Would a judge grant visitation to an absent father?

Depends on the judge…

Yes the judge will simply because he is still legally her father. Ask him to sign over his parental rights and then you can stop child support.

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What’s more important? The money or your child free from someone who cares more about money than them? If your life and her life is better without him and you survived financially, let it go. Continue being happy without that drama.

Typical selfish mother​:angry::angry::angry: Who are you to decide your child cannot see their natural parent…let her make up her own mind about him!! Happy enough to take his money tho eh grrrrr

Don’t he will just try to break the happiness in your life hear me sister stay away from him,men have this tendency of coming back after the kids are all grown up but are nowhere to be found when needed most

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Think what’s best for your child. One day she’s going to find out that your husband isn’t her real dad and she’s going to want to know who her real dad is and go look for him. Trust me. I know this. My dad kept my mom away until I was 18 and I wish he didn’t so I could of made the decision on who I want in my life after I turned 18. Now at 24 I’m still learning who my mom is.

Sound like he is manipulating you to drop the child support.
There is no straight answer about judge and visitation. Luck of the draw

I dont know what state you are in the laws very state by state. I’m in TN and I can tell you that a judge will let you know real fast child support court and visitation court are two different court dates. Get an attorney and go after his right on grounds of abandonment. You will be required to have someone willing to adopt your daughter and take the place of “dad” but it sounds like you have that already in your husband. Good luck hope everything works out

I say drop the child support and deny him visits. He is the one that left and hasn’t been there for 7 years. Don’t put your child through that. The man knows nothing about the child. I would have your husband adopt your child. I am in the same boat my childs father walked out at 3 months and asked for visits when he was 3yrs. I asked the judge for there to be no contact and no visits and it was fully granted. So in my opinion i say do what you feel is right and best for your child.

You need to tell your daughter the truth. She knows what she has with her step father. Be secure with that. If you don’t do it now, it will definitely come back to bite you! These secrets are not yours alone. Just give the facts and let her ask questions. Your relationship will be better with the truth.

Paying child support means nothing he can see her and courts will allow him … courts will tell you child support has nothing to do with seeing and having the child …

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Why do you want his money?? If your husband provides for you, why do you take money from someone you don’t want in your life. I don’t think your logic is right.

Greatty bitch, should have dropped the child support,

Being in the same position , I think I made the wrong decision years ago . Drop the child support and have him sign his rights away . My son is 32 and still abandonment issues , it’s hard on the children when they decide to pop in play the hero and then disappear again until they choose to visit again .

Actually, yes he has every right to see his daughter. Even not paying and dime in support ,.it is not pay to play.And your not allowing will bite you in the ass in court. So I dont know why women think they have right to collect money and a father has no right to see their kid. Your daughter is not 13 months any more. And the problems seems to be you not the men. Why are you giving children names to.men you arent married to?

:frowning: you wont allow? It’s not up to you , it’s your kid if he is bad news she will figure it out for herself. Let her have a relationship . Coparent… like an adult… put your feelings aside for your kid.

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Sounds like you just want his money. I doubt he’s never tried to see her. I think youre full of shit and just keeping a child from her father while taking his money. This is about her knowing her actual father. Why are you even taking his money when her stepdad is able to support her? Has he tried to make contact before and you purposely prevented it? Is he abusive? If he’s not abusive and has tried to make contact I hope they force you to let him see her.

I hate to be a dick
If it is simple abandonment without felony abuse, drugs or criminal activity it is IN HER BEST INTERESTS to allow communication/supervised visits.
Start slow and rememberyou can only guide her in her interactions with him and help her interpret. She needs her Dad, even if only to put a face to the name.
Judge will probably not grant visitation after 7 years unless he can show evidence of why he has changed his mind.
It really is up to you.

You can’t collect child support and refuse him to see his kid. It doesn’t work like that. The judge will grant visitation regardless of him being absent or not

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More than likely yes bcuz he is on child support. If ur husband is her dad and supports her and u dont want the real dad interfering why keep him on child support? And tell your daughter the truth always.

