She sounds like she’s severely depressed!
Try getting her help instead of trying to take away her child!
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If she’s unwilling to sign over rights you’d probably have to call CPS on her and they’d investigate and remove the child if they feel she’s unfit. Then you could step in and offer to take the child, they usually try to place them with family if that’s an option. She could always get the baby back if she follows the rules set by CPS and proves she’s fit. Plus, there’s no guarantee they’d take the baby to begin with.
Maybe you could offer to let the baby stay with you for a little while without trying to take custody of the baby. Being tired isn’t child abuse and you can’t just take someone’s kid because you don’t like their lifestyle. Maybe it’s not the greatest for a child but that would be up to CPS to decide.
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Well it depends if she’s being neglected and abused. You just can’t gain custody of a child because you don’t like the way she’s being “shuffled around”. A lot of single parents have no choice but to have their children stay with family to go to work. I remember actually going to my mother’s work and college classes because my mom didn’t have family to help out, and my dad was out of the picture.
Try helping her instead of trying to take away her child.
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She sounds depressed. Try offering help in that area first. Therapy, A life coach or something. The last thing a depressed person wants to do is fully give up her child. Mental illness is real. Try to be a part of the village first before taking control.
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Wow, this sounds awfully judgy of a kid that isn’t yours.
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Honestly she may have post partum depression. Getting into therapy and to see a doctor could help her without having her child taken from her. Something to look into
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I believe you can have a guardianship or foster for a little while without her giving up her rights. I just had a friend do this for a coworker.
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You’re first action is to try and steal someone else’s child? Not offer help. Advice. Anything? You just want her child because you don’t like how she parents? Fuck. I have two kids. SorryNotSorry they’ve fallen asleep on the couch in their coat a time or two 
People need to learn to be a parent just like we learn everything else. Give her time to find her way. Give her advice since you have sooooo much experience and are so much better at it. But don’t belittle her because she’s tired and is trying to find her way. Ffs.
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I was literally so tired once I sat on my couch and leaned back while holding my baby forgetting that section of the couch didn’t have a back and I went flipping over backwards off the couch…I am far from a bad mum I felt terrible and guilty but unfortunately accidents happen it’s a part of parenthood
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You have no rights to that child. Of their was abuse findings and child was placed out of home father of baby then grandparents would b first in line. All though not respectful its not illegal to have goth creeps atound your kid asside from that all kids fall off something at some point and as for the winter jacket being mentally exhausted and making a mistake is a thing you have mentioned no actual abuse or neglect. Sounds like your brother is the daddy and u think your entitled to the child but it doesnt work like that
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I am seeing a lot of red flags in this post. And not because of the mother, because of the poster. It sounds like this mother just needs some love, support, and guidance as well. A mom being exhausted all the time, is not grounds to remove a child from the home. She’s a first time mom, and sounds a bit overwhelmed. Every mother feels overwhelmed at times, especially a new mother. And her going to her grandparents, is not going to be looked at as neglect. If the grandparents haven’t complained, or said anything, that is just a grandchild spending time with her grandparents. Sending a child to the grandparents is not illegal. And it’s also none of your business. You seem to be getting upset because she’s asking grandparents for help instead of you. And I’m not even gonna go deep into your comment about “creepy Goths”. I can’t judge a book by its cover. Just because someone is goth, it doesn’t mean they are a bad person. And to be honest, if there’s one thing I noticed growing up it was “the creepy goths”, were always the nicest people. People seem to also forget, that these babies aren’t gonna stay little forever. They eventually grow up, form their own thoughts and feelings. she will have questions, and she will want to know the truth and find it for herself. She will hear what you have to say as far as your side of the story, but she probably won’t want to find her mother if this did ever happen. I can tell you right now, that will lead to resentment towards you. It is not normal thinking, to look at a mother and search for things she’s doing wrong. You are looking for every excuse you can to take that baby from her mom. And even though she’s little, that will still be traumatic for her. This is not a situation that is taken lightly by the courts. And if the mother wants to keep her baby which it sounds like she does, you will not be able to just walk into a courtroom, terminate her rights, and adopt this baby.  especially with the complaints you have listed. Anyone with a healthy mentality, would genuinely try to help and support the mother. And I mean genuinely, not with ulterior motives and secretly looking for things to use against her to take her baby. I can see why you were not listed in the people she asks for help. No mother would ask for help from anyone for their child if the person is trying to point out all their flaws, make accusations, and try to take their baby. 
