Maybe he need a Doctor to help hem out
Wish I could help. My oldest son is 14 so I can’t relate to help you. I remember dad taking my cousins privileges away. I’ve known some that has booted their kid out that was unruly like that since they thought they were so grown and boss. I would say therapist but you’d probably have a hard time making him go. His friends could be a bad influence and lighting this attitude he has. Hope you find answers.
Maybe there are psych probs manefesting? I was a jerk as a teen too. Turns out im bipolar. Punishment wont solve these probs as your brain works diff when psych issues are there. Try to take him to dr. All the rules/reasoning wont reach him if his brain is sick. Psych help is still making me a happier person everyday. Its 1 of those things that sometimes folks dont think about till its too late as psych patients look normal
He needs help, seriously, before he harms you…And He Will.
Sounds like there’s a bigger issue than just laziness… He might need a psychiatrist.
Get an eviction written up, give it to him at 18. Tell him he doesn’t do school, doesn’t work, so now he has to go. It will be hard. It will suck but he needs to wake up. He knows he can rely on you for everything so he will continue. Don’t give money, place to stay,…nothing. Tell him if he wants to be grown then he has to care for himself as grown folks would. You HAVE to pay your bills or lose your stuff. Show him it is life and he needs to wake up to reality. (When someone feels entitled and knows someone will enable them they will continue)
Choice. He’s deciding to be lazy. He’s deciding to be a jerk, he’s deciding to be disrespectful. He might have a weed problem so rehab(if he even cares to get better) might help. But no, everyone has a Choice to be a dick or be kind and appreciative and have a drive to make something out of themselves.
Ex. I have been depressed since I was a young teen, I have a chronic disease disorder since i was 17yr old…but I Never Lashed out at Anyone, I never leeched off anyone, I haven’t Ever Mistreated anyone. It was my Choice whether to be a piece of shit or to stay the kind hearted helpful human being even through my daily life struggles.
So in my opinion, kick his ass out because he obviously doesn’t care about your efforts to try and help him out and he doesn’t care about your feelings. Let him learn the hard way what adult life is like.
It looks like your a super loving mother and easy going. Your not in the wrong to expect him to at least be responsible and to pick up his own mess and fix his attitude. But don’t worry momma, he will have to learn to work with his hands rather than his brain. It’s going to be a tough road for him, don’t cave though. You’ve done your job for 18 yrs, now he needs to grow up.
What you allow will continue.
I’m sure you created this problem it’s too late now , sign him up for low income housing at this point because employment and education isn’t his options stop weakening your kids , then when the damage is done your out of options , I have 2 adult daughters, both graduates, both in college and employed , because I had a firm hand on em,
My sons 18th birthday present was the road. If he gives you any problems call the police. You may have to evict him but whatever you do hold your ground and dont give in. If he gets violent call the police.
Maybe kicking out isn’t the best option where is he going to go it’s clear he has something going on and maybe talking about it getting to the root of the problem would help and sometimes us parents can’t so we seek a therapist or talk to their doctor etc
Change the internet password and lock his phone off the modem and it’s easy to look up. Kick out at 18. At this point he can make his own food, do his own chores and don’t let him mooch off. It’s hard, but he’s gotta be cut off. And tell him he’s gone once he’s 18. And start taking things away so maybe it’ll Click.
Then if you seriously feel like you’ve done all you can do to help then change the locks
Kick him out he’ll figure it out real quick
when he turns 18 give him an eviction notice and be done with him , if you can legally do it before then do it , he isnt going to change
When he’s 18 change the locks and set his stuff in driveway, by allowing this to go on is harmful to rest of family,tough love
Who’s buying his weed since he doesn’t have a job?
Well you can’t cut him off because he’s still a child. But he sounds like he needs some guidance. I have a son kind of like this but he’s only 13 and he doesn’t smoke weed but he’s addicted to his PS5. He won’t go to school or do anything. I’m looking into pins. Your son sounds like he needs pins before it’s too late. Before he’s 18 and you can’t do anything to help him become a productive member of society. Get him on pins and into therapy, they will make sure he goes and then he can work on these issues. It’s hard I’m sorry.
Mother’s should be truly ashamed of themselves in this comment section. Clearly there is an issue here. Find the guidance and help you need to be able to give him the proper help before calling it quits on your child. Seek medical professional help.
I’ve been there. If he is being destructive call the police. Be stern with him. Let him know when your 18 you’ve gotta straighten up. You wanna smoke weed get a job so you can buy it. Don’t give him money. He steals call the police. Don’t let him get away with too much that’s what hinders them
Find a therapist and get the help you both need. You can’t do it alone and if he’s not violent maybe he’s just really depressed or has an undiagnosed mental illness. Start there.
Kick his ass to the curb, worked wonders for my daughter
He needs to wake up to real world. Do not baby him. Don’t give him anything else make him need to work. As adults we work for what we have. At 18 you could kick him out briefly as reality Che k
When he turns 18 call the police. They will explain to him that at 18 you owe him nothing and that unless he straightens up he will be removed from the house.
Pack his shit put it out front tell him to go in the military to grow the hell up
You owe him nothing at the age of 18 don’t be weak ! Kick his ass out then I bet he will get a job
Evict him and tell him your done with the disrespect issues and he will have to figure it out on his own.
Let him know that he is to move out when he turns 18.
Easy, put him on the street
He’ll learn very quickly
Kick his ass out!!! Stop enabling him.
At what point do you cut him off??? When he starts disrespecting you and your household… Like NOW! Stand by your rules if he doesn’t like them or doesn’t abide by them then he’s gone if he wants to cause a scene call the cops. no one should stand for being disrespected in their own home ever… By anyone! I get it he’s your son and you love him and you want only the best for him but Toughlove is still love!
Should have tried your hardest to nip that in the butt years ago. He acts like that because he learned it’s okay to do so. Y’all need therapy
Cut him off,there is the door. He’s turning 18 let him figure out the world will not cater to him.
Hand him emancipation documents. Tell him this is what it has come to. If you don’t want to listen to me as I try to prepare you for the real world you will be stepping out into shortly. You can jump now and began being your own adult.
Bills and house is crazy so get a jump on that and let me know if you need any help on those papers. You can not continue to live here and behave the way you are so what do you want to do son? If he chooses to stay and behave then set rules and chores as well as working and going to school. If he refuses to go to school then he has to work and pay bills.
Life lessons are the hardest when you don’t know what you up against. That’s reality!
See if you send him to a boot camp
Please please do not baby him. Be stern. You’re the mom. You’re the one in charge, your roof? Your rules. Do NOT baby him, baby him now, that’s how he will be and expect it to be. I’ve seen grown men 20s-30s being SO used to of their mom doing EVERYTHING for them, let them sleep all day do nothing, to this day. Stop it now or itll be harder in the future. He needs to realize hes not a child anymore. I’m sorry you’re going through this momma! Put your foot down! YOURE the mom, hes still yet a minor and under YOUR roof. Dont forget that. Put him in his place. Stay strong, best of wishes
See I’m sorry but that “tough love” shit don’t always work. And sometimes the kid even young adults are acting out for a reason. I can tell you sometimes it’s not just the kid parents have alot to do with the way they act to.
Let your yes mean yes your no mean no