12 year old daughter started her first menstrual period at school this morning but Dad told her I could not come pick her up from school until after he get off work because it is “his parenting time until tomorrow.” What are your thoughts?
Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. Daughter started her period, and her dad won't let me come get her
I’d be getting her anyways
No, I’d come anyways because that’s a mothers “rights”
I would’ve just gone and got her.
If it is a legal thing then unfortunately- you can’t pick her up if it’s dads time. Or you could be held in contempt.
Really shitty of dad, though. Like… makes me want to punch him for you. I’m sorry he’s being like that to your daughter. That’s not cool.
He’s not with her at school, and she probably needs paper supplies and some comfort from mom…so…
Nope. Go get your daughter.
That is definitely not good!!! You should get her anyway and get custody!!
Odd person out here but it’s his time, unless she specifically asked YOU to go get her, I don’t see why you can’t wait til tomorrow.
I understand it’s her first period but I’m sure dad is fully capable of handling the situation
He can pick her up from your place wth
I’d go get her and let him get mad and let the judge be mad about it too. It’s her first period. She asked for her mom, she needs her mom. Dad doesn’t understand and he couldnt no matter how hard he tried. It’s a woman thing and his issue here is a control issue. Not a parenting one. If he was thinking like a normal dad he’d let the mom handle the situation. In my opinion at least.
Has he taken her any products??
Hell no I would be there and any father in the right mind would want the mother to help her in this drastic change of life
He can handle it, call her and ask if she needs anything, tell him what to buy
I’m sure she will ask for u Maybe he will be more lenient and give in then?
He is being a terrible father right now.
I would get her anyways from school but take her to him when he gets off work. Today is important for you and your daughter to be together. To talk.
I’d go get her. He can pick her up from your place. Not about him. It’s about your daughter
OMG! What is wrong with him?
Mom’s understand, Dad’s don’t!
Is he going to take her to the store and get supplies without embarrassment! Probably not!
Go to your daughter!
I’d go get my baby and he would just have to get over it. He can come get her from you after he gets off work if he doesn’t want his time cut short. He’s just being an ass and not thinking about what’s best for his daughter anyway!
Wait it’s Saturday… she have Saturday school?
Let Dad be part of this young lady’s experience. Although Mom feels like she needs her and the little girl may feel like she needs mom but Dad needs to know what it’s like to have a young lady and not a little girl anymore.
She’s your child even when it’s his time This is a major life event for a young woman and she needs her mother He should understand that and if he doesn’t oh well
Go get her!! The worst he can do is try to file contempt against u which wont fly given the situation
I’d go anyway and get my daughter fuck that. I was MISERABLE when I got my period. Everything hurt. I was bleeding. I was tired and people kept saying I was being mean. I didn’t understand. Yes my mom talked to me about it but we all know it’s different in the trenches. Especially the first time.
Idc if he picks her up from my house but I’m getting my daughter NEOWWWWW!!
So what. Unless she would rather be with you. He her dad
I’d already be on my way!
It’s his time regardless. At least he’s handling it.
I would be there in a heartbeat no matter what he said
Just go get her I wouldn’t care if inwas contempt my daughter needs me then I punch the mofo so glad I don’t have to deal with my baby daddy to my first one
Go get your kid. Fuck him.
He should of let you your daughter needed her mumma at this time. That’s no need for that he should put his lil girl first and she wants
My thoughts are screw what he says
He’d have to come pick her up for us to talk about in person later. I’d catch a charge over that, GLADLY.
Girl go get your baby girl fuck him respectfully
Just take her the products she needs.
Even though yes it’s the dad’s time I fully understand that but in reality they are both her parents so at a time like this when a girl wants there momma for a woman issue then I think the dad is in wrong for not allowing it. This is where so many kids get hurt in the co-parenting process. If my son needed his dad for a man issue rather it’s my time or not he wants his dad that’s what he will get because it’s not about his dad nor myself it’s about our child and what’s best for our child because it’s our child’s time not mine not his.