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Just wow! This is what’s wrong with the world! People over step into boundaries they have no place to be in! Instead… Help HER CHILD by helping HER BE BETTER! But then to with someone having a hidden agenda good luck with being trusted! People need help in this world not taken advantage of! Super sad!
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Get her help instead of trying to take her kid
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First. I take offense to the goth comment, you act as if goth people are toxic to children and dangerous. Now aside from being obviously shallow minded and the perfect mother you need to fuck off with the attitude of her not being good enough and offer proper love and support to her.
Maybe instead of taking the baby from her as your own, research getting her some help. ?!
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Help her instead of trying to take her child she clearly needs it, all moms struggle at some some point, glad I don’t have a toxic sister in law like you
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Call dss and talk to them they can get her help and they may let u keep the baby i know someone just went through this
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Wow sonrather then be of help to sister in law you would rather take her child away? Are you really any better then she is when you would rather not offer her help…you could offer to have the child stay with you so she can get back on her feet…why would you jump to wanting custody?compassion goes along way
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This mother needs support, not someone trying to steal her child.
There are so very many parents who are unprepared to be parents, who really struggle with it, but they do love their kids, and with some support and parenting classes, could be very good parents. But instead of giving them that chance, too often their kids are just taken, and funding is given to a foster parent to help take care of that child. What kind of changes would we see if that funding was put into helping support these parents instead? If it was used to get them into parenting classes, to help them find jobs, to cover daycare, to help with other necessities they may need, etc?
Children need to be with their parents, and should only be taken away if absolutely necessary. Everything should be tried first to help the parents be able to be good parents.
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Ask if u can keep her no custody after awhile she may give her to u do some sort of visitation
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You’re putting so much effort into trying to take this baby. Why don’t you put all this effort into trying to help your SIL become a better parent, instead. And I don’t mean by making judgmental and condescending comments about her parenting. I mean by offering genuine and loving advice and support. By truly being there for her. Help her get into therapy - it sounds like she desperately needs it. She may even have PPD. Offer to watch the baby during her appts. Maybe even offer to watch the baby for a weekend so she can catch up on sleep if she’s so exhausted.
There are so many things you can do to help support a new parent who is struggling. Threatening to take their child is only going to make things worse. 
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Since this is your sister-in-law I’m assuming that you’re married to her brother? What does he say about this? Is he on full board or does he think maybe his sister need some help because I would assume helping would be the first option. You may think you’re a wonderful mother but that’s only your opinion that child probably loves her mom and there’s nothing wrong between going back and forth between grandmothers because it takes a village maybe you should come into the village instead of standing on the outside with a pitchfork
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Nothing you stated warrants removing the child.
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Maybe tell her if she needs a good break that you’ll keep her for a while, and see how that goes. If she’s really not interested in being a parent, once she has all the time away, she may see that you are a better fit for the child. This is how I’d do it. That way she feels like you’re trying to help her rather than judging the situation or accidentally offending her with your opinions about her choices etc. idk that’s what I’d do though
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This just sounds like you mom shaming.
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The MOST important thing you can do in this situation is to go seek psychological help. For yourself. Find out why you feel a need to sit back and stick your nose so far up in someone else’s lives and make so many harsh judgements on others, that end with you being such a much better person surrounded by much better people, that you feel a need to take someone’s child from them. Why you feel a need to have so much control or influence in another person’s life. Why you feel that others should be exactly like you and do things exactly like you with absolutely never making a mistake in order to be a good parent and a good person. I mean come on Karen, I’m sure you’ve made plenty of mistakes and bad decisions. Of not you need to find out why you THINK you are so perfect. The next thing you need to do is mind your own business. Lastly, maybe suggest to someone else that she does trust and is NOT toxic that she speak with her doctor about being checked for a possible hormone imbalance, blood work to rule out any other possible health reasons, and to look into seeing if this could be PPD. Other than that, sit down and worry about your own life. Maybe get a hobby or a job because you got too much time on your hands.
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Just because she isn’t doing everything you do doesn’t make her a bad mother, sounds like you want to take over, you’re only offering to help sis in law if she signs her baby away? Where is the babys father? Is he not helping out? You making her out to be a bad parent but no mention of the babys dad. I’m guessing you’ve never been that tired whilst being a mum you’ve had accidents or made mistakes…
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Instead of trying to take her kid off her why don’t you guide her in the right direction if she is so young. Be a role model for her and your niece, not someone that she is going to hate.
