Throw the whole man away and start over!
Since when is basic adult survival skills A PART OF BEING A WOMAN?! You’re not his maid. He can dust his own damn deer heads. You’re a stay at home mom to care for the kids and prevent paying for childcare. Not so you can be the maid. I’m sorry but no.
mm. no. absolutely not. ask him why he can’t get off his ass and do it himself— are his legs broken? if they’re not already, break them.
Ladies I’ve been saying this for years now.
Get out there and get back to work.
If you are a stay home mom and complain about your husband seeing you as the maid, go back to work.
If being trapped in the house makes you lose your mind, go back to work.
If you feel like your life has been reduced to take care of the kids and clean all day, go back to work.
Staying home moms is for rich people, whose husbands are making a lot of money and they have nannies and housekeepers.
You can also have a housekeeper if you work and pay for it.
Tell your husband that you’re tired of his bullshit and that you are going back to work. That you will hire a housekeeper and the house will be perfectly clean, the way he likes it.
But if you’re broke, unemployed, no personal income, and on top of that your husband is a jerk who expects you to clean 24/7 GO BACK TO WORK. No wonder why mental health is a big problem nowadays. These environments are the trigger for depression and anxiety.
Call in merry maid…do what makes you feel better
I feel this way about myself alot. You explained me to a T. And what your husband needs to understand is it takes a village. Sometimes when I feel like that my mans mom, or one of my friends or even my sons gf comes and takes the kids, or just comes amd cleans or straightens up just so I get out of my depression and not feel overwhelmed. Then after that I’m able to proceed and not feel like its all on me and qa weight is lifted. I would try to find your village. And that was a low blow about being a woman
Listen. My ex was like this. I was so tired of it I got a job to try and show that both need to take part in cleaning a house. It didn’t work. My man now is totally different. He understands I watch the kids all day, and instead of doing me for what I didn’t do he tells me how proud of the things I did clean. He listens to me talk about struggling to keep the house clean with the kids, and on weekends he helps me deep clean and then takes us out to do something fun and out of the house. I looked at him yesterday and told him I needed a break, that my mental health was on the line. He took the kids to bed, let me take a bath, and once I fell asleep he stayed up all night to deep clean so I had nothing to worry about this morning. Being a SAHM is HARD and our mental health is a HUGE thing to keep control on to keep or homes functioning. TALK to him. Express your feelings and that a little help would be nice. Always tell him you’re thankful for him keeping your family financially sound, but you need help.
Tell him having sex with a misogynist grosses you out.
You should see my house! Four kids. 10,5,2.5 and 2 months. I hardly have time to shit or shower by myself. My fiancé knows damn well I don’t have the time to deep clean this house. We’ve even talked about hiring a cleaning lady. The most I do is sweep. Vacuum. Pick up toys here and there. Dishes. Laundry. Dinner. And dust once a month. My mil deep cleans for us once every couple of months. But wtf is the point when my kids go right behind and fuck up the house again. Until they’re all in school full time. My house will continue to look like a pig sty
Tell him to f off!!!
Better step up your game
lol I’d leave. Especially if he makes comments like that often. He’s clearly degrading you, and passive aggressively saying he doesn’t think you do enough. Be careful. He sounds a mentally abusive person to me.
I say make his ass a single dad and let him see how hard it is. Tell
Him you want a MAN and that means someone
Who doesn’t disrespects the mother of his kids
Oh and to Answer his question, I would say that as a woman, HE grosses you out…
I’d make a believer out of him. Omg. He would rue the day. You’re not being too sensitive. If anything- you’re being too dam nice.
The roles are reversed in my house. I’m the one working, he’s a SAHD. He cleans very little. Most of the chores are left to our teenage sons. It aggravates me that I have to do the deep cleaning when I’m off on the weekends. But, if I don’t do it, it doesn’t get done. If the roles were reversed, he would expect me to do all the cleaning while he was at work. I don’t see that a full time working husband wanting to come home to a clean house is too much to ask.
