I feel like you’re getting your feelings hurt by someone else not having the same kind of love as you do.
I’m sure your kid could care less 
you’re completely over reacting and that would be sad if you ended your friendship over something so childish
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Definitely overreacting some people have set schedule and if she works full time it’s inevitable that she won’t be able to make it to your child’s birthday party. Not worth starting a fight over it and loosing a friendship
Don’t bagg her to come…and stop going to all her kids events…
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She’s allowed to be upset, when you put alot of effort into your friendships and get nothing in return it hurts. Yes her friend doesn’t have to show up but your allowed to be upset over having friends that don’t contribute the same energy 
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Maybe she can’t afford to take off?! I know I’ve missed my best friends kids parties bc we couldn’t afford to go. My nest friend has also missed some of my kids stuff. I didn’t even mention it. Sometimes people have things going on in their own families/financial issues etc. I feel like you’re overreacting if your friendship will end over her not showing up to a party bc she has to work.
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Oh grow up 
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If you believe your friendship is going to end because your friend has a life outside of your child birthday then you’re never really her friend to begin with just because you go to all of her kids events doesn’t mean SHE HAS TO!! Now realize some people’s schedules don’t change. I work Monday-Saturday same hours day in day out. She deserves a better friend. You sound very selfish and needy. Also if I take one day off work that’s money I ain’t getting back, are you going to reimburse her for the work she would be missing etc. You are not the center of HER universe.
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If you let a friendship end over that, she deserves a better friend.
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Friends don’t always have to come to parties. Relatives don’t either
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I don’t take time off for stuff like that because I always end up needing my vacation days for stuff going wrong in my life. This year I used almost every single vacation day in maybe a month. We have 3 vehicles and every single kept breaking down. I couldn’t get to work. I had to go get a new car. You never know what someone’s dealing with. I’d let it go. If she at least tries to make it normally that’s something. If she never attempts to be with you or anything then I’d end it. If there’s nothing else going on I think you should try to let it go.
Nope not over reacting. I’d be pissed.
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Don’t expect people to be like you.
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Matt Thibert
This you😂
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I’m honestly torn because I understand her wanting to not miss a day of work especially if she’s got kids but I’ve been you in that I’ll go to birthday parties for my friends kids but no one ever shows up for mine. I have stopped throwing my daughter birthday parties all together and we just do something fun instead. It definitely isn’t a good feeling but unless she’s not showing up for every other part of your life I wouldn’t end the friendship over it.
You are overreacting ppl sometimes can’t take days and if your willing to throw away a friendship over this then I’d say your being childish. Ppl are struggling right now with the prices going up and ppl can’t just take off days of work for something like a birthday party. She may need her days off for if she’s sick or her kids get sick. When you have kids your lives no longer revolve around your friends.
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Maybe she doesn’t have extra time to take off because she uses her vacation for her children and everything they are involved in. Your child is 2 and won’t honestly remember nor care. Her situation may be way different than yours and she might not be able to afford to be as available as you
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Personally, that would never make me upset
You could always ask her what day would work best for her if you really would like to celebrate with her
I’m sure she’d rather hang out with you guys instead of working
But work is necessity
In todays society… I can’t afford a day off
-and I’m sorry, but yes. Even if it’s your kids bday party.
I think you’re being a little too harsh
I understand you being upset
But your kid will not even notice that she’s not there
Sometimes as parents
We think far into things
That our kids more than likely haven’t even thought of at all
We’re all grown adults.
And I think it’s unfair to feel that way towards your friend for taking care of her own business.
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If your willing to end the friendship with your BEST FRIEND over a birthday party for a kid who won’t even know if she’s there or not then THATS NOT YOUR BEST FRIEND and the reason literally doesn’t matter.
I missed my nephews (my best friends sons) birthday party this passed month she was bummed (so was i) he didn’t notice and had a great time he still loves me I still love them and we are all great. I can’t imagine calling someone my best friend who would end our friendship because I couldn’t make a birthday party at 2 years old (he was turning 3)
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You can’t expect You from people that are not You.
If she truly has to work, that’s pretty petty.
