Unless she was left with food or unsafe toys etc I don’t see how she can choke & if she’s strapped in properly…I think ur overreacting…it’s not like she went to the store or something & left her there & yes I’m sure she was checking on her…all she did was start dinner…mabe so it could be ready 4 u when u can home. ? & u wouldn’t have to do it after a long day…cut her some slack
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Hire a baby sitter if your not happy … Keep tagging on MIL and your going to be alone… Your married to her son and he is still alive,he survived his childhood with that mother… Shes an old school mother …
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Definitely overreacting. You obviously don’t trust your mother in law so now the choice is yours
I’m guessing this is your baby just by how you’re reacting to the situation. Baby in perfectly fine in a jumper and fyi you married her son and obviously he survived his childhood with his mom raising him.
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I was raised in the 70s. My mom just told me a story the other day about putting me down for a nap in my crib, then going out to mow the lawn! She said when she came in, I had been awake for a while and she had been unaware. It never occurred to me to be upset… Seriously, I think you’re over reacting.
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Maybe she should have had the door open and the fan off so she could hear. Anything could happen. But I would talk to her and tell her you weren’t comfortable with her not being within earshot of the baby or at least have a baby monitor. I work in daycare and have seen and heard too many babies choke and if any of these teachers were farther away they wouldn’t have heard these babies choking.
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Then go pay a childcare provider to watch your kid. You should be grateful to have a Mother in Law that is willing to dedicate her time to watch your kid.
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I don’t think you’re overreacting. If seeing your baby alone, even though she was contained, made you upset, nobody can take that from you. I would have been a little freaked out too.
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Nobody is gonna sit with their eyes on the baby 24/7. Not even you. You said baby is 5 months and was in a jumper?! So your 5 month old can climb out of a jumper?! If not(which I highly doubt) there was no danger of baby choking.
I think the only issue is she didn’t leave the door cracked to hear if baby was crying.
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Time to put your daughter in daycare
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I think it’s not reasonable to expect her not to do things while she’s watching the baby because you still have things to get done. With that being said, depending on a few things, I’d too feel uncomfortable with her being outside. Like was your daughter near the sliding door where MIL could literally look up and see her? If so, that’s a non issue to me, if she was in a different room with no way for her to even see her I’d understand asking her to stop, def would advise a baby monitor either way
Yes, you are definitely TA. You expect her to just sit and stare at the baby all day? She can’t make supper while the baby is there?
how do all of us do it that have more than one kid? This isn’t something to get upset about. Choose your battles wisely. She’s already raised a baby or more, she knows what she’s doing.
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Not wrong. Find a new sitter. She will keep doing it
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This is your first baby isn’t it? You need to learn to multitask around babies. It’s unreasonable to expect to be staring at your baby 24/7.
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Definitely TA here. Baby was left in a safe area. So you don’t expect anyone to cook while watching a baby? How to you expect any parent of more then 1 child to survive?
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I just think you should find someone who meets your standards of a sitter.
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You aren’t overreacting but now you know its a problem. So now you can decide to give her another chance after talking to her about it OR find someone else.
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You’re in fact the 
hole
You are definitely overreacting. You cannot ask someone to help you and then dictate how they do that. Your baby was fine.
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If I were the MIL and you complained about it, you’d better be finding a sitter up to your expectations and never ask me again.
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Yeah you’re the AH. And then why don’t you provide her with a monitor then? And can’t cook or do time consuming activities? Is she “allowed” to take a dump in your mind? 
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Are you serious 
Yes you are overreacting. You act like the baby wasn’t in a safe place…
I mean it would be different if the baby was in the bath and she was outside but come on… be grateful you even have a sane mother in law to watch your kid… go get her a thankyou card and stop complaining 
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When I was growing up, my mother left me in a playpen with some toys all the time. Babis don’t need to be watched every second. It’s actually unhealthy because they learn very early that they should never be alone. This leads to separation anxiety, helicopter parenting, etc.
These days, most babies have monitors, but if she’s checking in on your baby regularly and your baby is in a safe place, then what’s the problem?
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I would get a baby monitor for her house. Idk why she didn’t just take her outside with her in the jumper - bc wasn’t checking on her that often if she didn’t come inside during the 5 min you waited inside to see if she would.
So buy a monitor for her to use
I mean your husband is ALIVE soooo your child was safe:woman_facepalming: if it’s not the 1st time she hasn’t watched her grandchildren up to your standards then PAY someone to babysit…
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You’re overreacting in my mind, the baby was safe and had nothing they could hurt themselves with. I was a single mum with my first and sometimes they need to be away from you. Would you rather she took your baby over to the grill? She was safe and allowed your MIL to do what needed to be done. If she’s cooking or working somewhere that could potentially be a danger to the little one then placing her in a safe space while she does it is actually a great thing you can’t stop when things need to be done and she took the measures to keep them safe, maybe she could have left the door open, but if its really or windy then I can understand the indecision in keeping it closed. Remember, this isn’t your MILs first baby, she would never put her grandchildren in danger on purpose
I’m in UK. I read several comments before I realised that baby hadn’t been left alone in just a pullover! 