I would throw a dirty dishrag at him and tell him to "fudging” clean it himself. How disrespectful!
I feel your pain. It’s weird that a value of a woman is how well she can cook or clean. Eventually you won’t even want to do it anymore. You will feel disgusted to do it and it becomes such a belittling task.
Maybe get help for few hours…
Then when it is clean it is easier to keep up…
For instance do wash everyday…
Easier to spend 10 minutes wash, dry, putting away than hours .
Take 2 minutes per day to wipe fridge …
Wipe bathroom daily…5-10 minutes…
Run vacuum every couple days…
When you break it down and have set time and dates for things… example I always do bedding on weekends…much easier to do…
Take $60… get some help in
And please get some help for your depression…
And tell your man…he definitely needs to read a calendar…this is not 1950…
When I make a meal I expect a thank-you…and if he forgets I go… thank-you dear for dinner…then he will say thank-you to me…
I do things out of love
Not because my job because I’m female
I’d be telling him to swivel.
For cleaning, I follow The Organised Mum Method. It has helped me and the husband a lot
Man here, I think I speak for my whole gender when I say, we don’t like to clean because we have a bad habit of doing it wrong. We hate the fact that we get belittled for not properly folding a towel; we are kinda like cats, if it fits, it sits. We’re not lazy but having a shellfish crap attitude will give a man no reason whatsoever to play along, is easier for us to just walk away and maintain our peace, personally I’m lost when it comes to pleasing a women, y’all aaaaaalways got something to complain about…🤷
Keeping your feelings to yourself will get you nowhere or it will cause you to blow up or fall apart. You need to tell him how that made you feel. If you’re concerned about how You might react or come off when you’re speaking with him, consider writing him a letter. Give him a chance to apologize and talk about it. If he doesn’t, then you need to do some self reflection. If you are seeing or talking to a therapist, I think it would be a good idea. So many therapists are doing telehealth visits still so you wouldn’t even have to leave your house to talk with them.
- It’s wrong, disrespectful and disgusting that he thinks that it’s only a woman’s job to clean or that we are made to clean. 2. You need help for your depression. 3. You’re a stay at home mom and he is at work so ultimately you have to do the cleaning. Not all the time. But it’s what you have to do. But I would suggest that you get a domestic worker, house help, a housekeeper.
When somebody in the family has depression it takes a village to surround that person with help and love. Sometimes all you need is 1 person. But it makes a difference. Please get the mental help you need so you can be the best you for your kids.
The way he said it is shitty. But My husband has said similar things. I’m a terrible cleaner. I have had clutter around the house and laundry piles everywhere. I am honestly not a good homemaker… but I’m a great, devoted and attentive mother. So we finally got a housekeeper and we are so happy. It’s expensive, but totally worth it for us. Maybe discuss that as an option with him? Or him taking the kids for a few hours a week so you can clean?(that’s what we did on occasion prior to the housekeeper, and it was my most efficient cleaning time. He’d take them to the playground and out for ice cream or something and I’d have uninterrupted time to tidy up).
If you have not already you may need to go talk to your doctor about getting help for the depression. That may be counseling, medication, whatever you need to get yourself back to normal. Talk to your husband and help him to understand depression and how it affects you. Maybe once he understands the illness he won’t be so rude.
I wouldn’t be dusting his man cave. Leave a little basket of what he needs. He can get the hint.
As for the fridge. Line your shelves with press and seal and make it a point to replace them weekly.
Being a full time mom with 2 littles IS a 24 hour job on its own. He had no wright to make a comment like that to you. I hope you are getting help for the depression, it won’t get better on its own and your kids need a healthy mom. If it’s in your husband’s budget ask him to hire someone to come deep clean once in awhile. At least until your depression is under control.
He is rude. He could have asked you nicely if you can clean a few things that he thinks are necessary. My husband just said hey if you can organize the cupboard I’ll organize all the papers that you have been complaining about and I said deal lol.
