Should husbands go to bars/clubs without their wives? Arguing with my husband about this. He thinks he should be able to get (not even with his friends) on his own…I think its weird…
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I wouldn’t let mine do that. But you also do the same see what he thinks. For sure not the club 
. I’m glad not a club girl or drinks
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Well im not married but been with my partner 7 years… we live together we both do our own thing with each other and without as long as there’s trust, communication, respect I don’t see a problem.
Depends on other factors too…is he friends with the bartender? Big city or small town? How long? Day/night
There are a lot of variables
It takes communication from both sides and trust. If you have a gut feeling he shouldn’t he should respect that
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If we go out to a bar we go together but we don’t that’s what we are both ok with. Neither of us have a big group of friends that enjoy going to the bar so it’s never really been a thing for us. I don’t think I would be comfortable with it. The biggest thing is communication and if you feel like he is hiding something then that’s an even bigger problem and if aren’t comfortable and he still insists then that’s definitely a red flag for me. Why does he need to go alone. Why can’t you go to the bar together and he find another hobby.
My husband & I both have pretty clear boundaries about things. & thankfully this isn’t a battle I have to fight. Neither of us feel it’s appropriate to go out to a bar or club alone. I guess for some people this could be normal. If it’s not something he’s ever done before, why now? There’s something to that. If you’ve had these discussions before & he’s suddenly not on the same page, again, something to that. I guess I associate that kind of thing with something single people would do. Why does it have to be that kind of setting? He can’t just go have dinner and a drink by himself? Would he be ok if you did it?
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Ugh. 
I learned that we have to pick our battles on some things. It depends on what level you are in your marriage. We argued over the smallest and craziest things. So pick your battles. You and only you know your husband well enough. I know mine but I’m crazy so that’s a no to me lol
Tabatha Ventura this is control. She used the words would you let and I think it’s weird. She’s not trying to understand why.
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With friends is fine. I don’t think he would wanna go alone without friends that would be abit strange. But some people like their own company
Yes! It’s to socialize with others, if you’re worried then you don’t need to be married.
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I say it depends. If he’s been shady before or acting shady lately, no. If he’s good about being able to reassure you and is well trusted yes, but he’d also have to be able to accept if you do the same.
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If you trust him, yeah. If you don’t trust him, why are you with him?
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Yes mine goes and i go alone…complete trust
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We always went to restaurants and bars together. Different when golf etc during day . No problem
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This is an entirely SUBJECTIVE question. What works for one may not work for the other lol.
My husband goes with his army buddies and friends when they come into town. I stay home because I am not a drinker. Our trust is there so I don’t worry and he is respectful with not coming home too late and not working up the kid when he does. His friends are respectful as well. He lets me know when he gets there and when he is leaving and I always make sure there is a DD or get them an Uber.
Nowwwwww. Going alone - kind of gives me the ick. Cuz why sir? But again, that is just me lol. If he “just wants to drink,” do it at home. THIS IS NOT ME SAYING IT IS WRONG. My husband knows where my trauma comes from lol. Each man is diff tho. Everyone deserves alone time. His might be at the bar watching a game. TALK TO HIM.
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A bar? No not weird. A club though? I think that’s a bit odd to want to go alone.
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Absolutely… if you trust him and he has given you no reason not to, honestly you sound controlling. Would you go out to a bar with your friends?
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Mine has and always could
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“Let”?!
It’s a partner, not a child.
I don’t see the issue with him going out - unless he’s an alcoholic or has a gambling addiction.
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It is weird!! Be a firm “No” from me….one thing if he wanted to go to Gym or shopping on his own…but the Club…Nah G😂
But maybe I’m putting my own insecurities  here as I have never had a faithful man🥴 I guess if you both confident in your relationship and trust each other.
But yeah I wouldn’t like my man going out to a bar with just him…that’s if I had one:joy:

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Going with mates/work mates no issues going alone… Red flag…
I wouldn’t be ok with him hanging out at a bar. That’s the boundary for my relationship though you have to decide what you’re ok with
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Give him space… use your space.
On his own weird. With his mates fine
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I don’t think it’s weird to go alone? Why would you think so lol let the man have some chill time by himself.
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No I wouldn’t be comfortable.
