Am I in the wrong?

Me and my boyfriend have only been together for 3 months . When we first got together I was pregnant , I lost my child and have been dealing with some serious depression behind it that’s throwing my energy entirely off . The child was not his , it was from my previous VERY TOXIC AND CRAZY relationship . When , we first got together it was rushed . I had just got out of a relationship and I explained this fully . He has a 4 year old from a previous relationship as well . I made it very clear I did not want to meet his daughter until at least 6 months . Things happened and we moved in together and started working together recently . So , now we never have alone time , personal space . This guy has done everything to save me . But , I am battling serious mental issues right now . And , he keeps pressuring his child into my life . Which I can’t mentally handle right now . I force myself too . I never allow arguments in front of her . I’ll ignore him fully before we even hold a conversation that doesn’t need to be heard to a child . Well , he now has her every weekend . So , I said maybe it’s best that when she comes over I leave and y’all spend daddy daughter time together and when she goes back to her mom’s , I’ll come back . I don’t want her to hate me cause’ my vibe is off . And , I don’t want to say the wrong things cause’ my mental health . I’m just going through a lot of healing right now . Serious Healing . And , he tries to not see his child instead and starts crying and throwing like the biggest fit like a 2 year old or something . Mind you I buy her toys and make holiday gift baskets since we’ve been together . I go all out for her . I love this child . But , mentally I am afraid to be around her . For SO MANY REASONS . Another note , I just lost Baby K and wasn’t ready for children to begin with . I don’t mind them . But , I am 22 . I’m a very selfish person . With my time , money , and energy . I rather invest that into myself than a child . So , I chose to get on birth control since he’s been begging me for a kid and said circumstances … I just need someone to give me the real … Cause’ I’m so ready to admit myself into a psych ward … I don’t have family to go too … I don’t have friends … If I leave me and my dog will be on the streets entirely since what we have is what we just created together . I love him . I love her . I’m just batteling things . No matter how much I explain to him he still does it or doesn’t understand … Any other options ? Tips on coping ? Tips on explaining … Someone please .

Maybe you do need to go to an inpatient unit. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with that. You need to help yourself before you completely fall apart and it takes even longer to recover. It may suck but you might need to step back from your relationship altogether. Especially if you’ve only been together for that short of a time and after losing a baby he is pressuring you to have one with him. That’s not normal. You both also need to consider what is best for his daughter. It is amazing that you love her so much but children get attached and don’t understand mental health needs. You might need to step back for her sake too. This honestly might just be the right relationship wrong time sort of deal. You need to have a serious conversation with him about this and seriously honey take care of yourself. Recovery from this will be harder the longer you take to actually get help. Mental health turns into physical health and you could get seriously sick.