I wouldve come back with the fact that cleaning is not only a womans job and then said I will not dust around nasty deer heads you prefer to have hanging so you can either get rid of them or stop bitching. I feel you about the depression though. Mine has been bad and my house is a wreck right now.
Until your husband has done some of your duties as a wife, his opinion is just that. I have been super studying, working full-time, and doing night classes. I take my daughter with me to work and I do little at the house. After years of me doing it all, my husband has to pickup the slack. It is nice to hear someone else complain about rags not making it into the basket. Ha ha. If he has an issue with it, just let him know he is capable. “I believe in you.”
He must think all cleaning and cooking etc is “womans work”. Tell him you know you have been lax but it would be nice if he could help out too. People who complain about something not being done right should get out there and show you how its done, right? Yeah, he sounds a little unappreciative and mean. My advice would be just to let it go for now and maybe hire some help if you can afford it. Maybe somebody who you can pay a few hours a week to help deep clean and make everyone happy. But i hope he doesn’t say things like this all the time! If he isn’t helping out a little, hes part of the problem and maybe even your depression lately?
You have a rude husband and he is probably not going to get any better. You will spend the rest of your life jumping through hoops to try and please him.
Get a cleaner in give him the bill
I would have told there is nothing stopping you from cleaning if you don’t like how I do it.
I’ve had a similar discussion with my partner. I’m a sahm, I suffer with manic depression, so somedays I think that can wait until tomorrow. I also notice that while I scrub and clean 1 room the last room gets trashed by the children so it never looks like I do much at all even after a full day ignoring my children to clean. There comes a point where I think f*** it I’m doing this with my children instead cleaning can wait till tomorrow. My partner has made comments like I have all day so I should have time to clean the house. My answer is simple, if you don’t like it I’ll get a job and you stay at home. He comments how his job is so much harder, and physically it is but mentally it’s not, being a mother is a 24/7 job you don’t get a break they wake at 2am crying you have to go, you can’t ask your partner to he gets annoyed because he has to be up for work in 3 hours. I also shown him how hard it was by when he had time off of work for holidays I refused to do anything and said its my holiday too. The state of the house was worse than ever.
Now he’s just grateful at what does get done. And he helps more on his days off.
Sometimes you just need to show them how hard it can be. We have 3 children all the time, and my partners 4 the half of the time too.
I doubt he said it like that, but putting that spin on it will definately get you some backing by strangers on FB who will tell you what a sexist pig comment that is… as a SAHM your “job” or contribution to your family, your partnership duties literally include taking care of and keeping up with the house and all those in it. I am sure if he made minimum wage you wouldn’t be able to be a SAHM, and you would/could/might say things like " as a man I expect you to provide better for your children". Being the sole bread winner is a HUGE responsibility and has immense stress on a person, you are being too sensitive, what if driving to work made him vomit? Would you expect him to do it any way? Why don’t you get a job and hire someone to do the housework that makes you so ill? There are so many solutions to your privileged problem, none of which include whining about it on social media. This is what privilege looks like, a woman who gets ill by cleaning, and has a husband who makes a snide remark about it and your whole life is wrecked and need the reassurance of strangers that you’re right and he’s wrong, allowing you to be lazy and get out of your responsibility to your family. So let me guess, your husband should be the sole financial provider and come home and clean because you are too dignified as a woman and it makes you ill to clean the messes the children you created make and the husband you chose choice in decor make? Got it. I can think of so many struggles women across the globe face and this “problem” doesn’t even make it on the chart. Sounds to me like you complain a lot and are disgusted and get ill at a lot of things, if the comment he made to you is accurate, there is more to this than just the house cleaning, hence the comment.
What a comment . Did not know it was mandatory to a women
Is your depression being treated? Try to do one thing in the house each day to improve things. Ask him to help you. (Surely he can clean the deer heads!). But I don’t think he should have to do a major clean after work. Focus on essential things for hygiene, (keeping the fridge clean is one). Just take it in little steps. If you wipe down as you go you won’t have food dried on, for example. Would you feel better if you worked part time, to get out, and got someone to do some of the cleaning? Don’t give up, good luck.
Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. Am I being sensitive about my husbands comment toward the cleanliness of our house?
Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. Am I being sensitive about my husbands comment toward the cleanliness of our house?
Your feelings are valid and to be quite honest even if you are a stay at home mom you do alot, he can come home from work and clean and cook too, he can also take care of the kids when he is home. Women being expected to clean and cook and take care of everything is disgusting. Everytime you go grocery shopping get cash back, and pay yourself, its not fair for you to be financially trapped under him when you are at home taking care of the kids
Yup. I like to be wined and dined. Open the door for me. Buy me flower and gifts. Foreplay, pedicure and manicures. I love all that. Maybe if you could be more of a man and treat me like a woman I’d be more inclined to clean like one too.
These men who go to work and their wives stay at home and do it all, just don’t get it. They need to spend a few weeks at home with the kids alone while mom is gone all day. I guarantee they change their tunes. They won’t be able to handle the kids that long let alone clean, cook and all the other mom stuff.
Sounds like he has no clue how hard being a sahm is. I would be bitter too.
Personally that would be a relationship ender for me. If you think im not doing it good enough have fun finding someone to do it better. So my advice is leave if someone is gonna make you feel bad about yourself.
But if leaving is too drastic i would wait till your both calmer and explain how hurtful his words are. Explain that you feel he is coming at your harshly and unjustly. Maybe he doesnt understand how hard it can be to run a home and parent at the same time. Its best to assume ignorance and not malice.
Has he ever been a stay at home dad? He might not haveperspective on how hard you work.
There’s something else that’s stressing him out. You are just an easy target for him. After the kids go to bed ask him how work is going. And tell him what he said hurt you. Try to keep your emotions in check, but have the conversation.
Wonder if he ever thought to do it himself. Women weren’t put on this earth to be their slaves. We all go through rough patches and to be fair just because you are a stay at home Mum, that in itself is a full time job and you are only human.
I hate cleaning myself. My husband works and I stay home. Unfortunately, I’m disabled and am allergic to most cleaners so my husband does the deep cleaning. To make both our jobs easier, we both clean up messes as they happen. This makes deep cleaning less work. I know it’s hard with depression. Not being able to leave the house much gives me a lot of depression along with feeling sick most days. Give yourself credit for doing what you are able to do. Tell your husband if he doesn’t like it, there’s nothing stopping him from doing it. There’s no reason why he can’t help with the deep cleaning, he lives there too.
I’m married to one of the most wonderful and supportive men ever! He would’ve asked me if there was anything he could do to help me. Cleaning IS NOT part of being a woman! Men can clean just as well as women! If you’re having problems he should be supportive and pick up the slack. This is more of a reflection on him as a man than you as a woman!
My husband got mad at me once when his work clothes weren’t clean when he needed them and I didn’t touch his clothes for two years after
Yeah, everyone has to do their part. I think you just make excuses for things you don’t like😢. The excuses are pretty lame, like teenager excuses. You need to try harder - he’s getting up every day and making an effort to provide for you. Nobody loves all the things that come with being an adult, but you gotta grow up sometime.
Just because you are a stay at home doesn’t mean you are a freaking maid!! Ugh this infuriates me. My husband has made fun sometimes but never made me feel like shit about myself. I’m assuming he knows about your depression, he should have compassion, help you to feel better. I worked from home for 2.5 years running daycare and it isn’t as easy being home with kids and cleaning. It isn’t that simple. If he is so upset with the upkeep why doesn’t he help? It isn’t just a womens job. Smh. My husband does the dishes/dishwasher and vacuums least a few times a week.