Your baby is alone while you sleep, go to the bathroom, cook etc. I presume? 
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Yea, you’re overreacting. Do u really expect her not to cook while the baby is there?
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Your the one over reacting. Nobody watches a baby every minute of the day. If that is your requirement, you need to stay home and watch him yourself.
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She has more experience I’d say than u do? But… You must communicate the issue you are having with her, shutting down and getting angry at her isnt going to fix anything.
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I’m going to assume this is your first child so I get why you’re seeing red but yes this is a bit of an overreaction. If you’re daughter was in a safe child’s jumper, unable to reach anything dangerous and not crying or distressed when you got there, I don’t see the issue.
If you expect your MIL to have eyes on her 24/7 then buy her a baby monitor. You can’t expect her to do absolutely nothing during the day whilst babysitting - do you do this at home too?
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I would have waited to see how long before she checked or came in. That would tell.
hire a nanny then or give her your manual
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Watch your OWN BABY!!!
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Yes, I think you are overreacting.
Do you never step away to prep dinner or use the bathroom?
If she was safely in the jumper and up where she couldn’t put anything in her mouth, get into anything or be trampled by a dog then she is safe and will be okay for a few minutes while she stepped away.
If you are that scared of her not hearing her, buy her a video baby monitor so she can see and hear if she needs to step away for a minute.
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Lmao
Super Entitlement in a mom post
She was cooking, How do u even expect to do things? Is ur house a mess, no meals made, no shower? Im just curious. Kids have to be content in a spot they are safe for things to be done. Its life. Sounds like ur having anxiety Or separation issues. Talk with her, Or don’t leave the baby there.
Come back to us after the second kid and let us know how much you’re still able to hover
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Yes you’re over reacting.
My thing is the mom watching her 24/7 when she has the baby people cannot watch 24 7 got to eat go bathroom clean house bathe overreacting in my opinion now if she left baby while going in car another story ,but in Germany my german neighbor would leave her new baby in carriage outside in baack yard while she took dog for a walk
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She should be pretty safe in the jumper. I wouldn’t mind she was still close by watching her and the door is glass?! I think you’re overreacting, maybe buy her a monitor if you’re really bothered by it but I don’t see the issue.
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Get her a monoter or get some1 else 2 mind her or U stay home @mind her 
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Oh girl. You are overthinking this and shouldn’t I’ve her a break. The baby was fine and safe in the jumper in my opinion
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I don’t mind if someone is doing something else, but not being in earshot is where I would draw my line. I’m a mother of 3.
Omg stop ur self!!! So u do absolute nothing while u have ur baby alone???
I’m guessing this is your first baby. I wouldn’t say your the TA but definitely over reacting.
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I would suggest buying her a camera with a monitor so she can use it to keep an eye on baby
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Stop and really think about this … would your reaction be the same if it was your mother instead of mother-in-law? Answer honestly.
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I do not think you are an Ahole. I think this is your first baby. I think you are more nervous, watchful and afraid than mothers with more kids are or would be. If nothing happened you can let this go. But hire daycare if you are that concerned.
I would have put her near the window where I could see her from where I was. It is impossible to expect she gets nothing done all day!!
Honestly sometimes I have to leave my baby unattended to get things done… 5minutes would be my limit without checking. Not cooking while watching a baby is a pretty ridiculous request though, but having a chat with her and letting her know your feelings, she may be able to help you overcome some stuff as a first time mother or look for other childcare options that suit you.
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Yeah maybe you should be watching your own kid instead
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You need a reality check . I’m curious do you stay up all night and watch the baby sleep ? If not you need to if you’re that concern . More babies die from Sid’s than choking every year !! Omylord !!!
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If I was doing a chore outside I would take the jumper and baby out with me. I have a rule - if you can’t see them directly you must be able to hear them, and sight them often. I get stressed if my partner has music on too loud that I can’t hear what my 3 kids are doing. I know every sound in this house 
But I wouldn’t necessarily be angry about it or say she can’t watch bub anymore. Babies are okay on their own for short periods of time if they are in a safe environment…you are allowed to put your baby in their cot etc and walk away out of earshot for a while if you need a mental health break, things like that. Leave them in a jumper for 5-10. It’s okay.
Is she supposed to stare at your baby all day?
