Consequences do you give your children when they lie? In the age range of 8-10yrs old… one of my examples is that my daughter lied about someone hitting her at school when no one actually touched her.
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Taking something away that she loves to do or a favorite toy, and explain to her lying is not good.
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I would make her apologize to the class for making up a story that could have gotten someone in trouble. Then have her explain why she did it and what she thought would happen… honedt embarrassment works!
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My step daughter lies to me ALL THE TIME! After getting frustrated (and not being able to spank her if needed for anything) I had to creative with ALL punishments. 1.) have her do an awful chore or 2.) have her look up a word in the dictionary, write out its meaning and then use it in a sentence correctly 5 times… that way she finds it excruciating yet it’s educational 
Find out the true story!
Talk to her about trust and that you will always be I. Her corner for her whole life , but the deal is she has to be totally honest so you can. Promise yourself not to freak out when she does confide in you. Celebrate that . Practise a bit of silent screaming while looking calm. If you guys get it working well with truth and trust , you’ll need the skill. 
Best of luck X
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Talk to them about lying and how it effects others and they won’t believe anything you say and how would you feel? Especially if it’s real. and possibly read the book the boy who cried wolf.
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My son did this once. Honestly, I spank my child. But not on this one. I sat him down and explained to him why it was never ok to lie. Even a small lie could accidentally end up in a big one and then it could get someone in trouble. We talked about lies and consequences for your actions and choices you make. Even at 7 he understood, I haven’t had an issue since.
I would take something she holds dear away for a week. My 3 1/2 year old is lying, hit a girl in the back, and bit her today. I took away the toy dog she carries literally everywhere, made her sit in time out as soon as we got home, she got no treats/snacks only dinner, and went to bed early. She will also be apologizing to that girl tomorrow. For an older child ask her why she got her stuff taken and make her acknowledge what she did. Then ask her if it was a fair punishment or what she should think punishment should be so you can correct her if need be. Then make her apologize directly to the person she lied about. Not the entire class. There’s no reason for that and would only do damage. Teach her the effects of lying.
Read them the story about the boy who cried wolf every night for a week. After the story ask them what they have learned from that story
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Communicate
Ask her why she told the lie.
Is there something going on?
Speak to her about being able to trust her words and how very important it is to be able to trust one another.
I’d follow that conversation with one about consequences and tell her if she continues to tell untruths she will need to pick a hard consequence and if she lies again she will need to follow through with her choice of punishment.
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Write 20 times the Definition of the word lie
Everyone lies. Seek to connect with the child for the sake of understanding.
And:
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It depends on if it’s a repeating issue. Compulsive lying needs to be handled differently than a one off. Definitely make her apologize to the person she lied about and anyone else if they were involved such as teachers. Also writing definition of lying out a few times. I also had my daughter when she was about that age wrote a short essay on why it’s important to be honest.
I made and still make my kids “research” the legal consequences that are connected to their action. For instance in your daughter’s case, penalties for lying under oath. I made them define it and describe the legal penalties. Then they have to compare it to what they did and “suggest” comparable punishments. I always give them 24 hours to complete it, it must be hand written. Then we discuss together what they found and together we come up with the consequences if they do it again.
So far I have had one child caught stealing money ($70 from the man who has stepped up for him) made him write his paper and had our discussion, this occurred 8 mos ago. And to this day he can still tell you the possible legal action had he been an adult caught by the cops. We have had no more instances of stealing (not even the last pop out of the fridge… lol)
Another child got caught smoking at the wonderful age of 15, he had to not only research the legal but also the medical consequences. He is now 20 and will not touch a cigarette or vape. When I have talked to him, now as an adult, about the punishment he said that it wasn’t so much having to write the paper that impacted him, but it was grown up consequences and the conversation that helped him the most.
Not saying it will work, but it’s worth a try.
Its a hierarchy. Sentences about being truthful. Dictionary words on truth, lies, trust. Then if it continues up the ante. Taking privileges, taking things away. Or what other ideas you come up w. I would suggest a counselor islf it continues, eso if its blatant lies to get others in trouble.Theres a difference in the types of lies also. Lying to possibly not get in trouble is normal. Lying about things that never happen to get attn or get back at someone is a whole other story.
She’s still pretty young. Kids say things like that probably to get attention of some sort even for no reason. Id make her apologize if the other kid knows what she said he/or she said. Then restriction and defiantly a nice long heartfelt talk is good❤
Sounds to like your daughter is craving for attention sit her down tell her that lying about something like that will not get her attention it will get her into trouble for lying and the other child that supposedly hit her gets it and it’s no fair she would owe the child she accused and apology teach your daughter that people that.lie eventually loses in the end good luck
With my son I read to him the story " the boy who cried wolf" and explained to him that one should never lie because there will come a time when he is telling the truth and noone will believe him…and I tell him I love him too much to allow him to behave that way. I think giving him an example of why we should not lie…such as the story…helped him better understand his actions and why lying is wrong. Each kid is different though…what worked for me may not work for others and vice versa.
