Your fine you said and Did the right thing it makes absolutely no sense to change their last names just because all of a sudden he feels the need to change his!
Or why doesn’t he keep his name the same and match his kids. This changing names after your grown up and not adopted, married, or divorced is just another money pit and silly.
Change it to yours and be done with it
He wants them for his taxes…leave them just the way they are!!!
Nope you’re not being harsh
That would be a nope from me. His name choice does not flow to the kids at this point.
I don’t feel what he is asking you to do is right.Not harsh at all.
You are absolutely right. Don’t do it.
I wouldn’t change anything.
If you weren’t married and he signed an Affidavidt of Paternity, be can’t change it either. It’ll be cute if he tries though.
Just think of all the paperwork required by government agencies as they get older. Having to connect this dot to that dot etc etc is expensive and depending on the situation probably unnecessary girl leave them as they are or put them under you.
He is a deadbeat dad but feels entitled to have your sons have is step dads name whom the children don’t even know he sounds like a real character. If you are going to change there last name change it to yours while they are still young.
I’d change it to your last name all of the kids
I changed my last name to my step dads as a young adult and now my preteen son wants to change his last name to that last name. I’m fine with it even tho my dad passed years ago and my son didn’t know him well. My dad was a amazing man and amazing dad and papa. He just wants the last name of someone that loved him more than his own father.
You did the right thing. Don’t change the boys name for a non-participating father.
Nope, I’d change it to mine.
None of your kids names should be changed… if so they all meed to have your last name… some men are as sharp as marbles
If he wants his kids to have his last name and it’s THAT important to him, he should keep his own last name! He knows where you stand.
Absolutely not!!! If you’re going to change it change it to yours. Don’t waste your breath on him.
HELL 2 THE FRICKEN NO!
I would tell him go to last place he seen his marbles cause he has lot them! One question .How long was this man in Labor with them.
They already have his birth certificate last name, the original so what’s the point? No you were not harsh enough and besides why should it even matter being as he’s not a part of their lives anyway? He doesn’t deserve to even be acknowledged to begin with! Leave their names as is unless you remarry a man who really does earn to be called Daddy otherwise let him kiss you right where the don’t shine you move on being a good Mom!
No, don’t change their name. If anything you should change it to your last name since the dad will now not have the same last name as the kids.
This is so bazaar to me everyone always changing surnames … I understand everyone wants the kids to have there last name but it would be hell if there was a medical reason you needed to know the fathers/ mothers real last name
Tell him he can pay for it
Wonderful choice for him. Tell him that. But why change the kids unless it’s to yours or unless you remarry and the kids want the SO name
Leave as they are "
He ain’t a father if he ain’t putting in the effort
Um, no. If he wants a name change the kids could just carry your last name. Not a person they don’t even know.
The audacity:joy: block
No your not too harsh. But I think I’m confused as to step dad and dad. This is not clear as who is your childrens bio dad. You said step. So
Pretty demanding for a guy who is not even in their lives …
No, you were quite right not to confuse the children!
Nope ! He should care more about his boys and sharing the name he gave them he’s an adult choosing otherwise !
I wouldn’t change the last names. The kids can choose to change last names when they are older and they may just change it back or change it to yours so just leave it as is.
First sentence was a no. “My son’s dad” just because the child’s father is making a choice don’t mean u have to follow suit. If he wants the same last name as his kids he should just keep his name.
Let the children decide later on too confusing
just tell him if they want to change it as adults like he did it will be their choice when the time comes
not too harsh at all
You are not too harsh at all.
He has a lot of testicular fortitude asking you to change their names when he rarely sees them. SMH
Just leave it as is . Don’t even think about it .
Nuh I wouldn’t agree to change the name either. If he wants to change his name that’s fine but don’t force the kids to change just because he is.
Goodness no, you aren’t too harsh. Don’t change their names unless it’s to your last name.
No u shouldn’t change their names especially if his a absent father
No you weren’t and just leave as is
Nope! But I kinda think you should change their names to yours if he does change his otherwise they won’t have either parents last name and it sounds like you should of used yours in the first place.
I would keep it how is, or consider changing it to yours
Did the father change his last name?
Men get weird about last names. I don’t know why. I find it possessive. If he has no relationship with the kids other than DNA, there’s no reason to change their names.
Don’t second guess your self mom, go with your first gut instinct!!!
Block block block.
It makes no sense and he’s trying to get a ride out of u.
Don’t react and stick to ur guns!
No you definitely weren’t too harsh
No you weren’t harsh at all, I wouldn’t be changing their names unless it was to my own, both my boys have my second name just because I wanted it that way when they where born as I knew with both boys I’d end up raising the both of them on my own anyway! It really doesn’t make sense, why to f*** would he want to change his kids name to someone else’s that they don’t even see🤔 especially when he’s a drop in just whenever he feels like it! I’m sorry I’d get the kids names changed to yours.
I would have said the same. Leave it as is or change it to your last name. Dad CHOSE to change his name KNOWING his kids have his current last name. Not yours nor the kids’ problem.
I don’t think he wants to support them,if they don’t have his last name he could say they aren’t his.
I am a firm believer that little boys should always carry the surname of their bio dad. This is their genetic history. They grow up to carry on the bloodline. As an adult, if bio dad wants to change his name, then ok. But the little boys should be able to carry on their bio bloodline until they are an adult and can change it if they decide to.
I use to believe that kiddos last name should be that of their father. Now I wish I would have given my kids my last name. But I won’t change it. In adulthood they can change it if they want. My kids are 20 and 16. Both just now talking to their dad. They always knew him. He just makes appearances every year or so.
Change it to ur last name then nobody is confused after that
Food thing ge can’t legally change them without your consent
You did the right thing
Keep the last name they have now.
No no no keep it as the kids now there last name
My sons raised other guys kids know what you mean
No don’t change their names. When you can change their names to your maiden name and then you go back to that. That would give them a sense of family.
My oldest son has my last name even though in the first few months his real dad was their. I’d loose all contact since he’s not a dad.
I would change your kids name to yours before anything else!! You are right.
I have a Granddaughter that has two kids by different Dads the kids names are her name NOT the sperm donors !
Regardless, I think you should change their names to yours since dad isn’t even involved.