Don’t give him access to her SS#. I have a friend who’s ex got credit cards in his child’s name. By the time her child was 18 , her credit was ruined! (He had listed the child as his spouse and used his ex wife s DOB!)
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He would have to lie and say she lives with him to qualify for any type of assistance. It’s the parent whose address kiddo uses. If he really wants it that bad, he legally can go get it himself. Don’t make it any easier on him knowing what he’s going to do. Also…at putting more effort into him than he is to you or your kid. He’s just going to keep pushing the envelope.
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Don’t give it to him and you better file for child support! Why let him have it easy. He should help support his daughter. That’s just crap!
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Do not give the numbers to him. You are going to need to file for those things! If he can go to parties & order out he doesn’t need them, you will for WIC or food stamps. Alot of parents put their kids in debt by utility in their name and such. Go for child support also, that goes to your child!
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Don’t do it ! He can use it for credit all kinds of things he can ruin her credit before she can grow up and use it herself.
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No you are not selfish YOU have the child at home with you, don’t share that at all. He needs to get a job…
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Definitely fraud for him and for you as well. You know it’s wrong or you wouldn’t be asking about it. It is hard to say what kind of bills he runs up using that child’s number. You better get rid of him, he sounds like a no good scammer. Open your eyes lady and think of your child. Good luck, hope you don’t end up in jail.
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That’s a great question! I think you’re really lucky to have to only pay 200 bucks a month for healthcare (mine is near 500). But it seems your question is a moral one. Would me giving him her information, which if you have a court case open is mandatory, constitute fraud on your part? My opinion is no. Just like his finances, you don’t and shouldn’t have any say in what he does that doesn’t affect your daughter. Most likely he won’t get the assistance he’s asking for, due to the reasons you stated, but does need your daughters info to apply. From a father with a mixed family, my advice is to enjoy your new family and not worry about his life so long as he is loving your daughter the best he can. Congrats on the new baby and best of luck making the ends meet!
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You shouldn’t give it to him, but as her father he can get it from the Social security office legally with the right documents to show he is her father.
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You only don’t have a say in how he utilizes HIS money but part of that money belongs to you for the upkeep of his child and you have been more than patient waiting for him to do his share. Do NOT give him her social and file for child support IMMEDIATELY before he gets it some other way. If you have to file for government support, they will make you file for child support first. If he is already receiving support then you will have to go through a bunch of crap to prove that he doesn’t support you and he will get busted for the fraud. You are all better off. He needs to pay his bills before indulging himself. It’s been a year stop enabling him.
if you have custody, I see no reason why he needs documentation on her. He’ll be committing fraud, and they’ll hassle you thinking you’re helping him. My ex SIL tried that to get food stamps, said he had custody and had the kids more than 50% of the time. They took my daughter to court for non payment of child support, threatened to take her driver’s license and the nursing license she had just gotten. Don’t give him paperwork.
He could also file his taxes using her as a dependent which would keep you from filing your taxes using her as a dependent. Which is not right since you provide over 50% of her care and then some.
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Why should you and your family (his child included) struggle while he’s collecting benefits on her behalf and spending frivolously?
I would tell him no and list your reasons
- Collecting benefits for her means he should be providing 50% or more of her care and he’s not.
- You may need to collect the benefits and they WILL benefit his child.
If he needs more money, maybe he needs a second job…
or better paying one… or cut back on expenses (that’s how the rest of the world works)
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Omgoodness are you serious? Keep those documents to yourself. My x tried that. He was to pay me child support and he wanted to tell welfare he had our children more than me but yet they lived w me…I bathed them…feed them…clothed them…took them to the doctor etc. If your ex is buying video games and eating out…you bet your butt i would keep those documents! Make him grow up…if he really wants to take care of his child he wouldn’t make excuses and he would be willing to help you. Your enabling him. Stop that! If he can’t get a better job and grow a pair…he doesn’t need to be eating off the good gracious of you and your child.
Nope not at all! He could also use her SSN to claim her as a dependent on his taxes and get more $$ for his return
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I would file for child support, get custody in writing, and at this time would not give him social. If he can show he is responsible parent then I would rethink giving him her social.
If he gets public assistance and claims his daughter you would end up having to pay the welfare department child support because he is getting money and food stamps for her from them.
