Yeah, sure, he may be able to handle it. But isn’t co-parenting about doing what’s best for the children regardless of the parents feelings - really. My step-daughter went back to her mothers for the night when hers started. Sometimes a girl just needs her mumma. What’s so wrong about that? Controlling her will do more harm than good, she will always, ALWAYS, remember her first period as being a negative thing.
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What? Why? Why would you get it? It’s her Father he can handle it. He’s going to be around her many times when she’s on her period or gets it.
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I would go no matter what … what kind of a dad does that? Shame on him 
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Maybe he just loves his daughter to pieces and teaching her at an early age u don’t have to be embarrassed around guys when u got yo period good life lesson 
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That’s ridiculous. I’m all for respecting parents individual time with their children, however, if she was supposed to be in school during that time frame, than how are you infringing on his time? She wasn’t going to be with him either way. Would it have killed him for you to spend the day with her? Especially at such a pivotal moment in her development. Furthermore, if the school was making the decision to send her home for whatever reason, aren’t they supposed to release the child to whichever parent is available? That’s how it was when I was growing up anyway. The more I read posts like these, the more I appreciate my parent’s and their co-parenting.
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Idk if your allowed in the school but ask for school nurse to check on her. To stop any conflict just wait . Be there when she gets home and have your female talk with her. Tell her to call you with any female issues she may have
.we can’t always be there in person but plenty of other ways to communicate
Tell dad to pick up the pads
I mean if it’s a court order, what can you do. He’s a parent, why wouldn’t he find a way to suit her needs like any other parent?
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I would go get her… my ex and I don’t get along very well - But he knows better than to tell me what I’m going to do when it comes to things like that because I’m not going to listen to him anyways but it really is about the kids. If you guys were together it would be no question about whether or not you could be there when you were who she asked for. He needs to put your relationship aside and think about his daughter. She’s going to get older, resent him and chose exactly where she is and who she’s with. He needs to think about that
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“…I could not go pick her up until after he gets off work,” does he get off of work after she gets out of school? Is he going to bring her the things she needs or is he ignoring the fact that she started her period? If I were you I would respect what he said, but instead if her father can’t take a minute off work to help her, maybe bring her some lady supplies and also a café drink, but don’t forget to ask the school if y’all could take a minute (if it’s disrupting class) to show her how. Good luck!
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It should be what’s best for her well-being not what he wants
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Is there some way you can talk to the father and organise extra time she can be with him in lieu of missing the next 24 hours
i don’t see a reason or need to go get her. But you should be allowed to take her extra clothing and pads if needed, provide a little teaching moment from mom and then let her dad get her from school as he would normally. That’s comprising you get you what want which is to be there for this huge change and his time with her isn’t taken.
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That’s horrible I bet all that child wants to do is see her mum
Some dads are selfish arrogant pricks
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Um …I would’ve went and got her until he got off work atleast. He sounds like a Stubborn asshole! After reading a few of these comments, yeah he may be a parent too but in this case that is a big deal. I’m sure when she started her period it was most likely on her panties and outer clothing so…with that being said yes you are also a parent and, it’s likely she would want her mother to be the one to help her out with all that. I’m sure she was slightly embarrassed being at school and all. If dads at work and can’t be there to help her…I don’t see the problem with mom coming to help her until he can get off work. Why should she have to be stuck at school with blood running down her legs. When I first started I was at school and I had blood all over and, I didn’t get up from my seat until class was over when everyone left the room.
I don’t really have advice on what to do but i can help as the child’s point of view I started my period in last year juniors and my mum was at my nans funeral and could of left to bring me things but I told the school to get in touch with my dad as he was the one having me later on after school I wasn’t comfortable at first talking to my dad about it but as iv grown older I feel like it was good for me to be open to both my parents at the time about what was happening to my body. if I was on my period on future occasions on my dads weekend to have me, I would stay at home at mums until I felt better to go to visit my dad and my dad understood that… communication is key to all solutions
What an asshole dad… poor girl 
I have a 12 year old too and please believe I would be at that school so fast.
Womens business not mens.
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Urrrm go get your daughter! She needs you
What makes you think the father can’t handle it? Or will you make sure she’s at home every time she has a period?