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Have you tried to help her instead of just trying to take her kid from her? You sound very judgemental. It doesn’t sound like you actually care about her wellbeing but that you just want another kid.
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If you want to take that baby from her you have to be able to prove neglect. That is a long process unless the other people around her and the baby are also willing to say the same thing. She most likely is having a hare time transitioning to motherhood and has PPD. Instead if trying to take her baby from her how about you help her, support her, give her advice and be there for her when she needs someone to talk too. Being a mother doesn’t come naturally to everyone, and those are the ones that need to be helped.
I’m going with, OP wouldn’t have asked this question if the child wasn’t in danger. And frankly from all the “dark boyfriends” she has the baby around, the VERY real concern is abuse. Consult with a lawyer…ask for advice on temporary custody/guardianship (maybe Mom would agree to this).
FOR ALL YOU JUDGEY PEEPS… Y’all are bashing this woman for trying to do the wrong thing…did you miss baby was staying with a relative who may not be physically able to babysit (great-grandmother). And yes agreeing to “help” with the baby is great. The problem lies in (I have witnessed this more than a couple times, mostly with child’s grandparent) that the “babysitter” isn’t able to get the child some of the things they need, ie. health care and schooling. (You have to have guardianship to get medical attention for child, or enroll in a school among other issues).
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Everyone saying get here help her own mother Can do that if apparently she goes and drops off the kid all the time to not struggle if she wanted to get her self together she could it’s just excuses of being to tired to have feee time without her child
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I understand you want what’s best for the child, and what people failed to pay attention to from your post is the random men being around her daughter. A non biological male being in the house increases the chances of sexual molestation by 33%. Instead of requiring her to sign her rights away offer to watch her daughter. And try and set her up for success. Be a good role model. Invite her over for a play date, dinner, ect. Maybe she needs a mom friend or someone to model what a good parent looks like without judgements or criticism. Let her know you are. There for any questions she might have or if she needs a break
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Instead of offering her help, you’re trying to take her baby? You’re “all too happy” to get custody of HER baby. Major red flag on your part. Creepy. I hope someone knows who you’re talking about, shows her this post, she cuts you off and you never get to see her child again.
Learn how to mind your own damn business.
seriously help her instead of taking the kid away help her. and the comment about goths was uncalled for most goth are nice people who just like differnt things then you do that doesnt make them “creeps” or “bad”
ripping families apart is extreme and only needs to be done if there is abuse or neglect. come on do better
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Call Childs services, and go that route, there is something wrong, if you’re “ too tired” to attend yo the very basic needs of your child
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What I want to know is, she’s your sister in law how? That’s your brothers baby? And that’s your sister in law like that? So where’s your brother in all this? Or your husbands sisters baby? And that’s your sister in law like that? Question are you Hispanic or Latino? In which case this is a clear cut case of jealousy that your in laws care for your sister in laws kid more than yours and she gets to go out and do her thing and you don’t. Which happens a lot and it’s not that it’s ok but it’s also not your momma and not your business.
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I would just let her know her child is always welcome to come to my house.
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Invite her over frequently, or stop by hers. Let her nap while all of the kids play together, and during this time you can help around the house with cooking/cleaning/etc. Invite them all out to the beach/park/museum/sleepover/etc. Be involved and a positive influence in their lives. Help out. Offer to keep the little one overnight if she has plans or wants to go on a date. You can be present and help guide her in the right direction without straight up taking her baby away from her. She could have post-partum depression. She could be severely overwhelmed with everything, especially as a first time mom. Show her you care and are there as a resource.
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You sound like a judgemental narcissist right off the bat. “Dark boyfriends” because they’re goth, not because they have bad character. If she has a “new one every week” they are not around long enough to know, so sounds like you judging someone because they are different. Do you know how many parents in this world leave a jacket on a sleeping child? Hardly child abuse. Do you know how many grandchildren spend time with grandparents because single moms struggle with affording child care? Your solution? Jumps right to taking this woman’s child and her signing her rights over. Clearly narcissistic based on your claims. Offer no help other than give her to me I’m so much better. Nope. You definitely sounds like a judgemental hypocrite, because you’re clearly not perfect and possibly in need of some mental help. Not a single thing she mentioned would justify what this woman is seeking to do. If this mom was smart, she’d cut all contact of this toxic, judgemental woman from her life.
