Lol like everyone is saying. Men don’t think like that. They are simple. Nothing is in their head untill they see it or are told about it (then they know everything 
) give him a chance!
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You’re being insanely insecure. Like everyone else says, I guarantee you he doesn’t even see that stuff around. Sounds like you got a keeper if he’s willing to reassure you every time like that.
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You’re very insecure. Please don’t make him feel bad for not grabbing every single thing and throwing it all away at once. Being together that long you’ll definitely be finding things. I was together with my ex for 5 years and never married and still found random things here and there that I ended up forgetting I ever had.
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Tbh I would just start throwing it out myself. When me and my bf got together I asked why he still had stuff around the house of hers and he said “I just don’t really pay attention” and “Just throw it out” it didn’t really bother me too much I was just curious why he still had stuff of hers if she came to get her stuff originally anyway. I don’t think you should let it bother you too much. And if it does bother you just ask him if you see it laying around if you can just go ahead and throw it out. 9 times outta 10 if their not holding onto a past relationship they won’t care.
They shared 10 years together. There’s gonna be shit that pops up from time to time. 10 years is a long time. I think it’s a little insecurity. Plus men are dumb. He genuinely probably didn’t see or notice them.
My fiance still had his wedding photo when I got with him which I can understand. He ended up throwing it out once it got serious between us. He said it belongs in the past now
I still have a box with pictures and love letters from my first “real” relationship. We don’t have any ties or kids together but I always kept everything to remind myself what real love is and hope to one day show my daughter and tell her that story. It’s a very good reminder to myself when I’m feeling lost in this dating world and it was a relationship that helped mold me into who I am today. You’re not wrong for feeling the way you do, we are only human. Just try to give him a break and make sure to COMMUNICATE when things like that bother you so you two can navigate through it together 
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When I moved I found pics of my ex and threw them out he sounds like hes being honest and you need to chill
Have a conversation about how it makes you feel! Respectfully and calmly of course, approach it with delicacy. Ask him if you can both come up with a solution that he’s comfortable with, whether you spend a day going through the house and ‘purging’ or whether he’s happy for you to get rid of things yourself. This is common for guys, I have experienced it with past relationships too. I had to help my last partner go through his ex’s belongings, and in the end he couldn’t deal with it, it was too traumatic, so I sorted it all and put all rubbish in the bin and her belongings out of sight so he could decide what to do when he was ready. He was very grateful.
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Great out and find someone else u don’t need all that shit
Men are slower to the “what matters” stuff. It bothers you but he probably doesn’t even notice these things still around until you find them.
Does he own the home? If renting or you’re both that serious look into getting a new place and ditch her stuff as you pack
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Men don’t care about all that petty stuff! You’re being super immature.
Hes a man and most men i know cant be asked to go through things and sort things they just leave them hes probably not even aware hes still got some of that stuff. Hes throwing it out when you find it so its not like hes holding on to the stuff on purpose
10 years. That is a lot of time to acquire crap that will drive you nuts but he does not even realize is an issue. In the words of Elsa
What more does he have to do? If it’s the accidentally finding things do the whole clean out if that helps but seems his actions are good.
I would throw them away. But the fact he’s willing to is a great sign. Be confident. She’s a cheating piece of shit I’m sure he wants you
He has definitely shown how much he cares about you. Just stop being so insecure
Everyone has a past. They were together a long time. There will be things in the house somewhere. I think you will end up pushing him away if you keep on this road.
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Boys are oblivious and I honestly think he has no idea any of the stuff is even there, they don’t pay attention that much
Immature, Insecure, and very Selfish.
This was a chapter in HIS life, not yours.
You have ZERO right to expect him to simply forget about the important people in his life because you are insecure??
Stop acting like a self-centered teenager and grow up.
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A magnet… Your jealous of a magnet. Mate he can’t literally erase her from his life there’s always gonna be something that arrises that got stored away or something as small as a magnet. Maybe take some hints from what you found eg love letters, why no write him a love letter? 10 years is a long time together, he’s recently single, if you keep nagging him or snapping at him cus you found something he’s gonna go sorry but he is!