Dad is an insensitive A-hole
I would ask the barin if she happy enough to stay with dad go for it if she want you then fine she’s old enough to make her own mind it’s her period surly it’s fair to give her the choice this 1 time xx
Screw him. GO GET HER
Go get her - first time she needs mom
Make a visit to the school and take what she needs and see her later. Pick your battles!
What does your daughter want? If he’s completely comfortable with what this entails and she’s comfortable with him being the one helping, it should be okay.
Go get your daughter. take her to his place after school would get out. But get her from school and spend the afternoon with her. It’s too bad he’s being dramatic.
I personally would’ve gone and got her and then when he got off work he could’ve picked her up or what not that’s my child and if they call needing me I am on my way no matter what !
IF your daughter asked for you then yes, go. If she didn’t then thats a different story.
Leave it alone unless she expressly is asking for you. Dad can handle it. I’m sure he’s not a stranger to a woman’s period. The school (if it’s worth it’s salt) should be stocked with feminine supplies. You won’t be able to rip your daughter out of school everytime she gets her period.
He’s gonna be pissed if when she refuses to go at all then —- which won’t be long if this is how he behaves
He’s a selfish ass! What does daughter want? That should be priority!
He can get her from you later. I’m sorry, but no judge is going to be upset that you took care of a personal issue for your daughter and he will look like a complete a hole if he tries to take you to court over it. Go get your baby.
Unpopular opinion. She is fine. She started but may not want to make it a big deal. I’m sure he’s handling it and helping her out.
I mean … as a mom I get it … I think he’s being petty … but that’s what court orders are for
I might get hate for this but I’m on the other end of this. Dads can handle their children just as much as their mother can. If dad is handling it, let him handle it. All dads aren’t incompetent.
He’s also her parent too so he’s capable of handling this as well. I started my period the day I went to my dads house for 2 weeks. My first one ever. My dad bought me what I needed and answered the questions I had. Dads are capable too
Id go get my kid i wouldn’t care.
If she comfortable, then leave it alone…
It’s a Mother/Daughter/Bonding/FEMALE issue. He’s being a real POS !
Does she need to go home
Legally if it’s his time it’s his time
Why would you need to go get her? He’s her father, I’m sure he’s capable of sorting a pad and fresh clothes for her if necessary. Give him the chance…
Tell him to jog on and collect her.
Let dad do it she will call you if she need you
Hes not able to go get her what she needs?
If she wants you, just go…
I kinda want to know what happens…
If she needs you and wants you or is t sure what to do and needs moms coaching then I would absolutely
Go get her and possible make accommodations for “make up” time if necessary. The child and their needs comes first. If she’s okay and everything’s fine then leave it be and let dad have his time as scheduled.
Go get yourself child tf? He needs to get over himself cause what girl wants to be around their dad when their on their first period if they don’t have to be. She needs her mother
Let the daughter decide for the day, it’s definitely a day she may want her mom. Besides she may be an emotional mess that wants to be able to ask questions without being embarrassed.
I’m pretty sure Dad can handle it. If she needs extra clothes you can take them to her but he’ll be with her when she has it again he needs to know how to handle it.
What an asshole!! He is obviously not thinking about what is best for her
Sounds like a bitter asshole. If you got a call, I would go. But I raised two girls mostly by myself, screw what he thinks.
I would go get her and tell dad look I’m sorry but I know what it’s like I k ow it’s ur time but we can sort that out so ur not missing out on time but she needs her mum right now x
I’m torn. If she wants you then her dad needs to just swallow his pride and let this be a thing with you and her. If she’s fine then let him have his shot at supporting her during this first. Could be good for her to realize that even though women go through this men can support them through it!
