This can’t be a serious question? Are you freaking serious!! That is your daughter who cares who is going to be there or not be there. She needs your support & encouragement on a huge day she has worked so hard for. Put your selfish but in check, be an adult & for the love of God be there for your daughter!!!
YOU DONT HAVE TO SIT WITH HIM OR SEE HIM as long as she sees you there it’s not her fault you guys can’t be civil for her special day . Just sit on one side far far away from him is all .and find out her plans after sonu can leave asap or his plans sonhe can leave …don’t ruin it for her I didn’t go to my son’s graduation and I dearly regret it …and he never ever forgets cause that was special.for him.
That is likely anxiety talking. You can mentally build someone up to be more powerful in your mind. In reality they have no power over you… you need to show up for her. You don’t have to even look In his direction, but you need to show up for her. She needs you and your love and support.
Absolutely. You are being petty for this. That is the girl YOU raised. You don’t have to sit next to him or bear him and you do not have to have any contact with him. Your acting like a high school student.
I think you’re being childish.you can’t control how he behaves, but you can certainly control your reaction. You don’t have to sit by him or speak to him, so go for your daughter and don’t worry about him or what he does. Why miss an important event for your daughter bc of someone else. Makes no sense. Be an adult, grow up and don’t bring your daughter into yalls mess and toxic relationship. Let her enjoy her day. Don’t make Her Day about YOU
I am not going to tell you to get over it bla bla however you absolutely must be at her graduation, hands down , point blank. Ignore him , you dont even need to talk or socialize with him . It’s fine to bow out of any after celebration he will be at but you must be there at her day .
Yes, it will make you a bad mother. You and her father made her. So suck it up and get to that graduation! It only happens once. You don’t have to sit together or even speak to each other. But for 1 night that only happens once in her life stop being selfish. Put your big mama panties on go be with your daughter.
This graduation day is set aside FOR HER, not for you or her father to squabble. Don’t make it about you both. This kind of day will be remembered forever, so make it a great and wonderful day just for her w/o worries or embarrassment from both parents. Focus on her, not on her father…
You know
Your job in this lifetime of being a parent was to decide what kind of mother you were going to be
Not your job to decide what kind of father he is going to be Of course, you should be at your daughter’s graduation. It would be selfish of you as a mother not to be.
This day is all about her and her accomplishments not about you as a mother, or he has a father 
Positive Energy
Listen, my dad skipped my baby shower because he didn’t get along with my mom and her husband. It hurt me but I understood. He then passed two months after my daughter was born. Go to the graduation. It’s about your daughter, not him. You don’t have to sit together.
By not attending you’re not hurting him, you’re hurting her. And she will resent you for it. There are 2 sides to every venue — sit on extreme opposit side he’s on.
You are wrong. Put your differences aside for your daughter. He may not even show up. You don’t have to sit near each other or talk to each other. Do not miss this special day for your daughter. Besides most of the time you only get a certain amount of tickets so she just doesn’t have to give him a ticket
I’m with the rest of the moms I hope this is NOT what she’s seriously trying to do. Your daughter can’t choose who would be her parents?! He left y’all when y’all needed him most and now you’re trying to do the same to your daughter. If you have to ask I think you know the answer. Hope you showed up at her day because if not. You’re looking to be not invited to the rest of her other important days in her life.
If you want to be there so bad you’d put her feelings before your own and get the hell over yourself. My daughter’s father is absent and has other kids he’s absent for but if my daughter wanted him there id suck up my own feelings FOR MY CHILD. If you’re not going to because of him don’t cry about it you’ve made that choice deal with it.
You need to put your feelings aside and be there for your daughter. Do NOT make it about you.
