Am I crazy? Or is that almost child abuse?

If your 4 year old is struggling to sleep in their own bed, what do you do to break that?? How do you go about getting them to sleep in their own bed?? Any advice is appreciated.
Also, do you all think it’s OK to lock a 4 year old in their bedroom at night so they can’t get out??
How about taking away all their clothes so they are too cold to get back out of the bed???
I have had a horrible argument with someone who thinks these things are ok. And when discussed with a few other people, they ALSO seemed to think those things were OK.
Am I crazy??? Or is that almost child abuse???
Please let me know, thank you


Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. Am I crazy? Or is that almost abusive?

I could never do that to my kid it’s cruel


Neither of those things are okay. Definitely abuse.


That’s neglectful tendencies. It is child abuse. I would never be that cruel to my child, or any child.


Not “almost” abuse. It is abuse :disappointed:

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I think it just takes lots of patience.

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WTF!? Neither if these are ok, period. Call CPS.


If you have to ask strangers on the internet whether something is abuse or not…umm…

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What the heck! That’s so cruel! You got some serious issues if you think that at all is OK.

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As a mother of a four year old, my heart breaks thinking that a baby my sons age is being abused like this. I legit want to cry


Deff abuse.

  1. Honestly the trauma from having their clothes taken away is terrifying to think about. This is why food, shelter and CLOTHING are among the most BASIC expectations of a parent.

  2. locking a child in their room is a huuuuuge hazard, imagine an emergency situation where seconds could mean life/death (fire, natural disaster, ect.) and you’re fumbling around to unlock your kids door :triumph:

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The child needs comfort, some children take a little longer to grow into that routine. The person locking the child in the room so they can get out at night needs help. Child’s comfort comes 1st in every situation the child needs to know that, that isnt right.

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It just makes me think… like if these things are okay… what else do they think is okay that they aren’t sharing?:flushed:


That is abuse you just have to redirect the child to bed and be consistent its alot of work but it’ll happen after routine always offer cuddles or something and then after like 5 mins explain it’s time for bed again and sit with them in their room for a bit

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It’s abuse and also if u live in Pennsylvania It’s illegal to use locks on children’s doors do to fire safety reasons

Lay with them in their bed until they fall asleep, if they wake up and come to you just go lay with them again then sneak away…eventually they will get used to it, all those other suggestions that you mentioned won’t help and are detrimental to their mental well being…


Definitely child abuse

My son is 6 and still gets scared to sleep alone in his room, so honestly I let him sleep in the living room. There’s been times where I have made him sleep in his own room with reinsurance that there’s nothing or anyone going to get him. I usually can crack jokes to make him laugh before bed so he doesn’t think about having nightmares but only happy thoughts and dreams.

Definitely abuse though.


That is so cruel and dangerous!! What if there was a house fire during the night & that poor child couldn’t get out of there bedroom to safety because there parents have locked them in :pleading_face:

Umm what? I’m confused as to why someone would think this is ok. I’m all for cry it out but. To literally prison a child that’s wrong. What if they need to go to the bathroom? Redirect them to their room when they get up. Get a night light and maybe some white noise. But lock them up no. And have them freeze wth

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Absolutely child abuse!!! No questions asked. I have 2 younger kids and would never ever ever think about doing that!!!

that is abuse. that is traumatic for any age as a child. they will sleep in their own bed when they dont feel forced and neglected when being locked in a room or made uncomfortable to the point you would rather them be cold so they don’t leave their bedroom to seek comfort in what is supposed to their safe place. again that is abuse.

-im shocked someone would openly communicate about doing such things just to force their child to sleep in their own bed.


Being a mom, I learned to be the most patient. You need a lot of patience.

Hell no. Not okay at all. Those poor kids. :broken_heart:

Definitely abuse. My 4yr old comes into my bed almost every morning. Sometimes he makes it til 4 or sometimes 1:00. I’m too tired to take him back to his bed and he does it because he’s rolled around and uncovered himself and he’s super cold. I would never just pick him up and put him back in his bed. I always welcome him and warm him up. He will sleep with me the rest of the night. No way would I ever lock him in there and him wake up cold or scared. :sob::sob:


Definitely abuse. Report this. Save those babies the fear and anxiety.


