Why is my child mean to me?

Hey y’all. So I’m a single FTM of a 14mo old. I work from home so I’m never away from her. To be blunt, my kid is mean af towards me lol. Like fr, I feel played as hell cus she already looks like her daddy’s twin and we haven’t been in each other’s presence since I was 2 months pregnant. Besides the point. I adore my child, love her so much, can’t get enough! I just want hugs and kisses, to play, learn and for her to call me mama or mommy hell idc. But she won’t! She calls everybody else by name on occasion but not me. She hits me, pushes away and runs from me ALL the time. Gives me attitude, spazzes out and chooses everyone else over me. Dude, does my kid not like me?! Seriously like if a stranger was watching us from afar, you would think I mistreat my kid in some way by how she doesn’t care for me in her presence and slides away from me like yea whatevs. How do I get her to like/love me? We’re supposed to be besties! At this rate she’ll be calling me by my first name :weary:


Chill you fine my sisters son cslls her by her first nsme its a thing now even the nursery think its ace but when he upset he does say mom and my nieces and nephews say my before anyones name and my own kids dont even give me a kiss at drop of they just gone :joy: its independence at its finest and girls have a hole load of attitude to go with it on top wait till she dont shut up and she rolling her eyes then you will be like yeap theres me :woman_shrugging::sweat_smile::joy:

Have you tried a mommy’s day out program in your area? Maybe give her some time to miss you?


It’s Normal! Study’s have found that children are actually a lot worse when around their mother!
Not sure if they know why, but it is a study worth googling. It may help put your mind at ease!


Her behavior is what you have allowed it to become. Discipline your child!


Saaaame! My girl will be 15 months on the 4th and she’s just vicious towards me. She loves her damned daddy, though. Never hits him or anything.

My Girl is just at her most comfy when I’m around. No worries, mom’s there.
When She’s not with me, she’s an angel ! But then there comes Mommy and the waterworks come landin’. She cries, throws tantrums… all because she had to save it up to when she is safe again. And that’s with me. And I find much comforting in this, she loves me so much that I’m the only person where she can let all her feelings go. I’m her trustworthy Mommy


Why did you literally post everything I went through :joy::woman_shrugging:t3: I cracked tf up , this is the best post by far! Kids can be assholes. I’ve simply labeled them as sour patch kids- first their sour , then their sweet :smiling_face_with_three_hearts::heart_eyes: it’ll be okay hang in there momma

Try to give her time to miss you

If you’re always with her maybe y’all need a break from each other so she has a chance to miss you


It will get better ! Mine was similar to that when she was that age but it got so much better later on and she’s glued to me. I think it’s just part of toddlers they’re learning so much at once , it’s normal :relieved:

I would say maybe getting her into a daycare a few days a week and let her miss you sounds like she’s just trying to rule the house and you’re in her way lol


Are you sweet and loving to her? Your attitude is going to create her attitude. Hug her, kiss her, tell her she’s special and do it all with a big smile. She’s still a baby and has plenty of time to express herself to you.


My now 7yo called me “Beth” from about 8 months until she was almost 18 months old.

When she hits- swat her hand and say no in a firm voice. When she cries don’t show any attention. You gotta let her know who’s boss now or it will only get worse as she gets older.


I’m daughter did the same thing.She wld call me my name but if its only u and her what do u expect no 1 else calls u mom.But she seeing how far she can push u before u get mad.I mean my kid was a hellion to me but so good to everyone else.I tried to potty train her forever.Left her over night at a friends car to pick her up and she was potty trained.Never wet the bed again.Sometimes u just gotta step back

You are letting her run all over you. She knows it bothers you therefore she wont. I do not care how old she is she should not be allowed to hit, yell etc. Say you. Timeout and loss of toys, favorite activities etc. She won’t eat get her down and make her wait til next meal etc. She will not starve to death. You are not her best friend but her mother. She needs limits to feel secure. If she does not call you mommie you do not have to answer. Remember the show The Nannie. Not the comedy the other one. Get some copies at the library or online. She helped a lot of families get things on track. It is not easy being a single mother you can do it. Make sure you do not feel. unloved because she resembles her dad. Sometimes it is hard to keep those feelings separated when there is a close resemblance. Hang in there!

1 Like

be her parent not her friend. if she’s out of line, punishment, discipline. dont let her get away with being nasty straight up or it will continue and get worse when shes 3-5 yrs old…

1 Like

The point of the matter is your not your child’s bestie your her parent you need to start disciplining her or she’s going to keep running over you


When she hits u or before she does grab her hand nd put it down by her side nd tell her ur not gonna hit me or anybody else no more its unacceptable or ur gonna start suffering the consequences nd toys will b taken nd u will sit in time out. Dont say it soft or playful u say it in a firm strong voice to show her ur not playing around no more. I started when they were one. I have a 8, 4, 3, 1 nd a 3 month old. I’m getting tougher more now on my one year old they all love to push buttons but u got to stick to ur ground nd show them nd tell them what will b acceptable nd not acceptable. Just a thought this has been working for me maybe itll work maybe it wont. I hope things work out for you

1 Like

Also talk to her I know she cant really talk talk but ask her would u like it if u or anyone hit her nd if she says no or yes(you’ll explain hitting isnt ok nd can hurt ppl) nd tell her u need to treat ppl the way u want to b treated. I do this with my kids too

Was I the only one confused at first? 14mo? Lol. Smack her ass take her stuff away

Do you give her attention when she won’t call you mama? Or when she’s mean? A lot of times we don’t realize we’re giving kids attention when they are doing these things, even if it’s negative attention. Kids don’t necessarily differentiate between negative and positive attention. They just know they have yours and honestly it’s a bit of a power trip for them. :woman_shrugging:t2:

It’s because your always with her. You all need a break, at least a few hours.

1 Like

So be a parent and discipline your kid :person_tipping_hand:

1 Like

Probably in her “terrible two” stage

Make sure she is getting enough exercise to get her angry feelings out too, because she probably is on her best behavior elsewhere but let’s her emotions out with you when she feels safe. Research what pediatric psychiatrists have to say on the subject of angry, disrespectful kids. They DO test your limits & your patience (no matter the age, but especially 2-3).

1 Like

Let her know you are the boss and not her.

1 Like

If you focus less on being her bestie and begging her for attention, and just parent her, you’ll find she respects you more and you earn the special place of ‘mom’ that she can come to when she needs Mommy / a Parent instead of yet another adult that she can run all over… kids need boundaries and parents. The relationship will develop over time, but only if you set the parental role now so she knows she’s cared for and someone is in control.

You’re her mother, not her friend. Discipline her. I would bite my kids back if they bit me or each other. If she hits you, put her in her room for 3 min, or spank her but once or twice (not hard enough to leave a mark, just to get her attention). She will learn. You gotta be firm and consistent. Show her that you will not tolerate behavior like that.

1 Like

Do you give her consistent boundaries? It’s all about trying to find a balance.

Bust her ass when she hits you plus your gonna have to be mom not best friend

You’re not supposed to be besties. You’re her mother and she is your child. Focus more on parenting her and worry less about her liking you. Chances are she sees it gets a reaction from you and she’s feeding off it.

Your not her best friend, your her mother.

Girl, just know you aren’t the only one. My oldest is 12. Soon to be 13. I went from momma, to mommy, to mom, to bruh, to some ticking noise. I say no to this child and he will act like I did him so dirty. And then I sit down here alone feeling like an asshole, and I didn’t even do anything wrong! Lol hang in there mama, it’ll all be A OK! :ok_hand:t3::ok_hand:t3: