When clothes are new, they’re handled by factory staff, they’re made, they’re packaged but not washed so you will need to wash them before use. All kinds of germs in factories.
Germs are everywhere. Airborne.
Either accept the used clothing, wash it and use it and be thankful for it. Or donate it to someone more grateful.
She sounds like a lovely person
I am a nanny to 9 grand kids, ages from 1 up to 12. I always buy used from sales, vinted, car boots. All of my children accept what I buy. They just wash it. I’m so pleased my kids are grateful for help
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The germ thing is you just coming up with an excuse, you think people would buy…don’t let this woman waste her hard earned money.
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The entitlement is real. Your the asshole. And your kids are going to pick up on that smh
PS COVID can be on those brand new items just as much as those used. People still touch, cough, sneeze ect, in the store, factory, truck it was loaded on…. You know how many people have handled those new items before it got put in the box or put on the shelf?
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Soap,water, sanitizer… If you had a little girl and then had another little girl would you put any of the previous child’s clothes on the new baby? Would you use the same playpen or highchair…etc? As long as the items are cleaned and in nice condition I don’t see an issue with used. Having new is nice but used is fine too.
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Everything I had for my little one beside her car seat/ stroller and pack in play and swing where used all her clothes and most toys just clean everything before using it…
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Oh my… They’re gonna eat you alive here!
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First of all there’s nothing wrong with wanting everything new with your child. Some like new some like used and some like both. So in my opinion your not the ahole. I bought a lot of new for my 4th baby (bed, swing, bouncer mostly all her clothes besides what I have saved and got from a good friend or two and a random lady who had twin girls which a lot had tags on it. She was 01/22.) she was my 4th girl also (I have a 13y, 11, 3, 5 months old) I’m a big thrifter and saver and accepter. Lol. I have outfits all 4 have worn. But I say just accept them and pass them on untill she starts asking lol…
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Nothing wrong with washing them in the washing machine
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You could wash the stuff then give it away .Or be grateful the woman is kind and thoughful.You sound a snob she might not have a lot of money and just wants to be a kind gran.Do not hurt her feelings other people would love to have someone like that in there life.
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Oh… you’ll learn 
I USED to feel this way too 
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Equipment yeah ok I can see your point but clothes can wash. Everything washes, and babies grow so fast.
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Um how many people do you think touch the used items when packaging and sending ? It’s your baby and you can decide what’s best but germs are literally everywhere. Plus baby items aren’t cheap . Me personally I’d just wash the clothes and use them especially if they’re in good condition . For example when you go to target and get "new clothes " how many people do you think have touched those “new” clothes . Probably hundreds hence why we have washing machines. To each their own. My opinion she’s just trying to help .
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If ungrateful was a person🙄 so many people struggling outchea and yet here you are
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I have a question for the COVID mess. Do you or your husband work outside of the home? If so what do yall do with the clothes that you wear to work? Do you throw them away OR do you put them in the wash and CKEAN them then wear them to work yet again? I understand for newborn and younger kids under 1 but after one they grow so fast. Before anyone comes at me for my questions I feel they need to be asked. I have a 20 month old who was born with a brain disorder and her father (my husband) works outside the home with the military as a savilion he has had to clean areas where they have come home and been exposed and had covid very bad yet would come home and get changed at the door put a towel on and go straight to the shower and everything got washed in hot and I mean as hot of water as I could get.
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Nah yall assume she’s ungrateful or rich or whatever. But there’s many things I didn’t want used from folks with My boy when he was born. Such as bottles, binks, bibs, baby mattresses, socks, caps, etc… and I wanted a good stock of onsies that were brand new because often times I find that when things come from goodwill or other places like that they are badly worn and will never fit your baby the way they did a previous kid. Not that you can’t find some good gems in the middle of all that but at the same time when some people have their first baby they want new things for them and there’s absolutely nothing wrong with that. I was blessed to have help giving him new things. I wouldn’t tell her though, I would’ve kept a few items and let her know you don’t need anything or let her know what you need that you wouldn’t mind being used. There’s better ways to be respectful and nice doing this without blatantly stating you don’t want her used things for your child. Considering she’s tryna be helpful likely and may not beable to afford brand new things, then yeah you could be much nicer about it.
