There is a reason why many organizations, school systems, etc. require disclosure when two employees get involved. When both parties are married, what are the chances that will occur? Usually it is reported by someone else and then actions are taken to address the issue.Two divorces and broken hearts later…simply not worth the risk, in my opinion. In many situations, innocent flirtation progresses and before long…well, you know…
Absolutely, you should not feel insecure at all. Especially when she has a “thing” for your husband.
You get a stupid answer when you ask a stupid question.
First off let me state that your emotions are valid. You are allowed to feel however you feel about it. What you must not do though is try and dictate to him who he can and cannot be friends with. You cannot tell him who he can and cannot associate with. Maybe try getting to know some of these female friends of his for yourself.you could also try discussing with your husband how you feel, and why you feel that way. Regardless, sometimes in life we’re going to come across people who have “crushes” on our significant others. there will be guys who see you and think you are a very beautiful woman, there may be guys that will get to know you and think that you are creme de la creme. They’re going to be women who think the same of your husband. You guys cannot control how other people feel, you can only control how you feel and even then sometimes you can’t.the only thing that matters is if you can trust your husband. Do you know that you can trust your husband? Do you know that your husband is a loyal man who loves you wholeheartedly and who only wants to be with you? I would say those are pretty important things to know seeing as you’re in a marriage. I don’t feel like you have any reason to feel threatened unless you feel like your husband may act inappropriately and disrespectful. Other than work on communication and trust with your husband, that’s about all you can do
That’s great that you allow your husband to have female friends , you obviously trust him so I would be straight up
Tell him you dnt mind and it’s great but there has to be boundaries that we have to put in place
Than go rank on that bitch tell her you end mind them being friends but fuk the back up he is taken and happy so keep it at a friendship level if you can’t kindly leave him al9ne as he is mine and has chosen me
Context is everything
I think if he has always had these friends you should get over it.
I think it depends what you mean by friend. Like work friends or going out and hanging out type friend. I’m personally not jealous type so it wouldn’t bother me unless it’s just the two of them going out together.
You two won’t know everyone together. If you’re uncomfortable you two should meet. If she has a thing for him, he should back off on the friendship.
I dont really care. I mean, my fiance has female friends that I don’t know (I know of them) and I have guy friends who he hasn’t met yet. I
You’re married. You’re allowed to have lives outside of eachother, I think it’s perfectly ok to have friends of the opposite sex. If u were worried about other females why’d u marry him in the first place? Clearly the trust isn’t there
No I dont think your wrong. If these are long term friends from before you i would be less worried. But I dont think any married man or woman has a right to add woman/man on social media. It takes one conversation for an affair to begin. In a committed relationship neither should be looking for that attention.
Nope. If your not friends with me you damn sure ain’t gonna be friends with my husband!
If she has a thing for him… then no youre not over-reacting! Just normal friends though then im sure they would become your friends too
It’s your husband responsibility to make you feel secure and comfortable and if he isnt than you need to have a talk.
For me I reach out and offer my friendship to s/o female friends…if they deny then immediately no further communications between them
There’s two sides but both equally require trust. I’ve learnt from experience no they can’t be just friends as 'that connection 'may get closer…we’ve all been there when you feel something becoming more…if the lass has a bf a bit different but when she ‘likes’ your fella… Yea u unlike her. As I said two sides… trust your man or trust your gut…
You need to introduce yourself
If you don’t trust him, why are you with him?
If she has a thing for him they shouldn’t be hanging out
Oh no that hoe got to go
Do you trust him or not? Thats the only question that matters.
I have guy friends, most I knew before my husband. My husband always tells me he trusts me and that he knows he is the only one I want, so even if they had a thing for me he knows it wouldn’t get them anywhere.
If she’s interested in him then he should cut off this friendship out of respect for you, period
Just because she has a thing for him…doesn’t mean he is the same about her …trust him and let her be .
Its not her you got to worry about its him…of he got no intentions . With her then nothing to worry about …try get to know her…she maybe an ok chick.
