Would you be upset if your husband got you nothing for your first anniversary? He had plenty of time, but still didn’t. He did send a romantic text the morning of, but other than that, nothing. I’m not materialistic, but I mean a card or flowers would have been nice. Do I say something? Or let it go?
26 Likes
Did you get him something on this day or did made him dinner too say happy anniversary? - If you did that would of broke the ice.
5 Likes
It’s the first one so I’d forgive, but definitely speak up and set the tone for the next one!
1 Like
I’ve never gotten owt in 6 years I think its just most men don’t think like that🤷♀️ I just suggest a restart on ourcanniversary
Let it go… don’t sweat the small stuff…
Let it go. It’s okay. Smile and be happy with him.
State the facts, how it made you feel, and a solution. Say it all calmly. “You didn’t get me an anniversary gift and I feel disappointed. Can we have a special dinner to celebrate instead?”
This allows you to express your feelings without a screaming match. And you have a solution so there is a route to move past it.
I just read/took a class call Critical Conversations. It’s been amazing for my relationship.
1 Like
I get something for ours. Even though it’s a rough day. He always gets me something to cheer me up. My grandma passed away on our anniversary. Almost 5 years. I got a call as we were driving to go out to dinner. He even asked me if I still wanted to go eat. I said yes. I was crying at dinner, but I didn’t want to miss dinner.
1 Like
My husband remembers, I forget…
Married 31 years… we never buy each other gifts for our anniversary.
My hubby was not a shopper. My mom told me I could either shop for myself or be mad. That did the trick. We talked it over and he was happy as a lark. Some of the things I bought a diamond bracelet and a fur coat. He was glad I got something I loved and he was off the hook!
We’ve never once given anniversary gifts and we are about to celebrate our 14th. Instead we go on a trip together every year.
Make a plan for how you want to acknowledge it moving forward.
Yes that sets the bar for many years ahead if it’s your expectation you will have to address it
Will be this way the rest of your life if you don’t say something.
2 Likes
Did you get him something? If so, I’d be open with him about how you feel. The first anniversary is a special one and “not remembering” or “men doesn’t think of those things” just because he’s a man isn’t an excuse. If you didn’t get him anything either, then I wouldn’t say anything to him
5 Likes
Today is my 10 year. I don’t expect anything. That way I’m not let down. A simple Happy anniversary is gift enough. If they remember A+. However, if you had discussed previously and there was no follow through then you can be upset. Approach calmly and ask why there wasn’t a card, a meal made or special something.
Romantic text? 
how special. How about just talk to him and communicate? Idk why that is such a hard concept for people.
Right now communication is a must. This was your first year. Now both of you are going to start having different expectations or different ways. Talk through them now because if you don’t it creates a mess later
3 Likes
It depends on how you have dealt with special occasions previously, Does he always get you a birthday present, valentines, Christmas? My hubby and I don’t really get gifts for each other for occasions, we do buy gifts for the non occasions. If you aren’t gift givers then I would say he didn’t expect the anniversary to be any different. If you did want a gift then I would make sure you communicate that to him so he knows for the future,
1 Like
After a while sometimes they just don’t celebrate it as much. But if y’all are use to doing it every year I might be. But I wouldn’t get him anything eithety
I’d say something because you’re not happy with it. You should be able to express you’re needs and wants so that you’re happy.
9 Likes
Mine didn’t, but we have been married for 66 years, now, and still love each other.
Mine is terrible about gift giving, it isn’t his life language. We do things, we go places. I get I love you texts daily. And he’ll probably forg the date we got married by next year. If you have expectations, you need to talk about them.
2 Likes
I would be disappointed. Flowers, card and date night in a lovely restaurant . ( weekend)
Did you get him something? If so that should tell him all he needs to know
2 Likes
Maybe his love language is words of affirmation? If your love language is gifts, you may want to consider having a conversation with him. Communicating these needs with one another, especially in a new marriage, can help you understand the individual needs within the relationship.
Most marriages in their first couple of years will have road-bumps, hurt feelings, and new challenges. Don’t hold it too badly against one another.
1 Like
Nah it’s your first anniversary. This is a serious red flag. Especially when a major “joke” among men is accidentally forgetting anniversaries, birthdays etc. The fact he couldn’t even get you a single thing speaks volumes. Like I told my ex. It’s not about money. It’s about time and thought. You can literally paint a rock and if someone really loves you theyll treasure it…
3 Likes
Yea maybe let him know your expectations. He hasn’t done anything wrong, just probably didn’t think you were doing gifts etc, not everyone does that. If you didn’t tell him he’s not a mind reader. Communication is a HUGE part of making a marriage work, speak to your husband don’t hide behind posts on social media.