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It’s your choice but. It’s horrible your letting her spend her hard work money on items you will never use especially right now with gas and coast of living being so high. She is going to continue to buy unless you tell her if you don’t your kinda an asshole just saying. Germs is a horrible excuse please don’t use this when telling her what you want for your owe child.
Who’s gonna tell? Girl, that’s what lysol, clorox wipes, and a washing machine is for! Stop being entitled and be thankful. Kids, especially babies, are hella expensive.
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Depends on if the used items are pacifiers and teethers or just yous and clothes? The pacifiers and teethers shoul always be bought new becouse of the germs but the other stuf is safe, just clean them before giving the to your kid.
You’re definitely in the wrong and definitely a huge asshole if you go behind your husband’s back.
Sanitation is real. It exists.
It’s okay to not allow secondhand items or clothes. Communicate with your husband and decide what’s best. Then tell his mother together.
Sense of entitlement much?
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That’s what washing the stuff is for 
Yes you are the a. You sound entitled.
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I love buying stuff for my kids from yardsales specially clothes. Kids go through so much. Your afraid of germs but imagine how many people have touched that brand new stuff in the store
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You can do as you please but when ppl can’t afford it, don’t complain nobody buys anything. 
It’s like nobody with covid coughed or sneezed on those clothes hanging in a store… No child rubbed their nose and grabbed the clothes rack. 
The likelihood your baby gets covid and gets seriously is less than 1%. It’s actually statistically zero according to Pfizers own data. If covid terrifies you like that, guess you won’t be going out much.
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After my first child used was my go to. Goodwill, hand me downs, used toys ect. I learned to save money that way. Everything can be sanitized if in good condition.
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WOW wash them and use them babies grow so fast. You do know they tell you to wash new items before using them in the baby don’t you?
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I do not understand the hate , nothing wrong with wanting new stuff for her baby , specially if she is a new mom, I did the same with my daughter, never bought used stuff, but my sister, a friend and I gave birth just months a parte and we passed out our stuffs .
Nothing wrong with buying using clothes if you are on a limited budget or if you have more than one kid , but judging her because she prefer new stuff is stupid and unfair:
I do think that she should talk with her MIL about it and let her know that she will not use the stuff so she can stop wasting her money .
And by the way, some stores sell using clothes as they were new , it makes not sense, for example why I will buy a used onesie for 2 dollars if I can buy a new one at the same price ?
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Gotta be your 1st child or either the entitlement is raging. Wow. Just be thankful, grateful. If you’re too good to accept used things, donate them. Many mothers would be glad to accept what isn’t good enough for you. J/s
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A few things no, you can find lists online of things unsafe to get used.
However most things, as long as they’re cleaned properly before your baby uses them, are fine. There’s nothing wrong with having used items. In fact some of my favorite baby items/outfits were used/thrifted/etc.
I would say you’re TA if you do tell her that. She is trying to do for her grandchild and telling her she’s wasting her money because it’s not new is just sad.
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Yes you shouldnt hurt the woman especially if her son said it to you as a sign of respect. They are just excited too and just had enough experiences to be practical in that sense. You dont have to use it just keep it out of her love for your baby.
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Honestly, yes. The majority of used things can be cleaned and disinfected. Besides, why the heck would you want to or ask other people to buy you super expensive brand new stuff that will only be used a short time when you can get second hand that is just as good. It’s all in your head, just be grateful. I’d be grateful just to have someone wanting to help. In the end, if you want brand new, fine, but buy it yourself, don’t expect others to do so.
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If you want new and can afford it then buy it yourself.
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So do you keep the kiddos in a bubble?! I mean there are germs EVERYWHERE! I get that you don’t want “used” anything but using germs and Covid as an excuse it’s just that!!!