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I’d definitely say insecure. I’ve been in my relationship 12 years. He was married before me and has a son with his ex as well. I still once in awhile will find a family picture or something and it’s seriously not important at all. Don’t let it get to u!!!
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Y’all are being kind of hard on her! If I was dating somebody and he had pictures of himself with another woman on the fridge after we’d been together a year, I’d ask him to put them away. She didn’t specify if they’re now sharing the home but that’s bad juju. I would guess it still hurts him that she was unfaithful after so many years together. She didn’t force him to move on and be with her now so wouldn’t want to see this ex’s face everywhere I turn. If it were me I’d be thankful I came to know him but someone who hurts someone you care about isn’t your favorite person anyway. I’d just trust that the stuff around the house was in error. Guys don’t think of stuff like we do. I would just help him make better memories and move on in life because I’m sure it still stings that he gave someone that many years and she was unfaithful.
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I’ve remarried and I still have a snow global my first husband gave me for our first anniversary that was engraved & a framed picture from us on the day we got married making silly faces and we ended on bad terms. I keep them in the closet but they are there and my now husband knows about them. It’s hard to deal with yes but you have to remember that that person was someone who was a huge part of his life. When you make the choice to marry someone normally it’s with the intention of forever and that always holds some place in their hearts. It’s okay to have memories of it still and hold onto different things. That doesn’t mean he doesn’t love you. But he shouldn’t have to erase her to be with you.
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Same with me and my husband. When we started dating I moved in with him about a year after him and his ex wife separated. I found pictures, clothes, some of her kids stuff (they never had kids together). It bothered me at first but I knew he was over her and wanted to be with me. I just started throwing it away if i found anything …I actually kept a couple Picture frames😂.
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You’re too immature and insecure for someone who was already married and they JUST split. Lol
You will find evidence of her yes get over it or leave. They shared a life together. Yes you’re being insecure.
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Men don’t understand things like this … if he throws them away when you point them out then I wouldn’t be upset ? I feel like sharing custody with dogs would be more upsetting rather then finding old pictures ?!
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Lol I think we all have some stuff saved from our exs. They are just memories and nothing more.
He probably just never thought to go around the house finding every little thing and throw it out. I got jealous over something like this. Looking back, it was stupid. It helped when I finally just got rid of the stuff. He didn’t care, and I didn’t have to keep being annoying every time I found something. If he is giving no other reasons to feel that way, Let it go. Ask if you can either throw stupid stuff that you come across out or ask if you guys can start a box you can throw that stuff in so he can see if there’s anything important before it gets thrown out. Eventually it will all be out of mind, out of sight.
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Okay. Why is everyone being so rude??? She’s not saying she’s the “centre of the universe” or anything. Don’t tell her to grow up. Don’t be assholes. She asked if she’s being insecure or not, not if she’s immature. Anyways, 10 years is a long time, no one can just get rid of any trace of someone like that! Those are memories they might wanna keep. But if he throws them out when you notice them and he’s doing it willingly then he’s with you and for just you! Insecurities freakin’ suck, I get it!
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Men don’t understand the concept of a thorough clean out after a break up. Women will destroy any trace of past relationships. Men are oblivious. Take all that with a grain of salt
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If you find anything that’s hers or pictures, throw it in a box and let him decide what to do with it.
My husband was married before me. He divorced her due to her cheating. He had little things from his past life with her, but I wasn’t insecure about any of it. Old pictures of their lives together, they were his memories. Didn’t bother me at all. The only problem we ever had was he found it hard to trust me due to her actions. We worked it out and we were married 42 years until his death. I gave him the life she never could!
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It’s just… Stuff. My gf is still friends with her ex bf, and her phone is under his name. She pays him for it. She has no feelings towards him.
I’d rhink if he isn’t going to see his ex wife and isn’t being sneaky about anything, you have nothing to worry about.