29 Likes
Did he give you gifts prior for birthdays, Christmas, dating anniversaries or just because??? If no, then I wouldn’t have expected a wedding anniversary gift. If yes, I would have thought your anniversary would have been no different.
2 Likes
No and yes. If circumstances didn’t allow it yes. Financial circumstances that is. But if it were due to plain unthoughtfulness it’s gonna be a BIG PROBLEM because now that says a lot!
No, a message or Letter from him expressing his love for me is what I cherish the most.
2 Likes
Nope! I would be upset if he did!! Material things don’t show love don’t fall for society set obligations and don’t put that on him you should just be shown love and feel that love every single day
2 Likes
the fact he sent a romantic text, is a lot better than nothing !!
I’ve been married for 5 years. My husband has never gotten me anything for our anniversary, my birthday, Mothers Day or Christmas.
I’ve also never gotten him anything for any of those occasions.
We always make sure the kids have something to give for special occasions, but that’s the extent of it.
We usually pick a nice restaurant for dinner on our anniversary and then we take a weekend trip, either the weekend before or after, to where we honeymooned, but we don’t stress “special occasions” because we both work full time and we tend to buy what we want or need whenever.
With that said though, every relationship is different. If you want a marriage where your anniversary or other holidays are celebrated with gifts, then you need to have a conversation with your husband and determine what dynamic you both want and what expectations you both have for your marriage!
2 Likes
I’d ask him where he was taking me for dinner
Let him know. Tell him how it hurt your feelings. Did u get him anything?
1 Like
If you are not materialistic then it shouldn’t matter and it doesn’t really spending time together should be enough
Speak up.
If you can’t communicate your feelings now at the 1 year mark, you’re doomed.
Sometimes we need to teach others how to treat us.
3 Likes
If its bothering you enough to turn to social media it should bother you enough to have a conversation with your partner
Ita your first anniversary he could of got you a card… so a little effort would have been nice I would say to him that your not being rude but you would have appreciated even just a card to show for the day wedding anniversary are different tp normal anniversary and especially a first one x
I can’t imagine myself needing a gift for validation , or telling someone “ hey I expected a gift from you “ 
1 Like
Are you going to let it go next year too? Say something girl or he won’t know what he did wrong
2 Likes
say something just tell him you were disappointed because you expected to exchange gifts. Did you get him a gift? That had to of been awkward if you had.
Say something. If that’s what makes you feel loved, it’s better to say something now, before this just becomes the standard. Plus, it’s always better to communicate your needs, than to expect somebody to know what you need and not get those needs met-and it prevents somebody from using the excuse that they “didn’t know”. There’s no plausible deniability if you vocalized your needs/love language. Just be sure that you communicate it in a tactful manner.
2 Likes
My husband isn’t a card person but l always buy cards. We used to go away for the weekend .
1 Like
Did you get him something? It depends if you guys are gifting people. I’m not really one myself. But if you didn’t get him a gift either, then let it go?
You’ll just have to tell him. Idk what it is about most men. My husband didn’t order me anything for my birthday but he took me to dinner and he wanted to get me a present at Walmart. He came back with a fishing pole 
it’s the thought that counts I guess
I’d say to be honest with him…it’s bothering you enough to make a post so it’s going to keep bothering you year after year. It’s better to let him know you would like something small at least 
2 Likes
Romantic text hits the spot for me. It was his own words and not bought. Hopefully you had a nice dinner date and all would be great in my world.
Been 32 years and still pick out my own
I’d have a chit fit! He wouldn’t do it again.
My husband knows that gifts are my love language so unless we specifically agreed ahead of time that we weren’t doing gifts, he would never.
Did you get him something?
There’s a lot that’s more important in life then material things, but if you truly aren’t happy you dhoukf mention it instead of dwelling.
I guess personally I’m ok with a simple romantic text at least he is thinking about you. My husband doesn’t get me anything (except for a romantic text or note stuck to the coffee maker)for my birthday, valentines or our anniversary. I’m ok with it.
No! He buys me whatever I want, whenever I ask. But, I don’t ask. I’m all about saving your money for a rainy day. I’d be more upset if I had all material things in my house and no money, for an emergency.