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Oh man to raise children before they make their grand entrance. Once that baby is here and you’re going thru diapers/wipes up the ying yang. On top of the possibility of formula feeding. You might get humbled and realized how ungrateful you sounded. I seen a comment about new clothes be handled a lot. Kids running thru the stores. Hundreds of people touching them and adding germs after germs. Your point seems kind of invalid about used being full of germs.
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Tell her, she can stop wasting her money. I wanted all new for my first, I soon changed my mind. Most baby and kids stuff is all easy clean because they are just germy messy creatures anyway, kids are kids
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You sound like a spoilt little brat, you can wash the clothes as can the toys
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While I can understand certain things being new, I would remind you that there are many things that are tried on & touched all over that have germs already when you buy them new. Mentioning thus to your mother inlaw will serve 2 purposes, to make her feel bad & to cause problems with your husband. You get to decide if it’s worth it.
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If you want to spend all your money on new stuff then go for it. I took all the hand me downs I could get I didn’t HAVE to buy clothes for the first 2 years. I bought essentials new but most of their clothes were thrift or from friends. But I’m a cheapskate by trade I hate paying full price for anything. Tell her you want only new things for your new baby and don’t get upset if no one buys you anything that ish is expensive.
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You can protect them from germs all you want but at some stage they will lick the handrails of an escalator. It’s all downhill from there…
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Why beat around the bush….I think this is just such a silly thing. Clearly no one can make you change your mind on what you want or believe is best for your kids. Regardless if it upsets or hurts someone’s feelings you need to just tell them. Don’t be mean about it or make her feel like she’s less than you cuz she finds it ok and you don’t. But try to explain it in a nice manor how you feel and why you feel that way. Save her her time and money. Sadly even when it causes a fight or awkwardness it’s always best and easier to get it out sooner than later
You are wrong also you aren’t going to get covid from it. It dosent work like that 
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Wow not many moms have support for their child like this. How ungrateful.
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That’s maddness. She’s trying to help and there’s a thing called a washing machine. Unbelievable. Certain things I wouldn’t use 2nd hand but clothes wise up. U could just give them away and say nothing but she will say sometime I never see the clothes on the child that I brought and then there’s going to b issues.
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To be this spoiled, ignorant, and privileged.
I would love your mother in law. Send her my way. I’ve got 4 kids she can spoil and I’ll be eternally grateful
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I understand being cautious about your baby catching covid. However that’s why you disinfect & wash things. I hope that you do the same with your new stuff, because just as many people are touching those items, if not more.
I understand if you want all new items, but don’t expect anyone to gift you items if that’s the case. Baby stuff is expensive, but if you can afford to purchase everything new for your baby, more power to you! Just remember to disinfect & wash new items as well. 
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How about working on being thankful she’s even willing to help. Geez, how old are you?!!!
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Stop being a spoiled brat and accept it. There’s nothing wrong with used. And covid doesn’t work like that. Maybe give the stuff to another mom who would gladly accept it and you can buy everything by yourself 
.
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Just going to point this out, new items can also have bacteria on them. You seem selfish to a point. I can understand some items being new, but knock you’re self out if you can afford new items with inflation being so high.
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I’ve seen ALOT of comments like “you’re ungrateful buy the new expensive stuff yourself, don’t expect others to” as if she said I want her to buy me stuff just not used stuff, but that wasn’t the case here. I don’t think this woman is asking the mother in law to go out and buy all brand new expensive items…she’s simply asking her to stop buying used. It sounds like, to me, that she’s fine buying her baby’s items she just doesn’t wanna keep adding to a pile of things that will never be used🤷🏻♀️
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Join the buy nothing groups for my area, give these away, hundreds of families would love it
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I’m going to assume this is your first and you have no idea how expensive babies are bc the way they’re constantly flying through and outgrowing stuff. But hey if you wanna spend $500 every 2-3 months on an entirely new wardrobe I won’t stop you lol
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Wow! I have 3 kids and I don’t mind anything even when they were babies, that was already used. Whether thrift store finds or things from family and friends. Wash them up and wipe things down and good as new. The cost of baby items is ridiculous. She’s doing you all a huge favor by doing that. It’s less money you and your husband have to spend and it comes from the heart. Sounds like you’re being a bit much.
