’t have anywhere to go, I’d go ahead get a job, get my things in order before just leaving… this is just me but I wouldn’t want to be homeless with my babies…
If your going to stay I would become swingers, he already seems to want an open relationship
Honey the fact you’re even asking other people what to do, should tell you to GET OUT. HE DOESNT LOVE YOU IF HE WAS TRYING TO GET IT SOMEWHERE ELSE. PERIOD!
The ONLY reason he probably hasn’t is Bc the other females could see thru his bullshit & didn’t want to suck his dick. Or he has & just wants to do Hoe things. But that’s not a family man. You’re either gonna be on your own now or you’re gonna be on your own in a year while pregnant with another kid Bc y’all think that will fix it 
Sounds like my ex husband. Personal experience, they don’t change and I’m still pretty messed up from it all. It’s tough being a single mom but I’m much better off now than I would have been if I had stayed. You deserve better.
Why are you even asking for opinions? Are you trying to find a reason to stay with him?
A toxic relationship will only damage you and your children.
He was already caught and carried on. Cut and run.
Leave especially while the kids are small… Hes gonna cheat always js
This is another reason why u never let someone “give you everything”…you THINK you can never leave.
Pack up ur stuff and leave. He is not worth it. Would you want your daughter in the same kind of crappy relationship?
Your kids are going to grow up by the examples you set for them. What advice would you give your children in this situation? You know you deserve better. Leave.
LEAVE HIS NASTY ASS!!! I consider that cheating, and he will not change!!! Been there, done that, heard it all.
Physical or not it’s disrespectful to you, especially after he got caught out once and still chose to continue. I’d leave him.
Doesn’t need to be physical to be classed as cheating his clearly disrespectful and someone don’t look up escort pages just for the sake of it
No one can tell you to leave or stay. What does you heart tell you to do! You have to do what is best for you and your babies!
He has proven that he’s not going to stop any of it.
Take your babies and leave, he isn’t worth it
Trust is everything. If you don’t have trust, you won’t have a good relationship. Literally: TRUST = RELATIONSHIP.
You will drive yourself mad if there’s no trust.
This is hog shit, Get rid of him You know what to do
You need to leave you honestly deserve better even your kids.
#1 quit having kids. From personal experience, he’ll never change. I was in a relationship for 18 years, thinking he would change and he never did. I left because I wasn’t going to put up with the other women. I let him get by with it the first couple of times and he thought he could keep on doing it and I would forgive him. Don’t waste another day on him
First, I just want to say I’m sorry you just had a baby and you have to feel that pain. Second, I think you could try couples counseling or give him an ultimatum. I truly understand the feeling of being stuck or having nothing if you leave. Stay with some family or if not you can do it. It took me 3 days to get a job find someone yo watch the kids and a line on a place to stay. I stayed for years because I thought I couldn’t.
I think the better question would have to be, how much do you respect yourself?
Do you respect yourself so little that you would allow him to do this to you, and forfeit an idea of healthy and safe love?
Or do you respect yourself enough to lace up your boot straps and do what you need to do for your kids?
Nobody deserves to see their mom go through that, bio dad or not. You deserve to be actually happy. And you CAN do it by yourself. There are agencies set up to help single moms not only secure financial help, but they will help you find a home, find daycare, get you loans, etc. You are NEVER stuck with someone.
It will be hard, but you’ll be happy when it’s done. He is so not worth it /=
I know someone that added something to her husband’s computer that copied everything no matter who logged on, it copied the text. I don’t know if this is possible to add on a phone but worth looking into, it saved her a lot by getting to the truth.
Leave. Yes it’s going to be hard. I was in the same position 3 years ago. Constantly talking to other women, sending inappropriate photos, also still won’t admit to physically cheating. It will NEVER change. I spent 6yrs of my life hoping it would. He paid for everything, I raised our daughter. I was terrified when I finally got up and left. It was hard, I was broke. But 3 years later, all the hard was worth it. I have my own place, I pay my own bills, I’m not constantly worrying if I’m being cheated on, my daughters a lot happier. The good always out weighs the bad in my situation. Don’t waste anymore time, you deserve to be happy too.
Make a plan but don’t feel like you need to burn it all down at once. You know what is best for you and your babies. Get a job, save some money and get a counselor. You tube has many great free therapy informative videos! You know the truth now!