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You sound like a t w a t. Must be nice being in your shoes & having both parents in the home where you can stay home and do everything PERFECTLY. Absolutely nothing you said warrants taking her baby from her. How about offering some HELP instead of trying to take away probably the very one thing she can hold onto in her life?
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Instead of trying to take her baby offer your help. sounds like she is overwhelmed and might suffer Postpartum therefore offer to babysit the child to give mom some time alone, ask mom over to have a girls night, maybe invite her over for dinner or make dinner at her house. There are steps you can take instead of just trying to take her child. UNLESS her child is in IMMEDIATE DANGER there’s no reason to try and force the mother to give up her rights.Not to mention you can’t claim she’s a bad mom because she left a jacket on her sleeping baby nor can you say she’s a bad mom bc she dropped her child from being to tired. I’m not saying everyone has dropped their child from lack of sleep but I know a few who’s baby have fell bc mom feel asleep while feeding their baby. Me included. If my child was removed from me off that bases alone I wouldn’t even have him due to the fact every time I turned my head he was falling or rolling off of something. He’s almost 7 now. Help her instead of trying to belittle her mothering skills.
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I believe you should contact a lawyer and explain the situation. See what they say. I would also suggest documenting all of said behavior. I was a young mother myself, but our story was different. Had I made the choices you’ve portrayed this young mother making, I’d hope that someone would have stepped in for my children. It may cause waves, but what really matters is this child. Idk who you are, but God does. I’ll be praying for this situation.
Who is working to help support this poor woman who is clearly suffering and needs professional help?
Seems she has post partum depression or some other depression. Does she have a supportive partner who is trying to help? Is she doing it all on her own?
Does she feel defeated and judged and unsupported?
Maybe work to get to the root of the issue and partner with her to find solutions rather than just trying to take her kid.
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Sounds more like she might be struggling with PPD or other mental health. If she’s a single mom, she’s exhausted. Put yourself in her shoes for a second and stop trying to rip her baby from her arms. Reach out to her and ask if she needs help with house work, or watching the baby while she takes a nap. Be a better sister. You aren’t perfect.
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Nothing wrong with Goths, They are lovely people . Everyone has a past even me . No one is perfect, As long as the child isn’t being abused or hurt , I don’t see a problem
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Your sister in laws child as in…. Your brothers child? I’m confused.
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Maybe HELP HER instead of making her life worse.
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This was my mom she did this plus some every one of those strange guys that only lasted a couple days to years everyone sexually abused me from the time I can remember first time at about 3or 4 didn’t stop till I left home at 14 and never went back my mom’s whole family seen this they tried to get her to give them custody of me and she wouldn’t do it saying she needed the welfare she got for me I cried every day wishing someone would help me so please do not be that person that does nothing they tried the let me watch her and let her stay with us blah blah blah and she would toss me around to anyone that would take me so please it doesn’t matter if the different guy is only around for a week it doesn’t take a week to make your child accessible to them so please speak up for this chikd before it gets to that point
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Maybe she is depressed and overwhelmed. If she is single and not with a job she can provide for the child she needs counseling and a job traing/ education. What she might be doing is looking for a prince that will help her and we know it doesnt happen. Pell grants and SGLs would help her with college. Talk with her. She might give you guardianship and try to better herself and situation.if this isnt the case call CPS if you feel the child wellbeing and safety are in jeporady.
Offer to… babysit. Often. Once she’s comfortable with that, just keep her. If everything is as you say, the child will probably be left with you indefinitely. Once in your care long enough, file for custody !!
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Long road to taking another Mother’s child from her…and alot of Attorney Fees : she must be judged unfit in the eyes of the law and children services, a drug addict, causes harm and lives in an unfit home…been in trouble with the law and jailed for it…if non of these applied to this case…the child would most likely go to her own Mother or Her Grandmother,not a sister in law…You had better have a life that is squeeky clean , where you never get tired and wear dresses as you cook your evening meal to take this child from her Mother.
If it’s your sibling’s child, you should be able to.
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She would have to be proven incompetent, first.