It depends on if you trust him or not. Doesnt matter what we say about it lol
My question is why haven’t you met these friends…and no, I don’t see an issue with it as long as there is trust on both sides
Where there is smoke, there’s going to be a fire.
If he cares about your feelings and this bothers you, then he shouldn’t be doing it. How would he feel if you hung out with guys he didn’t know and who openly had a thing for you? It’s not about trust, it’s about respecting each others feelings.
If she has a thing for your husband then her intentions aren’t good!
Normal friends wouldn’t have a “thing for their friend” it gets cut off real quick I’m not jealous by no means but me and my husband don’t have friends just for them simple facts and doesn’t matter if you trust him or not most females these days straight hoes they will snatch a man from under you nose without u knowing
After being cheated on by every single person I’ve ever had a relationship with, I obviously have trust issues… my opinion is that there is absolutely no good reason why your husband has female friends that you aren’t friends with…unless she is a raging lesbian. It’s not about trust, necessarily. It’s more about a respect thing. If the chick has a thing for your husband, that is totally disrespectful to you and as such, your husband should tell her to bugger off.
I think if it was “just a friendship” you probably wouldnt be so uncomfortable. You have a radar and this female has obviously sent you red flags. Even if you dont know what they are. Then you edit it to find out she has a thing for him… he needs to stop the friendship. Women are conniving manipulative creatures. She will see any “niceness” and joking as him being flirtatious and it will encourage her to continue until shes convinced herself and him that shes the one he wants. She doesn’t care that hes married and will try to win him. If she respected your marriage she would have cut all contact once she realized she had feelings for him other than friendship.
I keep seeing a lot of people talk about trust. Do you trust him? Why are you with someone you dont trust? I’m sorry but that is CRAP. When you are married, sure it’s okay for you each to have friends of the opposite sex, HOWEVER there needs to be respect in those friendships. Those “friends” needs to understand that person is married, and once you get married you become one person. If they cannot or will not be friends with you and your spouse then that in itself is an issue. And if your spouse knows that you are uncomfortable with the friendship because of that reason and does nothing about it then that creates an even bigger issue. I fully trust my husband and have no fears or worries with his female friends, but if they dont have the decency to speak and be friends with me also then there is no need for him to be friends with them at all.
I think it’s fine for him to have female friends; if one of them has a thing for him and he’s married however, I think he should respectfully break off that friendship. I have been with people before where this has happened, and they stopped talking to the friend who has a crush and inappropriate feelings for them.
Seems weird if they’re not friends with you. My fiancé friends are all friends with me. And there’s only one female he’s friends with. Lol it’s all about trust
If you guys are married then yeah that’s totally fucked up you should have the same friends… In fact from that experience alone I would of left him. Guys cheat it’s a fact they do it all the time. Better to focus on yourself.
My husband has female friends that aren’t friends with me and I have male friends. If they have a thing for him Oh well. I cant control that he’s hot. I think so to girl. Lol. . But i trust my husband. And he trusts me so there’s no issue. It’s something you need to personally deal with. It’s not his fault. I don’t believe just because someone of the opposite sex has you feeling insecure means he has to cut ties. I don’t find it fair. I believe no one has the right to pick who your friends are.
Yeah I feel like you’re overreacting, but i understand completely. You’re allowed to have your feelings, and you’re allowed to express your feelings so your husband understands.
Who tf cares?
So what she has a thing for him!? As long as he won’t cheat then her feelings don’t matter
Our significant other’s are not our property. They are not a possession
If she is trying to sleep with him, that is a problem.
Work friends? Cant really control that. New friends that hang out? Weird. Hang out alone friends? Weird.
When my ex husband had female friends i would always try my hardest to become really good friends with them,and he hates it
The real question is do you trust your husband if the answer is no then that’s an issue you and him have to work on regardless of who got a thing for him if the answer is yes then he will let her know her place without you having to tell him to step back let him control this situation you don’t own him it’s a partnership not a dictatorship if there is an issue in your marriage that is you and his fault no one else’s…
My ex husband use to say stuff like I’m jealous of him, why are you hugging him.