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It does matter if he hasn’t seen her. As long as you don’t have full custody and he is the biological father he has as much as rights as you do…Question is? Is his name on her birth certificate? Cause if it is? That’s all he even needs to even take her from you for being the biological father. Will the judge grant him visitation? His her biologial father that pays child support? And that’s what the judge is going to look at to being with…So yes he will have the rights for visitations…My best to you and your daughter

If she has your husband as a father and who is raising her with you, why even get child support? Bc he has been paying support, he has every right to get visitation with his daughter.

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Has anyone thought about the fact that these kinds of Men could harm the child just so they don’t have to pay child support? If he cared, he wouldn’t have asked to drop child support in the first place. He isn’t going to force visitation because he doesn’t want any real responsibility and he certainly isn’t going to pay a lawyer to fight for visitation. My advice is to wait until your daughter is 18 and let her decide if she wants to legally change her name, she may want to take the Father’s name that helped raise her. Screw the deadbeat!

In Missouri they absolutely will allow him visitation, regardless of support or not as the courts are all about reunification. Since he don’t want to pay child support, allow him to sign off his rights & be done. Otherwise it’s going to be a shit show with court, you will spend a lot of $ and he will have more rights than he will ever provide with responsibilities. Oh, and when he doesn’t adhere to the parenting plan, there’s no reinforcement, you have to pay more $ and go back to court. Wishing you the best of luck to you!

No , even if he pays child support he has no rights since he chose to be absent , depending on what state you’re in it can be considered as child abandonment or neglect , he basically gave up his own the rights the minute he chose to be gone regardless of child support. There are alot of father’s who give up their rights but still have to pay child support , one has nothing to do with the other. I say hurry up and get your husband to adopt her , he has every right and has earned it too .

You can’t have it both ways…change her name and husband is her dad and have biological dad paying child support

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Yes the courts would allow him visitation no matter what unless he was deemed a danger to the child.

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Yes they would I believe

No way will he give visitation rights. If anything he will lose his custody rights nd still have to pay child support. I know this for a fact. Screw him after 7 yrs now he wants to be present FOH biological doesn’t give the right when your absent. Keep fighting for the name change girl. This infuriates me ! Kudos to the real father for stepping up when the POS didn’t…

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Why are you asking the internet for advice on legal matters??? There are free resources for this and you can look it up yourself. This site is so full of drama and bs now with all these questions that no one has any business answering.

Probably but supervised access to start with until he proves himself tell him if he doesn’t want to pay child support let your husband adopt then he be right out of the picture

They will grant him visitation no matter what… you can ask for supervised visitation for the first few times …unless you drop the childsupport then he is going to have rights to his child

He can take advantage of his visitation or not , with or without paying child support . He would have to be found a danger to the child to even get supervised visitation . He would have to give up his parental rights for you to be able to remove him from child’s life . Tell your kid the truth . It’s never a good idea to deceive your child about who they really are .

I dnt get this hole story coz hes been absent physical bt hes been present financially. Seeing that she only knws her stepdad as her dad then let go of the childsupport. U cnt have it both ways.

Her biological father has every right to see her and she has every right to get to know him.

I dropped my child support because of this. If you don’t want the father in You’re child’s life, you have to remove him totally.

Simp it’s not his blood, get a life mangina

Yes he will be given visitation. He is the father.

I think you should have told your daughter from the beginning that her “dad” isn’t her biological father. If you didn’t want him in her life you shouldn’t have kept his money.

Probably not. Has he been paying child support this whole time? If not, that would be considered abandonment.

The judge could very well grant it if he pushes for it.

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Oh my… I would hope a judge wouldn’t allow this considering he is a stranger to the child and hasn’t been around. But unfortunately I do think it will go in his favor.

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Sure will if he’s paying child support. Good luck! I hope it ends the way you want :slightly_smiling_face:

They would probably start with supervised visits so they can gain a relationship and then go from there. But I don’t think a judge will deny a father his right to get to know the child unless he is a risk to her.

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Depends on state and would probably start with supervised visitation.

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They will probably start it over with supervised visits but yes most likely they will.

