My daughter was the flower girl at my brothers wedding. I didn’t agree with the marriage, they’d dated like 6 months, had only been together like 2 when he proposed. But it was important to him so I let her do it. It doesn’t take anything away from her being the flower girl at my wedding. Now she knows what to do, so it’s kind of like practice.
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Uhm I would be grateful someone wants me kid to be part of their big day?
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Uh he’s little probably won’t make it down the whole way anyway and if she wants your kiddo to be apart of the day I dont see the problem. My cousin got married years ago and her and I weren’t talking. She had our other cousin ask if my daughter could be her flower girl I said yes because that’s what you do.
Sounds like you’re in no position to judge someone’s elses relationship… For starters. Lol
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Your kid will thank you for the memories made… not. 
Think of it as practice for your wedding!
Yes, yes you sound selfish, and quite immature.
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Answer to your question: Yes.
Why can’t he be in both weddings:joy:
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I cant understand this… your sons aunt wants him in her wedding. I think thats ADORABLE.
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What happened to sisters loving their sisters and supporting their big day just as much as your own? Regardless of how long she’s been with the man that’s your sister at the end of the day, she loves your child enough to include him and that’s soo sweet. Imagine when your sons older you get to tell him he was chose as a ring bearer TWICE! I never had a role in a wedding and I remember when I was younger I always wanted to be someone’s flower girl.
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Let your son do it because then you can have your kid do something more like a best man for your future husband
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You are being very selfish and sound extremely bitter! Wow!
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I don’t think it would hurt. I’d be honored
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I’m just wondering because of how you worded that. When you say “has really changed her morals for this guy” Are you saying that because of the quick engagement and court house wedding? If so, I’m just wondering what either of those things has to do with morals?
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You should be happy she wants your son to be part of her big day.No matters what is going on between her and man, it is her choice.
So please, don’t bring stress for no reason.
Also, being a ring bearer once will not hurt if if does it for you as well.
To answer your actual question… YES you are wrong.
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What’s the big deal?
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You sound a little jealous. Maybe I’m reading it wrong. You say its because you want him in your wedding first, but then you go on to basically say “well she already went to the courthouse, she’s moved her morals, she moved too fast…” It is HER choice to marry him. I’m not bashing you, he’s YOUR child so whatever you decide should be respected no matter what. To say you don’t want your child involved “in something like that” ?? sorta sounds like an excuse.
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I can understand if you say no because you don’t agree with her marrying this guy and you’re protesting the wedding (and not going yourself.) But if it’s just because you want him in your wedding first, then it does sound petty.
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Your kid. You do what YOU want. Just tell her no.
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Nope I would feel the same way 
You need to realize that not everyone does things by the book and you shouldn’t judge your sister for only knowing him 4 months, so they might be together forever. And yes you should let your son be their ring bearer. He can be JR best man in yours. My sister had her son get a ring in the ceremony too , they had him 2 years before they got married. I feel like there’s better ways you can incorporate your son into your own wedding
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I would consider that an honor, and would be ecstatic. And how long she had known the man before getting engaged and so on does not matter, and is not a valid reason to not let him be the ring bearer so that part could have been left out of the post. And “I want him to be in my wedding first” sounds very petty and childish. I say, yes that you are wrong and honestly? Grow up. Y’all are sisters.
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that’s his auntie … let him !!!
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Sounds like jealousy to me sis. 
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You are mom, you can do whatever you feel is right. There’s way too many people in this world who think they can go above how the mom feels and that’s not right.
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Idk why you guys are attacking her. For one it’s HER kid. I dont think it’s selfish at all. She has been planning her wedding and wants HER son to be in his first wedding at HER wedding. There is nothing wrong with saying no to her sister over that at all. I would be upset too and explain. Im sure they know others that can do it. It’s her kid. Not her sisters. Y’all need to quit being so narrowed minded. I see exactly why she’s upset. And they post on here for advice. Not for a bunch of hormonal judgemental women to bash them. Unbelievable with these comments.
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Your life…and it’s "no"vember!
Lindsey Moore could you imagine if I said Skye couldn’t be in your wedding cause I wanted her in mine first lawd .
You sound petty and jealous! And what does “something like that” even mean! That’s her husband and her business, you don’t have to like it or agree with it but you should be supportive! This could be the trial run for your son for your own wedding. After all he is only 18 months old so I wouldn’t expect things to go as planned anyways. Stop being hateful and let him be a part of his Aunts big day. 
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Nah. I would do the same thing. I was gonna write a paragraph as to why, but message me if you want my reasoning
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Yes, you’re selfish & petty… Be grateful she’s asked for your son. You stated about her morals really, it doesn’t matter how long she’s known this guy. The fact that she’s happy & asked for your son should be blessing of 2 families coming together. Not for you as her sister to speak of her morals; when we all aren’t perfect including yourself. Stop being petty about the smallest things in life.
