A person at my childs school cursed at them: Advice?

I picked my 4th grader up from after school program today and the first thing she said was “one of the leaders cussed at our group today.” I asked what happened and she said a couple kids were goofing off and she yelled “what the hell!” So one kid said that’s a bad word and she replied with “well your all pissing me off”. It’s probably not a big deal but my daughter was so schooled to hear a school leader say this to kids. I asked her if she’s usually like that and she said yes but all the other leaders are nice and use nice words. Should I say something to the leader or to someone in charge? Or just let it be? I’m a little upset but it could just be my hormones :sweat_smile: just looking for other school mommas opinions.

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Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. A person at my childs school cursed at them: Advice?

I would say something she has no business talking to kids like that

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I don’t think hell is a curse word… But it shouldn’t be said to students… I say what the hell at least 30 times a day

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I could see if she said what the hell and it slipped out but to turn around and tell kids that they’re pissing her off is ridiculous.

Kids shouldn’t be spoken to that way in a School program just think if she would get really mad one day what she would say or do yes definitely report it go above them and not the leader.

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Im guessing the teacher is really young ?

I’d definitely let it go, but keep the communication open with your child about this person. I can understand getting upset with kids and letting my anger get the best of me. If this is an isolated incident I’d say just let your child know that she shouldn’t be talked to like that and sometimes people make mistakes. But if it continues then follow up.

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I think the curse words are the least of the concerns here. Her lack of patience and respect for her position is more concerning. I would definitely report it.

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Hell is a curse word now lol

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Hell is not a bad word…

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I would write her a letter and if doesn’t change after that then you report it

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hell is not a curse word… a 4th grader is 8-10 yrs old on average. They have most likely heard the word hell before. Many after care employees are teens…

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A school leader should never use that type of language!! Say something! Make sure something gets done about it!!

If the students spoke to her that way it would definitely be considered defiant behavior! I would report it right away. This person does not need to be working with children!

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Lmao… what the hell??? That’s not cussing. You’re being dramatic

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Is everybody just overlooking that this lady told a bunch of 4th graders that they were p*ssing her off?? Who tf does that?!

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I’d immediately say something that’s not ok at all and I’d report them that’s ridiculous don’t take the job if you can’t handle the kids

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I would for sure let that go

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and before anyone goes there- even churches use the word hell pretty frequently…

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Well being teacher is a hard job especially when kids are not listening. Maybe she reached her breaking point. I bet most kids have heard those words by parents and relatives and the TV they watch. That is a small mistake that can be forgiven. If it continues then I would say something.

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Report it. Kids not used to that type of demeanor can get scarred from just one bad apple

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I would definitely be saying something

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Someone in charge that way your child won’t be targeted.

I say report her. That kind of language is unacceptable.

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I get it , they’re kids… and maybe that person shouldn’t be working with kids if they are Always like this… but it’s just a damn word… can we seriously just stop getting so easily offended by words… maybe teach your kids that yes some people use bad words …but you do not want them to…

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No. It’s very stressful taking care of children, especially when they don’t listen. It’s not like she was throwing the “F” bomb around. I’m not saying it was right, but I also don’t think it’s that big of a deal.

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She didn’t swear at them… :woman_shrugging:t3:
Is this really something you want to report? I wouldn’t talk to other peoples kids that way but it’s not like she dropped the F bomb on them.

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I’d say something. Most these moms might be okay with a teacher cussing around their kids or at them and let it go but i definitely wouldn’t.

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Report it and what’s going to happen? NOTHING. Has anyone heard of a teacher shortage? Teachers get paid shit to deal with rude kids most of the time . Everyone has a breaking point and maybe she has personal issues going on as well. Who knows? Do you say those words around your own kids? It’s not like she told them to f*** off. She literally said they’re pissing her off and they probably were lol it’s not the end of the world

I get being pissed off at some kids, working with groups can be challenging, but telling the kids that directly like that is not okay. Sounds like the leader needs more help with whatever they are doing, as to not be so overwhelmed.

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Where was the cussing?

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All the Karen’s in here telling her to report it :roll_eyes::joy:

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Oh please. You guys act like your a bunch of saints. Maybe she was having a bad day or maybe the children were acting like fools. A don’t say not my child. Yes your child.

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Those aren’t even swear words. Not a big deal

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Have you worked with children in the daily?
I can see the slip of the tongue happening more and more with the disrespect all teachers endure daily.
I’m sure there’s more to the story I’d talk to her first before reporting cuz I’m sure it was a slip and the kids weren’t listening put yourself in the whole situation right now its just the revebration version of a child’s observation. I’d like to know her side too ans the side of the kids she was referring to

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If ask her when she wants to go get a drink. She’s clearly over stimulated herself. Saying wth versus dating with are you doing or something along those lines are two different things imo.