So I stopped. Then it became, what happened to the girl I met?
Still trying to find myself.
Find the root of your insecurities. If he gonna cheat he will regardless. But don’t be with someone you don’t trust.
i have male friends an he has female friends. if you cant trust the guy your with or think every guy cheats you should try therapy
Get male friends see how he likes it
Alot of woman don’t respect relationships or marriage a d that would be my biggest worry. Nothing to do with the guy… some woman are nasty and ruthless.
People in relationships can have friends of the opposite sex. unless they’re sleeping with them I don’t see the problem.
I’m the only friend he needs 🤷🤷
Having friends outside of the relationship is healthy. Keeping friends a secret is when the problems come in. Just because she has a thing or had a thing for him doesn’t mean that he’s doing anything. Relationships are nothing without trust. Ask him to let you all meet. You never know…they may be completely awesome.
My husband has 3-4 female friends,his best friend is a female,I’m not friends with all of themI know them,and I guess I can call them acquaints, but Im not close to them like he is!
I trust him totally,he’s never given me a reason not too!
Are these new friends or friends or friends he’s had forever? New friends means he’s seeking attention from the opposite sex
A little different perspective. I work in a male dominated industry. More often than not when I am sent to a location I am one of the only, if not the only woman on site.
If it’s a short project, you’re work polite but don’t necessarily become “friends”. However, when it’s a LONG project, it is normal to make friends with your co-workers.
Being a woman, I ALWAYS go out of my way to not socialize alone with any of the guys until I know them VERY well AND know their partners are okay with it. (ALWAYS in public)
Anytime it’s possible I also go out of my way to include the wife/gf or at least meet her so she is comfortable. It’s a matter of respect, for myself, for my co-workers and for their partners. It’s odd to me that any woman would go out of her way to make friends with a man without going out of her way to include his wife/gf.
Seems questionable at best.
I feel like everyone has friends or acquaintances of the opposite sex. The real issue is… is he talking to them and hanging out with them without you? Why are they not your friends too? My husband and I have friends but we both know them all. If there is something that is making you feel uncomfortable then that needs to be fixed real quick.
Hell no your not overreacting I thought the same thing too. Next thing I know bitch is sending him “pictures” of herself. But honestly it takes two if you trust him to put them in their place to give you the respect you deserve as his wife you should have nothing to worry about. Talk to him and tell him your concerns and ask him how he would feel if the situation was reversed… good luck
I have learned by experience that once the trust is gone you may as well throw the relationship away. It will hardly ever go back to what it once was… but with that being said is he being untrustworthy? Are they hanging out alone? Honestly if he is married it shouldn’t matter who the women is or how she feels about him because in the end it’s in his hands to resist all temptation. I have also learned to go with your gut…: my heart and my head may steer me wrong but my gut is almost always right so I follow it a lot now. Best of luck with your situation
She should be friends with you too, or he should at least introduce you to her. But me personally, if she has a thing for my husband she needs to stay the hell away from him
Then get male friends, too, and also go out with them and see how he reacts. If he respects you, he should only be with you and not maintain any females in his life. Men are liars. Do not trust them. The next thing is he wants to replace you. Just be ready, get a good job and keep your money safe.
I can’t stand jealous people either you have trust in your relationship or you don’t
If she has a “thing” for him. Then YES it’s a problem. Listen to your gut instinct. And he needs to respect you and your marriage.
It sounds like he is not matured enough just to have you. He is like a high school kid that did not grow up.
I feel your overreacting. My husband has female friends that I’m not friends with and have no desire to be. They are work friends, they all go out and have drinks, lunches and get together if someone at work retires. I have no desire to be part of any of it, my husband says I can come but I don’t.
I would simply be very careful of the situation…very alert! And try to trust him a little. Unless he’s given you reason not to.
