I have two girls one is 9 months and the other is 6. I am engaged and he has a 3 yr old girl and a 5 year old boy. I work three 12’s a week and he works for his family’s pest control company so 90% of the time he doesn’t get up and go to work and they never say anything. He will stay up all night and play Xbox and sleep all day especially on days I’m off so I can’t get anything done with him laying around. He has 700$ child support and that’s all he can really pay so I feel like I’m paying everything else. everyday I try to wake him up he cusses at me and tells me to get out. He owns both vehicles so whenever he gets mad he says don’t take my vehicles. I’m stuck on it i should leave or what should I do. we just had the baby and another thing that makes me mad is whenever we have all four kids he never gets up to help me i get up make breakfast for them I change his daughter i take them to do stuff while he sleeps I’m just tired of it. please help.
He’s taking an advantage of you, doesn’t appreciate or respect you. He’s just controlling and using you.
Tough situation however the relationship seemed over from the beginning. He sounds very immature and controlling. Time to leave.
Narcissistic!!! RUN !!!
#BOYBYE
Seems like an ass, your paying for everything, doing everything, going to work while he does NOTHING. leave, take your kids, pack your shit, and leave. Then take his ass to court for more child support.
You need to hit the door running and never look back. Easier said than done but worth it in the end.
of all leave sounds like hes causing more harm than good relationships should b 50/50
Talk to him…tell him if hes going to make you act like a single mum as hes always in bed and no help then you are quite able to be a single mum for real…let him know its not what you want but will do it and manage as you want a true partner…and to be equals…
No reason to stay is a good reason to go. You end up with What you put up with.
Leave! He clearly has no respect for you or his children. You don’t deserve that and neither do the children.
Leaving him while having a very young child seems tough, I agree with the others. You need to leave. It’s not going to get better. This is were a lot of women think they can change the man. If hes that old and has responsibilities in front of him and not taking care of them hes not just gonna wake up one day and change. If he dont see that he needs to step up and be a “husband” and “father” he dont need you doing it all for him. You cant change someone. They change because they love you and want to change to make life better for the family.
That’s narcissistic abuse amongst many other things. Hes a deadbeat and doesnt appreciate you. Leave now!
I wouldn’t be engaged anymore
Welcome to mother hood if u dont like it take the kids and go
If you’re tired of it and unhappy why do you need us to tell you what to do? You know what to do for your kids and yourself.
Girl open your eyes leave him already
I am in the same boat I work every day while my man stays home and my baby just turned a year old but I’ve dealt with it to long I am just now looking for my own place and hoping for the best
I wouldn’t be engaged anymore. If this is the way he is then this is the way he will always be.
Do you want to continue living that way?
Your the only one who’s going to change things
You’re engaged to this clown? Get out and live your life.
Have you told him that this upsets you? Try having a serious conversation with him and tell him if things don’t change you will leave. But first buy a car
How old are you? You are a mother of two babies, by now you should know what you want for you and your children. Certainly not to teach them the habits this child/man has. Run as fast as you can, also sign up for child support. You do not need this burden of a man on your property. Please women, stop living in fantasy land when you have other little human beings depending on you ! They deserve better. How on God’s green earth did you even agree to have a child with him knowing what a looser he is?? Run , asap don’t look back.
I’d be so gone. You deserve better than that.
You know your answer, leave that twat.
I would definitely leave him he is treating you disrespectfully that shows he doesn’t truly love you or respect the relationship you guys have. Leave now it would be harder to leave if you got married. That is not a healthy environment for your children and he should not be treating you like that at all especially sense you are the mother of his children.
I don’t think he just started acting this way so I’m not sure why you had a baby with this “man” to begin with but I would leave or at least avoid having any more kids with him. He sounds lazy and rude and he’s causing problems that you don’t have to deal with. I would definitely leave.
Leave. It’s hard for you because you are emotionally invested. You have to look at it with cold hard facts.