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I’d say something. It’s professional or acceptable. “Kids are stressful” :roll_eyes: yeah that doesn’t make it okay to use bad language. Definitely speak to her or the principal

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Yes, you speak up! You ask for the after school lead and also ask her for her supervisor contact information and tell them the situation. No one working with kids should use this language!

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I would absolutely being saying something. She sounds like she needs a new profession.

I’d be conflicted. While I use verbiage exactly like that I would expect that in a school environment they wouldn’t speak to children like that. I’d probably say something. While being a teacher has to be incredibly overwhelming, they knew what they signed up for & shouldn’t be speaking to kids like that.

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I’d speak out about it for sure. I’ve never heard of any teacher doing that.

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Cussing is verbal abuse if used in the wrong context and it sounds like it was.

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I understand the teachers frustration but she needs to watch her dang mouth. I’d address it with the lady and tell her if my child let’s me know of this again I’ll go above your head.

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I’d be saying something

If I worked in a school in these times , I would probably say worse :rofl:. You can’t imagine what they deal with daily from kids that have no respect. Let it go!

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You would probably get her fired for something so small!

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Hell and piss are very much tame words. She’s going to hear a whole lot more in her life, especially in the next few years at school. I’d let it go.

This has happened to our fourth grader’s teacher… I honestly feel bad for the teacher, they’re burnt out, lil pay, and entitled lil bratty kids don’t know how to behave or respect teachers.

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My kids are grown now. But I dropped much worse language in front of them when they were younger. She didn’t actually curse at them but the choice of words was questionable. I’d let it go and chalk it up to the kids were probably being terrrors. If it becomes a consistent issue then I’d probably say something

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That teacher has 20 of your spawns for 6-8 hours a day. The worst you got from her is hell and p*ssed off? She’s a Saint and should be left alone.

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My son hears worse from me lol so i would not really care.

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If you say anything at all, maybe go directly to that teacher. If that doesn’t fix the issue, then go to the principal. But I agree a teacher should not be speaking to students that way. not to horrible but still shouldn’t be done.

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Okay for all the people saying hell isn’t a bad word. Y’all are ignoring the bad part. If my kids teacher that they respect and look up to tells my kids “your pissing me off” guess what, your getting reported. I don’t need people making my child not want to come to school or being afraid to speak out of fear of “pissing off” the teacher

I’m just here to read the comments from all the Karen’s about how children should NEVER hear that kind of language from anyone.

My advice? Use curse words in the house more so your child doesn’t freak out when hearing very minor curse words outside the home :joy::woman_shrugging:

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I had an English teacher that on fridays he would give us assignments. Like…
“Go to the zoo, sneak into the tiger cage and pull on the bengal tigers tail. He’ll like it. I promise”.

Every week, we were given assignments to unalive ourselves lol

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That’s unprofessional

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I would say something

Not swear words , but not appropriate for an educator to speak to a child that way.

Going to someone in charge may seem a bit much but if you’re concerned for your child to be ‘targeted’.
I would talk to her , ask her how she’s doing. Maybe she has no support, I work in Out of School Care and Preschool during the day, and it’s nice to have some of my parents ask how IM doing. Cause sometimes it’s just not a great day at all.

You do what you feel is comfortable for you and your daughter.

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She’s not allowed to do that. Definitely needs to be addressed.

I guarantee every parent has said something similar to their kids lol. It’s not appropriate in school but I feel for the teachers and caregivers, kids are ruthless and some just don’t listen worth a shiii

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Okay when it said cursed, I thought they were actually cursing. :joy::joy::joy:

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Thats why i could never be a teacher :rofl::rofl:

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Say something although those words aren’t too bad your man priority is her and her comfort

Well…I don’t say those things around my child. So…I don’t think it’s very professional talk around children in general and especially my own.

If I didn’t say something, which i don’t think i would if this really was the first problem. I would immediately tell my children that it’s not professional to speak that way and even if we are having a bad day it’s not okay to treat people like that. She really needed to step away from the situation and take a moment. We all have bad days and Sometimes that’s hard to do. So it sucks it happened. I’m sorry you had to deal with that today and let me know if it happens again.” And then we would probably say a quick prayer for her and move on.

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omg… pick your battles…

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Nahhh def bring it to someone’s attention

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I say much worse so I wouldn’t be too concerned with those words.

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Buy that bubble wrap now :joy:. NOONE wants to work with children anymore and it is because they’re disrespectful as heck and anytime a child gets upset their parents go crying to the school with that “my poor baby” nonsense. Yet what did your poor baby do to get the adult upset ?

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Well if that’s all she said piss my 3 year old grandson off and he’ll f bomb ya to death try and deal with that autism not good

Probably unprofessional but I donno swear words are just words .

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If you’re the type that don’t like cussing at all and don’t want your child picking up on them then it’d be best to speak with the leader but if you don’t care if she hears them then I wouldn’t be too worried as long as they’re minor words!!

That’s not okay and that person shouldn’t be working there.