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Yes, he pays support. It sounds like he wants his rights signed over if you want to change her name. If your husband wants her raised by him, then I think his request is valid. You want him to not see her and for her to have someone else’s Last name, but want him to still be a “dad” just when it’s for money. :face_with_monocle:

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Sadly probably ,especially if he’s paid child support

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If your husband treats her like his child, why not have him adopt her and completely rid yourself of her biological dad?

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Yes…but more importantly quit lying to ur daughter about who her biological father is to make yourself more comfortable.

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Yep they can and will

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Since he’s paying child support I’d say he will get some sort of visitation approved. If i were you I’d take his offer and drop the support and get the name change. He’s a stranger to her and no amount of money would come before the safety of my child!

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If he pushes for it and he says you just moved and he had no way of knowing where you went or where to look, he very well might get visitation. Reunification is big in the court system

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Lots of us make horrible decisions when it comes to parenting or non-parenting. I work in the legal field, I have for over 20 years and it’s never too late to be a parent. I’d seek legal advice and see what they say.

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Just drop support :woman_shrugging:t2:

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I think it depends on the state u live in. After a certain amount of time, its considered abandonment.

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Yes, since he the biological dad.

You made your choice that money was worth having him involved, unfortunately you’re now stuck with that.
They will absolutely grant visitation and despite the length of time, unless you can present a legitimate reason to fear her safety it will more than likely be unsupervised

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He might get visitation

You don’t want him to have contact with her but you still want his money and want her name changed plus you let her think that your now husband is her dad? You and the real dad are alot alike :woman_facepalming:t2:

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Yes. That’s her dad.
Hes paying support, he didnt abandon her by most state standards.
If you want it your way, drop the support and see of he will sign away his rights to have your husband adopt her. Only way you can change the name without his permission. You cant strip all his rights away, while hes still legally the childs father who’s been paying his support all this time.

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Drop the support and get those papers signed! It will save you much heartache in the future.

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1.You can’t change your daughter’s name without dad signing his rights over.
2. No rights; no child support.
3. YOU dont get to decide if your child’s father is in his child’s life. (How would you feel if reversed?)
4. YES a judge CAN and PROBABLY WILL grant visitation.

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That’s a toss up… it really depends on what is happening with him now. But, why would you want him paying for a child who he cant see?

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You want him to sign away all rights and continue to pay you child support?

Greedy. :woman_shrugging:t2:

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yes as they will try to go by parenting time guidelines. Visitation has nothing to do with support. Two totally different issues. Child support and visitation do not go hand in hand.

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Why would you make him pay support for a child you dont want him to see? You say she has another dad, that she thinks is her real dad, and he treats her as a daughter. You want her biological father to be a stranger but still want his money. That seems wrong.

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Lying to your child about who her father is will cause your child to have resentment towards you when she gets older. Since her father pays support you cannot just let your present husband adopt your child without the biological father agreement.

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Yes especially if he’s been paying child support. Even if he hasn’t, there’s still a parenting agreement. The thing is, he might see her for a while but he’ll probably resort to old patterns and ditch out again. Now you’ve confused your kid twofold. Just leave everything as is. It’s just a name.

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Yes. They will probably court order reunification family therapy.

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I would suggest supervised visits bc she doesn’t know him.
He’s paying you to support a child he doesn’t see… He’ll have to explain that.
Depending on the state, you can petition to have it changed based on abandonment. In my state, 6 mons with no contact is abandonment.
If the child support doesn’t matter, you can petition to terminate his rights.
Talk to a lawyer and then decide what you think is best for your family.

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Yes. He’ll get awarded visitation

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Yep he sure will get visitation. Considering he pays support like he’s supposed to. He’ll prob start out with supervised visitation. Then weekends.

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I have a friend who had a similar situation. Her son’s father stopped coming around at 6months, was rarely around after 3 months. She met her now husband when her son was 2 and he calls him dad. Her son’s father randomly decided when her son was 6 (never paid child support or supported his son from birth) that he wanted to see his son again. My friend was in the process of getting papers together so her husband could adopt her son. The judge granted first supervised visitation and now after 2 years he is on a normal visitation schedule like he didn’t miss the first 6 years of his son’s life. Beau still calls his step dad “dad” and his biological father by his first name. I hated it for my friend and her son…

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If he is has been absent all these years and another man has cared for her then why do you need child support from the biological father?