Absolutely no to locking anyone in a bedroom

I don’t think that is ok. When my kids wouldn’t stay in bed, I just lay down with them until they fall asleep. Sometimes it’s 10 min up to an hour or so

I don’t think that’s ok at all my 12 year old daughter still sleeps with me it doesn’t phase me , it isn’t doing anything wrong being in my bed . Do not lock them in there room that will cause some major Problems for them in there future being scared , taking there clothes off ? Omg whoever your getting advice from stop … they need mental help ! And that is child abuse ! Your child needs something if they need to be close to you recognize that and find out what the issue is .

Horrible parenting never lock your kids in the bedroom

My 4 year old is never locked anywhere by herself. I bought her a special flashlight specifically to fight her monsters at bedtime. Works like a charm but I make sure she burns off energy all day with healthy meals so then she can sleep better. This is seriously a fucked up question.

It’s definitely child abuse,what if the house caught on fire,and you can’t to them,that’s child endangerment

Call Child Protection Services. You can remain anonymous.


That poor child!!! :broken_heart:

Definitely not ok. It’s actually against family & children services and god forbid if there was ever a fire, you have no idea where and how it would happen. You likely wouldn’t be able to get to them.

Someone took your clothes and locked you in a room hmm…what would that be called. This shouldn’t even need to be asked :roll_eyes: if you don’t know then maybe you don’t need a child.

Might want to add if anyone you’re with that is doing this to a child they need to go. It will only get worse. That is major warning signs of serious abuse coming.


Definitely NOT acceptable!!! Yes, abuse and good for you calling it out. What is really wrong with people who think that’s okay?! Smh.
Try getting the child on a good and calming bed time routine. An hour before bed should start the wind down process. No TV. Bath, story, quiet calm music, sleep meditation, snuggles so they feel safe and comfortable going to bed and staying there. Favorite blankets or stuffed animals with them and if needed, lay there with them until they fall asleep. It just takes A LOT of patience and repetition, trial and error to find out what their needs are. Best wishes! You got this!!


Horrible! Child abuse! No one would do my child like that with my knowledge.

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This is definitely NOT okay!! Our 6 year old still wanders to our bed every night. That is abuse and tormenting to the poor baby!! Try rewarding. Like if you stay in your bed for at least 4 hours you can get a new toy then bump it up to 5/6 hrs etc. offer something else the child likes, make them earn the reward.


My children are 8 & 6 AND STILL SLEEP in the bed with ME!! Why? Because I am their mother, their father and I are their SAFE PLACE.


Locking a child in a bedroom??? Yea NO! What if there was a fire! Huge huge huge child neglect! Taking clothes away so they get so cold?? Again also Neglect! I have a 4 year old son, and never not once have I ever ever thought about any of these! And there’s times he fights to go to sleep (and he’s so tired after school) I’ll lay with him until he falls asleep or I’ll let him sleep on the couch, or with us. Or what ever as long as he’s safe, warm and sleeping honestly thats what matters


It’s absolutely cruel. I honestly don’t get why people stress so much about letting their toddlers sleep in their beds. We’re the only mammals who don’t sleep with our young. It’s natural. Why don’t you sleep with your child in their room to get them used to sleeping in there

Definitely abuse.
That happened to me when I was young & when my parents were married. (Divorced over 20+ years ago) and still till this day (I’m 27) I’m terrified of the dark.


Give me the baby :pensive: lord yes that’s abuse

Yes they are crazy!! This is horrible

Omg that is terrible parenting. Absolutely not ok

Please be asking people with children and who actually love their children for advise…some people just give birth but can’t be mothers(there’s a difference)…

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You’re not crazy! This is abuse! Defend that baby!

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The crying it out of the child is safe whatever some some kids need that but in case of an emergency you never keep those doors shut at night. I will sleep on the couch if she’s crying it out just encase as that’s right infront is her room and some times I pass out before I can open the door as I give her 20-30 min and then open it and go to my bedroom. And I don’t let my child always cry it out but some nights yeah it goes down lol :joy:

The clothing thing is horrible that’s seriously disgusting and sickening.