I’ve been a stay at home mom and honestly, didn’t find it difficult to balance taking care of the kids and daily chores along with making meals. As a stay at home mom, that was my “job”. The contribution to our family. When the kids were little and napped I got most of my cleaning done. What else was there to do but watch TV. Kids don’t take up our time all day long. While they’re watching TV or playing with toys, those are prime times to get things done. I’ve never done laundry everyday … maybe every other day. Idk I feel there is plenty of time in the day to do all these things. Most people don’t dust everyday. Or clean the frig out everyday. Once a week. So break it up through out the week . I’ve also been a full time mom with a full time job. To me, that’s far more difficult to balance than being a stay at home mom. Your feelings are valid, but his are as well. What if he started taking time off work and didn’t get paid? Not enough money to pay all the bills? Would that not upset you? Kind of the same you’re doing to him.
I’m sure if he was stuck at home with two kids as long as you have, cleaning wouldn’t come as easy as he may think.
you’re not being too sensitive , he sounds kinda like a jerk.
splash some water on your face and turn some music on and start with one room at a time, you got this!
If you do a good deep clean, you may feel better
Cleaning is the way I release my stress and relax my nerves. It also helps with my depression.
I don’t think any man understands what being a stay at home mom is like. I’m a single working mom but you couldn’t pay me enough to be a SAHM. I would lose my sanity. It’s not like you have a lot of free time on your hands, you really don’t. Small children need your attention CONSTANTLY and sometimes you forget to take care of yourself let alone clean the house that he is also living in. I would have gave him a death stare.
Uhmm how is cleaning about being a woman? Men can clean and have two hands as well. They’ve just been taught since birth that they don’t have to. That all needs to change. I hope that the current moms and dads bring their sons up to think differently. And also, I’d leave him one day with the kids and go out shopping, ect. (assuming you don’t do this often) and make sure you’re gone a long time. He won’t be saying any of that again. Sometimes they need a reality check. Taking care of kids all day is harder than any job anyone will ever do.
No,you are not being too sensitive. That was y really dicky thing to say.
I’m also a SAHM and if my husband ever said anything to me like that, I’d literally go on strike and do absolutely nothing.
I can guarantee if you felt appreciated you would have the motivation to do so much more around the house. Someone talking to me like that would make me feel depressed. I’m sure this isn’t the only time he’s been rude like this. Some of these men need a wake up call.
“I felt really hurt by that comment you made about me cleaning. I’ve been thinking about it a lot. I want you to know I’m trying and that I’ve also been depressed and exhausted lately. I’d appreciate constructive comments or your help with cleaning in the future”
How is cleaning part of being a woman?! I would be pissed about him pointing it out and the way he said it! He can clean too! Just because he works full time doesn’t mean he can’t contribute to the house. Put him in your shoes for 1 day and I bet he’ll change his tune!
Throw the whole man out. It would be one thing for him to communicate noticing your cleaning habits have become more laxed, but that insulting, belittling delivery is way out of line
Nope, nope, nope. You both love in that house and it is not YOUR duty to clean anything! The duties should be shared. A caring partner would not hesitate to help you out, especially if you have a hard time doing something! Him working is not an excuse!
I work 2 full time jobs and have for almost 10 years. My husband works 1 full time job. My house isn’t always clean. We have 2 children. But what I found out is if there is love in the house everything else will work itself out. My advice would be get a job if you can afford to because child care is expensive and Work on your depression because it could leave those children alone with their father if you don’t fix yourself. The job will help with your self esteem and probably your depression. Staying at home with children is exhausting in itself. I found out that I work less at my job than at home. this of course is just another opinion and option. And like a previous person said his issue is deeper then the house and it’s cleanliness. A deeper conversation is needed.
After working all day, would YOU want to come to a dirty home? I would say pay someone to do a deep cleaning and then keep up with it as much as possible.
No, if you’re struggling with depression, taking care of the kids all day, and still doing all the cleaning, you beautiful lady are a friggin rock star! You deserve a thank you from your husband not criticism
you’re a stay at home mom, not a stay at home maid. you both live there.
Sounds to me. And I may be wrong, it was a sex jab. Mine would make comments about things like cleaning but in reality he was mad about lack of sex. I was tired, depressed and had self esteem issues. 5 kids, and I was just exhausted. I hope I’m wrong but it may not be about house keeping at all.