Trust me when I say this. I work for the welfare department.
sounds fine as long as it is used properly… i know cases where they used it for credit. and destroyed their childs credit before they were old enough to have credit…be careful
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No, please do not give him any of her papers because you are already supporting your child, and if he is not doing his part, you can apply for assistance and they can just remove it from his pay. Also, do not let him use her as a dependent because you are the one supporting her. Good luck
It sounds more like he wants to file her as his dependant on taxes which is also tax fraud if he hasn’t had her 6 months out of the year or you have a court order stating who claims the child when. While withholding it could be seen as an issue, I would wait. Just my opinion. May not hurt to ask a legal representative
He is a grown man, he can take care of himself. You two are divorced for a reason. Helping with food is one thing. It wouldn’t matter who it is. I will help you, commiting fraud absolutely not. At this point you have to say to yourself what is my focus in life? Please make the right decision for you and your children.
Don’t do it. You know he will be committing fraud with it. That makes you accessory. Additionally, that’s all he would need to claim her on income taxes which could potentially throw a wrench in your filing. If he’s not contributing to her care, he’s not entitled to benefit from her.
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What kind of “man” would ask for it anyway? You better not give it to him!
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please for you & your daughters sake, DO NOT GIVE IT TO HIM! there are to many things he can do!,… claiming her on taxes, you have the right to, he doesn’t, but who’s to say he wouldn’t,…,… maybe he would be getting assistance for someone who does not reside with him, your daughter,… her credit score could be ruined before she is even of age… Please protect your daughter & yourself! Oh forgot, Take Him for Support! Your Daughter Deserves It!
NO!!! DO NOT GIVE IT TO HIM!!! Probably going to file taxes too and then you will be out of luck! Time to make him grow up and file for support. If he gets mad then oh well you ha e been over accommodating him for some time!
Do not give it to him! He’ll claim her on everything including his taxes. You’ll be screwed trying to take him to court and prove it all. Just politely let him know you can no longer give him the easy road. You must put the child’s best interest first. Grow up or go away.
Dont give it to him. You pay more than 50% of her care. He wants to commit fraud and could file his taxes with her as a dependent and you would be out of luck.
Do not give him nothing ! How dare him even asking when he’s not even helping ypu take car of the child! None of my ex husband’s had ssn or birth certificates when my children were little. He also if he has the ssn will try to file the child on his taxes .He’s trying to commit fraud you do not need to be involved in any part of it.
Saving him from child support seems more than enough. He will never stand on his two feet as long as you are dragging him along. He gets to enjoy and play with his money, partly because of you. If he want those documents he can get them himself for about five or six dollars without your involvement. Unless that is too much to pay. Look out for yourself and your child or children and stop being his enabler. If I was him I would be to ashamed to ask. Allow him to grow up. You are not his mother.
I would contact legal aid and find out just what your responsibilities and rights are in this situation. Sounds like you could use some legal advice. They should be able to tell you something useful.
This is fraud. Don’t do it. The issue that I see is if he wants to claim her and get public assistance then they will come after you for child support. My ex did this and caused an investigation and he was found to be committing fraud.
Wake up girl ,he is using you and your child,if he wants it he can get it himself,get your butt up and file child support.he can afford to party and eat out but sure isnt worried if his child eats.you need to grow up. stop letting him ride the pity train and make him be resposable also for his child,good luck
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Go to Child Support Enforcement immediately and file for child support. With her SS#, he can get credit cards, put utilities in the child’s name, first to file gets the earned income credit, and if it’s not you then you have to prove it in court.
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If he files for public assistance with your daughter, the county will sue you for child support because the county wants their money back from the other parent!! Do not let him file with your daughter, you’ll end up paying back the county!
Dont enable him to treat you like he does. He has become too comfortable and needs to be uncomfortable in his wrong decisions
My ex husband told me our sons information was “stolen” and then filed taxes on him and I couldn’t do anything about it because we were so newly separated. All would have been good if he spent any amount of that on the baby, but of course he didn’t. I don’t trust him for anything now.
No you are not selfish you have been more than generous with him. It’s time for him to support his daughter. Do NOT give him her social security number I am sure he also wants it to file taxes with as he would get a lot more money if he claims her not to mention all that stimulus money. You have done enough for him it’s time he takes responsibility for his child.
Keep her numbers to yourself. He could very well try to claim her on his income tax. And you know how he spending his money so he doesn’t seem like a very good provider. He doesn’t seem to care about you or your daughter. I hope he has a job. Look after yourself and your daughter first
He doesn’t care enough to support her, he can use that for filling taxes and claim her for many other things and you will not be able to.