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he won’t change and this will become more and more and MORE of a bother to you as time goes on
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he treats you bad and speaks to you bad
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he’s lazy
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he’s not worthy of you.
If you stay, it will just become more and more unbearable. I think it’s time to go.
Girl bye. You have an adult man child. Leave
There is no reason for him to change u allow it. If u live in a city with bus taxi Uber what ever, move out. His parents don’t seem to care if he works or not so why should he. Plus he has u paying the bills , really ! !! Won’t change till he has too sorry
I’d leave. Thats not fair to you at all. Hes not good for you or those kids. He needs to grow up.
It will never change unless you change it. You can talk to him and try to work it out or you can do the hard thing and leave because if he won’t change now he won’t ever change.
Tax time is here, use your return to buy a car and get your own place
Im so sorry you’re going through this. It’s WRONG, HES TAKING TOTAL ADVANTAGE !!! It’s also emotionally and financially abusive to keep the cars from you and throw fits like a child when you try to wake him up for work. Please know that he’s not going to change, you are wasting years of your life sweetheart. The long you put up with it the more damage to you and all these poor sweet babies. It’s going to be very hard ,but I believe you should go . He will promise to change and freak out when he See’s your really moving on. DON’T FALL FOR IT!!! He can change while your not living with him if he truly wants to act like father and mature man. You need to leave and see what he does when your gone. Don’t let him treat you and all these innocent kids like he is. He needs to GROW UP!!!
dump the bastard and get out while you can
omg please leave. He’s a baby and you don’t need another child to take care of especially since that child is a “man”
Honestly, you can do better.
Damn girl your rasing 5 babies. Take your kids and go girl. He is no real man that’s a lazy little boy. You deserve so much better than to be treated that way
It won’t change. I know. It just gets worse. So decide do I want to work my ass off until I die or do I leave and only work half as hard and be happy
I couldn’t imagine my fiance cussing at me for Anything, especially waking him up? That’s so disrespectful. This man sounds like a childish prick and I wouldn’t continue to take care of His other children and pay his bills…
It won’t get any better get out!
All the advice is to leave him but maybe he is suffering from depression. We are only getting one side of the story.
He needs to man up! Sounds like a teenager! Think real hard before you marry that fool.
The sleeping all the time COULD be linked to a medical issue. The rest though; he’s just an ass. Give him an ultimatum of what you need/want from him and see if he changes. If not, you know what to do.
Sounds like a loser. Leave and live a good life.
I know exactly how you feel I had an ex boyfriend that I was living with his three beautiful girls I love them very very much he never paid for anything apartment wise electric gas phone bills he had his own truck I pretty much paid for that and pretty much paid for his child support I finally after 3 years I think I only stayed for the children because I love them, I call his ex-wife told her I kicked him out I said when he comes to get the girls he has no place to take them because I’ve kicked him out she said to me if I don’t bring him back I will still be able to see the girls because she knew that I love them that was my out I loved them and I think I was there for the kids and I still talk to two of them today and they’re older. The older one I think the father has brain washed her but he used to beat me and never did anything I work third shift and I had just had enough of it
You notice all these diff women saying the same thing? To leave him… we all have been thru this and having to deal with this kind of man child before… yes it’s really hard to even think of leaving let alone having to feel like ur breaking up ur family or whatnot… but just imagine how hard it’s going to be when ur 9 month old is much older… or if you end up pregnant again with ur second child with him and you feel endlessly trapped and deep into severe depression bcuz ur beyond sick of being controlled everyday and mentally and physically abused by him. This is ME… decide which is going to best for you and ur kids. And stick with ur decision. No matter what.
take your babies and get out when you can
leave because he has shown hat he is lazy and dont care about you so get out hes no good for you
Run, don,t walk,just leave. And go after him for child support. he can pay for the other children and your baby. Don,t feel sorry for him. H,s just a user!
Why are there? All he wants ia a babysitter for his kids, and someone to pay his bills.
Throw the whole man away
Run away. You and your kids will regret it if you don’t.