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Yes you could possibly, children services should be involved. You can also file in court, make sure you have real evidence to show the court.
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How about stepping up and actually helping her instead of trying to take her baby away from her… You sound just awful. Help straighten her crown instead of breaking it. You sound like a real sh** sister in law. 
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Get a lawyer, have your SIL sign over temporary custody.
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Sounds like she needs help more than she needs her baby taken. She sounds like she may be struggling with depression. While i do agree its not great for her to constantly introduce new men into her childs life, you sound judgemental when you make comment about them being dark creeps because they are “goth”.
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File for emergency custody
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I had to help my niece and nephew out we started with me keeping the kids for 6 mths so she could work on her life , to her not working on the right things to then legally adopting the kids . I always left room in thier lives for her but she chose not to be there . I always held both my kids parents in the best light I could and let them grow up and sort it out when they wanted to . 32 years later I am still mom .
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Try to help as much as you can- offer for her daughter to come over every other weekend and a few nights a week- she may just ask you for more and more help it may evolve on its own if you offer-
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Why do you want her to sign the kid over? Just take care of the kid. If she finds that you can care for the kid well, she will always bring the kid to you. When she’s tyred, when she’s with those goth folk. Sounds like she might be on that ice:O
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Get lawyer. Seek guardianship.
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Child protective services would always rather place a child with a relative as long as it is a safe and nurturing home than in a foster care situation.
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help her care for her child; she may bring her to you always reach out she may be overwhelmed. she may offer guardianship
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Quit downing her and s*** talking her, damn yall a bunch a haters
File for emergency custody
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All you people saying to offer her help, SHE HAS PLENTY OF HELP!!! Clearly she never has her child if she’s being bounced back and forth between grandparents houses… she just flat out doesn’t want to be a mother. That child deserves better then that. I feel “trapped” too, but guess what, I have 3 children that I take care of every single day, and love them with my whole heart. I’m never “too tired” to take care of them. Stop making up excuses for her and start thinking about the well being of that baby! If she really wanted the help for her “problems” she would go get it. Depression comes with being a parent. Either deal with it yourself, or go get on medication. I hope that baby can live a better life then she does now. 
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Open a case with CPS they will help with the removal of the child if they determine she’s unfit then you can go through the court to gain custody
Why are you asking FB a legal question… That vary’s by state.
Based on what you’ve said here, no. If you truly feel theirs a serious problem, SEE A LAWYER.
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Goth creeps? You’ve got some nerve. Hope the baby doesn’t end up with your judemental a$$ too
Get close to her and help ! Maybe she is having difficulties the men thing scares me I don’t and won’t date because I’m to scared and have two little girls
Instead of being here, you should be in a lawyer’s office asking for legal advice, unless there’s a lawyer on this group, who can then advise you properly
This isn’t an issue for fb
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You personally would never be able to take her child. In-laws don’t have rights over family:woozy_face:If you call CPS all her children going to the state:pensive: All because she can’t find a steady babysitter 
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Yes you can if you can prove that she endangers her baby or nancaked the baby.
If you can prove she’s danger to her child
You could try get legal help
Or try convincing her she’s danger to her child
Good luck
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Raise it with your partner and social work
File for custody in your local family court. Gather any evidence you can to prove she’s unfit. Let the courts decide if you are correct or if Mom just needs help.
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Get a lawyer and they can help you file for custody. It all depends
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You sound judge mental and stuck up honestly. Just because you don’t like the way the guys she dates look or whateverNo you can’t get custody of someone else’s kid unless you are a parent or they voluntarily give up their rights OR if the state takes away their rights and you adopt them which is a very long road because they will give her chances to take parenting classes etc…
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check with a lawyer on the legalities of a action like this and wishing you good luck!
If she doesn’t Wana be a mom just focus on showing mom the pros on having you take her and maybe she will see it’s for the best and just sign off?
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Goth Creeps… wow. I wonder what they really look like. I was called goth for wearing a shirt with a skull on it when I was 13.
Have you even talked to her? Tried to help her? It sounds like this perspective is from the outside. Like a neighbor watching through the blinds. Lol
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Don’t believe in CPS!!!