Um, no. Everyone on here defending him in any sort of way is wrong. Being a stay at home mom is more than a full time job. It’s a 24:7 job. You have a job and he has one, housework should be 50/50 period.
No that was definitely not okay for him to say to you. He was being intentionally demeaning.
My house is a mess ,my kids a reck ,and I cry all the time. My husband works full time. If he don’t like how the house looks let him clean it. I lost my daughter to a over dose almost two years ago and I raise her kids. I’m always depressed. It’s hard being a stay at home mom and keeping your shit together. When I was younger I did it all . Now not so much. Husband’s just don’t get it.
I’m a sahm and work from home mom. My husband had to stay with our two boys (2&1 yr old) by himself while I went to my 13hr tattoo session. When I got home he was clearly exhausted and asked me how I ever got anything done bc he barely had time to pee granted he never makes comments on the house or anything before bc he’s the biggest slob in the house but still it was nice for him to comprehend what I deal with daily. Make him stay with the kids all day and see how much he gets done
I would be pissed to!
If he knows you haven’t been able to do those things/ it makes you sick doing them. Then he can bloody well do it!
If your keeping on top of washing, dishes, normal everyday cleaning and keeping all of you alive then you are doing damn well!!
You need to sit down and tell him that it hurt you and you won’t take his shit like that again!
don’t come to my house. We live in clean clutter and dusting let’s just say we’re inhaling all the skin particles in house
And no he doesn’t get to be an ass hat but we all have our moments. I would honestly just have an open conversation with him. To me communication is key in any relationship (intimate or just friends). I’m sorry you are having a rough time. Maybe if you have a friend nearby you might be able to reach out. I know it can be hard and seem degrading but a good friend will clean the fridge while you mop the floors
Girl… @$;! That dude… a real MAN would should not speak to his wife that way. Hire a housekeeper.
You should have said, “Well maybe if you help it won’t be so bad.”
Sorry but thats really insensitive. I tore my rotator cuff and didn’t work for one year and became very depressed. I went from my bed to the couch and watched Netflix all damn day and didn’t clean a thing even though I was home all day and all night. My SO never once said a peep. (I also gained 25 pounds) Instead he asked how I usually do it, so he can. So I felt bad and got up to help him and he insisted I sit and just dictate how it’s done so he can do it. And he did. Even now, I’m back to work on light duty, and still can’t 100% do my house cleaning, he still asks how he can help and supports me through it. I’m not a therapist but I dont think there’s there’s a team there. Something else is brewing with him. You need to talk.
I’m alittle old fashioned… my husband and I both work construction… we also farm and have livestock… horses …chickens… he works longer hours than me so I get up extra early to get my chores done… go to work… get my evening chores done… then take care of the yard and housework… we usually eat out then home to shower and sleep and do it all over again the next day… I also care for my handicapped daughter… I find a lot of excuses going on in this post. If it’s depression and you’re sure it is then seek help from a doctor and make your life as pleasant as u can
You have every right to be upset…you work a full time job as well! I’ve been a stay at home mom…it was the hardest job I have ever had, going to work was getting rest!! That is HIS job to clean what you havent!! Do NOT let him make you think you have not been up on your job, taking care of HIS babies is your full time job!!!
“If you see something that needs doing, don’t tell me about it, do it yourself. I’m not your mama. I’m not the only one that lives here so pitch in buddy.”
Stand up for yourself, don’t let anyone talk down to you like that, you’re a person not trash.
“I’ll deep clean the house when you learn how to deep clean this pu$$y.”
Both of the above quotes I’ve said to my husband and he no longer says anything.
My partner would never say something like that… I’ve been this way before while he was working but with 4 kids … The longer he worked the better I got then I medicated and I got better for a little bit… during that time he would make lil jokes that I took as a stab but never anything how your man spoke, sorry your going through this boo, it does get better, and it will happen faster with a more supportive man … and not supportive like spending more time at home helping maybe just helping mentally or emotionally better
He lives in the house too. He wants it dusted so bad he can do it himself. Lmao. Why can’t he clean the fridge? Does he never store food there?