He is dad, this is his right. Wait your turn. Neither parent should be using that as an excuse to cut the other parents time
My bonus daughter got hers here… her dad was find. Asked me for tips ect. But hes a girl dad too not just a boy dad. He’s got to know how to handle all feminine situations. We let her mom know and all he said was ok. We dealt with it. Kid asked her questions which weren’t many since we’ve talked about it and prepared her as much as you can until she actually experienced it and on We went. You don’t need her. And unless she asks for you specifically she’s fine with her dad…
Its his parenting time, dads are perfectly capable of handling it!
So its dad time. Yes. He should handle it. If he’s not handling it then by all means help her. I Dont think it permits getting her out of school. Maybe take clothes to the school as well as extra pads. But the nurses will have something to give her until she can get her own.
One she’ll be fine until tomorrow and if you talked to her like you should have then there shouldn’t really be an issue. I don’t think you should be allowed to take her during his time just because she started her period. She’ll still be on her period tomorrow. A court order states dad gets this time and you’re crap for trying to take that from him.
Umm… He’s her parent too he can’t help her? If he’s a decent dad, and sounds like he is, then leave it alone. What are you going to do past explaining products to her… Which you should have already done. They will be fine. Don’t make this about you when it’s about her.
Dad sounds like he’s more worried about “his time” even though he’s at work, more than his own child’s needs or wants… Personally I would pick my daughter up and tend to her and drop her back off to her dad when he got off work, it’s not like he’s actually spending time at the moment if she is in school and he’s at work. But that’s just me
It’s something that she’s going to deal with every month for quite a while now so I don’t really see the need to disrupt the schedule for it especially if she’s coming back to you in the next day or two. Men can handle their daughters having their period… give them a little credit.
depends. what does your DAUGHTER want. If she’s cool w going to dad’s why do you have to pick her up? If she’s not, why is he being an ass?
He can parent… lol almost every girl gets a cycle. Wait till its your parenting time…
Tell him to eff off and just go get her
As someone who got her period when I was at my dads house, there was nothing more embarrassing than talking to my dad about it. I actually called my mom and had her talk to my dad lol I would’ve liked to be with my mom that’s for sure
Douch bag. Worried about himself and not what’s best for his daughter.
Does he know what to do???
Yeah, it’s not really right of you to take her because of that reason. When you guys decided to split up, you knew you’d have to share the kids. It is his day and tomorrow you can help her and give her tips that he may have missed
That’s just pure control what an ass
I would tell him to pick her up from school though if he can
He is right its his time with the kid.
Idk why everyone feels the need to say “DaDs ArE cApAbLe ToO” when nowhere does it say they aren’t. How does anyone know the daughter isn’t asking for her mother since it’s her very first period?? I know my husband is more than capable to handle stuff like this but if she wants her mom then her mom should be able to go get her.
People suggesting that the dad should be there for her…
When I first started my cycle I was embarrassed and definitely didn’t want to talk about it with my dad.
I didn’t even want to talk about it with my mom because that was our relationship
But from the post she is asking for mom, then she should be able to go with mom atleast until dad gets out of work
I would go get her for sure!
I can’t speak to the parenting plan, but what I did for my daughter is I brought her a makeup bag with pads, her favorite chocolate bar, flushable wipes and an “I love you kiddo” note inside of it.She was at school, so I wanted it to look like something other than a “welcome to womanhood” kit to everyone but her. That’s why I went with a makeup bag. It’s just a suggestion, something to remind her that it’s natural and you are there for her.
If you’re wanting to pick her up because she bled through clothes just drop extra clothes off at the front office along with some pads for when she goes back to dad’s and she can get them at the front desk. No need to take his time away from him. She will be fine.
My teens got theirs at their dad’s. He was more than capable of handling it. Talk with her if she needs you, and if she really wants to spend time with you, she can have a talk with dad about it when he gets home. Then you guys can maybe work something out as a team, maybe switching a few days to make up for the time.
Just bring her a change of clothes and pads. She doesn’t need to leave school.
Smh at the end of the day he will NEVER understand how comforting it is to have your mom or mother figure there with you when you experience your first period