Am I a bad mom for not spending Mother's Day with my kids?

Am I bad mom for leaving my kids for the day On Mother’s day my husband told me to go out, get my nails done, go shopping and spend the day dooing things i love so i did…i spent the morning with my kids before i left and the evenin we went out fo rdinner together…but my mother in law came to my house when i was gone and apparently said i was a bad mom for not spendin the entire day with the “kids who made me a mom”…and now i feel bad…i never get to go out because my husband works constantly and we do not have the money to pay a sitter…and now i cannot get over feelign guilty.

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Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. Am I a bad mom for not spending Mother's Day with my kids?

Fuck that I would have loved a day to myself lol

Dont let anyone ever make u feel bad for having some “you” time - especially if you never get too . She jus being salty lol

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Screw her!! She’s probably low key hating because she wasn’t in the Mother’s Day plan lol

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Absolutely do not feel bad about it.!!! You need time to do things for yourself, you are with said kids every other day.

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That’s ridiculous she is being over dramatic and undercutting the generous thing your husband did for you

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I mean technically, the man that gave us the kids are the ones who made us a mom.:rofl:

Mothers day is for the mother, not the kids. You should spend it in a way to celebrate you.
I’m sure you love your kids and spending time with them, but that time alone is equally important to you having a healthy relationship with them

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She called you a bad mom?? Nah. Nope. Notta. She’d be cut off for a bit. That’s toxic. You were out having a day “off.” You weren’t out doing drugs lol.

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Hell no don’t feel bad

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Your mil is an abusive shamer. Disregard her rant. You and your family celebrated in the way you wanted. Never allow anyone to shame you for enjoying yourself!

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You don’t need to get with your children every minute of the day to be a good mum.
It’s great you got a break, don’t let her crap bother you.

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No ma’am absolutely not. You are an amazing mom… obviously. Otherwise you wouldn’t feel guilty. Mother’s day is about you mama… every other day is about your kids. I really hope you were able to enjoy yourself!!! :smiling_face_with_three_hearts::smiling_face_with_three_hearts:

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For starters, your husband should have put her in her place the minute she said it. Second, Its not her business. They’re not her kids, she has ZERO say.

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No. That was a horrible thing for her to say. I hope she didn’t say it front of your children. Your husband should let her know that was not an okay thing to say.

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She can kick rocks!! It’s Mother’s Day, not spend the day with my kids day!!

if you spend time with the kids daily, then Every day is Mother’s Day.

To me Mother’s Day is to celebrate the mother. That doesn’t always mean to spend time with her. But to show you appreciate her… and if your husband is offering A self-love day, then TAKE it. Many mommas envy that hahah

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She’s a bad mother in law for meddling

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No, I took my kids to their dads house, he has normal visitations on sundays so I took advantage and relaxed all day because im pregnant and it was my day off work lol

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Your MIL is jealous!

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Did your husband defend you? Don’t feel bad. Us moms need a break to ourselves once in awhile!

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Your husband wanted you to get out to pamper yourself on your special day. Don’t feel guilty and don’t let what she said bother you. You need time for yourself too and it makes u a better mom for it. During that time you were able to breathe and relax for awhile so you won’t be so stressed and overwhelmed.

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You are not a bad mother , I am sorry you don’t have your mother in laws support

My husband and kid were out of the house most of the day because I wanted alone time for Mother’s Day lol

No you are not a bad mom. If you never get to go out you absolutely deserve to go out on your own and pamper yourself. There’s a reason that in an airplane you secure your oxygen mask first. Just like in life you can’t pour from an empty cup. Self care is a real thing

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Man F her. We work too hard to not be able to have a break!!

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There are two periods in life that typically depict how a person wants to spend Mother’s Day.

Little Kids = I need a break
Older Kids = Spend Time with My Kids

Nothing wrong with either of them

Your MIL needs to mind her business!

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Shut down it down!! You did nothing wrong. You spend EVERY day with them. It was your time and you are blessed with a husband that feels the same way!! Don’t let others tell you what’s right and wrong. You were given a gift for Mother’s Day and you accepted. Screw the MIL. As long as you enjoyed your time, and you got some YOU tone, which is what we all really want in Mother’s Day, DO NOT worry about what others say or think!!

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Absolutely not. You take care of your kids and one of hers you do you boo.

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Girlllll she’s just jealous!!! You DESERVE ME TIME EVEN WHEN IT’S NOT MOTHER’S DAY!!! TAKE YOUR JOY BACK!!! SHE’S WRONG!!!

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We are moms every single day, it’s okay to have a day to do whatever we feel like doing, whatever that may be!