Long as female friend respects your marriage, acknowledges your presence, and is cordial, yes, you’re overreacting.
Oh. She has a “thing”? No, ma’am. She can go.
No your not overreacting because as a woman, that’s in love dont want no other female around her man.
Not wrong at all be on one accord so there’s no bs about nothing
Nope. Yr friends with my husband ur friends with me and uf u cant be friends with me then my hubby is dropping u
Sounds like u may have trust issues … I use to be like that but I had trust issues … and it’s no way to carry on a relationship !! Hope it gets better ! Xoxo even if the friend has a thing for him I would hope u would trust him enough and know he would cross that line … if they do BEAT HER ASS lmbo jk
It shouldn’t matter who his friends are but if you’re uncomfortable about one or one is into him and you know that for a fact then yes I would address it but I see it that in today’s world you need to worry about just anyone now but if you have issues with his just be aware if he has issues with yours you need to respect him as well.
Yes that is completely wrong. You guys are married and I’m not trying to be rude but you probably should just get over the fact that your husband has female friends because it could seriously ruin your guys’s relationship in marriage if you’re going to be jealous that your husband is friends with other females that’s just unrealistic for him to not have female friends. And they don’t have to be friends with you as long as they are being respectful and your husband is being respectful and not opening a door for them to flirt or anyting you have nothing to worry about so I would kind of chill out about this. But honestly I think that if they are your husband’s friends and you two are married then they should make it a point to sort of be friends with you too
Sorry but yes u are wrong. U are 2 individual people ur allowed to have separate friends of both sexes. My husband has friends that I’m not friends with and I have friends he isn’t friends with. Stop being controlling
Meh, I’ve been introduced to my partners girl friends to “make friends” and 3 months later she was in his pants. Even so called friends can go there.
If she has a thing for him then it’s definitely a problem. Even if you trust him conpletely, I wouldn’t want my partner hanging out alone with someone who has a thing for him and may try things.
A relationship as basic as friendship should have no gender or age limits
I wouldn’t worry about it personally. I would be too afraid of self sabotaging myself especially if there’s nothing going on. I would honestly just trust in my husband and relationship.
Only issue is the one who has a thing for him. My hubs has female friends who call or text him regularly, they even go drinking on occasion. As long as no boundaries are crossed, there shouldn’t be an issue.
My spouse was born in the same town as me but grew up in a city 4 hours away he has lots of female friends from School that I don’t know. I trust him, he says I could meet them but we have a 10 month old son and I don’t like travelling the 4 hours. he goes home lots to see his mom and friends. Communication is important
Females are scandalous. Sorry but it’s true. They seem to want men even more if they have a wife at home. There is no reason in my opinion for a single woman and a married man to be friends. I had a “friend” that had an obvious crush on my husband, it was crazy/shocking. Of course she has a “thing” for your husband. He’s happily married! That’s just how females are
Mine has had female friends since before we met, one is his best friend. Sometimes they hang out together and sometimes I’m there, we’ve been together 15 years I’m not threatened at all.
My motto is “ no new friends “
It’s wrong. If his female friends are not trying to become friends with you they have no business being around your husband. And the lady who has a thing for him needs to step away.
Sorry but my thing is if you can’t trust your partner why be with them I have mostly guy friends only a couple are also friends with my hubby my hubby has chick and guy friends I only associate with the ones both of us know and get along with as does he no problems in my marriage you can’t say your partner can only be friends with who you like that obsessive
Personally I think he should cut off this woman who has a thing for him. Personally I wouldn’t like my husband hanging out with a female friend by himself. I trust him but at the same time better safe than sorry. He feels the same about this too.
Trust your intuition!
Reality is men will always have friends we don’t know(co workers, ex girlfriends , high school
Classmates etc… And vise versa sometimes. It’s how he treats you, does he lie about this activities. Is money and time coming up missing. I can’t control who my man is “friends” with but if that friendship(s) affects our home THEN HOSTON WE HAVE A PROBLEM
I would have squashed that
Okay girl… you are wrong in this case! I mean come on give him some space same as you want for yourself! There would be an issue if there is “SOMETHING” between them and your husband is all hiding about it. So just chill down. Relax!