My parents hate each other and both had new partners. When I graduated they put their feelings aside and were there to support me. They didn’t even have to look at each other let alone talk. It was awesome that they were there and acted like grown ups
Yes you’re in the wrong.even if he shows up, you don’t have to sit beside him. It will break your daughters heart that you wouldn’t show up to walk her get her diploma and walk the stage. You’re both her parents regardless of who’s been there the most and if she wants both y’all then y’all should both be there for her. she will remember who showed up and even if she understands why you didn’t show up, she may still hold done resentment.
There’s no way this is a real person asking this. You, as her MOTHER, should know that YES , you not being at your daughters graduation because you can’t stand her father is the absolute wrong choice. Stand on the opposite side of the room, don’t look in his direction and show up for your kid.
If you absolutely cannot be in the same room as him make sure she is fully supported before and after graduation. Help her get ready, drive her there, etc. Is there a way you can go and sit no where close to her father? Maybe talk with the school if they give tickets close together, or maybe ask the school if you can be behind the scenes with her.
I would never ever miss any event for any of my kids no matter the situation. There’s nothing and no one that could stop me.
The place your daughter is graduating at will more than likely be huge. There will be soooo many people there, that the odds of even running into him aren’t very high. If you go to talk to your daughter, do a quick scan of the room first and make sure he’s not near. You’re both adults for freak sake. Your child should always come before YOUR feelings. God. This is why I don’t want to get divorced. The chances of a divorce between two people being pleasant and supportive is as rare as a flipping unicorn. Ugh. Grow up.
Wow. Speechless…your poor daughter. Shame on you if you’d seriously consider missing such a milestone and also a once in a lifetime event SHE may want both her parents there for. It’s not about you!
My mom hated my father guts, he acted the exact same way your baby daddy has, but guess what? They both put their shit aside and both attended my graduation. You both need to start acting like responsible grown ups and be there to support your daughter. If you don’t go you are only hurting her, so please put the pettiness aside for her and go.
Selfish
Do Not rain on her parade because of issues between yourself and dad. Plenty of other places to sit!! Grow up!
You knew it was wrong when you posted this! I could not imagine not going to my daughter’s graduation over ill differences with her dad.
My daughter’s dad walked out on us when she was 3. Was hardly around ever, he hurt her beyond words but he still came to her graduation. We made the best of it and still had a great time celebrating her accomplishments. Did I wanna puke on him? Yeah, but I held it in.
This is about your daughter not you or her dad. You either want to be there for her or not. Keep in mind your decision may affect the future relationship you have with her.
You’re wrong. Put the hatred aside and go to the graduation this is for your daughter. You don’t need to sit next to him to go. You dont need to look at him, talk to him, or breathe the same air.
Very very very immature!!!
You are definitely wrong, and hurting your daughter. Unless he raped you, you must have liked him long enough to let him impregnate you.
NOBODY could stand in the way of me attending my daughter’s graduation especially HIM. This is a special day that you won’t get to see again. Be there ! If you have helped her get to this day grin and bear it and don’t let anybody steal your joy !!
So he wins! For the sake of your daughter you should be there as well.You don’t have to sit with him. Be the bigger person and do this for your daughter. Hate to see you regret it some day!
This is your daughter’s day u should.be there. Do it for her she deserves and actually u do too. If u don’t he wins
Utterly unacceptable that your daughter’s special occasion doesn’t trump your ill feelings for your daughter’s father. If you truly want to be there, then you show up and grow up.
That is a big day…an important milestone in your child’s life…GO! She will only remember that her parents couldn’t be adults long enough for her to have the special day that she deserves and has worked hard for. Put it aside and go support and celebrate your child
You guys are ruining one of the most important moments in her life!! WT HECK IS wrong with you guys!!
You are disgustingly wrong. I would be heart broken if my mom didn’t come to my graduation. So what are you going to do if she ever gets married and has children? You going to skip her wedding? Skip the birth of her kids? Not go to your grandkids school functions, T-ball games etc? Are you going to miss out on everyone’s lives because you want to be a child? Grow up and don’t let anyone stop you from being present for your child.
Yes you are wrong. She will never forgive you if you don’t go. Sit on the other side where your not near him. Gesh!