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I put a loud bell on my kids door handle , his bedroom was literally next to mine and I’m a super light sleeper so I was able to hear if he woke up. But honestly he slept in the same room with me until he was 4-5 and at 6 started staying in his own room (with the bell ) :joy:

This is honestly heart breaking. If it’s not you doing this to your child but someone who helps take care of them get rid of them now. Whoever does this doesn’t deserve to be a parent

Get a toddler sleep training clock, when it’s red you have to stay in bed, when it’s green, you can get up. They’re amazing and also work as a nightlight!

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That’s straight up abuse. Cause that’s what happen to me when I was 4 years old. They had a lock on my door so I couldn’t get out at night. I was traumatized until I was 12 years old I wet the bed until I was 12.

Teaching a child to sleep on their own is fine until you force it👎

And honestly if I was an admin of this page I’d be reporting this nonsense to CPS.


Wow that is not on!!!
My almost 3 year old and 8 year old both sleep with me. Why? Because I like the cuddles too :joy:

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Sounds like that person doesn’t need a child and needs to get help because no that is definitely not ok


Feels like to me the child needs comfort and someone to physically be there beside them to fall asleep. This parent isn’t patient loving and nurturing. A night light :sparkles: does winders and teddy :heart::heart:

All of this is NOT okay.
They are 4 for God sakes!!

Super wrong. Please report asap

Its deff a child abuse….i let my son sleep with us,hes only child for this few years,so y not? Who says poor baby must sleep alone :disappointed: and if he doesn’t want to sleep i just switch off all lights n cuddle with him till he does :smiling_face_with_three_hearts:

No that is not okay :confused:

Is this a joke
Who asks if its ok to lock a child in a bedroom
I would never take away a childs clothes all of what is said is straight ul abuse

I’ve seen kids get taken away and adopted out for these things by human services. A childs door should NEVER lock from the outside and you’re REQUIRED to clothe them. Would you starve a kid? Because those punishments feel one step away from complete neglect. Try a bed on the floor next to mom and dad if its a huge issue, however all of my kids coslept until 5/6. I promise sleeping together is better than traumatizing the child. :grimacing::woman_facepalming:t2:

Locking a door to keep a child in the room is actually the SAFEST thing you can do in case of a fire. That way you know exactly where the child is. My Dr told me to because my daughter would wake up and wander around the house. If you lock the door you need to have a baby monitor in the room with the child so you are aware if the child wakes up. Then go to them to help them get back to sleep.Taking the clothes away is most definitely child abuse.


That’s literally child abuse

Your not crazy. This is so sad.

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My heart hurts reading this :pleading_face: how scared this child must feel :pensive:

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What if there is a fire?! Call CPS!

That’s neglect and child abuse. Poor baby :cry:

Old style parenting, very 50’s strict. Not acceptable in this day though, never lock your child in any room, cupboard, shed or box, all of which have been acceptable in history ? Your child your life, if little person is safe and happy in your bed and you and your partner a ok with that, that’s what you do. Usually by the time they are 7 they tend to want their own space. Good luck, follow your heart and each child is an individual. :two_hearts:

Really you read to them before bed , set a routine and keep it. There will always be nights for everyone that we don’t feel like going to sleep but know we need to because we have stuff to do and need our rest. No try to think back as a child, why you don’t want to sleep, usually to stay up and play, right? If you explain to the child you need your rest so you feel happy tomorrow when you are playing or at school with your friends. Explain when you are too tired you are grumpy and don’t feel good, and eventually you get sick….so we all need our rest. That is what we do with our 3 year old. We always explain the why so he understands, we have a reason not just because. It has worked for us. Every child is different and so is every family. Locking children in any room is not ok unless you are with them and you are trying to protect them and yourself. The clothing thing, we have had nights where our son kept pouring water on himself to get out of sleeping, we changed his shirt but left him with no pants and made him sleep in a shirt and diaper , he learned the next day not to do that….yes he had tons of blankets and was cozy. I would maybe try a different approach with the friend, maybe this is what happened to them when they grew up and this is what they know, not saying it is ok at all but try to figure out where it is coming from, maybe have more play dates with more friends and maybe that parent will want to try new more positive ways to help the child. Us parents need to support one another instead of always jumping to point the finger, we need to work together and help one another in a positive manner.