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Friends have lives to🤷🏻♀️ Maybe she is only allotted so many days, maybe she has plans later and needs that day. Who knows. I would get over it🤷🏻♀️
Her: hey I’m having a party for my kid
Her friend: ooo I’m busy that day
Her: i…… didn’t say a day
Lolol
I honestly would call her out on it but also laugh it off. It’s ok to be bummed she can’t make it but don’t end a friendship over it. Especially if it’s just this one thing she’s not going to
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Do you have to take time off to go to her parties and events? Or are you always available for those occasions. ALSO You only get so many paid personal days off, and if she has children of her own(whcih you said she does), Then obviously she’s going to use those days for her children, or vacations, or sick days. You’re being dramatic, Having to work is a valid reason for missing something.
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She’s selfish get rid of her. It’s about the kids❤
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If it really is that easy for her to change her schedule and you know this as a fact not just a guess then ask her why she wont change it when she can. Stop assuming and be direct with your friend, chances are she has a reason. Maybe she doesnt want to asl for a favor at work because then she’ll have to take a crappy shift. Just calmly talk to your friend. Also, maybe you shouldnt be rearranging everything for her, you may just depend on her more than she does with you.
Why do you feel the need to go to every single thing her child does? Maybe back away from going to every single thing and just relax about it. Maybe she can’t afford a gift…
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I’d be a bit bothered simply for the fact it’s not a two way road on the relationship, does she expect or ask you to attend all of her kids things as you do … I am always available and attend my friends kids things but I also keep in mind they work and I do not
You’re not wrong and she’s not wrong either. We do so much for people and we are ALWAYS there for them BUT we can’t expect them to be like us. I started treating people how they treat me. It’s not being selfish. It’s loving and respecting yourself and your time too.
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I wouldn’t end relationship but it would bother me too
If something as small as this is going to ruin your friendship then you really don’t have a very strong friendship anyway. You want her to take off work for your two year olds birthday party? Really? 
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I don’t think you should lose your friendship over it. Friends and relatives don’t come to parties or events all the time. I don’t know how many relatives or friends don’t come to my kids as parties and we’re all still good with each other. I can’t even make it to some of theirs it’s called life. I wouldn’t take it too hardly. If you guys have been friends for this long I’m sure you can work it out. No reason to lose a friendship over so silly stuff
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If you’re willing to throw away a friendship of 11 years over her not coming to your child’s birthday party, there’s something wrong with you. You’re completely overreacting. Grow up lol. Her world doesn’t revolve around you.
If it bothers you that much, why don’t you be an adult about it and just talk to her?
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Maybe she already agreed to work someone else shifts but yes over reacting
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I would be upset. It seems like she is your best friend but you’re not hers. I would NEVER miss an event for my best friend especially when it comes to her kids. And especially if you make yourself available to hers. I would either call her out on it or letting it go but act accordingly (which can also lead into ruining the friendship).
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Does she hv kids? If not there’s your answer! If she dose why not hv kid/kids dropped off
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That kind of thing wouldn’t make me upset! If you go to all of her life events because you’re expecting something in return then you’re doing it for the wrong reason. Also… if she’s your best friend how could something so minor end your friendship.
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Just end the friendship already. She deserves a real best friend
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Just because you give and give doesnt mean others have to. Honestly is it worth losing your friend over?
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I feel like you’re overreacting, you’re child’s gonna be 2, not even going to remember it or who was there, I still feel like you should talk to her about how thats made you feel with her straight dismissal to the invite
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Over reacting, my best friend has been my friend for 16 years and I don’t go to her kids birthday parties ever. I don’t host big blow outs for my kids just simple days. And I wouldn’t expect her to drop everything if I did host something bigger. We don’t have the same circumstances and never really have. She we don’t hardly see each other because we are adults and busy with our lives, and it doesn’t change how we feel about each other in the slightest. Things change when you grow up.
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Not all of us can just take off work whenever we want. I get that the two of you are friends but my friends and I don’t know every detail about one another’s lives or what we all go through behind closed doors. I hate to tell you but if I were ever in a situation where I have to choose between providing for my kids and taking a day off to attend a friend’s party who felt as though our friendship depended on said party, my kids will always come first. Perhaps instead of you acting like a spoiled brat you can check and make sure she’s okay and if you can do anything to help. We’re all in this together. It’s hard enough to survive in today’s world without everyone being hateful to one another and thinking only of themselves.