You will always be placed in a situation where someone or something will not sit right with you! I have attended many occasions like that . As for a child particulary they are apart of you choose your way how you will do it, perhaps bring someone else along, your friend… it seems that still things are stuck with you that are traumatic and hard to overcome, its always going to poke you until you work on that fear! I wish you all harmony
I say put your big girl panties on and do what you should to support your daughter regardless of your feelings towards him. You don’t have have to speak to him or go near him. Go ahead and let him make a scene if he wants. Ignore him and be an adult. He’s the one gonna be looking like an idiot at the end of the day for that. Not you.
Hurting YOU? The only one who will be hurt is your DAUGHTER. Go and support her! Don’t sit next to your ex and don’t speak to him if you two can’t put aside your own BS to be there for your own daughter. It isn’t about either one of you!
Wow yes your in the wrong. Depaite your feelings towards her father he is half of her genetics. And if your unwilling to out your own emotions aside for her graduation which she will remember forever. Are you also going to miss her wedding? Future birthdays? Birth of grandchildren or anything else that comes up. I mean come on.
That’s your daughter’s graduation. He has nothing to do with the graduation. She needs to know both parents love her and can put aside reasoning for not liking eachother
You definitely CAN NOT miss your daughters graduation.It’s not like you have to be sitting next To him.If you don’t go later on you might regret it
Don’t be childish and you’ll regret not going to your babies graduation! F him don’t even look at him don’t even be close to him don’t even look for him!
smile And cheer your baby on!! My kid is my kid (I only have one) And I try not to miss any milestones that she might have! Bye. You’re childish asf
May I add: I always wanted my daughters father to be there. He chose not to Ans I know that hurts my daughter. (10) he’s never been there not even to any doctors appointment since she was born. That sucks! Kids want both parents there. Do it for them not for your selfish feelings!
If you choose to miss it because he will be there I think you will one day regret it. This is one of the most important days of her life and if she wants both you and her father there for her then you both need to put your issues aside for her. They only graduate high school once, you won’t get this opportunity again. Just do it for her.
How petty,it’s not about you and him it’s about her and her biggest achievement so far,you don’t have to sit next to him,I know the feeling of disliking someone and not wanting anything to do with them,so stop being so petty,the only person your hurting is your daughter….period
Put your daughter first- not your emotions! She will have ONE graduation!! Don’t let your hate ruin this for her.
The day isn’t about you and your feelings. You do whatever you have to do to make your girl feel special. Sit in different sections arrive early so you don’t have to walk in together, but you be there for her.
If u wanna be there for her, BE. THERE. FOR. HER!!! Smh! It’s not about putting differences aside. It also has nothing to do with him. If he shows up, cool, but u HAVE TO BE THERE!!! Y’all ain’t gotta sit together or talk or even interact. U can ignore him, but U CANT miss ur daughter’s graduation. That would be terrible for her to look into the audience and the person who’s taken care of her and made sure she has everything in life not to be there for her. CONTINUE with what you’ve committed to, and that’s being an amazing parent to ur child! This is her day and it’s not about anybody else nor their feelings, including urs!!!
BE
THERE
FOR
YOUR
BABY!!!
U can’t explain this away…just be there!!!
Dont go, she will resent you, hope you can live with that guilt
As an adult we have to do the hard stuff. That means setting aside our rage,anger and such. You not going looks poorly on you no matter the circumstances and your daughter will remember that forever. So ask yourself if thats worth it and can you live with that.
It’s not like you have to sit next to him…are you going to miss your daughters wedding too? What about her 1st child…wow you are setting a great example for her. I am sorry but the way you presented it…not too sure if it is him that would cause the scene
You have to love her more than you hate him. It’s over, let it go, and move on. Not being present to such a momentous occasion for such a juvenile reason will forever be remembered negatively.