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Morals? You had a baby before marriage. Sounds petty to me. I would be excited for my sister if she were happy and the guy treated her amazingly well.
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My brother & sister and law ask the same thing , my now husband ( married in a court house having real wedding july 2020) and I said no because our children will be in our wedding first because its something special to us .
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I get what your saying… Your saying that from the way things are happening you don’t think the marriage is gonna last so you don’t want your son to be the ring bearer for the first time at a wedding that’s not gonna last. You would rather have him do it first at yours because you feel that it’s gonna last. And your not wrong… There are plenty of other options for a ring bearer for her wedding. He is YOUR joy. You can share him if you want and you don’t have to if you don’t want to. Everyone else on here is crazy to think you should have to share your kid with other people like that. Of course you want your day to be as special as it can with your whole family and I do think it takes away from it by having him be in her wedding first.
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I personally wouldn’t let my kids be involved in someone else’s wedding. That’s a special thing for you at your wedding.
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It’s not even that serious
My kids were in my brothers wedding before mine…it was fine
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The kid is 18 months old. He isn’t going to remember her wedding or yours. It isn’t special for him. It will still be special for you for him to be in your wedding. Seriously this sounds like the virginity argument. Just because you aren’t his first doesn’t mean you aren’t special:open_hands:
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Just let him do it its good practice for him for yours. Yes it does sound selfish of you to do this.
YOUR kid, YOUR decision. Simple as that? 
He is your child, you have every right to say no!!! Whatever your reason is! Anyone who says differently is wrong! Not to mention I dont know why you would want a child this young! They are so unpredictable! I have seen many children throw tantrums and be cranky!
OMG at 18 months by then maybe two I don’t even think he hardly knows how to walk nevermind go down and carry something on a pillow and I know for a fact that job one of my grandsons was only just turned two at my son and and daughter-in-law’s wedding and that was hard enough cuz they don’t know what to do and they just in our name a cry you know and take away from the whole wedding so don’t have a ring bearer or find somebody that’s a little older
Yeah you sound jealous and petty to me. You should feel honored that she wants her nephew involved in her wedding so bad. Not only that but its your sister and her special day, why wouldnt you want to oblige? Its not going to hurt anyone in any way, shape or form, nor will it take away from him being the ring bearer at your wedding. If anything your sisters wedding is the practice round for him. By the time your wedding comes he’ll be a ring bearing pro.
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Sounds very petty…
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If you dont want your son in the wedding just say no. 18 months is to young to expect him to carry out the duties. And you are having your wedding. No ,sorry get a 3 or 5 year old .cute but more able to do the job.
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Sounds petty af. Lol. Just cause he would be in her wedding doesnt mean he cant be part of yours anymore. Plus most people would be happy that their kids are wanted to be part of it and involved. Sounds more like a “me first thing” then a problem with her wanting him in the wedding.
Also, you have an 18 month ol baby from a previous relationship and your engaged. So you shouldnt be judging that its “to soon” for her when your moving pretty quick yourself.
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I had a similar problem. Me and my husband wanted my step daughter to be bridesmaid at our wedding and her mum said no at first because she wanted her to be bridesmaid for her first when she eventually got married. Most ridiculous thing I have ever heard. She also wouldnt let her be flower girl to my brother in law for the same reason. With a lot of arguments, mediation and eventually court. She was a bridesmaid at our wedding. She always talks about it and I’m so happy she could be there. I am still upset that her mother wouldnt allow her to come to the reception. But at least she was there for the wedding. I would say let him be ring bearer they probably thought youd be pleased if they asked him to do that.
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I would
That’s your sister!
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I got engaged after 3 months and married in a court house(we have been married for 8 years ) because of judgmental people I think your judging them based on that… with that being said it is YOUR child and if you don’t feel comfortable then that’s that and your family needs to accept that
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Childish I’d let him and feel honored that she asked
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Wow… how selfish, petty and jealous! Your sister wants your child to be a part of her special day and you want to decline because you think he she puked be in your wedding first??? GROW UP!
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Yes it is selfish lol shouldnt matter, it’s your sister and her special day. What does it take away from yours if he does both and why does which order he does it matter? Sorry seems pretty petty to me. Also what does it matter how long they have known each other or if they eloped and are now doing something big. I’m so glad I would never judge my sister the way you are judging yours so harshly. You should be proud she wants her nephew in her wedding party, she clearly loves him very much because that’s an honor.
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Your child your choice.
Don’t worry. If it’s like most kids that small they won’t do what you want them to any way. . Small kids almost always mess up and still the show. I was at one where he got down and crawled out of the church. That is what you remember about that wedding
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Not selfish, just jealous and petty.
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Are you in the wedding?
It’s your sister! Stop being selfish
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Do NOT feel pressured to do something you’re not comfortable doing. He’s your child not hers. He’s still very young and we know how that turns out sometimes. Be honest with your sister and reinforce your feelings.