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I would not go behind your husbands back and tell your MIL. What you don’t realize he is protecting you from making a fool out of yourself and him. It’s embarrassing to him his wife is so petty and unappreciative of what his mother is trying to provide for her grandchild. Let her enjoy and if you refuse to use “used” items then donate them to someone who would appreciate them. Any reason you gave us not a valid one, you don’t appreciate the kindness of your MIL and only you think you deserve the best. Your child only cares they’re taken care of and could careless if it’s used. Good luck!
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you sound like a spoiled, selfish, ungrateful, entitled, brat.
There is absolutely nothing wrong with “second hand” baby stuff *MINUS car seats, due to safety, etc.
Kids grow through soo many things, so fast, “handmedowns” are great bc of this.
kids items are also pretty easily sanitized, usually. Kids are full of germs anyway.
How about appreciate the help & stop being so stuck up?
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You sound ridiculous. There absolutely nothing wrong with used items. All three of my girls had used items and all three use used items with their kiddos. All you gotta do is use a little Lysol all purpose cleaner and some elbow grease and all the gems are gone. If it’s clothes throw it in the washer and there ya go. From the sound of it, I’m going to guess you probably think you’re too good to do that also. Smh.
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Let’s be truthful here it’s not about germs in the least, it’s about you wanting all new because you view used as a sign of being poor. It’s your child have what you want, but just don’t expect others to break the bank for your want, have it on your dime. God bless your mother in law being thoughtful and selfless.
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Entitled are we. Wow!!! Very ungrateful!! COVID 
stop using that as an excuse!!! New clothes has “germs” on them too. But god forbid these kids now, get any germs. That’s why they are what they are now a days (soft, entitled little babies) Lmfao. Very SELFISH!!! Give them away to a more loving family !
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You do realize new items still carry bacteria on them right, from storage,people have touched them,some have probably been purchased and then returned etc…
Some items 100% should be new but clothes can be washed and toys can be cleaned (just like new items should be)
I would pass the items you have to a family that can use them not just let them pile up I’m sure I family in need of them would happily take them off your hands…
I think you should tell her in the nicest way you can that although you appreciate the thought you are not happy to use the items then it saves her wasted time and money
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Yes that’s wierd I don’t understand just use bleach wash everything appropriate gifts they don’t have to give anything
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It’s 100% your choice in what you want. New or used, that’s your decision. BUT… It was absolutely wrong going behind your husbands back. A fight or not, you needed to have that conversation with him, prior to telling her, whatever it is that you told her.
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You have every right to refuse. But it will definitely make you look stuck up and ungrateful.
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As a person that loves thrifting and second hand things… I understand your mom in law and what’s her thinking but having family who feel the same way about it like you do… I get you as well. Try to be gentle, try to be calm and loving but just tell her you want specific things for baby and would prefer to get it yourself from the shops. I swear she’ll understand that better than if you tell her its gross what’s shes doing. Set boundaries for your kids but please be delicate.
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You are the biggest, most privileged, asshole - remember, you asked. Apologize to both of them for being a spoiled little rich girl with zero real world experience. The rest of us can tell you’ve never had a serious issue in your entire pampered experience. Your child will survive thrift shopping, but I doubt they’ll mentally survive your expectations and high standards. Go get some therapy before you do real damage to those who love you.
Clean them if you are worried? Newborns grow too fast. Second hand is definitely best until they’re a bit older. I brought so much new stuff for my first born and she didn’t use or wear half of it before she outgrew them. My second and third I got alot of second hand stuff until they were 1 years old besides clothes I brought some new stuff but not much until they were 6months and up.
