I have four kids - 16,15,11,10… my husband wants another baby. We always agreed four was enough, but now he wants another. Am I selfish by saying no? I’m 39, and I feel I’m too old
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What’s one more? 
If I wanted one more I would pray my husband would jump on board. I get it I’m 36 but gosh kids are awesome and I love babies. But I only have two and it seems you will have lots of help with your age range. Mine are 7 and 8 and they would be over the moon 
You’re not wrong at all
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You are not selfish! It’s your body and your life. That’s like starting all over. I had my kids young. They’re 15, 13 and 8. I don’t want any more kids!
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Definitely not wrong. But talk him through it
No way would I be having another kid at 39. I said I wanted to be done by 30, our last was born 3 months after I turned 30. I love my kids and I love babies but no way I could start over lol
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No, not at all. It’s your body, your health and life on the line and there are always other options to consider if it’s just the pregnancy you don’t want to go through… but you aren’t selfish. Talk to him.
You’re not wrong. But I don’t think you’re too old either.
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Tell him you’ll consider fostering a child thats around 5 or 6 but not a newborn if that’s an option you’d consider. Maybe he just doesn’t feel the family is complete. And that’s valid. But there are other ways to grow a family.
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Is he delusional does he realise how much children cost you have 4 more than enough totally wrong that he is pushing for a 5th no way is that reasonable
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Not selfish… you are being honest. If you both don’t agree then you shouldn’t have another child.
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No, you’re not. You agreed at four so you set your heart and mind at that. He needs to understand as well.
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Girl don’t do it:grimacing: my kids are 15,14,12,9. Everyone around me is either pregnant or just had another kid. They started over and I see it in them that they wished they wouldn’t of. I mean they love their baby but wish they wouldn’t of gotten pregnant. (On the flip side you’ll always have a sitter 
) I thank god everyday I only have these 4 and my tubes are tied. Enjoy the kids you have now and save your sanity.
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You are not wrong at all. My husband and I have 5. Just had our baby girl 3 months ago and I’m 36. It’s so much harder now then it was when I had my last one 10 years ago.
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Giirrrlllll don’t do that to yourself. I would be out too!
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You’re not wrong tell him to get a puppy.
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He wants a baby he can stay home 247 with the bub
It doesn’t make you selfish to not want more kids. I swore I was done after 4 kids too, my husband had agreed but then changed his mind after we got married. Now we have 7 and number 8 is due in a few weeks 
that was our “compromise” because he decided he wanted a big family. I still get pissed and talk shit to my husband because I’m pregnant again and we have so many kids. Don’t get me wrong I love them to death. But it can be overwhelming as shit some days.
I have 1 and that’s enough my husband keeps saying to have another but I can’t see me giving in
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I’m 38 with a 2 year old, she’s great 
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I’m 39 and doing IUI. I don’t want my daughter to be an only child. I’m a single parent, too.
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Decisions like this do not belong on Facebook. This is something you need to talk through with your husband and only your husband.
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I’m 29 with 2 and done. I want to travel when they go to college. I didn’t plan on having them early but I did and am so happy. Having a baby is literally starting all over again. Your not selfish. It’s your body and partially your choice on it
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Just discuss it with him and be honest about how you feel.
Your body your choice but never say your to old I had my 3th at 35 my 4th at 37 my 5th at 41 and my last at 44
my kids are
29, 26, 16, 14, 9 and 6 Lmao
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There is no way shape or form you’re selfish honey, you got to think of it this way in 10 years or less every one of your young ones will be gone no that would be exactly like starting over having another baby right now but that’s between you and your husband
I done I got going be 38 and I have 4 that 18 and14 and 12 and 5 year old so I with you how you feel
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No not at all…do what you want it’s your decision.
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No you’re not wrong. If he doesn’t understand that then he is selfish. Tell him to go birth it himself.
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I dont think ur wrong but i think his feelings matter too. Something u should definitely talk about. Im 36 with a 2yr and 3yr olds n i thin its easier than being 22 with a 3yr and 2yr old.
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5 or so years you could be grandparents. Wait for that…
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Definitely not selfish, pregnancy gets harder as you get older. I had my last one in my thirties it was way harder than when I had my first 2 in my twenties
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I did that!! My kids are 26…21…15 and 14. I had my 5th child 3 yrs ago when I was 40. I’m now 43. It does take a lot out of ya being older but now u have older kids to help out!! For me I wouldn’t of done things differently atleast I was able to instill in my 5th what I nvr had done with my other 4. It’s a whole new experience and a good one at that! I’m glad I had 5 kids. Good luck though!! Just make sure u chose what u want and not him.
Nope not selfish. Unless he’s offering to be pregnant for you. Also willing to do all of the child rearing. It’s your body you have every right to say no. It doesn’t matter how he feels unless you’re on board.
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I agree with you your kids are now old enough for you to start enjoying your life. It would be a no for me to.