Your husband has a right to have his own friends and you have a right to have yours. If you can’t trust him or you feel there’s something going on, confront it. Don’t be with a man you can’t trust. That’s not what a marriage is.
If one of them has “a thing” for your husband, that’s totally inappropriate.
My husband has female friends. There are definitely some that I made it clear to him that I’m uncomfortable with him being around them, because of how these women are… but other than that . If he’s dumb enough to cheat then she can have him LOL but I trust his friends and him. I’ve met them all, they’re all good shit lol.
I think it depends. If he purposely avoids us meeting, hangs out alone or all the time, yeah probably red flags to me.
Trust your husband. Once trust is lost…it’s gone. Also, communication is key. My husband has many female friends that I haven’t been introduced to. If it makes you feel uncomfortable if he hangs out with her…say you want to meet her/his friends. If he puts up a fight about and isn’t forth coming then those would be some red flags.
Trust your husband or leave him. That’s your options. I’ve had friends who’ve admitted to having a crush on me, I told them i didn’t feel the same way/or was taken, we stayed friends. My boyfriend knows I wouldn’t cheat on him and I know he wouldn’t cheat one me. He actually has mostly girl friends and I get along with all of them. One he even dated for a bit and they have a three year long snapstreak. BUT I tust him. I know him. He would never. 💁
I would not like him to have female friends that can’t be friends with me. I have a male best friend and i make sure i befriend his spouse because he is like a brother to me. Now if she doesn’t want to be open to a friendship, that’s on her but we are like a family so my bestfriend is involved in every family thing.
My best friend is a guy. I’ve never met his wife. I knew him when I was 15. We lost touch until about 1 1/2 years ago. We talk a lot. We hang out. But it’s platonic. We are both married. I don’t think it matters or is an issue.
Comes down to trust. My boyfriend has plenty of friends at work both male and female most of whom I’ve never even seen let alone talked to but i trust that if one was being inappropriate he’d shut it down (be it knowingly or not who knows it took the man 2 months to realize i was flirting with him) just like he knows i have male friends but wont have them if they try anything funny. If you can’t trust him, why be with him in the first place.
Lol i wouldnt overthink it if your husband isnt entertaining. Marriage doesnt mean you have to share mutual friends all the time, yes you come as a couple but its not abnormal for your partner to have friends that are not yours. It sucks for someone to have a thing for your partner but if he isnt entertaining it theres no issue. And NO someone having a thing for your partner does not mean he is doing anything deliberately to insinuate that.
Its totally okay to have friends of the opposite sex. She should not act on her feelings for your husband and your husband should set boundaries with his friend…you know " Hey we are good friends but you have to know it will never go further then that" type deal. She can accept it or lose the friendship. Talk to your husband. He might want support in how to address.
I personally went through this with my husband and it was a little ruff at first , I never had any problems with him or our relationship but when I noticed he was friends with a few sales reps from his job that new me but didn’t ask me to be friends , and was even messaging him . I put my foot down really fast . It’s not ok at all , I don’t care if you talk at work but there is no need to be messaging outside of work. It is extremely disrespectful and I think sends a bad sign to single women. And I told him I would never do that to him . It’s just over all not respectful .
I like how it was “edited” after everyone said “it’s okay to have your own friends”
She’s just jealous which means you don’t trust your husband and that’s a BIGGER problem.
It’s not wrong to have friends of the opposite sex. She likes him… well it won’t be an issue unless if your husband plays along with her “liking”. If he is trustworthy & faithful… hell take it as one hell of a compliment!! That means you have a hot ass husband & you’re the one he chose to marry n be faithful to.
my opinion at least!
You either trust him or you don’t. Most of my friends are men and most of my husbands are women. If he is going to cheat there is nothing you can do. If he is faithful there is nothing any other woman can do to make him cheat.