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Clothes at stores have germs too. Do you know how many times I’ve seen kid’s clothing on the floor in department stores, even under shopping carts with black marks? Guess what the employees will do before their shift is over—hang them back up. Also, sick people still go to the store and touch everything in sight.
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So do brand new items not carry germs ? 
Yes you are in the wrong for going behind his back. You also sound hella entitled and Ungrateful as well as mom shamy but okay
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Sure something’s should definitely be new (dummy’s, teats, bottles, the cot mattress etc) but in terms of blankets, toys, clothing etc there’s absolutely nothing wrong with 2nd hand or even more so (4th hand etc) if the clothes and other items are in good still serviceable condition then there really shouldn’t be an issue. Not like theyll be used for long anyways. Kids grow like weeds.
I think you’re being quite snobbish at this point.
I’ve been buying small items from 2nd hand shops or from people selling off things 2nd hand for the last few years (when I didn’t have kids/wasn’t pregnant) in preparation for when I did get pregnant. I’m currently 7 months with my 1st baby and 90% of their clothes and linens are 2nd hand
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Wow, every single one of you being rude of judgmental are awful😬 she literally wants to tell her to stop wasting money, if anything her husband is the AH for not letting her tell the mom that the things won’t get used and letting her continue to waste money. There’s nothing wrong with wanting all new things, if she’s willing to buy them herself and can afford to that’s totally fine. Just because some moms have to buy second hand doesn’t make her a bad person for buying new.
Lmao I had this mentality with my first until he was bigger than expected and never wore newborn or 0-3 month sized clothing and was wearing 2t size by age 1. Then I realized real quick how pointless it is to keep up with brand new items for a child that grows faster than a weed my second and third wore all secondhand/thrifted clothes from birth to now. for a reference my oldest is 16, middle is 13, and my youngest is 3.
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I wouldn’t use 2nd hand either and didn’t when my twins were born, doesn’t make me selfish, entitled or spoiled Brittany Nicole
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I wish I had family willing to help but stuff… even used. You’re ungreatful. Especially with no thank you… kids don’t care wtf they wear it could be brown and green with mismatched socks, they do not care. You will regret when ur children are materialistic… and declining your help in ur retirement age and trying to get then stuff used from second hand/garage sales/and thrift stores because you want to give but can’t afford brand new…
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Wow. You have a unique perspective on yard sales and garage sales. I kind of like going to stuff like that. They say one man’s trash is another man’s treasure. I’ve found clothing at garage/yard sales that had never been worn. The tags from the store were still on it. It looked like they bought it, decided later they didn’t like it, but it was too late to take it back… so they put it in the yard sale for a fraction of what they paid for it. I used to get quite a few of my kids’ clothes that way. I’d always wash things before they wore them, but it was a good way to get what they needed. It’s a good place to pick up play clothes for cheap too. I spent quite a few years as a single mom. I needed all the help I could get!
Babies don’t use stuff long enough for it to be a problem. With my youngest who was a surprise all her clothes the first year were thrift finds or hand me downs. I was grateful for everything I was given. You seem like a snob.
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Just donate them she’ll never know. Geez entitled much hope your a mum of one
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You have issues hun. Most people can’t afford new, so bit unfair knocking it. I’ve given and sold and give away plenty stuff second hand. Its been like new. Babys grow quickly. Grandmas trying to help
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I wish I had the money to buy everything new. I sanitise and antibacterial everything before giving it to my kid. Also you know germs and bugs come in containers of clothes bras and foods
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Do not go behind your husband’s back.
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Holy cow, you sound so shallow and ungrateful. If I had someone helping me out when I was a single mom of 3, I would’ve been eternally grateful.
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Wow, I hope you never have to use used clothes because you have no other choice. You do not realize how lucky you are.