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Omg…I went to the bathroom ON ANOTHER FLOOR when my grand was sleeping in his bed…it took me 8.62 minutes … I’m so glad the baby didn’t cry or die! Smh. God forbid someone need to eat food or anything. Good Lord. Yes you’re TA. Calm down! Must be your 1st.
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You’re ridiculous. You’re overreacting and need therapy. There ya go.
Just buy her a baby monitor show her how to use it and move on with your life. Otherwise lose out on the free babysitter. Your choice.
The baby was in a jumper and being checked on periodically had you not gone outside she probably would’ve been about to go check. Get over yourself. Side note this woman successfully raised your husband and her other children without a problem. Stop being a helicopter cuz you know dang well you are not with your child every second of every day when you are home with them.
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Buy her a baby monitor. If you want her to watch her then let her watch her.
Soooo ur there and expecting ur MIL to watch ur child?
Is the babysitting free? If so you need to chill! 
You are NOT over reacting! Maybe if the door was open so she could hear the baby cry or bring them outside with you!
I am a true believer in the what if’s and prevention.
Establish what makes you anxious and how that scares you. 
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What baby is in a jumper at 5 months? Babies can barley sit up by themselves at this age. Let alone standing or bouncing on their legs for a long period of time.
Holy moly…I am a pretty easy going grandma…but you are NOT over reacting. In a nice way, you just need to let her know that made you VERY uncomfortable and that it CANNOT happen again or you can just bring the baby to visit with her and not leave her alone in her presence.
Just get yourself a reliable babysitter then
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Idk if I’d call you an AH but I definitely think your overreacting big time
I’m so sorry but yes. I believe you’re overreacting. Are you an a-hole? Not necessarily. Is this your first child? I can remember worrying about the littlest things too. That is so normal. You will learn in time that this is just what you do. You check on your baby frequently but you still have to function. I grilled when my children were little even in the winter time and it wasn’t anything new for me to put my baby in the playpen or their jumper to go make supper. As long as she was checking on the baby it should have been fine. If you keep your eye on your baby every second of the day you will never get any of your work done.
Some people are more confident than others to leave a bub alone for a bit. But my question here is have you communicated your expectations? It may be a case of yes she was checking on baby and she’s comfortable in doing that because that’s her experience with children. You may have a totally different view or experience or values around how you want to be with your baby or what you’d like from others who are with your baby. Some times you do really need to make it clear to people because they aren’t a carbon copy of you. If you have have communicated what you expect then yes be mad she’s deliberately ignored that. If you haven’t…go back and tell your MIL that this upset you because… and I’d be far more comfortable if you could…
I dont think you’re over reacting by the way. I get it, I just think before you write her off, talk to her about why it’s upset you and see if theres room there to fix the issue so you do feel comfortable with her watching baby for you. Only an asshole would say no im not doing that lol its not her child so im sure she would likely be happy to do things your way if you bring it up with her. Provided she’s not a monster mil
Yeaa…you’re definitely kinda over reacting. She didn’t leave the house and go to the store or anything. Unless you have other options for a babysitter then I wouldn’t press this issue. And even then, having someone keep eyes on the baby 24/7 probably isn’t gonna happen. What about if she has to use the bathroom? Do you take the baby with you to the bathroom, shower, etc. too? The baby is in a jumper and she was right outside the door. The baby wasn’t crying. Pick and choose your battles. This one isn’t really worth it.
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She’d never “watch” my child again. Ever.
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New moms are inherently nervous. Your MiL is a seasoned parent. She did what many of us have done. Leave our child alone to entertain themselves safely. The child was fine and safe.
Take a deep breath and realize that your MiL loves your daughter and is taking good care of her and making memories with her grandchildren.
You could ask her to use the baby monitor if she’s going to be outside so if baby needs her she can go inside quickly.
I personally wouldn’t have an issue with it. I also probably wouldn’t have let my presence known. I would have just hung out with my baby until she came in. That way I’d have more of an accurate estimate of how often the baby was being checked on. If it’s anywhere between every 5 to 15 minutes, fine. If it’s been 45 minutes to an hour I’d be weary. You also can’t really expect for her to not do anything else. Especially cooking. Maybe suggest that she move the bouncer closer the area where she will be doing things. She probably could have moved the bouncer closer to the door and left it open a crack, or maybe even brought it outside. If it makes you more comfortable, buy her a monitor. She raised your spouse and they’re still alive right? Have faith in her. She has experience. She may not do things the same way you would, but I highly doubt she’d intentionally put her grandchild in danger.
5mo is definitely still too young to be left alone in a jumper unsupervised. Not only was the baby unsupervised, but she had no way of knowing anything. What if the kid fell asleep with its head slumped forward and suffocated? What if the kid choked? There’s no way of knowing because she can’t hear or see the kid, and checking every who knows how long is too long for suffocation.