I would explain the damage a lie does to the trust in all relationships. I also relate a time when I lied to make them feel less alone. I share my pain and frustration when I chose wrong…however, my oldest(10yr) still chooses these things and has gotten to the point where he is now writing the whole book of Proverbs for his sneaking, lying and stealing candy from my bedroom over and over.
She should get the punishment of a hitter
She should apologize to the person she accused. Should also see why she accused that particular person, don’t accept “I don’t know” for an answer. Talk about why she shouldn’t do that, trust, all the things that go with it.
Go to her school to fake confront the hitter but wearing a tutu and fairy wings…and carry a sign saying (childs name)'s mummy
What I find disturbing after reading all the comments is not one person has asked how do you know that the child originally lied? Your all very quick to give consequences and embarrass the child for lieing before finding the facts out yourself. Parents need to model the correct behaviour, so the child can learn, appreciate and respect. No wonder we’re turning into an abusive and selfish society. Sad 
My dad told me the story of ‘the boy who cried wolf’ & I can honestly say I never lied again! & I’ll be doing the same with my little one.
I would also tell her to apologise to the person she lied about & make her understand she could have got said person into serious trouble for her lie.
For one have her apologize to the child she lied to or about. Having to say your sorry .Makes you really stop and think about what you lied about.
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Almost every kid goes through a lying phase. They lie for different reasons, see what they can get away with, protect themselves from shame or getting in trouble, avoid embarrassment. So get to the bottom of why you child lied. There should be an age appropriate consequence, lose tv/internet/phone privileges for a time. But also you want to highlight that telling the truth always has better outcomes. Set her up to do something good, volunteer, help with dinners, etc. Something that she can accomplish and you can be proud of. Praise and reward her for what she did well and establish that truth is the best option.
apologize to the child for lying and then take something she likes to do (at home or after school) away. A child lying is learning it from somewhere…find the source, even if it’s you. Kids do what they see, not what they are told.
Explain how accusing people falsely can make them feel and how serious it can be. How people dont like or put up with liars. How she can Express she needs attention without gaining it negatively. I never learned a damn thing from things being taken from me. All it taught me was resentment and how to be defiant. I was spanked and had “consequences for my actions” it’s all a bunch of bullshit. Treat your kids how you wanna be treated. Treat them like the fucking humans they are. They might give a shit if they’re taught empathy and guilt.
Not really as punishment, but maybe some therapy to get to the root of the lie and to be sure it doesn’t continue? Punishing a child over this kind of lie might shut the child down, that’s why I suggest the therapy.
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Take away privileges but you should also try to figure out why she lied about something like that.
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Maybe punish her how you would if she had hit someone. Then tell her that whomever she’s lieing about would be punished for something they didn’t do and she would see first hand how unfair that would be. And to lie about that seems like maybe she’s looking for attention? I’d really have a conversation about why.
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How do you know she lied?
I would get to the bottom of the lie befor punishment than once you know why she did it than l would make her sit and write an apology letter explaining why she should not lie about things like that again
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maybe just try to explain that lying is not good that she could get somebody in big trouble potentially. I wouldn’t punish her to much like somebody stated above then she will be afraid to talk to anybody and shut down completely.
That’s a big thing to lie about. She should get something taken away, something that is her favorite.
My son gets his iPad put on top the refrigerator for 1-2 weeks depending on what he did wrong.
I explain why the punishment is happening until he clearly understands it and doesn’t just think I’m being mean.
In addition, I suggest getting a little deeper into this one. If your child acts out, look for WHY.
This particular lie seems like a cry out for attention. Perhaps find out if that’s what she’s needing… maybe some one-on-one time.
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I threatened my daughter when she lied about something silly.
Told her that she will lose my trust, may not seem like much, but when the time comes to go hang out with her friends, drive, do all the things, she wont be able to, because lying breaks that. She’s 7 and is brutally honest with me, and even tattles on herself. It’s building that with them from a young age.
Good luck.
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To answer your question… I would try to understand why she felt the need to lie about something that never happened, hear what she has to say. Guide her depending on her answer, then no dessert or screen time for a week. Seems steep to some, mild to others… In the end we only have so many years to guide them the right way before they legally are on their own. Lying can easily become a dangerous habit that will ultimately cause unhappiness at some point in life, as trust in her will be difficult to find from the ppl she surrounds herself with, be it friends, family loved ones, etc. You got this momma! <3
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Take care of it now mama you don’t want her falsely accusing somebody later in life
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No toys, tv, or electronics. Have extra educational worksheets to do and reading.
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I make my son write standards and we take away privileges.