I let mine go to a bar. I also go to bars alone. It’s called trust.
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Yes, I would. He’s not anymore likely to cheat there than on the low low at most places. Plus, those vibes are fun.
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Yes. It’s controlling not to allow your spouse time to themselves. If you trust them, it shouldn’t matter. If you don’t, then you have issues.
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Yeah I would let my spouse.
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Nothing wrong with it. You sound very to controlling. Let him have time out
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Let? I’m not his mom, I don’t let him do anything. He is grown.
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Of course.If you don’t or can’t trust him then you shouldn’t be with him or her and you both need space apart,jmo.
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The projection, insecurity, and control issues from women on this comment thread are wild! 
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Nope - 
nada - no way
My husband can do whatever he wants. Im not his mother. I dont LET him do anything. He is a grown man
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Maybe it’s me but the going out to clubs/bars alone after you get married is acting a little too “singleish” to me.
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I work in a bar so I don’t think this is weird at all. A lot of people come in alone have a few beers something to eat and leave. I also go out alone (meaning w out my husband) however my husband does not go out to bars w out me. Think it’s a personal preference.
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I don’t see a problem with it
Yeah, it’s weird. I wouldn’t go alone. He at least needs to take a dd… someone to make sure he gets home safe, vouches for what he did while drunk, and cuts him off if necessary.
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We don’t do bars and I wouldn’t be with someone who frequents bars or clubs.
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Don’t have trust don’t have no marriage period . I wish my hubby would go out !! Let him go but also set a time for you and your gfs go out even if it’s for dinner . I go once a month with my gfs to dinner and every month we go to a different place .
He can do whatever he wants its the choices that he makes is the issue… trust sounds like an issue in your case… mine heck no go ahead and go I’m chillen at home 
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Wait… alone as in with friends and without you? Or alone as in actually alone? I know someone that goes alone, they just enjoy doing karaoke and such and has friends that go on the regular so he goes to hang out
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All these people saying they wouldn’t “let” them. Wow
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Is he not an adult? U don’t own him…
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I would let my man go if he was into that sort of thing. It’s all about trust. Men need to blow off steam just as much as women do and not all men cheat. There are men who know how to say no
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I have been ok with my husband going to the strip club before, BUT this is because I actually trust my husband I married him for a reason! If you can’t trust your husband being alone somewhere why would you be with them in the first place. I actually am the one that encourage my husband to go out by himself at least one times per month. This man works all the time and then comes to our kids being loud and all over him, we all need a break.
Or will he be ok if you do the same on getting a day where you go get a massage spa day just by yourself idk if you guys have kids but if you do will he watch the kids while you enjoy some time alone.
Are you afraid of him cheating? Because he can do that any day and time even at work if he really wanted to. If he is a cheater you already in the wrong place if trust is not one of the things in your marriage will most likely fail.
I believe these are boundaries to speak about before marriage…also I dont believe in the allowing or not your partner to do something…we are all individuals and grown up…they are your partners not your property or child… if they want to do something they can…and after they do than the other partner can see if she or he is ok with having that take place for them in their life with someone.
Well, I’m not his mom so I don’t let him do anything. He isn’t my dad so he isn’t letting me do something. We’re adults. We both know bad choices have consequences.
I’ve gone out with my bestie several times. Have a couple drinks. Talk, maybe dance depending on where we are, go home. Nothing in that bar is worth my marriage so there’s also that. 
But my husband trusts me and I trust him. I’d send him on his way but clubs and bars aren’t his thing.
Is this a new thing? Out of blue? Is he needing a break? Stressed? If this is new, find out why now. It’s kinda random.
Everybody gets to be themselves. Even married. If going out alone is a boundary, it should be discussed before marriage.
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Let? He’s a grown a*( man.
No ,no, No 
People get married and they don’t want to take responsibility.