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All depends if he knows how comfortable he is at explaining to her what’s happening to her body. I was 10 n my mom just couldn’t look at me as I tried to tell her but my dad took over explained what’s happening what n how to use sanitary pads but this was all in my mom’s presence. He used my mom’s underwear to demonstrate how to place the pads etc. Ask him that ud like to b present
I would go see her anyway seeing her isn’t harming anyone
Go get your daughter she needs you never mind anything else deal with him later !!
Dad’s a jerk but give him some tampons n tell him he can take the wheel. I’m sure this will change his mind very quickly.
I feel if she’s asking for you that he should let your daughter feel comfortable being with you for this particular moment. But since y’all are separated don’t make this a habit. He needs to know how to handle this situation as well otherwise you’re just gonna except her to come be with you for every period.
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Fuck what he says, if that was my daughter I’d go pick her up and cater to her needs cause alot of the time kids will feel more comfortable talking to mum about it rather then dad.
My daughter started her period a few months back, she’s also 12. I had the talk with her and her 10 year old sister ages ago, and regularly talked to them about it. When I had my period I showed them how to use pads, etc. I made sure they are/were prepared. When my 12 year old started, she was not freaked out. She was calm. Didn’t even need me. I think you’re freaking out way more than she is, that is IF you prepared her?
If he can get her what she needs id leave it, aslong as he isnt going to leave her without sanitary items !
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If he really cares so much about his daughter he will understand it’s in her best interest if both of you have a conversation with her . You because obviously you’ve gone through it you can tell her all the tips and tricks you have incase you don’t have pads and what tampons are for and allll of the deets but him because you want to make sure that if she does get her period at his house she can openly ask for pads or what not without feeling embarrassed. Or ashamed .
I personally wouldn’t give 2 fucks if my daughters dad told me not to go but that’s because he barely even knows her shoe size . He’s not really an active parent but if yours is then don’t take that away from him but Include him. If he says no. Then open those mama claws and snatch your attempt to co parent and just do it alone . His choice anyway .
Sorry just go and get her,
She needs her mum at this time not her dad.
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But it’s his time?
Hes not dumb? Obviously…you slept with him and had a child…therefor @ that time you would have made the decision that he’s capable of “being a father” … so what? Now you’re not together …now he’s not capable?.. common…she won’t die. Leave Dad deal with it
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Sad, but that’s the way it is
As sad as it is, he’s right.
The dad should know how to address this without you. He has to learn as well. Also you don’t need to pick her up from school. Its a period she didn’t lose a leg, unless it went through her clothes then I would suggest going to pick her up or bring her new clothes. Hopefully you talked to her enough and prepared her for this. But dad is right its still his day and if its court ordered you still need to follow that. Otherwise he can be a real jerk about it.
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he is an a total jerk but you have to comply if its court ordered
He’s right but a girl really needs her mother. Let him go get her and sit back And wait bc she will ask for u. I was so uncomfortable ab my dad even knowing I was on my period.
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Get your daughtet so you can get the proper necessities for her and see if she’s o.k. or has questions.
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My mom was away on a business trip when I got my first one and my dad did a great job
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Dads are perfectly fine handling a period
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Take her what she needs, and new clean clothes. Making her wait all day till he is off work is ridiculous for feminine hygiene products for a 12 year old’s first period. Would he know what to buy a 12 year old and not an adult woman? Some men/dads are totally clueless. Leaving her at school is fine, and it doesn’t cause legal problems with whatever court ordered visitation. No judge will ever get you for taking things she needs in this case to her at school.
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Unfortunately he is right. You can take her the items she may need but leave her at school.
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If she needs pads and a change if clothes, obviously take her what she needs. But don’t take her from school. She will be fine and dads are more than capable of taking care of this situation.
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Why would you need to pick her up? 12 years old is more than old enough that y’all should have already talked about periods in depth and she should be prepared for this day (ie have products and extra undies etc). I just don’t understand why you feel it’s necessary to pick her up early. Also, just want to point out that plenty of single dad’s tackle periods by themselves so there’s no reason he can’t educate himself on what products she might want/need. There’s no need for all these comments implying a dad wouldn’t/couldn’t be able to provide her with what she needs in this time.
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Watch a clip on YouTube about periods, by Bert Kreischer
There is no reason why u need to pick her up. Most schools have the supplies on hand for these girls that first start. The guidance counsellor is always on hand if there is a problem. Most dads does a great job.