I think why the woman?? Clean & cook?? It’s not right even if you are a SAHM…good grief the other 1/2 probably leaves the JOB after 40 hrs or so. Dont have housekeeper or cook tattooed on a woman. Yet…
Dealing with depression AND taking care of your kids? You are a rock star in my book. There were days that’s all i managed to do. All i can say is:
- It won’t always be like this; please seek the help of a professional therapist if it doesn’t get better soon.
- Your husband is an ass; please seek the help of a professional cleaning service to come in to do some deep cleaning for you.
Yes that was rude, I would be upset too. I would have liked to been told nicely and respectful if there’s a problem. There’s no need to be an ass to address the situation He could have made his point without being mean to her
I fully understand. I’m the same way. Doing dishes makes me wanna puke and when I’m depressed and overwhelmed, I have no motivation whatsoever. I would understand if he asked you to do more around the house or maybe asked you if something was wrong that you stopped cleaning as thoroughly as before, but that whole "boy catch buffalo, girl clean toilet bowl, ugga bugga… " cave man attitude was just rude.
I usually work, but I just had a baby 3 weeks ago so I’m on maternity, so rn I’m a stay at home mom with the baby and my 2 year old son. I’m constantly cleaning up after my son and taking care of the baby and sometimes I break down and cry because being a stay at home mom is definitely hard. I praise the women who do this on a daily basis. My husband works full time and he’s finishing school to get his degree. Even though he has a lot on his plate, he helps me with the boys and even offers to watch them while I take a nap. He helps cook too. And he is 22. So I definitely would be offended by your husband saying that. Because even younger guys are more respectful and understanding out there.
My husband does nothing when he’s at home. He won’t even pick up after himself. Drives me crazy. We separated a few years ago and he said “my house is always clean. It’s your housekeeping skills that need to get better” it still upsets me to this day. It is what it is.
Bump the crap. My daughter is a stay at home mom to two teenagers and she never gets a break. I work and support the family and to me, my job is way easier than hers!
It is literally easier to deploy to Afghanistan than stay at home with 2 small kids, keep your sanity, develop those kids and keep a clean house. Trust me…i have done both…this makes me so mad
Honestly being a stay at home mom would be super hard with depression! I struggle with depression and I understand how difficult just showering alone is. I know myself well enough to know if I was a SAHM I would struggle to keep everything together just because getting motivated can be so hard!! And being at home alot and just not getting adult/social interaction can make it so much harder to get out of a funk. I’m so sorry hun! Just know you aren’t alone and your husband was completely in the wrong for saying that!
I love that, "is there anything about being a women that doesn’t gross you out? Coming from a freaking male that’s a bit rich. You are not defined by your husband’s outdated interpretation of a womens role in our society. I’d be pissed and hurt also.
My husband works full time and I work evenings I’m going down to part time next week. But he has always and still cooks, does dishes, changed the kids diapers when they were little. He does laundry, takes out the trash. So yes he should help you out. You’re a team.
Being a SAHM IS a full time job in itself. Child care, laundry, cooking, shopping, cleaning. I believe a spouse should share in work after he gets home. Children are a 24 hr. job
He is worried about lil him
So do yourself the favor he
just gave you …
If he won’t stay when it really gets rough and hire help and/or help you.
Leave or let him go.
You being disabled is never an excuse for ANYONE to mistreat you ever
Lol that comes from every husband of a stay at home mom!
Perhaps the question isn’t that but why you have such adverse feelings/reactions to cleaning ? Perhaps some cognitive behavioural therapy is an option to explore and hubby needs to support your emotional reaction to this
And also, the gross jobs are for my husband🤷♀️ he doesn’t complain and he’s never once said anything like that to me. Men don’t act like that
Hmmm being a mom at home isn’t a piece of cake, and after all the house cleaning and taking care of the kids and you still have to take care if him to …know what I mean …jeez if this doesn’t hit home, have that conversation ,what he said wasn’t right regardless c’mon WTF