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why would he even think that’s ok… what’s the point of getting married if your gonna oogle over other girls and give them money?? hell noo
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I’m certainly happy for those of you out there who have never been cheated on, or at least haven’t figured out that you are being cheated on currently, but that is not the reality for 90% of us out here in the world. Men are dogs. They do what they want when they want where they want with who they want. And then they try to blame you for the distrust issues. Because you know exactly what they are capable of while they play games with your head and then you’ve got Women over here, who have never been abused in such a way, putting other women down for their discomforts and their issues that only other men bring to the plate. Women don’t just walk out and decide they’re uncomfortable because they can’t be obviously. They thought they were something worth having. Or they would not have been with the man. And then the man does something stupid like going to the bar and bringing home some dumb bitch and bringing home diseases
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My husband would never even consider going without me…
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I don’t care, mine doesn’t want to do this ever but it is weird he wants to go “alone”.
If my husband went to a club/bar at all his clothes would be in the front yard when he came home
My husband won’t put himself in a position he shouldn’t be in & I trust him. So more power to him!
So many people saying they don’t “let” their SO go out… I want to know why? Why is it weird?
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There’s no reason for him to be going to a club alone. You can tell him how you feel about it. But ultimately it’s his decision. If he decides to go knowing how it makes you feel then he just doesn’t respect you. Let him do what he wants and then you decide if this is the kind of partner you want for life.
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This is a personal decision. Some couples may be okay with it while others may not. You should def talk to your spouse and tell him how you FEEL. Use phrases like “the way I see things” or “I feel” or “the story I’m telling myself”. When you tell someone what they want to do is weird they are going to get defensive. So try talking about how you feel and go from there 
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Personally, I think it’s a fine. I trust my partner and he trusts me
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I don’t “let” my husband do anything cause he’s grown lol
With friends seems normal but alone would raise red flags. At the same time we have conversations about what we are comfortable with but we don’t tell each other what to do
My partner gives me the same respect he’d expect, and vice versa. But we also have very different rules from a lot of other couples, and we only know that because we do have those conversations and discussions. Openly and honestly, and both are heard and listened to to be understood.
Regardless of what the situation, your attitude towards it is the problem here🤷♀️ It’s not your place to control him, just to communicate your boundaries. And boundaries aren’t meant to control or give ultimatums either… They’re purely your lines you won’t tolerate crossing.
So for example “you can’t go out without me” isn’t a boundary, it’s just being controlling. “Going out and cheating, staying out all night, not communicating while you’re out, are all things I won’t tolerate in a relationship” are examples of boundaries. If he does something that breaks your trust, then it’s your job to enforce a boundary. But they aren’t meant to control anyone or what they do, how they do it.
If you don’t trust your partner going out without you, then why would you be building a life with that partner🤷♀️
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My husband is my child na… what kind of question is dat. Spouses are nt our kids and shouldn’t be treated like that… my husband can go where he want… I Trust him enough to know boundaries and limits.
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Hubby is a grown adult and can go out, I’m not his mother to “let” him do things. No. It’s up to him to make good choices and he knows he is not free from consequences. We communicated and still communicate clearly our feelings and agreed that a strip club, etc is not conducive to our relationship and both choose not to involve ourselves in that activity and would rather enjoy time together. We aren’t prudes by any means as we both love to have a fun time. Been together 20 years, married 19.
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My boyfriend goes to a bar near his parents house alone, but it’s a small town, and he goes cause he loves their food, plus everyone knows him there because of his parents.
If it weren’t for all those factors and he was trying to go to a bar with lots of singles his age, I’d definitely have a problem with it.
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We go without each other quite often. Basically we take turns going out without our friends.
I’m his wife not his Mother. I don’t like bars or drunk people so I avoid places like that. I don’t allow alcohol in my home or around my kids…his only option is to go to a bar. Which he doesn’t do…
Everyone needs clear boundaries. Let people do what they want to do, that will tell you everything you need to know.
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If it’s like after work stop and grab a drink and food at a bar then no problem… But getting dressed up to go to a bar or club is kinda sus. What is his reasoning?
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A cheater will cheat no matter where they are. Whether it be at a bar, work, or grocery shopping. Venue is irrelevant, character is everything.
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Well I think it’s about trust. He should be able to go out without you, it’s healthy.
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If you have to try and control you spouse’s body autonomy to force them to respect you then neither one of you are mature enough for marriage. This isnt the way it is supposed to be…
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How old is he to still want to go to bars and clubs? Weird. 20s sure. But 40s+ with kids and responsibilities. Grow up. That’ll be a no from me.