My son lied about something to some friends in school and it upset them pretty bad. When I found out about it I went to the guidence counsler and we had him and the students come in so he could apologize and ell them he lied. It seemed to help the problem. Maybe have her apologize to the person she claimed to have hit her for lying about them.
Take a small privilage away short term (like not going to the park this weekend or whatever) but then most important, figure out WHY shes spinning tall tales. Punishments alone will not work if the cause its addressed.
I used to get soap in my mouth for lying. I had done the same to my 13 year old in the distant past, but I’ve also grown in my parenting and have different knowledge now.
Sit down, talk to her and find out why she lied about it, discuss consequences with her, if this is a first offence, leave it at the discussion. If she lies often, figure out why and then take appropriate action.
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I would want to get to the root of it…instead of punishing her.
Talk to the teacher and give her lunch detention for a week. Mine is 9 years old, teacher makes her call me when she misbehaving and then hands teacher the phone. Instant tears.
Yes, you should try to figure out why she lied. But if you feel so inclined you can give her a dose of her own medicine. Maybe tell her something she really wants is going to happen. When it doesn’t you can explain about how lieing hurts and burns trust. I did it with my kids. It worked.
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hmm depends maybe this girl is bullying her why would she make that up for doesn’t sound right
We do 1 week grounding for an action and two weeks grounding for a lie
I always tell my kids I hate liars. They don’t wanna think Mom hates them cuz they lie. But yet they still lie 
if I were to punish them for it every time, they’d be punished til death. Simple grounding from things never hurts
At that age I would first try to figure out why she lied about it and reason with her and try to get her to understand the consequences of a false accusation, if that makes sense and then work thru the issue and form a punishment from there.
By no means saying it is ok but kids are gonna tell lies at some point. Correct them. If it becomes a routine thing, dig deeper and see what the issue is.
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Take away all of the luxury things she has (game systems, music players, toys, etc)
Sometimes a dose of her own medicine will give her a view of the other side of a lie.
Like after a few weeks pick her up from school and say she is to stay home because someone said she did something to them , let her feel what it’s like to be on the other side .
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Apology letters to the student she lied about and the teacher she lied to as well as yourself, and electronics restrictions for a week.
Sounds like a plea for attention
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Definitely is trying to get more attention. You should talk to your daughter.
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Are you SURE she’s lying?
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Think it’s very important to explain types of lies. Would be really hypocritical of us as parents to say lying is bad when we all lie, at some point for whatever reason.
I’m very big on consequences, I tell mine every single thing we do there is a consequence. Sometimes that’s a bad consequence and sometimes it’s a good consequence. But most of the time we don’t even see these accuring.
I think anyone suggesting therapy for a child of that age for telling a lie like that is slightly excessive.
Having your child see the consequence of the lie he told and having him take responsibility is so much more important rather than trying to punish and take things away.
That’s just my opinion though, good luck.
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My daughter now 8 has lied since little. At age 4 she got CPS & cops at my door saying I “punched her in the face” When she actually had a problem going on & needed surgery for nose bleeds. That got cleared up but last year same situation, but this time said a boy touched her, not true either! Shes been in counseling since age 4, is extremely dramatic & emotional, has separation anxiety & has constantly said kids her, I go talk with parents & turns out its mine who started or mine is the mean one 
So much that I literally started ignoring her every time she came to tell.
Its stopped to about a little lie every other week…dr says she is seeking attention & this way is easier for her…she also NEEDS compliments or literally its tears & no one loves her!
Its frustrating, but I suggest you start with some type of counseling services see if there is a reason that the lies are being said, before it gets out of control like my daughter.
I’ll also add, dr thinks my daughter got it from my mom, my mom has narcissistic tendencies, compulsive liar & the thing where you fake sickness or make yourself sick…my daughter is sadly headed that way.
If it’s a little paper cut she will milk it like no other. Even make her self bleed more…make sure everyone notices shes hurt…
Hope this helps you some. Sorry I’m all over the place.
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My so did the same . Eventually he was seeking attention. Ask her what shes feeling a why. Validate I’m sure if we find petty she had her reasons an I always say to my kids an measure with my hands when. You get I trouble your trouble is this big an when lie trouble gets. Bigger s bigger
Instead of punishing, I’d start to get curious about what actually prompted the lying. Was there something she gained from it? If so, help show her how she can get her desires/needs met another (more healthy/honest) way. That’s the only way to actually solve the problem. Punishment will just make her fearful of more punishment (so she’ll probably just get better at deceiving to avoid more punishment).
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Soap in the mouth if lies are coming out then the soap goes in .
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How do you know no one touched her? Becareful. Others lie too. Kids can be easily intimidated into saying they lied. Lying is s very difficult thing to disipline. You have to believe 1 person over the other. If you believe the other & your child is telling the truth you have lost respect, trust from them & they’ll feel you’ll never believe them. They’ll lie more. But if you don’t disipline it the lies get more elaborate. I tell my children I trust you 100% but if I learn you’re lying I’ll loose that trust in you. You have to be totally honest with them too. If you lie you’re teaching them to lie.