If you find anything just toss it and move on. You are sounding ridiculous tho
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I’ve been with my current partner for ten years. Both of us were married prior to our relationship and we both still have things from that time. His are in a little box that stays in the closet that he never looks and some of mine are also in a box and I never take them out. We both had lives before we had each other and we both have good memories of those people and places. It doesn’t mean we love each other less or that we are secretly pining for our old loves.
You do sound like you are being insecure but that is something you can work on and asking him to completely erase any sign of her from his life is a little much. If he wants to throw away things that’s fine, its also fine if he wants to keep them but have them put up.
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Let him alone everyone has mementos of breakups that they keep.doesnt mean he doesnt love you
I think it’s your insecurities. He throws them out when you find them. If he wanted them, they would put them away. That tells me he isn’t thinking about them at all. On the other side of that, no one should need to throw away every reminder of their past. It’s a part of them. Unless he’s looking at it daily with a longing sigh, it is just the past. You keep bringing the past to the present when you make a point to mention it.
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men can be dumb. give him a chance. he might genuinely noteven notice that stuff. but he does toss it when it is found
It is not your place to throw out any of it. He shared a life with her for 10 years. Of course he will have things. It is normal. It wouldn’t be normal if he obsessed over it or it was all over the place. But here and there is to be expected. Just because they didn’t work out doesn’t mean he isn’t allowed to have memories of when they were good. But that is the past. Not the present. He chooses to be with you every day when he comes home to you. If he wanted to be with her he would be.
It’s defiantly just insecurity and not something to be concerned about. It’s silly to think of your boyfriend as only starting his life with you. He made memories and lived life with not only his wife but other relationships too. And there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. It’s part of his past and a lifetime of moments that should not be erased just because you came into the picture. I won’t lie, I have pictures and a few gifts/memorabilia from my exes and some of them are even on my Facebook friends. I will forever cherish the fond memories and moments I had with them but it doesn’t take anything away from the love and commitment to my husband. Just as his exes and previous marriage don’t take away from his. He was married before, it didn’t end well but that was still a part of his life and journey so I have no desire to erase it like it didn’t happen. I am sad to see how many women on this thread would be threatened by the simple fact that their man was a human being who liked other people before them. It’s just silly ness. Don’t let it get to you. He’s with you now and now is all that matters.
Men don’t think like we do. He probably didn’t realize he had them
If you are living together he should respect you and make sure to go through all his old shit from his previous wife. Can’t start new with old shit popping up all the time. In saying that men are pretty blasé about ‘stuff’ so maybe do a spring clean with him and work out what needs to stay and what needs to go so that you feel comfortable. This ‘stuff’ bothers you because you love him.
Men are not very observant creatures. He probably doesn’t even realize they are there.
I think he has a 10 year past and you shouldn’t be too hard on him for having momentos from a 10 year relationship still lingering around. Sometimes they are more than just memories of a person. They could be a reminder of what he doesn’t want. Just a thought. But honestly he probably just didn’t even notice anymore. Guys are not as thorough after a breakup. Girls wi burn every picture but guys won’t be that invested in hunting down every image
You’re insecure. Most men don’t care about mushy stuff like that and he doesn’t realize they’re laying around because they’ve always just been there, like furniture. After awhile, you just don’t notice or pay attention. You should only be upset if he’s fighting to KEEP those items. If he’s actively telling you to toss them, then simply do that as you find them and be happy with your man.
You can’t blame him for not fully letting go of a life he once lived before you were even a thought.
Girl I have been divorced for ten years and moved three times since and I STILL find stuff from when I was married to my exhusband
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I just want to say you are not insecure. That shit about having save the date magnet on the refrigerator would last about a month. My question is how close are you? If you have been seeing him for a year it would piss me off to see stuff like that and letters laying around. If you have been seeing him for a year you are thinking about moving forward. You can’t move forward until he lets go of the past. I know he had 10 years with her but she also cheated on him. Why would he keep that stuff out in the open? This right here is why when my daughter was dating she was picky about it. Her number one rule was nobody with baggage.
Honestly he’s a man he probably hasn’t even paid any attention that is still laying around the house, I bet if you got rid of it without even asking to he would never notice