Cheating isn’t always physical, what he is doing is emotional cheating I just left my partner of 9 years with 3 children to him , he emotionally cheated our whole relationship, I stayed because I believed he would change but he never did , he just got better at hiding it , he did the same thing to me as yours did , its up to you to decide if you want to leave but believe me nothing will ever change
It WILL be hard but you CAN do it you have to leave you and your children deserve better PLEASE don’t believe his lies that he will change/stop please please please leave!!
He would be out the door as soon I found out he was chatting up other women and trying to meet them
No more babies with this guy. Get yourself and your kids as a priority. You aren’t married. No real commitment you can leave. I’d go. Chances are he’s already got people who will or have already filled your role. He’s going to lie because he’s never had to be accountable. You deserve better. Don’t say oh my kids need a Dad because whether your right there or down the street he can still step up and be a Dad. The difference is you don’t have to be lied to and used and mistreated. Kids and pregnancy have never kept a man faithful or decent. So I m sorry you got used like that. You need to leave. Start looking for your own place and a job and daycare. Good luck!
I’m so sorry your going through this. These type of situations change us. Everytime his phone makes a noise from here on out your mind will be triggered. The fear of the future as a single mom may be hard but s tortured mind is worse! Sending you so much love and positive in these super difficult times!
He cheated, whether it was physical or not. Do not try to find a reason to forgive him just because he is the father of your kids. You did nothing wrong. And you are a strong ass woman and mother and can do anything you want and succeed at it. Remember that girl! You are worth so much more than that and one day you will thank yourself for sure for walking away. And he can still be in the kids lives and you be separated and happy. Also try to remember that. You will hurt, but in a while you will be okay and you can do this if you want to. Stay strong and I’m rooting for you. 
Him talking to girls like that IS cheating. It doesn’t have to be physical. Sounds to me that you know what you should do. Single moms are some of the strongest human beings I know. You don’t need a boy (because that’s what he is). It’s going to be hard, but you will find a way to do it on your own
Leave. Ive been doing it alone with 4 kids for the last 8 months (we broke up when i was pregnant). Honestly, its easier without him. We have a schedule, no fighting or chaos, everyone is happier. You can do it and youre worth so much more than that.
Once a cheater always a cheater, been there. I left with my Don who was not 2 yet and never looked back. I was lucky enough to find a wonderful man and we were married over 42 years until his passing. The ex he is on
Wife #5
If you can stomach it long enough, get a job, put your money away and get out. He’ll never change, you only have one life and deserve happiness.
Like I’m curious on the lie detector part:thinking: how is that done? Is there an actual lie detector place that does it for a price:thinking:
Run run run he wjll never change
Make a plan. Get a job. Look for agencies that can help. You leave when your ready.
Kick him in the curve man like that cant change… You can make a life for yourself than being second best for other women.
Trust me when I say this no man that truly loves his wife will belittle her like that… It’s in their blood…I’m sorry I can imagine how you’re feeling… Trust in God that He will make away for you and your kids… Plus he will have to support you financially
Leave. He doesn’t respect you x
Leave. He sounds awful. 
That may have been the longest run on sentence I’ve ever seen.
Do you do the grocery shopping? Ask for cash back, and hide it. Stack up some $, and make a plan to escape. It can take some time. Take time to get ur thoughts and head space right for the kids.That IS cheating. No person deserves to feel like that. It’s a horrible feeling. I hope u see a light at the end of the tunnel. Good luck girl! Stay strong.
Leave period. And ask the step child’s parent about the kids still being around each other. Hopefully she is easy to coparent with. Ask yourself this, is he someone that you would want your daughter dating or even marrying? Clearly you are not the one for him. Vice versa. Get your life in order and the one for you will come into your life.
Following kina going through the same thing but we are married an he only does it while he is at work caught him many of time an he just got a phone again not even a week ago so just a wait an see game he got a new number an there is already a snap chat on there under Blake an that’s not even his name 
It sounds like a sex addiction. I’m willing to bet he is having sex outside the relationship. If he is a sex addict, and you’re wanting to stay, look into Dr Doug Weiss. If not, girl get a job and leave and never look back!!! Being with a sex addict sucks and isn’t something I’d recommend. If I were you, I’d leave.