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Nope, your body. And if you have already discussed this then he should respect your feelings and decision.
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I had my last baby at 38. I’m now about to turn 40 and I’m so tired all the time and my body hurts so so so so much. I gained alot of weight I can get down and I think I have an umbilical hernia. I also cant poop right. I love him so so much. But I’m too old. 
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No your not selfish at all
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Duck that you deserve a break! And it’s your body, your decision. Unfortunately you have to think of the health risks As well. The money, time, stress, exhaustion , pain , sleepless nights ect.
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I would not want another child after 10 years either
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I think u should talk to ur hubby about y ge wants another 1 maybe hes feeling some type of way and u 2 can work thru it together ur suppose 2 b a team
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I’ll be 38 when my last kid turns 18. There ain’t NO WAY I’d wanna restart. You aren’t selfish
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I’m 44 this year and my boys will be 25, 6, and 2 this year
So your not to old,
But it’s your body your choice.
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My neighbors had this same argument and she finally told him “I already disassembled the crib, dont make me disassemble the playpen too” and that was the end of it
Im almost 41 and the husband said he wanted to try for a boy. I told him he was out of his mind and it was an absolute no. We have a 20yr old (my step daughter) a 9yr old and a 5 yr old. After seeing how onry our 5 yr old is he finally changed his mind. Plus I aint going thru that bullshit again.
More apt for down syndrome
Get on birth control and don’t tell him. What he doesn’t know, won’t hurt him. And after a year or two tell him that your dr doesn’t recommend for you to get pregnant at your “age.” That if you do decide on another pregnancy it can result in complications. I’m currently pregnant with my 3rd baby and I am 28. I will NEVER have kids again. I want to enjoy my life. I want to travel and enjoy my grandkids when the time comes. My mom and dad had my baby brother at 41 and 47. My brother is 6 now and my parents don’t have the energy to deal with his bad behavior and tantrums. Also resulting in them not enjoying their grandchildren because they have a kid the same age. I wish you luck!
Yea, no… You’re almost free and clear I’m 43 with a 9 year old, I can’t imagine chasing around a toddler. My mom had me at 40, I constantly remind her how insane she is. Go enjoy your second wind at life lol.
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Nope not selfish at all
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Not selfish at all. There would be risks and I currently have four myself. They’re close in age and my body cannot handle anymore pregnancies. I had a bilateral salpingectomy after the last baby.
Don’t do it! It’s a trap!! You’re almost done! Don’t start over…
I have 2 boys…13 and 3…as much as I love them both and as great as the age difference is…sometimes I wish I would have had them a tad closer together…starting over when my oldest was 10 was SUPER hard
My g’ma was 46 when she had her twelfth in 1914. That last baby girl lived to be 106. None had any abnormalities or disabilities & lived well into their 90s
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You are definitely not selfish or too old! More and more women are having kids after the age of 40! I had my first at 34 and currently 39 trying for our second. If you both feel like you are ready, go for it!
No way, i have 4 and i wouldnt wanna start again after 10 years, tell him in about 5-10 years you may start getting grandbabies
Also those are tricky ages as it is, bringing in a newborn would be so hard
If you are up for it, go for it!
I had my first at 37 and my second at 40. Both perfectly healthy. 
It’s up to you!
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Just wait for grand baby’s
Nope, you’re not selfish. HE is asking you to do that when you’re literally the one doing all the work for it to happen. Do not give in.
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I have 4 and that’s plenty. Had my youngest at 40 in 2010 and felt as if I started all over even though my tubes had been tied after the 3rd. He had some issues so I don’t think you’re being selfish at all.
Tell him ok to one more under one condition…HE has to carry it
I would say no. I would also say definitely talk about it and take his perspective into consideration. Also I wonder if he helped equally with the others and if they are his bio children. That would make a difference to me.
Get a puppy in 47 have 27,24,14,9,and then a 3 year old not going to get me time till.late 50’s I have 2 granddaughters who are older than my youngest
Do what makes you happy
Why does he feel the need for another child?
I had my 1st a day before I turned 39… there may be some more health risks, ask your Doctor…but if you really don’t want to, it is your body…hope you two can come to an understanding or solution
You’re not selfish at all. Just as he wouldn’t be selfish if the roles were reversed.
Is it just about having a child? Is adoption an option?
Either way, if you don’t want more kids, you should definitely not feel pressured or obligated. Yes, it should be discussed, it’s fair to talk to him about it, try to come to the same decision together (I’m assuming this was already done but, just in case the conversation wasn’t cooperative or constructive!), but if you don’t want more children, bringing more in is not the best choice. Not always but a lot of times it can cause resentment and other negative emotions.
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He asked and you answered. If either person says no then it’s no.
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Your the one who has to carry them , so it’s your choice. You had 4 that’s plenty. And your almost 40 so enough is enough. 