Im gonna apologize now because this is borderline rant, but i have been in HER shoes before and can say if you really feel this way Your making her suffer because of your personal dislike of her father. She will remember that and possibly even resent your inability to suck up your own feelings for what an hr maybe 2 and sit on the opposing side of a room or stadium from him, and be there for HER! that is a day about HER not you, not him, but HER. I still cherish the fact my brother and mom put their differences aside for my graduation and both showed up for me. That small act alone proves that no matter what youll be there. And whos to say he will actually show up that what if NEITHER of you are there how heartbroken would that make her.
Plus what ya gonna do about wedding day, birth of grandchildren on on the list continues! It’s time to put it behind you! Forgive him for yourself! Through it in the fire hunny! He ain’t worth missing everything over especially since you listed all them things he never helped with or was there for so he mY be doing it in spite! And that is to be sure you suffer more!! No! No! No!
Yes you are wrong. It’s not about you! It’s your daughters day!
Put your pettiness and anger aside and go! It’s not your daughter’s fault that you have issues with her dad. This is her graduation… You both should be there.
I don’t particularly care about being around my oldest father but I put aside my feelings for my child. Just because he’s there doesn’t mean you have to sit next to him. It’s for your daughter.
You are definitely in the wrong. Maybe she wants him to be there to see that she did it without him. Maybe she just wants her Dad to be proud of her. Maybe she wants her parents to celebrate HER! Regardless she didn’t choose either of you to be her parents, y’all chose one another. So, put your pettiness aside and go support your daughter. Don’t even mention this to her! Sit in a difference area if need be but, be there HAPPILY FOR HER!
Unless you have assigned seats, you don’t have to go near or see him, and if you do run into him you don’t have to speak to him. I can assure you as someone whose mother missed her prom, if you miss something as major as her graduation she will resent you for it forever. I don’t care what the circumstances are there’s nothing in this world aside from death that could or would keep me from watching them through there first biggest accomplishment in life. It would be super sad and totally on you if you can’t set your feelings aside for a few hours for her. This is her day, not yours. This is her accomplishment, not yours so you don’t get to tell her who she can have there or not and you sure as hell don’t have the right to make her choose between which 2 parents she wants to attend if she wants both there to watch HER accomplishment. If your that petty you really don’t deserve to be there anyway.
I didn’t even read the rest besides the headline. Yes, it’s wrong! Go and be an adult and let her split her moments with you. This is one of the few times you need to set yourself aside!
Trust me, if you don’t go your daughter will never forget this. It’ll linger and nag her thoughts throughout her life. Get over yourself(yes I know that’s harsh). Just do it and go.
Grow up! Are you okay with sabotaging the relationship with your daughter bc you don’t want to see him?!? Sit away from him and don’t look his way, it’s that simple.
I didn’t even need to finish reading this because no matter what this is your child you should definitely be there. I would never speak to any parent of mine that couldn’t put there own feelings aside to go to a special day like that. Grow up. So you’ll miss her wedding, birth of a baby etc because you don’t care how your child feels just how you feel about her dad. Guess what you picked him. So now it’s time to do what best for the child and not yourself. A child should have ever right to be involved with both parents if they choice and shouldn’t have ever felt the pressure of if 1 parent goes another won’t. FFS my parents tried this crap. I bitched them both out told them to grown up and do what was best for my sister and brother Guess what they did. They were even able to get a picture of them in there cap and gown with both parents. That’s a memory they will always have. Since then they share grandchildren. So birthday parties etc. If they don’t have anything nice to say then say nothing. No child should be put in the middle of there parents drama. Sorry touchy subject for me. Lol
Why can’t you go and just avoid him? If you see him just turn away. I’m sure your daughter would be heartbroken if you chose to not go. Graduation is huge for kids these days. Some day You will regret not going and watching her walk across the stage.