Its mothers day. Not MIL day. You decide how you want to spend your day… Whether that be with the children or not. Your decision :blush:

Tell Mil to stop being so jealous and stay TF in her lane Where she BELONGS!! Don’t feel BAD for the GIFT your husband gave you :100::raised_hands::smiling_face_with_three_hearts:

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Absolutely not!! Mother’s Day is about spoiling your self and doing something for you too! If the dad took the kids out for a few hours and you did these things would you still feel bad? You took some time for you! And a mum deserves that! Do NOT feel bad! You spent some time with your kids that’s all matter and you had some you time! That’s it! In the nicest possible way your mother in law should mind her own business

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She mad because she doesn’t have the day that you had from the kid who make her mom… fuck her :joy: you ain’t bad mom you’re a great one taking some time alone for yourself :heart:

Wow, she sounds like a real fun time.

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your mother in law should mind her own business. You did the right thing.

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Don’t let your mother n law make you feel guilty. You said that you rarely get out alone. You did exactly what all of us need on Mother’s Day! Self care and pampering!

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Your mother in law was completely out of line.
It’s your day.

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You are a mother whether your children are beside you or not. Your husband was very thoughtful in giving you time for you. Don’t feel guilty for doing you for a few hours

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I hope your husband checked her. And I hope you tell her ass to stay home, don’t bother coming over with her disrespectful mouth

Don’t you feel guilty, girl. Sounds like a perfect Mom 's day.

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Don’t feel guilty He told you to go and that is so sweet of him and he should of told his Mom that it was your present to you

Dont mind her. Never ever feel guilty on taking care of yourself

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I’ll tell you what I’d expect my son to put me in my place if I talked to his wife that way. You need some time to yourself just as your husband should on father’s Day if he wishes

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No way ur a bad mom xo

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No mothers day I think it’s for celebrating mothers. You can have one day to pamper yourself. No MIL not right here. Good for you getting out on mother’s day.

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You pampered your self on mother’s day so you can feel a pretty mother when you went out for dinner with your kids. You did right! Just ignore MIL she is probably jealous. You did what you deserve!

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We need to normalize Moms wanting to not have to be with their kids all day on Mother’s Day!! Your day sounded like it was amazing!!!

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The best thing you can do is not give a second thought to what she says. Mother in laws always have something to say. She is probably jealous because that was never an option for her.

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Mothers day is about YOU, not your kids. Its YOUR day. Dont feel guilty for taking care of yourself

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Te day is about showing appreciation for our mum/carer.
It’s about spoiling them in whichever way suits.
You spent time in the morning and evening and that’s plenty

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Girl no don’t feel bad. It’s your day! You spend every day with them so on your day you should get a much needed break. Honestly I worked on mothers day willingly because I spend all my time with my kids and only work 2 days a week so that was my time to be to myself even though I was working. You deserved that break and well you MIL sounds like something else.

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At least you came back!:woman_shrugging:t6::rofl: everyday is mother’s day don’t let her make you feel bad for having a day of pampering as you should

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Heck no, she’s just jealous!!

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Seems like the kids are healthy, loved and have everything they need? Here is a little diagram for your mother in law to follow

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Omg yes you’re the worse mom for having time to your self!! Who does that!!

Nah just kidding, we’re moms we’re not dead we’re allowed to have time for ourselves and do thing for ourselves to make us feel good. Your husband choose for you to do stuff that would make you feel good: people seem to have this idea that once you’re a mom that’s all you are and for her to make you feel guilty over have time to your self is ridiculous. If she was so concern she should’ve took them for Mother’s Day :rofl:

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No, you should not feel guilty at all! Glad you did what you wanted! :heart::hibiscus::blossom:

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Screw her. You had a good morning and evening with your kids and your husband insisted. He knows you deserve some you time.

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We have to have a full cup to be able to pour into those we love. Her generation didn’t have that mindset or honestly, the luxury in many aspects to be able to do that. I would hope she didn’t say this to or, in front of your kids.

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Who cares what someone else thinks? Quit letting what others say about you dictate how you feel about yourself. There’s no right or wrong way of parenting or being a parent

You did the right thing. Married hard when in laws are trouble makers

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You didn’t do anything wrong. We all need some time to our selves and If your husband was ok with it then her opinion doesn’t matter :roll_eyes:

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Don’t feel guilty. It was ur day to do whatever you wanted to do. Ur mother n law should mind her own business.

Just you feeling bad shows you care. Do you mama everyone needs a break and this was your day.

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If Moms don’t refuel they get empty and bitter (cue MIL for an example) go have a great day, and return home with a smile. The Shrew needs to mind her own business.