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You cannot expect to find you in other ppl, it’s just never going to happen. I’d honestly let it go. It may be that she said “she has to work that day” because she would like to avoid bluntly saying “I don’t like small children parties that are not of my own” Some people just don’t feel that it’s a place they should be or want to be on a day off. I’d definitely fall back from going out of my way to attend her events, and just keep moving forward with your babies big day!
Have you never thought she might be struggling if that be financial or mentally 
you’re being abit childish and if you’re willing to throw a friendship away over that then maybe it was doomed to start with you’re not being a good friend at all maybe ask her why or just accept it and move on it’s a party
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Over a birthday party you cause this much drama? What if her off days she needs and uses them as necessary? A child’s birthday party is never something I’d take off work for when it’s not my child. She’s got a life and responsibilities of her own. If you show up for her kids then cool but she’s not obligated to drop everything for you or your child. You might be able to drop everything and make it for her kid, that’s you. Not everyone can just drop something or call out of work. My child’s things get booked around mine and their fathers schedule so neither of us have to take off for it. I’d never call out of work for a kids birthday party. Also, some people have set schedules, I’m one, so yeah she could work that day.
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I wouldn’t be upset I’d just not make myself as available for her kids events anymore
Grow up…its a 2 year old !!!
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Ask her when is a good day for her and arrange for the party then. She how she reacts
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Wow. Then I suggest you let her know you’re that upset and end an 11 year friendship now.
My best friend missed a bunch of stuff, but also has come through when she didn’t need to.
She has a life and if she can’t make it, YOU as her bestest ever, should let her know how you feel.
But sure. End a real relationship because your feelings are hurt. - you are definitely overreacting.
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People show up to what they want to. She isn’t interested.
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YES YOU ARE OVERREACTING. IF you end your friendship over this then she is better off without you.
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Do you go all out because you have time
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So… my SIL invited us to their place (8hrs drive away) for Easter one year. I had been in my Job less than 12 months, hubby was in the same situation and we asked our boss for time off and got told no. We told my brother and sil we couldn’t make it and they lost their minds at us saying that if we really wanted to we’d have fought harder. They cut us off over it. That was nearly 15 years ago. Their loss. People can’t be so demanding over other people’s lives.
You don’t know that she didn’t already ask for time off. If you want to cut her off over it, then maybe she’s better off not having you as a friend.
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If this ends your friendship it wasn’t a very good one I n the first place…
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It’s a 2 year old party not surgery. People have lives to live also.
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Maybe she doesn’t like your kid?
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You ARE indeed overreacting. Pull back from going to everything and expecting people to be you. It’s okay to miss some things- we are human and have priorities.
The focus should be on your child, not all the other things in the world.
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Ending a friendship over a missed party is silly! Especially after 11 years. Who cares if she misses the party. Is she a good friend otherwise? Reliable? Trustworthy? Kind? Supportive? You get the picture. Maybe she can’t afford to take a day off for a birthday party. I sure as shit wouldn’t miss work for a kids birthday party. They have them every year! Important things like weddings graduation from high school or college those event are important as they happen once in a lifetime. (Well maybe except the wedding but you get the picture). Being a good friend shouldn’t be measured by if she came to your kids party. I didn’t show up to my own sisters birthday party and i love her to death and would do anything for her. This is a huge over reaction and selfish on your part to expect someone to do this just because you did. It’s like gift giving. You don’t do it because you want to get something back in kind in return…you do it because you want to and that’s it. No expectation of reciprocity. Silly shut to end an 11 year friendship over though. Petty and it says more about your character than hers
Really? You’re gonna END a friendship because of that? MAYBE…JUST MAYBE a coworker asked her in advanced or any number of valid reasons. Yeah it’s a bummer but your friendship shouldn’t be so fleeting based on what you’ve “done for her” and “she can’t do it for you” 
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So funny because I get the people saying “you’re overreacting” but I have THAT best friend…. The one where our kids and us do everything together…. So we literally coordinate birthday parties because our sons birthdays are just a week apart just to make sure we will both be able to attend …. I 100% get why you’re upset and I definitely think your feelings are valid. I’m sorry mama. Maybe talk to her? Tell her it would mean a lot if she was there ?