Honestly, you are wrong for not going to her graduation. It’s about your daughter, not him. And it will honestly really negatively affect your relationship with her if you don’t go to the most important day in her life (thus far). Just be the bigger person and ignore him, let him make a fool out of himself if he wants to. But he has just as much of a right to her as you do, AND she is old enough to make the choice to have her dad in her life, whether you like it or not. Not meaning to sound rude, but y’know.
Wrong for not going. There are so many people at a graduation, just sit on the other side of the room. Show up for your child! This is a huge accomplishment for her. Let all that other stuff go. It’s not worth it. She deserves both of you. Let her form her own opinion and deal with the man you chose to be her dad! Otherwise, she may resent you in the end. Just my thoughts from what I’ve seen others do and what happened to their relationship with their child for not letting go and having a friendly relationship with their other parent. It usually backfires! And by the way, I raised my daughter by myself and her dad was at her graduation. I let all the bs between us go because my daughter deserved better. She deserved to have both parents regardless of what he did or didn’t do. In the end, I have a wonderful child who now sees the whole picture, but knows how to deal with it herself. She graduated high school and now she is graduating college and her dad will be there again, regardless. Because if she wants her dad there, she should have him there. This is about her not us as parents. Also, I wouldn’t and have never (except a science fair when I was super sick and couldn’t get out of bed) missed a day to recognize my child for her accomplishments! Who cares if he has made it to one or none, she sees who comes to support everytime! Her mama! Go to the graduation, stay away from him, you will not regret it and your relationship with your daughter will grow stronger!
Yes your wrong. You child worked hard to get to this point in her life. And if you were there the whole time it’s your accomplishment too. I don’t care how much you hate him. It’s how much you love her. Nobody says you have to sit next to him.
Definitely go to her graduation, you have been there and seen her through everything, don’t miss out on this beautiful stepping stone in her life. Never let another adult control your emotions so much that it causes you to not be there for her.
A real mother would go support her child no matter what. Grow up. I feel bad for your daughter, got 2 immature parents
Get over yourself. It’s not about you, it’s about her. If you don’t go, you’ll regret it and she’ll resent you. This is a life milestone.
You should put on your big girl boots and go to the graduation and celebrate your daughter’s achievement.
No one is asking you to marry, kiss, sit with or look at your ex. Quit making it about you and focus on celebrating your daughter.
Yes you are wrong. You don’t have to be by him or see him. This is about her and what she wants. Show her you are always in her corner no matter what. He may not even show up if he is as unreliable as you say. But not showing up will do so much harm to your relationship with her.
Does she want her father to be there? Because if she wants him to be there then you can’t say anything. She wants both of her parents there, sit on the far end of the hall or wherever the graduation is taking place and ignore him. It’s petty to miss your daughter’s graduation just because you can’t stand her father. You chose him. Live with it. He is her father wether you like it or not.
You’ll never get this moment back if you decide not to go I would never do this to my kids no matter what I really really hope you dont regret your decision
Yes you are wrong. It’s not about him. It’s about your child and you don’t have to get near your ex, speak to him, nothing. I felt that way about my kids’ Dad but I just stayed away from him. Even when our 2 oldest got married. It’s not about you and him, it’s about the child you have together.
Yes it is wrong of to not go! O am 32 and this is how my dad is. He refuses to be anywhere my mom is and it pisses me off! He misses so much of my kids life because of this and he even refused to come to my wedding! My cousin that was more of a father figure walked me down the isle… Its sad that the kids suffer because parents can’t put their kids first! No matter how much I hated their dad (I’m happily married to my kids father) I would NEVER miss out on anything because of it. Even if I had to come home and cry my eyes out due to the interaction I would not miss a thing! Its called being an adult! Ugh!
There’s no way I’d let anything stand between me & watching my child graduate which is a once in a lifetime thing for her. You can avoid him. You don’t have to be near him.
This is about supporting your daughter. From what it sounds like he is unreliable in her life so he might not even show up to the graduation. You should go for your daughter’s sake and if he happens to show up just don’t sit near him.