He sounds like he has a LOT of maturing that he needs to do. He’s not ready to get married, hun.
I agree that is not a healthy environment for you or your children.
It’s hard when u just had a newborn too 
and having to do everything is so stressful. If u don’t feel like being there anymore can u ask ur family if they can help u stay at their house? Let him take care of his kids- he is their father after all.
First of all that is not healthy in the slightest. I was in a relationship like that “that’s mine” none sense. You are his woman yes and accepting him is accepting his children, however, your job isn’t to take his responsibly. So what I would do is tell him to get up and take care of his children or tell their mother she may as well keep her, she’s not on visits to see you she’s there to see her father. Then I’d remind him, these cars are yours but this child will remain with me so u can give me the car or I’ll take your ass for child support and you will pay me enough for a car payment on my own since ur already not helping me with bills anyways. You don’t want to use this all the time as a scare tactic but don’t lay down an take it, throw your threat and let him know you have power as well and your not playing his bullshit. Best of luck. Sorry your going through this, personally I left my situation and I found a man who doesn’t throw things in my face like that and helps me with not only his daughter but my sons too.
First of all you are with a man who is still a boy in his brain leave him.
Hahhahaa…i wouldnt be engaged to someone like that. Wtf. Why would he cuss you out or not help around the hohse? He is a man child that needs to grow up and work more. I wpulsnt pay for all his crap. I wpuldnt allow my children to see that kind of behaviojr. It teaches the girls that its ok for a man to treat u like garbage and u will just smile and allow it to happen. Ew. Its not ur job to care for his other children either, thats a choice you make. I would leave that shit. Bye man child. Enjoy your two cars and all your expenses.
Kick him out! You pay the rent, tell him to get out. Call the cops if you have to.
Why are you even there still? ? You sound like the baby sitter nothing else.
your being taking advantage of ,i personally say councling so he can see what hes doing
Leave his lazy ass! You deserve much better!
Kick him to the curb, or you leave. A couple is suppose to do everything together, and if he’s not willing to work, get rid of him. Do not stay in a relationship, where he is an add. GET RID OF HIM
If there was love there it ain’t gonna last much longer, getup and take your babies and move on. He ain’t gonna change, wasting your time and money.
Stop doing everything for him. Just stop. Let him feel the consequences of his behavior. Don’t help him by paying his bills. Sit down for a heart to heart conversation. Be kind in your words. Express that you are a team and in this together. Decide who is responsible for what including chores and money. Have him pay the electric bill and if he doesn’t pay it let them turn the power off. Remind him of the love you once had. Express that you can’t do it all and it’s all not your responsibility. This is a partnership. You’re not his mom.
The way I see it is He’s USING YOU… You not his gf your his maid, caretaker,and. Babysitter. I’d be damn if I would stay with a co-depe dent yet along want to be married to him … sorry YOU would be CrAzY… Pray about this situation…
Could be he is depressed?
Do yourself a favor and leave
take a deep breath and read what you just wrote… and then take an ice bucket and though it on his ass and tell him to kick rocks… then take the xbox and put it in his vehicle and tell him welcome to his new home
Leave him now. Now…
What do you need him for? It’s not gonna change.
You should leave is behind! Useless.
Stop Whining& take YOUR Kids & leave
If I were you I would talk to him and let him know how you’re feeling. I would recommend seeing if someone can watch the kids, get yourself in a good head space and talk to him. He needs to know you’re serious and that you’re overwhelmed by the additional responsibilities that your relationship is unfairly putting on your shoulders. Let him know what you need and then give him time to change if he wants to stay with you. If not, have an out, make sure you have a place for you kids to stay and a way to get back and forth to work.
I certainly wouldn’t marry him! Food for thought… “if you always do what you’ve always done you’ll always get what you’ve always got”
It’s up to you to make changes.
Wow “don’t take my vehicles”?
Girl, he just doesn’t get the concept of family
Do yourself a favor and don’t marry the guy.
It’s not going to be easy, but get out of there as fast as you can.