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It’s your day. You do you. It’s not her business

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Since I can remember we always made it a family day. I couldn’t imagine not being with my mom and my children for mother’s day, but that’s just me.

No! She needs to mind her business. We mother’s work,care, nurture, worry, and educate our kids 24/7. We’re allowed to take an hour or so to ourselves. Especially if your husband told you to. Do not feel bad at all. She needs to butt out. I didn’t go to mothers day /birthday lunch this past Sunday because I was sick… my parents took my son… guess I’m a bad mom with you!

Lol I spent this year, for the first time, not spending the day with my kids. I went out for brunch by myself and I went to a winery. It was a beautiful day for some adult time.

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Your mother in law maybe a bit jealous. Thats her issue. Dont feel bad for having much needed alone time. Your husband had the children. They were in good hands. Ignore the mother in law. She can spend her mothers day her way and should show you the same respect. Much peace and love ☆

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My husband’s ex wife hasn’t spent mothers day with her children in 6 years. They are always with us.

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You have a husband who loves you.

Who do you live for, your mother in law, or yourself? Take time for yourself

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You still spent the day with he kids but, your Husband also gave you an opportunity to relax.

Your mil is a bitch. You did nothing wrong. Your husband told you to go out and spend time by yourself. He should have told his mum to shut up. You did nothing wrong.

What’s the name of your in law. We wanted to talk to her :sweat_smile:

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I spend every single day with my kids…my kids were with their grandparents on mothers day weekend…I ain’t even sorry.

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Your mother-in-law needs to mind her own business! Part of your Mother’s Day gift, aside from dinner out, was the chance to spend some time pampering yourself. You spent the early part of the day with your kids. Then you all went out to dinner. There’s nothing wrong with that. You got great Mother’s Day gifts. Don’t let her spoil them for you.

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Tell your mother in law to cram it and mind her own business🙄

If u are a good mom,giving yourself a lil pampering every now n then is fine.

does that change your motherhood when she said those things?

Please never let another person Especially at another mom make you feel bad for taking time for yourself.
Moms deserve breaks to! We spend every waking minute with our children, So you going out and spending a few hours by yourself, Isnt a big deal. Your mother in law is 100% jealous that she didnt get to do that when her kids were younger. Or shes just jealous in general and wants to belittle you for taking time for yourself. Dont feel bad for what you done, You deserved to take time for yourself. Tell her to mind her own business and to stay in her lane

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All the moms I know literally asked for time alone on Mother’s Day. :woman_shrugging: so he gave it to you. He’s a great man for that. Old women have a different view of things and that’s ok. But don’t let her make you feel bad. You deserve to spend the day how you want to and vice versa.

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I do believe they call it Mother’s Day and not kids day, your husband thought it was a good idea for you to get out and I have to agree with him, everybody needs a little time for themselves but I don’t have any kids, or a wife, and some might say that could be the reason? L O L

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Dude lol don’t let the boomers get you down okay :rofl:

I would’ve just about sold my kids if someone offered me this in return. No, do not feel bad.

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Mother’s Day is to make you feel loved and appreciated I think if that’s what you wanted to do and your husband wanted then enjoy it you have other days with your children

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Throw the whole mother in law away.

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You did nothing wrong! Did your mother-in-law spend her entire Mother’s Day with her children? (rhetorical question) :man_shrugging:t3:

Don’t feel bad. You deserve to treat yourself. Your husband support you. Mil probably jealous that she didn’t get a special treatment for Mother’s Day.

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Nope it’s your day… my and my mom took off for two days…. Went and played bingo and just left and had no worries. Did what we wanted because it’s Mother’s Day our day…. We have the right to have time to ourselves don’t feel bad. Do what makes you happy

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Ummm no you are not. Mother’s Day is supposed to be for YOU and however you want to spend it

This was a cruel thing to say about you when you were not home! It was unnecessary and unacceptable in my opinion

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Then she is a bad mother in law for not offering to babysit so you can have days to yourself :woman_shrugging:t4: or for you and your husband to have a date night when he isn’t working.

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You aren’t a bad mom. You got to have me time also. MIL needs to chill. Sounds like she wants to complain and nit pick at everything you do. Your husband was sweet to tell you and go out enjoy yourself

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I understand feeling guilty, I’m sure anyone would in this situation. However, I fully disagree with your MIL. I, as a SAHM spend 24/7 with my daughter. I love my child and of course would not be a mother without her. But for me, mothers day is a day for a break for me. No matter how that May look. Your children were safe with their father. You spent time by yourself doing things for you, and you also spent time with them throughout the day. It’s not like you just left and didn’t see them at all.

I visited my kid’s and ate alone