Girl leave because you don’t want to be in this situation when your son is 13 and step daughter is 14 because he won’t likely change and probably be worse
Leave cause it’s not going to change. Also don’t think for a minute it’s you cause it’s not this is all him. There’s nothing you could have done or said to change it. But before you drive yourself insane always wondering what he’s doing just leave. You deserve a whole lot better & so do your kids. Plus god forbid he gives you something.
He has proven his character twice. He lied to you in big ways. This is what you will be living with for the rest of your life if you stay. Are you okay with that? He doesn’t respect you. Get a job. Support yourself and kids. Leave him. Or settle for being cheated on.
Things are messy in life but everything can be untangled.
You know what you need to do. Your just providing excuses to stay cause it’s scary especially with little babies. If you have family run now…if not start planning and executing a plan to run. It’s never going to change.
Whether he has cheated physically or not what he is doing is disgusting and disrespectful AF.
You need to leave hun.
Leave you deserve so much more
Wanda Ivette Diaz
I literally dealt with this with the father of my kids and I just let it happen until finally one day I had my last straw I finally walked away… This is a kinda thing where people are gonna tell you “you should leave you should leave” but in your heart you know when enough is enough. Your gonna constantly forgive him until one day you look at yourself in the mirror and realize you deserve more then that even if you have to start from square zero. Shoot I had to move back in with my family because everything was in his name. But just the fact that I don’t have to worry or stress Everytime Im not around him or stress myself wondering if I was good enough because he chose to cheat speaking to females … no enough was enough. And babygirl you will definitely know when enough is enough. And when you do just know your are amazing your a good enough. You got this your strong mother. 
Do you think he’s a good role model for the kids? A man your son should try to be like? Or a type your daughter should look for in a future husband? I think that will give you your answer. Don’t let the fear of a year of adjustment sentence you to a life of unhappiness.
I’ve been put in your shoes without the kids . Same action, same response it will never change. Sorry but it’s gonna be hard but your trust is already broken.
It may seem scary now but girl pack your stuff and leave you’ve got this plenty of help out there don’t stay just becuase he’s in control of finances I’m sorry your going through this but your kids need a happy mum break free bow while kids are small they adjust super quick get out and good luck xx
Bbbyyyyeerrr bitch he would history
Leave…i just went thru this last year except he physically cheated while i was in the hospital with our youngest for two weeks bc my water broke at 31 weeks
Holy shit. It’s like we lived the same life. Except he hasn’t done it again. Just once. And I only stayed because of our child. If it ever happened again, I would leave. It broke me. It’s cheating. Especially if they’re sending pics back and forth, planning to meet up. You deserve better. You put up with it once, you don’t need to do it again. Contact family, and get out of there. Get your life together to where you can provide and leave him.
He’s pretty much done everything but put up a giant billboard telling you exactly what kind of man he is.
He needs therapy, he’s addicted to these sites. Unfortunately, he will not get help like so many others. I’d start making plans to exit this relationship. Start by saving $, looking for work, maybe stay with family until you can do on your own. Is there low income housing, apply. Talk to stepchild mom, maybe kids can still be together. Don’t waste your life waiting on him to charge, he won’t. Been there, paid the price!
So while his first was still a baby/newborn, you met him and started your family with him? I think you know what type of man you have, however like so many others, you think you are special. Just move on and please date men who didn’t leave their first child’s mother with an infant.
He’s not going to stop and you know it. You can love yourself enough to leave or you can accept his ways and stay.
Didn’t need to finish reading. Go. FASTER! Don’t walk, run. I get it, change is scary. Doing it on your own is scary, but losing all self respect is even more frightening! I know, I was there once. Give faith in the Lord, he will provide and guide you. Best if luck to you in whatever choice you make.
It doesn’t really matter what “we” think. What matters is: if you think you can TRUST him or not. Relationships are built on trust, so if your answer is “no,” then you should end the relationship.
I found out my ex husband was talking to other women when I was pregnant with our oldest son. I stayed, listened to all his excuses and tried to work on our family. Over the years I found pictures women had sent him and conversations and he always said it was never physical. It had been going on since a month into our relationship and after 5 years of marriage he slept with 2 different women in the same week while I was working my ass off. Just leave girl. It doesn’t get any better. If they can carry on talking to other women it would be long before they physically act on it.
He’s a sneaky snake🐍 can’t be trusted.
Girl. A lie detector? No…u have enough evidence. Leave his ass. Child support will help and get assistance till you get on your feet! He is gonna give u a disease!