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YES !!! You are a drama Queen , you can’t expect someone to watch your baby and doing completely nothing while doing it .
Your baby was SAFE in her jumper , if you want someone to watch her every single second just WATCH HER YOUR SELF and problem solve
Or a. Sister. Or. An. Aunt
Well your hubby is still alive so MIL couldn’t be that bad. Sounds like a new mom here and nothing wrong with that but you literally can’t stand over your child every second. Buy a monitor and encourage her to use it if she leaves the room. Cameras threw the house she can watch them on her phone.
Personally over reacting… wait to youve more than 1 kid lol your back will be turned all the time
Yes, you’re TA. You’re being overly critical of your MIL and wouldn’t want someone being the same to you. What if the baby did cry? It may have taken a few minutes for your MIL to get to her but she would have been fine, babies cry. Did the child have something it would have choked on? If not, then why would that be a concern? The child was secure. Buy her a baby monitor. It’s your child and you should provide what’s needed. It’s unreasonable for you to expect someone babysitting to do absolutely nothing else. You should thank her for helping to teach your daughter to be content playing alone.
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Well buy a baby monitor and try not to be so mean to her… is she getting paid??
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I feel like most everyone has left their baby alone for a bit to do something when they were in a safe space being checked on. But if that’s not something you want the person who is watching her to do then maybe it would be better to hire a babysitter or someone specifically there just to watch her.
Then buy her a baby monitor…
Get her a portable baby monitor
You don’t want your MIL to cook while she has your child??? Do you cook while you have your child?
You’re overreacting
Heck I used to leave my newborn in living room with my toddler while I washed pots cooked tea now that’s dangerous
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I didn’t realize that you couldn’t cook if you had a baby. Wish I had known that.
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Lol MIL is likely doing all this for free too.
Find a babysitter so your MIL can be unburdened with your high expectations, otherwise it will affect your relationship
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I Left My Babies unattended Lots of Times…Back when I had My Kids,there was No Cell Phones or Baby Monitors…I Was The Baby’s Monitor…I didn’t have A Choice,If I Needed to Put My Clothes on The Line or go to The Corners Store…I Left them Unattended…I…
I love my kids soo much … i take all snuggles i can and it causes bumps in how we co parent… but i never watched bby 24 7… id of never got anything done.
I’m gonna guess your a first time mom at this point. It’s natural. With my first I worried over everything. I’d buy a baby monitor to give yourself some peace of mind while she has the baby. Giving the baby some short periods of time without an adult in sight is good for both you and baby. The baby will be less likely to struggle with separation anxiety and as a mom you are able to still do your daily activities. I used to set mine up in the living room and go about cleaning and cooking and just pop my head around the corner every few minutes to check on the child.
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No your not overreacting who leaves the baby in a jumper long period of time! Please speak with your husband babies can’t be left alone like that! Crib ok with monitor.i did my work at different times usually when baby slept and on monitor.
Relative can help out to till you get things done.
A baby can choke at anytime so it’s a big DEAL for me better safe that sorry everything else can WAIT.!
If you’re that concerned, don’t leave your baby you put eyes on that baby 24 seven that is a ridiculous request. You are obviously a first time mother. People have babies and still live their lives. You’ll settle down after your next one but in the meantime, don’t chastise your mother-in-law for doing what she knows how to do watch a baby and still live her life.
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5 minutes is a LONG time … to all of you who are saying
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Jesus so she’s meant to just sit and stare at the 5 month old the whole time… how on earth do u get anything done
Survivor of the late 80’s young mom here, I survived her!
The baby is fine, trust me, even if she can’t see the baby, she’s watching her. You think everyone had baby monitors years ago? Nope.
No you are not the A. that is your baby and the MIL should respect your wishes not hers. that poor wee tyke could have been crying for a long time and she would not have known with the door closed and her back to the door. She was obviously lying when she saidshe had been checking on her if you were there for more than 5 minutes and she never turned once to look. How many other times has she done this.
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Just let her know you are not comfortable with any of that and if she can’t respect it then she will no longer keep the child. You are mom and what mom says goes . She should understand and if she doesn’t then definitely find someone else . I’ve learned you have to put your foot down and be the bad guy or it will continue to happen and you will be walked all over until you burst and then they will probably call you the crazy one . 
Put your foot downnn mama !
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She can’t cook? y’all just gonna starve till the baby is 18?
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Do you pay your MIL to watch your baby? JW.
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Omfg 
don’t you run to the bathroom while she’s In it alone? As long as she couldn’t fall or anything she’s fine. You’re being very dramatic, would you have the same reaction if it was your mother.? Probably not. Be grateful she has a grandma that helps take care of her!
MIL I assume she raised all her kids and they lived? That answers that for me.