Let it go alot of men don’t remember the anniversary
2 Likes
Was he a gifter, romantic before? Did he acknowledge BD, Valentines, or any romantic holidays? No? Why you expect it now? Yes? it’s too early to be comfortable already! It bugged you enough to post here. You say something or this’ll be the first of many unhappy anniversaries.
I have been with my fiance for 8 going on 9 years. He has no idea when our anniversary is lol every year I mention it he says “holy shit it’s been that long”. Thats how all of our anniversaries go, and honestly it’s good enough for me
Nope…. Not sure why everyone thinks that material things are a must🤷🏻♀️
we nurture our love throughout the year, it isn’t reduced to just one day a year:woozy_face:
Girl i don’t even know our anniversary
I can’t believe how many women on here expect so little for themselves for a wedding anniversary. So sad.
Better day something now or it will always be the same.
Baby, You set the standard of how YOU expect to be treated. Which YEAR does a wedding anniversary become Important enough to be remembered with a card or flowers? Which Special date is Next, Your Birthday, Christmas?Alot of Men are BARE MINIMUM creatures, IN MY opinion a romantic text message is so LOW EFFORT I definitely wouldn’t be letting it go. Stopping to pick up a .99 card and a 4.99 bouquet of flowers IS an act of EFFORT.
He had a whole year to get you something.
Petty petty !!
Shame on you!!!
No because love is about time spent not money spent. Our first anniversary (dating) I was 9m pregnant and he was in MCT in California. Our 1st wedding anniversary I was 34weeks pregnant with twins and due to be induced 3 days later. His mom offers to watch the kids aeound our anniversary but money is tight at times (bills + 4 kids will do that) he just started buying me birthday gifts & ive told him not to because thats money we could spend on bills or the kids.
Time is better than money, materialistic things do not equal love
Men are simple let him know how you feel cuz he obviously doesn’t
Men are idiots 
some you literally have to tell them what you want or need. LOL 
Well I’ve been married for 20 yrs and have never hot anything. Of course it’s hurtful and would be nice to be acknowledged but it also wouldn’t feel good to get something only because I told him too.
Let go since he did text you and knowledge your anniversary
Let it go. You know he loves you and that’s what is important. Appreciate the blessing of another year together. I’d give anything to have my husband back
Did u get him something???
If that’s the type of stuff you’d like, you may have to just say so.
I mean I wouldn’t but that’s me. sweet words and some cuddles are enough in my view. You are materialistic if it’s bothering you. And that’s absolutely OK! it’s a preference and it’s most people’s preference. I would talk to him about it especially if it bothers you. Keep the like of communication open especially when it comes to your expectations. He probably didn’t know you were in agreement to exchange gifts. Did he say sorry when you gave him one if you did? You should feel comfortable enough to talk to your husband about anything especially wants just as much as needs.
Ugh I’m going crazy reading these comments saying you should let it go, take it easy on him, forgive him cuz he just forgot, that you should just not expect anything on anniversaries or holidays that way you won’t be dissapointed when he inevitably gets you nothing next time.
That’s all bullshit.
I told myself for 15 YEARS that I loved my man even though he “wasn’t creative, wasn’t romantic, gift giving wasnt his love language” BLAH BLAH BLAH.
That’s all BULLSHIT EXCUSES.
If you want to build a monster of bitter dissapointment and resentment inside of you that ends in 15yrs of your life wasted and divorce than yeah sure… let it go. He’s just a “poor dumb man baby” who “can’t do anything” let alone show you love through a gift on your anniversary. No. Its called weaponized incompetence and its a tool that benefits him. He’s not stupid. He’s not a baby.
IF HE WANTED TO HE WOULD.
He fucked up, he knows it. If he’s playing dumb “not realizing” he was supposed to do something for you on your anniversary, that’s a fucking lie.
Idk what to tell you, and I know I’m coming off as absolutely crazy, but I don’t care. And i don’t have high hopes for you, because that type of man, at this point in my life, wouldn’t even get me matching with them on bumble.
Hey he sent you a lovely message that’s awesome be thankful for that it’s the thought that counts. As you said you’re not materialistic so it shouldn’t really matter then 
I wouldnt give a rats ass
Was he like this while you were dating? Did he make romantic gestures for Valentine’s day, your birthday or anniversaries? If not it’s a little late to expect him to change. If he used to buy flowers or cards before, it’s fine to ask him why he stopped.