Leave take your kids move on
I stopped reading after “telling women he wanted to meet” - which is right about when you should’ve given up too
You should be SMART and prepare to leave because now that you know your relationship will crumble whether you want it to or not. Obtain evidence and keep it in case you need it. THINK and PREPARE
Girl I just went through the same thing. He didn’t change. I left & took my son & not even 2 days later he was in a new relationship
Move on. Get a job save some money and make Life for yourself and your children that you don’t have to question
Do you know if he did stay off the sights after the baby? If so and than got back on he could be addicted. Talk to him and find out . If he wants to change for you and family suggestion counseling . The internet has caused all kinds of addictions.
If you can accept this behavior and his lust/his chase/giving his attention to other females—stay. And do you from now on.
If you want better, a chance to find real love and respect—leave.
All of your kiddos are watching — or will be. And that thought alone — being an independent woman with boundaries with the one person that was supposed to put me as a priority — was always enough for me, for my daughters. They deserved a happier mom. I, personally, wouldn’t give up on that. Learn to depend on YOU.
Ugh…the internet, man.
Honestly when we’re pregnant things are so different and we really remember how we were treated and this might not be something so easy to get over. It’s going to be very hard to walk away and get on your feet, but it isn’t impossible. I don’t think it’s healthy to stay with him bc your trust is broken so even IF he did stop (which I doubt he will) the damage is already done and you’ll always second guess with him. So maybe just take a break and see how it goes. Maybe he will realize he’s gonna lose his family and stop but be prepared for him to not. You don’t want your kids growing up watching a toxic , unhappy relationship.
Good luck 
I would take him for everything you can get
I don’t know why people think you can just go get a polygraph to find out if your boyfriend is cheating. 
Your intuition already knows all of the answers to the questions you’re asking so dig deep; you’ve got what it takes to get this done for a better life for yourself which equals a better idea for he kiddos. You got this!
He’s cheated rather it was physically or not he still cheated. Time to do better for yourself and kids. Once trust is gone things are never the same. Best of luck mama
If you are thinking of staying with him, remember he only is saying he wants to change when he got caught. He didn’t want to stop whenever you didn’t know.
Since you have little ones I would not do it suddenly. Slowly start looking for ways to start making your own money from home, or if you can’t find a work from home job find a job close to family and friends. Once you find a job and have a start date, look for a place to live around that same area (if you can’t find a work from home job), you don’t want to live far away from where you work. Also, don’t be afraid to ask for help. While you’re still living together, start sleeping seperately and if you do house work or cook don’t do that either. If he’s going to disrespect you like that, he doesn’t deserve you. Only do what you need to do for your children and yourself, don’t go out of your way for him
He has a sex addiction. It probablly started with porn. It has nothing to do with you. Hes very insecure.
Throw the whole man away!! You got this!!
Lie detectors aren’t free. You gonna ask him to pay for his own lie detector? 
I don’t see that going well. 2 options. Accept it & do your own thing like him or 2. Move on and be an adult.
Leave!!! Don’t look back. He will not change, and you will never fully trust him again. Don’t put your feelings on the back burner just because you have kids involved.
I would say stay and save. Then leave when you feel prepared to
I went thru the same thing … Leave now … Don’t give him anymore of your energy
Think about your daughter, if a guy was doing this to her you would not be okay with it. Get a job and move out. The trust is broken and he obviously doesn’t love his family as much as he says if he continued to do this knowing it would tear the family apart. Try and reach out to family members to help you during this time. It will take awhile for you to show proof of income. But you need out. Start the court process of child support and custody because it could get nasty if he thinks he supports you by paying most the bills. You and the kids deserve better. Cheating isn’t just physical. Words are cheating and the things he said to these females under accounts with different names and a texting app is cheating. Don’t think less. Show you’re kids that treating someone that way is not okay.
Leave. No reason needed. Take care you your kids and yourself.
Leave. I just went through the same thing. DM me and I can give you details.
Eleven years I tried and the past two years were horrible and 2021 going through the divorce was even worse.
I’m so sorry. You deserve better.
If your not happy kids won’t be happy. Leave. It’s whats better for you all
Why do you sweet loving girls give your all to a man that doesn’t care enough to commit to marriage before you ever have his children? They are just using you with no respect at all. 🥲