Go but don’t talk to him. I have a parent who missed my graduation and wedding. It makes me depressed at times that this parent missed out on so much. Hasn’t physically seen my oldest daughter who is 5.
Yes your wrong. 100% without a doubt wrong. You need to let the past be the past. She only graduates once.
I don’t give a fuck if my toxic ass family, I can’t stand to even think about, let alone have panick attacks when I see any of them around town showed up at my kids graduation. Even though I haven’t spoken to them in YEARS, I’d sit next to any one of them with a smile. There is 0 excuses.
That’s your baby, this is her big day. It has 0 to do with you or him.
Grow up its a graduation…sit somewhere far away from him, dont even look for him . U sound very bitter…all be it some of it very earned but still carrying that bitterness around in life must be exhausting. Let it go and live ur life…stop worrying about a man …one u say u don’t care about
No disrespect but you’re an adult for pete sakes! Miss your kid’s graduation because you can’t deal it absolutely ridiculous. Hurting you? Can you imagine the hurt you’re putting your daughter through? The hurt of you can’t grow up for an important time in her life. You don’t deserve to be there if you can woman up.
Be there. You deserve to see her graduate more than being angry with him. 911 if he begins his bs and you can’t get away. You don’t have to sit together.
You will deeply regret missing such an important event for bitterness. I can’t imagine going through what you did, but I’ll be damned if that means me not being there for my babies. Sit away from them and enjoy your daughters graduation.
Who’s the child here?? You or your daughter?? You would be so childish as to miss your own daughter’s graduation because her dad showed up!! Seriously!!! Your just as bad as the father that’s been absent for years!! When both of my girls graduated THEY chose who to give their tickets to!! I also disposed my child’s father. We both went. My parents sat between us. Everyone that se wanted there was there because it was HER day!! It’s called being an ADULT!
Don’t disrespect your daughters accomplishment by not attending her graduation. Stay as far away from her dad as you can and ignore anything he might say
Yall can sit in different places. I would not miss that for anyone or anything. You don’t go he wins again!! Don’t let that happen! Plus your hurt her! And that’s not fair!! F him!!
Why can’t the girl talk to her father and tell him that he has to behave himself or he’ll have to leave because Momma was the top priority
Grow up girl
Yes you should go. This is a special time in your daughter’s life. That would be selfish of you not to go!
Go to your kid’s graduation quit holding such anger towards another person you’re wasting your energy
You need to grow up and put your differences with him to the side. Her graduation is a special time in her life, and it only happens once. That is her day, not yours, nor her father’s.
Yes. Very wrong not to go. If he tries to start something simply ignore it and be the bigger person and walk away. It makes me super sad for your child that u would even consider not going.
That’s still wrong that is your child put your damn differences aside for one day
Not much of a mother if you allow you personal feelings to affect your daughter’s happiness. Maybe her father is the one who loves her enough to be present for a special day. I think if you are looking for sympathy, you have probably come to the wrong place.
It’s your daughter’s graduation! Don’t spoil it for her sake. You can be seated far away from.youe ex and just ignore him. (Your ex does sounds like a jerk but let your daughter figure that out on her own.)
Yes. You are 100% wrong. This is not about you. This is about your daughter. Put her first and be a grown up. If you’ve been the one supporting her all these years, why would you not want to be there for one of the most important days of her life?!
You say it’s hurting you because you want to be there. I’m sorry but if you wanted to you would. You can go and just not get around him. Stay away from him and walk away if he approaches
My oldest daughter graduated and her father was invited and came. He was never really around but it is such a HUGE milestone in her life, of course he should be there!! And why would you allow other people stop you from missing your baby’s big day? You not gonna go to her wedding if he’s walking her down the isle?? Seriously smh.
That’s your daughter go to her graduation she’s worked hard for it don’t worry about him, you did it all
I have never heard anything so selfish in my damn life. Wow. I’ll let everyone else give you advice, I literally have no words.