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its a party… not everyone can make every invite…
Idk if you’re over reacting per say, do I think it’s shitty? Absolutely. But now you just know that you should back off on some of her kids events??
I totally understand where your coming from but I wouldn’t let that long of a friendship end over that.
You’re going to end a friendship over a party Yes you’re overreacting. You should be doing those things for her kids because you want to. Not so she will return the favor.
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Lol you are so ridiculous!
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Ya… you’re overreacting. She just don’t want to go and that’s fine. People shouldn’t be obligated to do/go somewhere if they really don’t want too. Stop going to her kids stuff if you don’t want too.
You make yourself available or you just are. Other people may not be able to. She shouldn’tbe expected to take a day off for that. You are overreacting. I’d choose work over my friend’s kid’s party. I need money. A 2 yr. old isn’t going to give a damn.
I went to all my ex “friend’s” kids’ parties when she was close. I think she only ever came to one of my kid’s.
You never know what another person has going on in there life , maybe she knows that something is coming and hasn’t said anything to you be patient with her if this friendship is worth the time.? This is all up to you.
I waited hours for my friend cuz she was coming to my daughters party she kept saying she was on the way and then she couldn’t make it. My daughter was devastated she had no other kids to come and I moved her party to a Friday so they could be there cuz they had other plans for Saturday so needless to say it’s been 5 years and haven’t spoke to her since.
Okay I might be the odd one out here and that’s okay. I’d definitely be hurt. Well I’ve been hurt when people can’t show up for your kids the way you do for theirs. It’s a shitty feeling. Is she involved all the time with your kids? Or is this out of the norm for her? I’d base it off that. If she’s in it every other time I’d let it go, but if it’s a constant thing maybe it’s time to let the friendship go and find some other mama friends who match your energy. You sound a lot like me, but I enjoy being at everything for my friends kids. It’s important to me that they have a second mama force they can come too!
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I haven’t spoken to my father in 6 years due to him not attending my daughter’s birthday (he didn’t come to her 1st birthday either but her second birthday I double checked the night before if he was coming, offered to have him stay the night before and also offered to pick him up the day of and he said it was fine and he would be there) day of her birthday he got my Nan to call me to tell me he couldn’t make it 
When planning a party that I want everyone close to attend, I check which day would be best for everyone before setting a date and time. If you want them there… You arrange it so they can make it. Change it to a Sunday if she doesn’t work Sundays.
Depending on your child’s birthday it may be a black out week in her job I know holidays are always a no go including the week before the actual holiday because I work in sales and sales promotions are usually a week or two and it’s considered a write up if you use those days to call out as well.
Allow yourself to feel that way
You sacrifice for her kids she must do same
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Wow grow up maybe she needs the money or maybe she’s embarrassed she can’t afford anything. Hell it could not be her thing you choose to go to her kids stuff she doesn’t force you. Of your friend ship ends over this than she deserves better.
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Just take a hint! Perhaps you’re a little overbearing…
You’re overreacting lol. You’re kid won’t even remember who was and wasn’t there.
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You’re entitled to be hurt but try not to take it personally. Maybe she knows she can’t get the day off because she’s already taking a vacation at another time of year.
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Is it a mandatory work day? Some businesses have black out dates that employees are not allowed to ask off. For inventory or a number of other things….
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Ya that’s a bit much. I’m awful at getting to events. I forget about them or don’t plan well for them. I set plans with my family in advance and we’re still late or something comes up that is a have to or I know it will be the busy season for my spouse at work and it’s probably not going to work out. Not everyone pours everything into parties
Some people are petty. By some people I mean you! This is so ridiculous. People only get so many holiday days from work. If she doesn’t want to use one for your kids birthday that is ok she has her own kids and family to use them on. You are being ridiculous. Sorry for being abrupt but sounds like you need to be told how it is!
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I think you have a right to be upset but wouldn’t end a friendship over it.
My husband and I just had this conversation. We have a few friends with kids and we make it a point to go to all of their kids’ parties (will take off work if possible and if needed, skip naps that are absolutely necessary for our kids, drive a long distance, etc) but most of the time those same friends always have some excuse why they can’t make it to ours. I’m over making an effort to show we care when it’s not reciprocated. So we decided that we will no longer be going out of our way to go to their things. If it’s at a convenient time and place, we will go but we will no longer be adding stress to our life to go to these things if they can’t put forth the same effort for us.