Why does she need to be picked up? That’s what I need to know first before I can answer anything else.
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Controlling. This is mother/daughter time
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The school nurse will help with what is needed. And I suggest you and dad figure your crap out, so you can co-parent and not have a kiddo suffer for yours and his issues. Parenting time is not a tug of war. Yeah it’s crappy of him to do this, but it happens when mom and dad can’t co-parent. Drop supplies off for her.
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I would have picked her up and have her back at the school for him to pick her up after school day. You can be as prepared as possible and it can still be a very overwhelming time for the daughter and she more than likely doesn’t want to have to have these conversations with her dad right now. Dad needs to be more respectful of the daughter. I would also document it if y’all are in between court. 
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Go to that school and check on her. And then call her father from there and take her with you if she needs help or wants to go home early. You can always bring her to his house the same time she would have gotten there after school. I’m sorry, but unless he plans on doing the same and taking care of her himself right then, a girl needs her mom at this moment.
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I was with my dad when I started. He told me to shower and he went and got what I needed from the store. I don’t understand what the problem is lol
So In just about every state, police won’t enforce a parenting plan. They’ll tell him to take you to court. Go pick up your girl, and IF that dip shit takes you to court you can explain that your 12 yr old started her period for the first time and called you wanting you to come get her. He’s being a dick and not thinking about her well being and the fact that what she is dealing with is hard and she probably just wants her mom who will know what to do and how to help her because her father is clearly NOT sympathetic and hasn’t ever had a period. Tell him to eat shit and go get your poor girl.
Are all these women seriously asking why this young girl might need picked up? Ummm let’s see because it’s her first period? It can be fucking grueling mentally, physically and emotionally! I’m glad y’all’s first periods were so easy, but it’s not like that for everyone. Some people get it, and feel sick and deal with cramps so bad they puke, just want to cry and sleep on a heating pad. There are plenty of valid reasons why a young girl starting her first period might not want to be at school. Use your damn head you worthless fucks. That girl wants her mom during an alreAdy rough stage in her life. She deserves to have her mom
Bring her a change of clothes and period products but, leave her at school. I’m sorry but, if it is his time then allow him to have his time.
Would not stop mehe is a jerk
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Is he going to deal with her period without embarrassing her? If so that’s great but otherwise she probably needs her mom.
Lord I don’t get how yall can say leave her at school, I remember starting and I was prepared for it at school however the embarrassment of my class mates was enough to make me not leave the restroom my grandmother had to come get me or I would of stayed there all day! So if she wants to go home let the child and if i must say I prefer my mother when it comes to women’s bodies just because my dad had no experience with it.
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You shouldn’t leave her at school, at least get her a change of clothes and some feminine products, let dad know that you’ll be taking her home so that she can shower but that you’ll drop her right back off to him.
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way to make it about himself and not his daughter what a jerk! can you atleast go see her?
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My first one I started the morning of a school day, mom gave me a liner. We had a field trip that day, bled through my clothes looked like a murder scene. Was stuck on that field trip ALLLLLL DAY with no clothes, more “liners” and a bus full of just pure embarrassment. Good times!
I would go see her at school. Give her a big hug. Tell her to call you. That’s really hard getting your first period, and having to spend it with dad.
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I dont understand this whole thing of no its mine time crap like why cant people just co parents me and my husband and his ex always work things out we even change weekend if the other wants to do something i dont understand why it is always a fight i see this all the time it just doesnt make since to me
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I would go to the school with a change of clothes and what she needs.
I don’t understand why she had to get picked up from school, a change of clothes (if needed), some Tylenol, a hug, and some feminine products. You’ll be with her soon enough - she can make it a another day, I’m sure her dad has it under control.
Honestly, if he had the situation handled then I don’t see a reason she needed to be picked up. If she was prepared with the necessities or he is able to provide them, then let him do it! Now if the child requests to go to moms house then I would agree the dad should let her go, its only one day anyway.
Umm you can go get her… it might be his time but you could have picked her up and taken her to change and get what she needed and either dropped her back off to him or taken her back to school. Honestly, most police won’t even bother with this. They’d probably just tell the dad well she didn’t keep her the whole time and took her back to school. However, you could always go to the school and give her a change of clothes and the supplies she needs to take to her dad’s…
Not this one. She needs mom!!!