DO NOT GIVE IT TO HIM and for future fraud and taxes keep the number away from her till she absolutely needs it so he cant get the number out of her and teach her not to give it to him
Dont give him any of her information like that. You are raising her with out financial help from him…its bot selfish to file for those things yourself since she is in your custody…plus if he does try to claim her on His taxes that will prevent you from getting your refund as easily when you need it as a single working mom…
Nope! Too much at risk here. You could be charged as an accessory to fraud and lose your daughter! He’s a big boy and can go get his own job, unless he has a problem you haven’t mentioned. He doesn’t sound mature enough to handle important documents, either. Most important right now is your daughter and the baby to come and YOUR health so you can take care of your babies. and don’t let ANYBODY tell you otherwise. Stomp that foot down, raise that chin up and carry on, Mama! 
He’s probably trying to claim her on income taxes as well. If he does this right, it’ll look as though you should be paying him child support. Be careful. I wouldn’t do it.
No, you’re asking for your daughter to be the victim of identity theft.
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If he works have them take out his check …can u go apply for medicade for yr baby and one u are carrying. See if they can help u…but he needs to be paying child support for his child…don’t let him be a dead beat dad.
Don’t give him her social! Not only is it fraud but it also gives him a way off claiming her on his taxes and if he files before you you are screwed. My grandsons other grandparents have asked for his SS number several times saying they want to get a life insurance policy on him for his future, to hell with that, their POS of a son has never payed child support and has very little to do with him and my daughter and I agree he has no right to have any copies of birth certificate of SS number so he can stake any claim on him whatsoever…
He is her father, and if her wants those documents, he is more than capable of obtaining them through the normal channels (purchasing certified copies) on his own. He literally doesn’t even want to do the footwork or have the financial burden of getting the documents so that he can illegally use her as his meal ticket, I would tell him to get bent. A child is not a pawn.
If she resides with you and you pay for all that absolutely not!!! You can be implicated in a fraud case against the state.fpr misrepresenting her living arrangements and bills. You need to do what’s best for you your children and your household he can go to food pantry and such.
No no and no. If he can do all those things then he don’t need to do fraud and apply for stamps. Then he may be trying to carry her on taxes. No no no. You apply for stamps. Girl hell no. He’s on a mission to do wrong and he ain’t helping you. No no no. Please no. You go apply for child support. ASAP
First and foremost: FILE FOR CHILD SUPPORT. If he has money to go out to eat, he can pay child support. FYI, if he doesn’t pay now, it will continue to be taken from his checks even after she turns 18.
Also, if you have primary custody, the only way he can legally claim her is you signing IRS Form 8332. If he does claim her, he can be held liable for repayment of the fraudulently claimed refund.
FILE FOR CHILD SUPPORT!
Let him figure out how to get to your place. Make him take some responsibility. DO NOT GIVE HIM HER INFORMATION!
I am an Enrolled Agent, licensed by the Department of the Treasury to practice before the IRS.
You’re her primary caregiver and sole financial support. Do not give him anything with her information on it. He wants to claim her on his taxes that’s it. Also, take him to court for child support. It’s his responsibility.
Don’t give it to him. He doesn’t need any of her info for government assistance. She doesn’t live with him so he can’t use her to get assistance. And sounds like he want to file taxes using her as a dependent.
In my state of you file for assistance when you share custody they automatically file for child support from the other parent. He will be found out and if he falsified any information he will get in trouble. I’d say give it to him. Let him make his own bed. You shouldn’t have to be thinking about all his crap on top of what you have going on.
Don’t because if he claims her on his taxes any stimulus check will go to him.So until u come to a agreement on things I would say no.
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You have full custody of her. You are entitled to claim her on your taxes not him. My ex tried claiming my kids for himself because he was selfish with money. He had applied for new social security cards and they went to my new place with the change of address. At the time we were going though our divorce. The judge said I can claim them since I was the sole custodial parent.
Don’t give it to him. Besides this fraud and him possibly trying to file taxes, I have know non support parent using children’s SSI to get credit cards .
Do not give him that information…they will go after you and if you try to file for help you will be denied any help because you knew what he planned to do with it when you gave him that information. And with the time of year it is he could be claiming her on his taxes to get the child credit…always keep that number to yourself
This is a no-brainer situation. He would be committing fraud and you would be an accessory. I would not give him her social he doesn’t contribute you’re not asking and he is spending his money frivolously. At some point in time you are going to need him to pay child support which he should be doing already. It’s time for him to grow up. I think he has a lot of nerve asking for her social security number so that he can commit a fraud. You better think about all of these things and make sure you do what you need to do for your child and for yourself don’t become involved in his shenanigans.
Do not give him the information to file for assistance. It will give them access to the welfare and or placement of your daughter. Take him to court for or see a Attorney to file for child support from him. You should not have to take her to and from his house for visitation.