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Yup. A judge will order visitation. It may be supervised at first so that she can get to know him but they will definitely order it if he wants it and is willing to file for it.

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He could possibly get visitation gal around here mom and dad is just as important. I wish you the BEST of things for your little that’s what matters keep the best interest of you baby in mind! :heart:

Drop the child support. At this time he has all rights to visitations IF he is up to date on his payments.

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Every child deserves their father’s surname. You can’t deny your child that.

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If the child is adopted by your now husband than your now husband assumes all responsibility. That includes financial. It’s double dipping to take money for the child from both men

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Its def an a** move to have him sign his rights away and still expect child support.

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Why not ask him to sign over his rights, and have ur now husband to adopt the child and give her his last name? I would care less about the child support. Your child was raised thinking your now husband is her father, imagine the emotional damage she can POSSIBLY experience from learning that her real father never made an effort to see her and that ur husband isn’t her biological father.

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Yes a judge would grant visitation if he is her biological father and he requested it. Especially if he has been paying child support all this time. It’ll likely be supervised visits at first.

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I cut child support when my sons father said he wanted to sign his rights over because he didn’t want to pay. I need it but I cut it because he’s toxic and wouldn’t see his son regularly and because he wants to sign his rights over. Cut the support and cut him out of her life at least until she can decide for her own.m if she wants him in her life.

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If he doesn’t want to pay child support then he should just relinquish his rights and let your husband adopt her.with that being said you do need to include your daughter in any decision going for a forward so she does not resent you for decisions you make even if they are in her best interest.

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I don’t been to sound like a bitch but damn you sound like a bitch! You want the money and no visitation? Girl that is her father! Get off your high horse and let her be with her daddy wether money is involved or not! That is her dad!!!

If he’s gonna sign all his rights away you shouldn’t make him pay child support. Since your husband wants to be her dad, HE can handle her necessities… Your ex is agreeing to signing the papers if you drop child support. Drop the damn child support if you wanna change her lastname that badly.:roll_eyes:

Also by the sound of it sounds like you might be the one that tries to make things difficult. I won’t be surprised if he stopped seeing her because of hard you are to get along with.

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A judge will grant visitation…

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Maybe supervised visitation would be in order.

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Yes, a judge will give him visitation.

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No matter what you put on paper and no matter what you tell the child. Nothing stops her bloodline. She is her father’s daughter. You may say what makes you feel good about your decision but understand that she is the one affected. He has the same right to her as you do because like you he is her biological parent. If he doesn’t decide your involvement what makes you think you can decide his?? Most women claim doing things on your terms will save you pain and heartaches. No one seems to think of this child. Most women aren’t capa le of putting their child first not even in conversation. It’s always about his rights her rights. Never the child’s rights. As it turns out, these children have rights to their parents from birth.

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If your now husband adopts her then the child support stops. Your husband becomes the father and her birth dad will no longer have any responsibility to her financially or as a parent.

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He could get abandonment too though. It depends on your state’s laws.

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Being absent isn’t just cause to deny visitation.

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You can drop child support from such date that her name is changed.

Anything before that said date isn’t in your hands to drop.

But if he takes you to court then he will have to answer why he wasn’t around. It’s up to the judge to make that choice to grant him the right to see his child.

Go in and see if you can get him for abandonment. If he hasn’t kept up with the child support then thats on him and is proof he is unfit.

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Also, you have NO FN RIGHT TO DICTATE IF HE CAN OR CANT SEE HIS CHILD!!! This is about the child and not you! Let her have her daddy if he isn’t hurting her

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Why do women feel their more important to a child than the dad??

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You want him to drop his parental rights but still want his money…? Do you want him to be her dad or not?

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Child support and visitation are totally separate things! just because he pays child support doesn’t mean he’s guaranteed/entitled to visitation. Go in front of the judge first!

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