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I mean, were they pissing her off? Probably :rofl::rofl::joy::rofl:

I remember the first time I ever heard my teacher swear at the class. I was in 7th grade. I heard much worse from my mother growing up and my kids certainly hear worse from me but it was shocking to hear a teacher cuss for some reason lol I would leave it alone, if I were you. I mean, sure, it’s probably unprofessional but I don’t think it’s a super big deal.

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If she’s not belittling or making the kids feel bad I would be more interested in talking to her to see if she wants to hang out. She sounds like my kind of person.

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It is a big deal, she has anger issues. Report her before she hits somebody

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Girl if it makes you uncomfortable as a parent bring it up. Don’t let anyone sit here and make you seem ridiculous for how a teacher is talking around your children. They know what language is allowed and they know what isn’t.

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First time I encountered this I was floored and very mad then I quickly learned that school is changing with the times. I live in a smaller area and I know for a fact that they allow both high school and middle school to go around during school hours saying the f word and won’t do anything about it. I don’t know about the elementary which makes it super hard to maintain proper language at home. Most likely the school won’t do anything but I agree it’s not appropriate for the profession.

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If this is an every day thing I’d definitely say something. Its super unprofessional. But if it was a one time thing I’d just ignore it.

Let it go. Could be worse she could have called them little a holes. Now would I do it ??? Definitely not. Is it professional? Most definitely not. I’m sure she’s heard worse at the grocery store or walking down the road. We just have to teach them that those words are not nice words.

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I’m sure she’s heard worse. Get over it!! I bet them kids were acting out. They say hell in church! Gotta get ya head from between ya cheeks hahaha lmmfao I thought u were Gunna say they called the kids little fockers or bytch but no the word Hell that’s in the Bible little miss perfect parent!! Buckle up because u just don’t know what’s going on from the children themselves from 1st grade on. The children are cussing at each other talking about sex and even experimenting in the bathrooms . I have dealt with elementary schools up and down the east coast. They are all the same!!

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Some people get overwhelmed… some people wake up in bad moods… some people are going through shit you have no clue about.
Let it go. Maybe she had enough and no one was listening. It takes guts to be a teacher, spending all day with what, 20 other kids… I couldn’t do it. Those aren’t even swear words, maybe they aren’t nice words, but they aren’t swear/cuss words…
Let it go…

Yeah the ways kids are today I would be pissed also. What she said was nothing to go trying to get her fired for. Kids need to learn to listen but then again why should they if their parents are going to run to their defense instead of correcting them. Sounds to me like they all were out of control her’s included.

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I think you’re overreacting a little bit. They will hear much worse in the real world. Pick your battles.

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It’s your kid if it bothers you talk to someone at the school maybe so they can take not if it escalates to something else. Good luck

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If students get in trouble for using bad language then I don’t see why the teacher shouldn’t be reprimanded for her behavior. She is supposed to set the example for her classroom. If she is inappropriate then chances are her class will be too. Just my opinion.

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If she doesn’t learn it from the teachers, she’s gonna learn it from the kids. Kids these days are saying far worse in front of their parents, with no consequences. Welcome to 2022, I guess lol

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Fuck no. Say something to the teacher, say something to the principal. Do something. My kids have and will continue to hear cuss words from me. But I will be damned if a TEACHER spoke to my kids this way. It’s SO DIFFERENT than hearing it at home or in public. I personally don’t feel it’s okay to curse at anyone’s kids, ESPECIALLY in a professional manner. Got me fucked up, I’d be raising hell

I mean at least she’s not belittling them or anything. Let’s be honest kids piss us off… try dealing with a bunch of rowdy kids all the time…

I’d say something. Not to get anyone in “trouble”, but simply because some kids don’t ever hear language like that. I personally wouldn’t be bothered, but someone may be.

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Gets much worse in middle and high school

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Kids better act right then

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Theye just words? “Hell” isnt a swear word and pissing is also not rly a swear word.

I’d let it go but we didn’t encounter teachers saying your pissing me off until middle school. Personally I’d say a lot worse but this is why I’m not a teacher cause sometimes those kids really do be pissing you off :rofl::rofl:

Neither of those words are curse words… :joy:
And staff members are human and can get frustrated with bad ass kids too :woman_shrugging:

It’s not really professional but can you imagine having that job? It has to be really hard. I can only imagine how stressed out the teachers must be. They’re understaffed, gun threats happening daily based on what I’m seeing on my FB feed. Then add to it the kids aren’t listening. I’d cut her some slack.

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Some kids need that. My coaches and pe teachers all cursed at us kept me in line

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I would be upset if my kids were spoke to like this in a school setting.

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does not matter what grade u teach, u do not talk to kids like that, especially if they are young and even middle school aged. Although some parents cuss and yell at their kids and think its ok so she probably falls on the latter. I do not think it’s appropriate but everyone has their own opinions and way the talk amd teach their kids but definitely shouldn’t be in the classroom.

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