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It’s fraud and since you know what he wants to do they might be able to take legal action against you if you help him commit the fraud I’d say don’t do it
If your worried about your daughter having food while their prepare her enough meals and snacks and send them with her I know it’s not your responsibility to feed her while she is with her dad
Just don’t give in and help him commit fraud
Ive been there in almost the same situation, do not give him any info as he does not need it. File for public assistance if you need to when time comes and file her on your taxes asap so that he doesn’t try to.
Absolutely not!!! Strange he’s asking right here at tax season, not to mention he’ll be committing fraud. If he can afford to eat out & buy video games, I can assure you he doesn’t need as much help as the mother of his child that is paying for all his daughters needs!!
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Will your daughter suffer the consequences of her father getting public assistance that should be used for her needs while he continues to order takeout, party, and order video games? If so, then do not give him the info. It is not selfish to act in the best interests of your child!
I would just tell him I’m not comfortable giving you that information since you have admitted that you plan to commit fraud with it. BUT that if he wants this information he can go and obtain the documents himself like you had to. This way it takes him some time to get them but also if he does eventually get them you had no part in aiding in the fraud.
I wouldn’t give him anything. If he is gloating that he is partying and having fun with his friends, then he can provide for himself. Claim her as your dependant instead on the papers. He only has weekend visitation while you have primary. I am glad that you’re trying to be decent and nice to him, but it sounds like he needs to grow up.
If you give away this info, just know he could try to take custody after filing all this information with the proper sources and thus have “proof” the child is living with him.
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I have a friend who’s ex husband used that information to open cc’s in their child’s name and several other things. They didn’t even know about it until she started to ask for credit herself. It was a nightmare. You already know he’s willing to lie about it… don’t give it to him
If you give him that and he files , he will also have the rights to file for child support and they will tell him he needs to, so u will be taking care of her and paying him child support. Are you wrong ? No he isn’t supporting her at all why would you give him the info to get benefits saying that he is ? But he is her father and he doesn’t need your permission to go to the service offices and get it himself. At that point if he files for benefits you will have the question , should you report him for fraud ?
No way does he need her social security number especially if it is to commit fraud. If he can afford take out and video games he can afford food.
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No, don’t let him file on her, he doesn’t deserve it. He shouldn’t use her or you that way. If he wants to see her he would find a way to be a better daddy.
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If you do give him SS number he can claim her first on taxes. If you do challenge his rights to claim her it is up to him to prove he provided more than half her living expenses and medical/dental cost. At this point you really really need to take him to court for child support. Where would you be if you lost your job or you had prolonged sickness? Then there would be a record of what he pays which will show it’s only a fraction of what it cost to provide for her.
You’re not keeping him down. You’re supporting his child. He needs to support himself. If he needs aid, he needs to apply the correct, and legal way. You do not help someone, even your child’s father, to commit fraud. Do not do anything illegal! It’s up to him to take care of himself.
When I divorced my husband and filed for custody. I said if I want my kids to live with me then I shouldn’t need money from him, he did the same. We just split school clothes and medical, I carried the insurance part. We didn’t necessarily follow visitation rules either- it was whom was off the weekends and holidays. It was about our kids with us.
Do NOT give him her personal info. It is against the law to commit fraud and that is what he would be doing and using her name to open acct and ruin her credit for when she gets older. He is the dad he should be paying child support. If he has $$ to party and go out he has money to pay you!! Just sayin!! 
why is this even a question. The fact that this post required me to SCROLL down to read all the trials and tribulations that a mother is going through, is the reason why you shouldn’t. Your only responsibility right now is to yourself and your children. From what I read, it looks like they will be depending on you.
I wouldn’t give him the information. He can use it to hurt you in too many ways. He may claim her for income tax reasons and get the child care credit. If he files first you are out if luck. I would file my taxes asap and fill out your information for WIC. If you qualify I would take any food stamps that are offered to you. Even if it is $10.00. After you get food stamps if he persists, I would talk to a social worker and follow their advice. Maybe even legal aid.
Do not give it to him ,especially if he is not supporting his child ,you will live to regret it later and there will not be anything you can do about it he could even lie and get the courts to garnish your wages for child support and it will cost you alot to get everything cleared up don’t trust him period everyone is not kind .
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He doesn’t seem to have a legitimate reason to need it. As stated, he isn’t entitled to any type of benefits for her as he is not the primary nor does he support her financially half of the time. You’d only be opening the door for bs later if you have to file for benefits to help you and your family. Also, if he used her social to fraudulently claim her on his taxes, that’s a time consuming mess you don’t need.