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I would. I 
trust my husband…however he wouldn’t want to go without me. I’m so lucky he’s my best friend 
If you’re afraid he’ll whore around you should know that you can’t keep him faithful by keeping him contained. If it’s a matter of him going out and you sitting home, that’s your choice.
Sounds a bit obsessive possessive and paranoid
My husband is the epitome of an extrovert, but he’d never go to a bar alone.
My husband can go wherever he wants to. He’s not a child and I’m not his mom.
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Yeah why not? He’s grown… if you’re afraid of him doing something he shouldn’t then why are you together?
I think it weird to try and control a grown man. He’s an adult. That and I trust my husband and he trusts me.
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I don’t “let” my spouse do anything…he’s a grown man and capable of making his own choices. He’s gone to bars/clubs without me, I’ve gone without him & we go together. We both trust each other & know our relationship boundaries. In 23 years neither of us has ever done anything to give the other cause for concern.
Well he’s a grown man but with that being said mine would never go without me or even want to. He doesn’t even like going to the home Depot without me haha. It is weird that he wants to go ALONE it’s not weird that he wants to go period.
“Let”?
You don’t own him like he doesn’t own you he can do as he pleases just as you can. If it’s a trust thing then why you there?
I’ve done it. Not because of any reason other than I needed to learn to be ok in my own company and I was tired of missing out on life when I didn’t have my partner around to go with me. I think you both really need to look into this but I think you need to come from a place of understanding rather than judgement and also you need to take the “let” out of that sentence. He is an adult you don’t let each other do anything you do it and suffer the consequences of that good or bad. If this is hard line for you you are allowed to communicate that and his actions from there are his choice however you don’t get to hold it over him if you say you’re not ok with it and will leave and he chooses to do it you leave don’t use it as a way to try and control him by calling his bluff. Not saying that is the situation however that is the way most people work so I’m sure it’s not off the table.
We are members of the VFW and sometimes he goes without me. Now if he was going to any bar on Ladies night, you better believe I am going with him.
Grow up!!! You don’t own him; he’s not your child. If you don’t trust him then maybe it’s time to leave. If the shoe was on the other foot people would be that’s a and that it’s controlling and leaning towards abuse. Why is it any different for the woman to be controlling? Just be glad that he yold you about it and didn’t go behind your back.
No strangling allowed,
Trust goes a long way.
Is he alright with you going by yourself?
My rule with my spouse is if he can do it then so can I.
Honestly this is controlling behavior. Yall prob need space from each other too…
You clearly can’t trust your man if this is an issue…or perhaps it’s you can’t trust yourself if you were to go out like that.
What you should do is ask when and where so you and your girls can get together that night.
Y’all could both have a good time with out each other you know ?
If the issue is you don’t trust him to be at a bar by himself, then I would be questioning the strength of your marriage.
IMHO.
It’s very healthy for spouses to get out with their friends and not always with their spouse, I could see if it was a strip club why you wouldn’t want that, but let the man get out with his buds to go to a bar, their should be enough trust for that. My man is able to go out without me with his buddies and or family members to do things, you have to have trust.
I think he would.want u too go with him
Yeah he can, just as much as you can lol you are not hos mum!! You dont LET your partner do something lol and ive been to pubs alone x if there is trust what is the problem xxx
He can do whatever he wants. He’s an adult
In other words you don’t trust your partner, has really nothing to do with the club or bar he wants to go to lol
“Let”, that’s just weird in itself.
Occasionally my husband stops on the way home for a drink or 2, like not even once a month. As long as he lets me know so I don’t think he’s dead in a ditch 
, whatever. Go have fun. 
I don’t think he should want to go without his wife. Jmo
After 27 yrs of being together if he want to go. He goes. If I want to go. I go. We had lives before this. And sometimes just getting out and away from everyone including friends, just needs to be done.
If you have trust. Why worry. Sometimes in life all people piss you off. And going out alone doesn’t mean, hey I want to fuck around, it means hey I dont want to be by anybody cause ya all drive me nuts!!.
Just our opinions
I don’t think the question is the problem here. The problem is you using the word “let”. Sounds like you either have a control issue or trust issues with your Husband.