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I take that back lol you sound like you just don’t like how tired she is not that she doesn’t Wana be a mom. Mom’s get tired. Everyone has dif amount of energy and baby’s are hard and tiring sometimes. Maybe you should ask why she’s so tired? Maybe your brother is the one not helping
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You just need to stay out of it yes we mommas get tired and yes mommas ain’t perfect but obviously she loves her child she just needs help instead of being selfish and try to take someone else’s kid why not try to help her maybe babysit the kid so where she can get some sleep or maybe just some time to herself. Women are not super heros and we can’t do everything. I think ur wrong for even wanting to take the child if the child is not being abused or hurt in any way then leave the mother and child alone. Yes she shouldn’t be having different guys around all the time but that is her child not yours
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Unfortunately I think you should let your husband her brother handle the situation. If the child is in immediate danger, absolutely step in. Try offering a helping hand or to take the kiddo a few days a week to give Mom a break, maybe she is feeling defeated from being a single parent. Just because you can stay home & give your kids what they need because your husband allows it, doesn’t mean his sister can. Be nice to her, help her and see where that goes. Goodluck. Ps CPS has been known to do more damage then help, so please tread lightly and offer help and not “take away” her kid, what happens if cps won’t place with you, foster homes and shelters are not the place for a little baby girl.
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Why don’t you ask your husband to talk to her and see what she needs? I’m not saying offer her money. Everybody is short nowadays and I’m sure you are too if you have kids already. But you could see if she needs someone to watch the baby a few days a week so she can get some rest… maybe catch up on her housework. Maybe she’ll let you watch the little girl while she goes out on dates. Don’t try to take custody. You won’t win and may get the baby put in foster care. Some of those places are awful. The adults doing the foster care are just in it for the money and the kids get the bare minimum. Just be there for the mother. Maybe show her a few things about taking care of kids that will make her life easier. That’s what you should do.
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Offer to help. Babysit. You’re reaction to this is over the top. She sounds exhausted and lonely. She doesn’t sound like a bad Mum at all. Where is your brother, the child’s Father in all this? You help other Mums, you don’t drag them down on FB, unless the child is being abused or neglected.
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Sooo, you don’t like her choice in men and she didn’t take baby’s coat off when she was asleep one time? I don’t think that’s grounds for taking custody. Why don’t you try giving her a little bit of support instead of demanding legal control 
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Maybe, instead of trying to take her child away, Help Her, offer to maybe have the child a night here and there.!!
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Why are you automatically jumping to the point of trying to take someone else’s child? So what that’s she tired and done things she regrets, haven’t we all? It’s not easy working and being a mom. She has the right to date anyone she wants to date! And you can’t judge people based on them being “goth”. One person might think having black fingernails makes them “goth”, while others think “goth” means the person is somehow into black magic or something way out there. In reality “goth” is actually individualism, tolerance for (sexual) diversity, a strong emphasis on creativity, a dislike of social conservatism. Being goth doesn’t make anyone a bad person, it’s basically how they dress and their belief systems. Why don’t you try being a loving, caring sister in law and offer to help her out when she needs it instead of trying to take away her child?
Yes! You can file for temporary custody if you feel the child is being neglected or is in danger. You will need valid proof. Period to back up your statements. I would call your local school, they can connect you with someone.
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Why are you automatically jumping to the point of trying to take someone else’s child? So what that’s she tired and done things she regrets, haven’t we all? It’s not easy working and being a mom. She has the right to date anyone she wants to date! And you can’t judge people based on them being “goth”. One person might think having black fingernails makes them “goth”, while others think “goth” means the person is somehow into black magic or something way out there. In reality “goth” is actually individualism, tolerance for (sexual) diversity, a strong emphasis on creativity, a dislike of social conservatism. Being goth doesn’t make anyone a bad person, it’s basically how they dress and their belief systems. Why don’t you try being a loving, caring sister in law and offer to help her out when she needs it instead of trying to take away her child?
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contact a local lawyer the little girl deserves not to be passed around to relatives and unless a man is a keeper she should not be around her moms dates either its great to spend the night with grandma and great grandma every now and then ( i am one) but she needs stability in her life
I totally understand your point, but unless she signs her over, which she probably won’t especially if she receives food stamps and child support, you’ll have to get tuff and prove neglect or abuse. They might let you foster… if you have a license for it, but getting custody is hard. You could probably take care of her, like an paid sitter, but you’re probably always have moma dearest popping in and out, messing up hers and your lives. Take you social services or even a lawyer, just remember once you do you’ll receive nothing but grief from the moma.