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I agree with your opinions of used items… tell your husband he needs to tell her because it’ll be easier that way… if you do it it may cause some petty issues…
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Honestly not stuck up, not ungrateful. Kinda rude you went behind husband’s back though. You just want what’s best for your kids especially if you never had the new stuff growing up, totally understand. I’m the same exact way, I just give the stuff away to someone else or take it to a goodwill, I may not use it but someone else will🤷🏻♀️.
You’re not selfish, entitled or spoiled. If everyone could afford new things for their kids they’d feel the same way…
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You sound like a new mom
Depending on what it is, mainly car seats I don’t like buying used. But other than that I’m happy to get thelp with kids clothes and what not. And just an FYI even clothes at stores have germs. My mom is nice enough to washing things she thrifts for before sending it to me.
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You ever heard of washing/ disinfecting??
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Have to ask if this is this your first baby? I had similar mentality with my 1st, at first. Yes l agree some things should be new, dummies, mattress etc but really babies grow SO quickly, you are better off with good quality 2nd hand stuff. What are you going to do with YOUR babies things when they grow out of them…are you going to put them in the bin (so wasteful & bad for the planet) or will you clean them, pass them on to friends/family or donate to charity???
Look at it this way 2 identical outfits - 1 on a hanger, never been used £50 (or $50),
the other also on a hanger…pristine condition was worn once for a photoshoot for 1 hour costs £10 (or $10) which one will you buy??? Use your brain and save your money!
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Hope you married a rich man. You sound like a spoiled ,ungrateful snob
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You sound like an entitled snob
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I’ll bet you were a pleasure in your teenage years. The message you’re trying to convey is lost in translation because your delivery leaves something to be desired. Go right ahead and side-step your husband then speak to his Mother with that brash vernacular. I bet it’ll only happen once.
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Maybe if you told her that you don’t need more things, you have enough already. That way she won’t feel bad. Maybe she can’t afford new items or just wants to help out. Or you can just donate what she gives you.
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Something tells me she is SAHM and husband keeps her.What would she do if they split up and she had to support herself and baby? Her attitude would change real fast. By the way,soap and washing in hot water kills COVID,stop making excuses and get over yourself.With the economy the way it is,you should be THANKFUL she does this for you.
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Wow!! If you wanna be so selfish and snotty then grow a backbone and tell her how you feel…oh wait your hubby says no? 
btw “new things” are just as contaminated by those scary germs you might get from second hand goodies!!
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By the way, hundreds of people touch clothes in the stores every day,just sayin’.
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I personally don’t see anything wrong with not wanting to use used items. It’s your children and if you’re not comfortable with it then you’re not comfortable with it 
It’s your child, no one else’s. I wouldn’t even listen to the people in these comments.
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Honestly second hand stuff will save the bank drastically, not going to lie my sons belongings are all about 60-70% second hand stuff, it’s saved us a fortune and you’d never know his stuff isn’t new. No adult knows the different between new and second hand let alone the baby. She’s being helpful, sterilise the items and they will be perfectly fine!
I personally just don’t use second hand dummy, teat, carseat, mattress
Maybe a bit of an AH
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Can you say thank you and then donate the stuff to someone who may need it? That would save the relationship and get rid of the stuff. 
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Almost all of the stuff I got for my son who is almost 2 was preowned I just washed it after I got it regardless if the person who gave it to me told me they just washed it just to be safe. I wouldn’t take stuff it it had bad stains because babys do have diaper blowouts and it stains badly. If you can afford to get new stuff then that’s up to you but I myself am very grateful for being given items for nothing for my baby. I’m also in a small town where there’s next to nothing for baby stuff unless we make a 4-5 hour drive to the next city. If your MIL gives you used items you do not want I suggest bringing them to a thrift store for a donation or give them to someone who needs it because it is a life saver for lots of people who are low income!!
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I can understand wanting certain things new because you want them to be sturdy/safe etc but I don’t think there’s anything wrong with second hand. If you have the money tho to buy all new every time you have a kid go for gold, just donate the second hand stuff to someone who might actually really need it.
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Omg, girl bye. You’re so nasty.
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