I had 4 also. The REAL worry doesn’t start until they turn 18. If he could be a little patient in a few years he may have a gran baby and that is like so much better:innocent:
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Don’t do it …he will get over it
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Is it worth losing your marriage over not having another baby what if one day you change your mind and decide you do want another baby and he says it’s to late that when he wanted another baby you wouldn’t consider it that you said no just because your an old gag doesn’t mean he should give up wanting another baby maybe he misses having a baby around and going through a the first maybe he wants to have another boy or girl to see grow up but if it’s worth losing your husband and him being unhappy because you don’t want another baby then don’t be surprised if he either steps outside the marriage or leaves you all together it would would be your fault I wish I could have another but my tubes are tied and it would kill me if I got pregnant again don’t make my mistake and I’m only 35
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Explain the risks now. Things change after 35. It can be done but over 35 still has more risks
My partner was the same, I’ve one going to college (19) and one going to secondary school (12) in sept. Found out I was pregnant when I was getting tested for early menopause and lost it in August. Got the shock of our lives in January. Number 3 is now due in Sept. I’m 41:blush:
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I’m 45 and 6 months pregnant with my 3rd. I had my first at 20 and my second at 32. So I don’t think you’re too old. With that being said, 4 kids all teenagers/preteens is a lot to handle and if you don’t want another one don’t be pressured into it. It’s your body and if you feel you’re done then by all means stand your ground.
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Nobody should ever feel like they’re forced to have a child. Either sex. But 39’s not too old.
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I had my youngest at 38 there’s a ten and a have year age gap between him and his nearest sibling he was baby number five and honestly he’s one of the best things in my life, I wouldn’t change it…however I wanted to have another baby…you’re not too old but if you don’t want another child you need to make your position clear I doubt its a make or break choice I would imagine your husband is missing your kids being small you should talk to him
Tell him to wait there will be plenty of grandchildren soon enuff:rofl:
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Women take on 95% of the responsibility of having children.
It’s 100% your decision to make.
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Hell NO you are not wrong
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If I were in your shoes I would suggest getting my hubby a puppy instead cuz yall are fixing to start entering the good years where soon. It will be self sufficient grown kids and more travel and fun time for parents
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No you not being selfish and I would not want to start over
you’re allowed to say no( doesn’t matter your reasoning) You aren’t selfish or anything of the sort.
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You’re not too old and no you’re not being selfish. My husband and I have 5, he doesn’t care if we have another but I sure in the hell don’t. But it does sound like you both need to chat and he needs to hear why you don’t want anymore.
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No not selfish at all. But you all need to sit down and have a real deep convo. This is a big deal and it should not be brushed off. This could potentially end a marriage if he truly desires another child on a deep passionate level. Just be open and honest with him and see if there’s something beside a baby that can fill whatever void he may be having.
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Your not to old, but if your done you are done. Your not wrong at all, your allowed to say no if you feel you don’t want anymore kids.
I’d go get my tubes tied, cut and burnt. I did that to my husband
No, I have 11,10,8 and 2. I’d never start over again when 2 hits ten. And ten years from now I’ll be 36 it’s still a big nope! Lol
Your body, your say .
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I’m 33 and pregnant with our final baby because I couldn’t handle being pregnant any older than this. It’s absolutely not selfish. Sounds like something you should seek some couple therapy over so he can better understand your reasoning otherwise he may always resent your decisions
No no and no. Mainly because that age gap sucks big time.
My first is 28 and my last is 8. I had my last at age 40. I love him and WOULD do it all over again, but it took a toll on my body. The decision needs to be from both of you or not at all…
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I had my last at 40, but it’s your body, your choice…
My eldest son is 24 and my youngest daughter is just a year old
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U have to carry the baby.
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I have a 25, 23, 17, 9, 7 ,5, and 2 yr old. We were done after #3. Then we weren’t and started over. He doesn’t want more, I do. But we had many talks about it before I agreed not to have more. I recommend talking. If we hadn’t talked and he just said no I would have resented it. If I had ignored him he would have been resentful. Talking is key. If you aren’t comfortable with another baby let him know why. But…age doesn’t necessarily dictate if you should or not. If you want a baby at 50 then have a baby. If you don’t want a baby at 30, don’t have one!
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With the utmost kindness… I’m not sure why you’re asking everyone else… it’s your opinion that matters the most
x❤️… ?
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I’m glad my Dr said I couldn’t have anymore. my daughter is 19 now. And a 32 & 27
Sometimes I watch my grandkids they are 10 9 7 and 2 when my son n daughter need a break from them. I bring them over but then I get so exhausted from watching them too.
So if your done just tell him you can’t anymore. And you need to live your life too
Not at all. It’s your body. Your time that’s gonna be put into raising it! if you don’t want too , you have every right to say no!
If you don’t want another, you should never be forced to do something with your own body that you don’t want to do. However, my mother had me at 34 and my sister at 37. As long as it’s something you want to do and the doctor says it is safe, it’s all up to you!