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Just because your good about going to events doesnt mean others are. I would just talk to her about your feelings, but dont judge her if she really cant go. And dont do something silly like end your friendship over it
Yes, you’re overreacting.
Your child will never know the difference if she’s there or not.
Maybe something is going on personally, in your friends own life.
Make it a rule now never to expect the same things in return that you do yourself, or you’re always going to be let down and disappointed!
It’s okay… Maybe in the next 2 months things change and she does come.
Who knows but either way, it seems petty to be so upset that you would end your friendship.
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Not everyone is just like you.
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Wow! I wouldn’t wanna go either if that’s how your gonna be. Life happens. 
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Definitely overreacting.
I don’t think I would end a good long term friendship over it but I think I would suddenly find myself busy for her / her kids events for awhile
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My gf is trying to plan a vacation and I also know I cannot currently make it. Don’t assume.
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Grow up. If you put out energy you expect people to match you will be disappointed every time. People get busy. Sometimes they have enough of their own kids and all the crap they have to do that being a Ray of sunshine for other people around people is too much. She doesn’t have to show up just like you don’t have to be available for all of her kids stuff either.
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I get it it does hurt but sometimes people are broke lol and rather work and not miss, or maybe when she told you that she was bothered by her own issues and if shes your best friend she probably didnt mean it that way, sometimes friends get in bad moods lol ask her nicely again and she refuses again then just simply say ok thats fine bitch dont come and laugh lmao sorry something i would say to my best friend lol but dont donthings for her so that you can get things in return do them because you enjoy them and care for her otherwise dont do them either just as shes doing to you, the whole thing could be a misunderstanding just brush it off and dont loose a friendship over this and also dont be so sensitive to people now a days ppl are so weird about having best friends lol
Maybe financial issues? Maybe she has personal issues she doesn’t want to share? Maybe the place is understaffed so she knows she has to work? Don’t take it personal. Definitely not a reason to end a good friendship. Hard to find people there for you. And with that, she’s there for you as your friend, not your child’s friend. And now you know you don’t have to feel bad when you can’t make it to her child’s event.
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If that ends a friendship then you’re not really that good of friends. You’re being childish, it’s a 2 year olds party. You can feel hurt but ending a friendship over this is petty.
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My best friend of 34 years didn’t make it to my party, I never miss anything with her and her kids. But I’m not gonna end our friendship over it. Maybe she’ll surprise you
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I missed my best friend’s youngest childs birthday 3 years in a roll. 1,2,3 not purposely but it happened. I cried! It hurt me more than it did anyone else. She may not be able to have the day off for whatever reason. You are overreacting if you would end a friendship over that maybe you weren’t a friend in the beginning.
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I wouldn’t let it end the friendship but now you know where y’all stand so you can act accordingly from here on out!
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I’m assuming she works retail of some sort or food service since the schedule varies. If it’s a weekend party she may not be able to take off because those are the busy times for retail and restaurants. Currently a lot of places are short staffed so if she’s a manager or supervisor she may not be able to even ask for the busy times to be off. Personally I wouldn’t use a vacation day for a birthday party for a friends child when I can see them another time that doesn’t affect my job and income.
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She’s your friends not your family. Apparently she has good work ethics and a family of her own. Or there could be a specific reason she just doesn’t want to attend. How about being a grown up and ask her. Tell her that your upset and see what she says. That’s what a true friendship is all about. There should be zero reason not to discuss it with her.
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You are petty. I hope she finds a better friend.
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Some careers require you to submit day off requests 6 months in advance and even with that your request may be denied .Just a glitch in the road if you value this friendship .
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One of my bf had to miss my kids birthday due to work, I wasn’t mad at her whatsoever lol
Well, I wouldn’t end the friendship, but the next time one of her kids has an event and you can’t go or don’t feel like going… now you can stay home with a clear conscience.
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I mean I’d be upset too. It effects the kids more than the adults if you guys are that close. If she is a true friend she’d be there atleast for your child. It is kinda crazy she says she has to work unless it’s like a certain holiday or day she has to be at work. I have a few holidays I can’t take off work for.
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