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I mean I would personally talk to her. Sit down with her 1 on 1. Tell her how u feel about lying. Teach her that lying in the house is against the rules. Lay some rules out. Like just explain to her why it’s bad and that you both need to trust each other. Also ask her why she lied and just talk with her. Dont punish her because of a lie but rather speak to her and build a bond where u both can trust each other.
Take away things. Electronics, give chores, and if it continues a few taps to the behind just hard enough to catch their attention.
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I was a child that lied. I’m pretty sure about almost everything. I just felt like lying was more interesting. I don’t remember wanting more attention but it’s possible I did. It went on for years and my parents tried everything - spanking, time out, taking things away… nothing worked. I kept on lying. Eventually I stopped, but not really because of the consequences. I just grew up and out of it. My point of saying this is that if you try everything and it still doesn’t work, there’s still hope that she’ll grow out of it. But, still try everything you think is a good punishment for lying.
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She is seeking attention even if its negative. Sounds like she needs to talk.
I had a dear friend tell me one time that when her children lied she had the same consequence just as if they had used a bad word and that was soap in the mouth
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You allow them to suffer the natural consequences. It will be hard and you be supportive. Hold her hand while she admits she lied. And you hug her when she comes home sad because someone caught her lying. You let her see from you and others the disappointment of being lied to. Never shame her, just lovingly refuse to give her anything that requires trust UNTIL she starts telling the truth when she could lie. Its a no power struggle strategy. You’ll see.
Try not to be to hard on her, i will see why she told the lie, let her know its wrong, but kids arent perfect nor are parents, we all learn and live, i would talk to her and find out why she feels the need to make stuff up, maybe a counlor being to strick isnt the answer, nor is yelling, i would have atalk with her, sometimes thats all it takes.
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At that age kids lie for all kinds of reasons. Ground her ass. Make her clean. Shes old enough to learn to do dishes, sweep and wipe things down (No chemicals of course). But ground her for a few days if you go that route. Cant just be an hour or the lesson wont stick.
I sat my daughter down & explained what lying was, how bad it was & how hard it was to earn trust after a life is told (and almost always discovered,). I told her that when she told a lie to her father & or I, it was not only disrespectful, but it was like slapping us in the face. Also, she didn’t want to get a reputation for not being truthful. You may want to also find out why she lied. Good luck, I hope this passes.
Lying is very damning for the person being charged…If it were mine god help her.
Our 7yr old tried telling me dad said it was ok to have her tablet and told dad I said it was ok. Needless to say she got in trouble with both of us and now the tablet is gone for a month. This is the 3rd time she has lied about it. Dad works 6am-3:30pm and I work 5pm-10pm so she thought she could get away with it. Not only did dad get onto her and have a long talk but she had a long talk with me as well. She has also started trying to cause me and her dad to fight so we have started asking each other first if she says we said something.
When I caught my kids lying I would tell them how it hurt my feelings cause it was hard for me to trust them or believe them and asked them how they would feel if I lied to them about stuff.
Figure out WHY first.
If a child lies there is a reason…attention seeking…lack of confidence…lack of communication…lack of being heard.
Open communication and don’t get upset when they make mistakes.
I dont even know how id punish my child for lying about something like that. Do some of you not realize how that can screw someones life up? What if she claims a teacher touches her when it never happened?! There goes an innocent person who’s reputation, job, and life are now all ruined because your child lied about it… My nephew tried that one time with me. I put him in time out and he looked me straight in the face and said “I’m gonna tell mommy you hit me and hurt me”. I recorded him saying it and why he said it. That shit can ruin a lot and I wasn’t gonna sit back an let a manipulative lil kid lie about me like that all cause I wouldnt give him his own fruit roll up.
Talk to her. Find out why she chose that girl to accuse. Mentally and emotionally, children between the age of 7-11 are just begining to experience “past and future” . Up
until then they live in the moment.
Trying to assimilate to this new concept is difficult and many children are labelled liars,when the truth is they are just really learning how to discribe things and finding the correct words. Also very vivid daydreams.
It really depends on the situation and what they are lying about.
I think their may be more to it, why is she lying about someone hitting her? What was the conversation about for her to make up that lie?
Talk to her find out whats going on for her to feel uncomfortable with telling the truth explain to her that lying is bad. Dont hit or yell thats horrible and will cause her to be afraid and to lie more. Maybe take something away that she likes if none of her reasons for lying are appropriate.
Talk with her, not pointed. She how shes doing. Sit down and do something she enjoys, nobody else around. See what’s on her mind. The lying is a symptom of something bigger. Be kind and patient, supportive, don’t probe.