Been there done that. Most likely will not change. DO NOT give him your child’s important docs. What he wants to do is fraud and you are a ready and willing participant if you do this. He is able-bodied and there are plenty of ways he can find to make money if he really wants to…which he has proven that he does not! He is PLAYING you whether you think so or not. Your description of his behaviors is ages old and guys like him are 2 cents a dozen. Wake up and smell the coffee. Re-read what you wrote about your situation and if you do so with an objective mind I believe you will find your answer. ALSO…a good relationship takes two with the desire to have a good relationship…you are working way to hard.
The only one who should have a copy of her legal documents is HER. They are her documents. You have primary custody, that means you keep the documents for her until she is grown. With those documents he can turn on utilities in her name, get credit cards etc. have known people who have done just that!!
Seems a little bit bogus… You and he were married. You have a daughter together, you probably filed taxes together… He can get that number from a number of sources besides you…
So if he is trying to commit fraud to get food stamps, he spends frivolously, and parties with his friends, and buys video games, doesn’t pay any child support, what would stop him from also using her social security number to get credit cards, and utilities? Sounds like someone is lazy, doesn’t take responsibility for his actions and wouldn’t care if he ruined her credit before she has an honest chance at things in life. If he was a standup guy, he would be putting his daughter first.
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Yes I wouldn’t give them to him because it would be a lie for him to use them. You need to toughen up and file for child support. You kid needs it and sounds like it would help out a lot. Don’t worry about how he will feel because if he is any kind of a dad he won’t mind paying it.
If you give it to him you are just as guilty as he is. It’s time for him to start adulting, and it’s time for you to stop enabling. He can get it on his own, he is her father. Unless a judge orders you to give it to him, at which time I would ask for child support, I would pull in the reins and worry about providing for your daughter and your household. Clearly your ex could care less.
Nope if he isn’t paying child support I wouldn’t do it either. If you are struggling go apply for assistance they seem to really be helping those affected by the vid. For all my ex’s faults I never had any of these issues. He took care of his children always. (By court order but still)
Honestly, don’t bother giving it to him. All he has to do is provide proof at the social security office that he’s her father and they’ll give him a copy of her social security card. Sounds like he is trying to commit fraud for what he says he needs the # for… Let him get himself into the hot water without your help. If it was for taxes, or… just about anything else… sure… but to commit fraud? Nah.
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I mean I dont know the conversations but if he is filing for food stamps for himself alone they still want the info on the child even if he only has partial custody because he would get a small amount for days she would be with him ie weekends and such not to mention she may the qualify for some medicaid benefits as a secondary insurance which would take some financial burden off of you.
Been there done that. Do not let him have the SSN#. You will be just as guilty if he dies try and commits fraud. The medical card maybe, if she gets hurt or needs to go to the hospital/Dr.
No do not give it to him. He wants to fraud the state for food stamps etc. You are supporting her so he is not entitled to those things.
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First off I would make copies of all legal documents pertaining to your daughter and give them to your parents, siblings or someone you know will look out for her best interest in the event something were to happen to you. 2nd tell him he can have the information but let him know that you will be filing for assistance when the baby comes and DSS will investigate why both of you are claiming her. Since you can prove you have her the majority of the time let him know DSS will come after him for fraud which can hail jail time and/or a fine and he will have to pay the money back. That should change the whole situation.
He should be paying child support. He has visitation. And you do all the running and taking care . He will not like it but hell you have to live too. He is having all the fun and needs to the teal wirldto grow up
Do not give that child’s social security number.
He could open credit cards in her name.
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Don’t do it. You are taking care of her most of the time. He needs to get his act together and start paying child support. He could do so many wrong things if u give it to him so I wouldn’t.
He has the best life. Have a child and don’t support it. You are not showing your child what responsibility is.
I don’t know what state you are in but my state if you get financial assistance the other parent has to pay child support to the state be careful
He can file for food stamps on his own they would give him if eligible only for 3 months because he is able to work anyway, I believe. He does not need her ss if he does not ever even try to give you anything for her besides you take care of all her needs there is nothing he needs it for on there visits. Prayers for you, your new baby and your family!!
As I was reading this I was thinking I would not give him her # he wants her SS # for filing his taxes. If he files her as his dependent you cannot claim her as your dependent. He will also have her # and can use it for many other things.
Don’t do it, he does nothing to provide for your daughter it’s all you. You owe him nothing and you have all the custodial rights
I wouldn’t give it to him, but if he is on the birth certificate he can go get copies. As an extra measure I would go ahead and have her social security number flagged. That way you will know if he is trying to use it.
That’s a grown man. He should be able to provide for himself. I would not give him her information so he can get food stamps. If you can make it caring for your daughter, he should be able to make it on his own.