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Is this for real? Why would you need to question wether it’s ok or not to lock a child in a dark room and remove their clothes?? Am I seriously the only one seeing a big issue here??? For fuck sakes, if you actually have had a conversation with anyone saying they do that to children and you haven’t turned them in then you’re apart of the problem.

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that is definitely NOT okay. by any means

Awww some good old childhood trauma. I can’t believe someone even has to be told that this is wrong. :woman_facepalming:t2::woman_facepalming:t2: Poor kid.

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Definitely child abuse and will have irreversible lifelong Emotional & neurological issues.

1st off all what is the childs reason for wanting to sleep in your bed, i know me myself it was bad dreams and i out grew that by about 5 6 years off age so maybe try and address the reasons 1st

That is not OK at all

My kids slept in my room I bought a bunk bed so they had there own space and so did I, my son is 9 and has only been in his own room for a week, u do what is right for u and your children

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My first born was exceptionally clingy from the time she was first born. I never planned ‘exercising’ attachment style parenting, but it just happened. We slept together almost every single night.
And GUESS WHAT?! She ended up passing away from cancer when she was 4​:sob: (that’s her on my profile pic​:smiling_face_with_three_hearts::heart_eyes::heart:)
I not only don’t regret all the nights we were so close, but I cherish them with all of my soul now.
Keep your babies close! You won’t regret it!
When they are ready, they will grow out of it. IT WILL NOT LAST FOREVER!

Listen folks, we all know that parenting is exhausting, but I’ve never understood why so many parents are so quick to turn young children away at night. Or to even have these unrealistic expectations… rhetorical Do you not want someone to cuddle with at night as a GROWN UP yourself?? We all want to feel safe around someone.

And yeah, those people telling you it’s okay to deprive a child of their basic human needs & rights were probably abused in similar ways as children themselves.
Don’t listen to those broken individuals.


That’s horrible. Poor baby.

Definitely not okay.

None of those things are okay my babies will fall asleep in their bed if I lay with them until they do. Even then they’ll end back in our bed. They’re just babies. They need to be loved and cared for.

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Definitely abuse! Please seek help or call CPS.

Poor baby it’s not ok I got lock up for not sleeping good Its no fun

I would never do that! I would just put them in bed with me. You need to pick your battles when it comes to children and I think this is a battle that’s not worth fighting over. I say that because I have 4 adult children who I would love to have 1 more day of them being a child.


This makes me sick.
I’ve heard of people locking kids in the room from the outside. I’ve also witnessed a child start a fire in an outlet in their room during a time like this and almost die because they couldn’t get out.



I’d be calling CPS. THIS IS CHILD ABUSE through and through!!

Not almost child abuse that is child abuse

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No you are not crazy at all that is abuse. Poor little one breaks my heart

Poor baby, I could never fall asleep knowing my baby is crying for me!!! I would never ever in my life take their clothes away so that they can be cold! Such cold hearted parents!!! :triumph::triumph::triumph:


Child abuse!! Please report it.


i co sleep with my children to a certain age then did the transition from my bed bed to their bed i did this by letting them lay on the bed then when they are asleep i would pick them up gently and move them on to the bed there was nights where they moved back on the bed but as soon they was hard sleeping I would move them back to their bed I did this until they got used to sleep in their beds. never lock a child inside their bedroom they would get scared and wouldn’t want to go back in it also its a fire hazard.

Wtf no its not okay.

Wtf?? Imo child abuse. No question about it… just wow.

I like pajamas for kids that have warm feet so that they stay warm all night. I also believe that children should sleep in their own beds at night. If they insist otherwise, you just might have a child that has taught their parent(s) well, and don’t think for a minute that it will change as they age. That’s not good parenting.


For sure not okay total abuse

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Report it asap call 911 you don’t know what else are they neglecting him food,water ect. You don’t time to discus this issue someone’s life is depending on you right now report it now.