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Lol wow jealous much? this is so childish and petty
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I don’t see the problem in him being in your sister’s wedding. It isnt every day a wedding happens or you get asked to participate in any way. I agree with others that this post sounds a little petty. It is very hard to get on when a sister is petty.
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Why does it matter whos wedding he is in first? Thats ridiculous.
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I’d let him be in the wedding.
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Def childish … you think hes gonna remember? No. So who cares … but your kid, whatever.
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Petty petty petty. Get over yourself.
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It’s not just someone’s wedding. It her sister. Just as the mom has a connection with her child the sister probably has the same connection. It’s something special to her too. Anyways the person that posted does seems like they are jealous. Like why would she doom her own sisters wedding from the beginning… that’s so sad. So much negativity.
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are you serious?!
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Let him practice at hers so he’ll know what to do at yours
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He will likely run crazy anyway
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Ultimately, he is your baby and it’s your decision. With that being said, I think it’s great that you have family that want to involve each other in things! I thinks it’s a little unfair for you to assume that their marriage won’t last. You truly do not know that. You should be more positive and pray it does last for her. I understand you wanting him in your wedding first. It would not really matter to me about who’s wedding he is in first. This is just all my opinion tho.
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I feel like he could play a more important special role than that at your wedding? Like you could make something special just for him or he could be your fiance’s best man or he could walk with you down the isle or something like that. It’s up to you at the end of the day and you feel how you feel. But I dunno it could be special to have him be a part of your sister’s wedding.
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Think of it as a rehearsal for your wedding
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Sounds like you’re jealous that her wedding is before yours and that her wedding might take the attention off of yours… Family is family… And no one knows if her marriage will work out just like nobody knows if your marriage will work out. Sounds a little like you want to have some control over something… Like your son because you have no control over her getting married.
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What option will bring the most joy to this child?
Soooo your judging her for being quick in a relationship…yet u have an 18 month old from a previous relationship and are getting married too…
Pot calling the kettle black
“Me first” says it all…
You wanna keep up with the Jones’…grow up woman!!!
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Let him practice and get it right at her wedding then he’ll be perfect at yours.
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Childish why can’t he be in both weddings?
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Well obviously her “morals” are better than yours since you have a kid already 
it’s so obvious you’re jealous of your sister so get your kid out of that wedding plan ASAP
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That’s petty of you. Let him be her ring bearer
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Selfish mom you are he is only little for such a short time enjoy it.
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If you don’t want your son to be in the Wedding your family should respect that decision.
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Why can’t he be in both? That’s weird
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I think it’s normal to want stuff like this but you should really be grateful she wants him involved and remember his relationships have nothing to do with you.
It’s normal to want him to be in your wedding first, totally! But actually saying no because of it? Yes that would be childish
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People are so petty. Grow up! Why ruin your sisters wedding? You should be honored she wants your son to do it
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Wow… my son was born a few weeks after my sisters wedding (unplanned) but when we weren’t sure how far along I was, she straight away planned for the baby to be in the wedding! Love my sister and it would have been my pleasure!
What’s your sisters relationship like with your son? If she has nothing to do with him fair point, but if not I dont see the issue 
I’d be offended if my sister got married and didnt choice my son to be a part of it!
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More practice for him. That’s just wrong to be so petty. If your sister is happy you should be too. Seems childish.
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What. So your seriously going to judge your sister and her relationship AND take offense to her wanting your child to be in her special day. All she was doing was wanting someone who is special to her to be in her special day. So what if they only knew eachother for 4 months. I was engaged to my husband in 1 we were pregnant in 2. Been together 4 years and our strength has never wavered. You need to do some serious lookin into your heart sweetie. Your sister is literally a best friend for life that shares your blood.
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You’re being selfish.
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Stop being petty Betty and let the kid be part of the wedding. You should be happy for your sister and honored she wants him to be part of the wedding. You just seem jealous she beat you to it
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quit being jealous of your sister and using your son as a tool to complicate her life. Be happy for her and hope it works out, let your son be ring bearer for both weddings.
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Petty as fuck 
you sound very jealous.
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It’s your choice, but sounds like you are just jealous. 🤷
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Jesus lol it’s a fucking wedding, shes not asking him to be freaking sacrificed. Actually. No. Dont let him…teach her a lesson…her nephew cant be part of her special day because his mom is a jealous control freak who doesnt want her son doing anything special with his aunt. God, some people just need to chill tf out.
I would do it in a heartbeat for my sibling. Sounds a little selfish on your part.
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What a honor that she wants him in her wedding, I sure hope you let him
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Wow. He would probably love to do it
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Jealousy and very childish. Grow up and if your sister is happy, then be happy for her! Your decision but I’d be honored if my child were in my sisters wedding, and you should be too!
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Let him do it. It’s for her this time. Next time it will be for you. Look at it as practice 
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Ummm tf I just read?
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