Me and my ex bring each other stuff all the time. I’m in a relationship and have been for years. Not only do we (me and the ex) have kids with each other but we are friends. We call each other almost on the daily and he calls my boyfriend if there’s problems with his truck as he’s a mechanic. We celebrate our children’s birthdays together. It’s not a big issue unless someone makes it one. My boyfriend knew that my kids and I were a package deal and they would always come first and it meant accepting that their father would be around as well. I told him if he couldn’t accept that then I wasn’t the one to be dating. 
He accepted and we’ve been together every since.
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They have a healthy relationship after divorce and share a child together. No matter what u say or do they will always care about eachother in 1 way or another they shared a life a marriage a child. If you can’t accept that, leave. It’s better than sitting in a relationship your insecure in u have to really be comfortable and confident when it comes to blended families or relationships cause no matter thay will always be the mother of his child or father of her child etc
The fact they are on such good terms and they still are thoughtful and co parent healthy is a good thing for them and their daughter. Don’t try snd step in and ruin that by making it out to be a cheating or insecure thing
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I see both sides. That being said the ex talk about their marriage and things they shared or did together is in appropriate. If the shoe were on he other foot I wander how he would feel?
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Get over it. If you’re going to be the jealous type then maybe you should consider leaving this relationship. Books and things from a thrift store. Plus she has a boyfriend for almost a year. And they have a daughter together
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This is why so many parents struggle to coparent because the new partner has a problem with the way they do things.
She’s not being inappropriate, they’re not having sex, she isn’t sending him nudes. They’re not sneaking around.
They’re being friends.
She’s saving you money …that’s how i look at it lol
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My ex husband is one of my best friends I always have his back but there’s nothing romantic there anymore whatsoever your over thinking it
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Leave it be.
Let the co-parent and it doesn’t matter if she gets him gifts.
There is no underlying issues there. I would probably do the same thing if I saw something and thought of someone.
And yes they have memories and a child together. That will never change. So if you have a problem with it I’d leave now because things probably aren’t going to change.
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Some people are not use to a healthy relationship or friendship
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Id be saying where the fuks my book 
that’s weird
I’d get my ex shit if it was for fathers Day, birthdays, Xmas day for the kids sake. Thinking of him and just buying things for him POST marriage is different, but I wouldn’t say it’s wrong.
They’re going to have memories, it’s how it is. Soon, memories will include the WHOLE family, just give it time.
Just appreciate that you don’t have to get it for him coz it’s already done
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I wouldnt care. They seem to have a bond. It doesnt sound like she still wants him.
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Don’t care. Ya know books at a thrift store are 50 cents.
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Wouldn’t bother me unless they were acting like they were cheating. They’re family because of those kids. It’s okay for them to act like it. 
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Sounds like you’re jealous of the relationship your boyfriend & his ex has
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It’s sounds like they are realllly good friends! My best friend and her ex have the same kind of relationship and let me tell how much their son THRIVES from it!
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It really depends on people’s boundaries and there’s a million in one ways to look at this situation.
Is she not over him still? Are they just good friends and coparents now and she likes to get him gifts? Is she trying to keep the peace? Is she trying to upset the new girlfriend? Is the new girlfriend overthinking this? Is the new girlfriend under thinking this? Is this a big deal? Is this a small issue?
Honestly, I would talk to her woman to woman and say “hey, I think it’s awesome that you and my boyfriend get along and coparent so well! It does make me feel a little weird when you two only talk about your past memories when I’m around, and I’m also a little uncomfortable with all of the gifts you give him. Maybe we can come to an agreement with those things?”
Or, you can just take it as thank god they get a long! Because not a lot of ex’s do!
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So what good friends would do ? You have to understand that your not the only person that likes him. Just because she buys him small things doesn’t mean she wants to take him from you.
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Don’t make a mountain out of a mole hill
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Depends on the scenario. My eldest son’s dad and I got along awesome and the co-parenting was healthy. Us being friends showed my son how people can respect each other even if they’re not together anymore. My son has a great relationship with his dad. Maybe talk to your partner and ask him to Maybe either slow the gift giving down or maybe make the gifts come from the kid instead. I’m sure there’s a happy medium that can be reached.
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I mean I think if it is a special occasion like bday or from the kids or something, but that’s a bit odd. Idk though it sounds like a boundary YOU need. If it upsets you then it shouldn’t matter how anyone else feels. We all have our own feelings. Does her guy mind? Maybe it is harmless to them but if it is harming you, then that’s a problem.
I wish I had a good enough relationship with my ex to do nice things for each other and show our sons a healthy friendship but we don’t have that.
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Gift over drama any day.
Little things fly away
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Sounds like they’re friends. That is great! Maybe she will buy you presents too
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Honestly in MY opinion if it was ME It would make me feel awkward …I have a child with my ex and he has a child with his ex we don’t buy our exes gifts… the gifts isn’t even the worst part the worst part is her talking about her past with him to me that’s weird if my bf talked around me about his ex and would take about there past relationship it would make me feel like he didn’t love me or respected me I think it’s rude … I know your bf didn’t do that his ex did that to you but imagine how that makes her boyfriend feel and you …I think it’s a bit odd but it’s great they coparent together that’s the main thing
Unless there is boundary issues that border on cheating/inappropriate intimacy I wouldn’t worry too much
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You have every right to feel the way you do. Perhaps though you may want to consider that they had a relationship before you and they are doing the best for their kid. When you started dating your boyfriend you would have known he came with a history. Working out how you fit in to it comfortably is the key. There must be a middle ground here for all of you. If it bothers you then there is an issue that needs to be sorted. Lots of communication not just to your boyfriend but maybe the ex too might go a long way. Maybe having a talk to the ex might put your mind at ease a little.
What’s the problem sound like a healthy co parenting relationship.
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Make an Amazon gift list with items you want but tell her it’s got him… spoil yourself with her money.
Then make her feel foolish.
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Sounds like this is just a girl you have personal problems with 
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You are just a girlfriend, mind y’a business and be thankful they are doing right by that baby.
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bro. Then how about you buy him books & things?
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They were friends before they were lovers. They’ve decided they are better off as friends. Since they coparent, she is always going to be a part of his life, and he is always going to be a part of hers. They are family in that way. The more civil they can be with each other, the better off everyone will be. If she does thoughtful things for him, I’m sure she does it as a friend, not imposing anything else on him.
I wouldn’t say you’re jealous of her, but maybe a little insecure about your relationship with him, around her. They have history that you weren’t a part of.
It’s kindof like being with a long time friend, and your friend runs into another friend that you didn’t know. They start talking in a foreign language that you don’t understand, or they start reminiscing about people & events that you’re not familiar with. It makes you feel left out.
I wouldn’t worry. The fact that he is open & honest with you, that he brings you with him when he has to meet her for visitation exchanges, etc., means he is including you as much as he can in that part of his life. It shows he is not trying to hide anything from you.
The reason she shares memories with you of her & him together is because HE is the only thing that the two of you have in common. She’s trying to include you in their lives, and she’s trying to make you feel comfortable around her. Maybe she’s just as nervous or insecure about being around you. You are the step parent to her child, so it would only be natural that she would want to get to know you.
It doesn’t sound like you have anything to worry about. Just be open & honest with him about how you feel, try to respect their co-parenting relationship, and make the effort to be a part of the family.
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If there is no romantic intent behind the gift… appreciate that they are able co-parent in a healthy manner. No drama.
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Literally anyone is allowed to give my husband free shit whenever they want 
If I ever saw my ex’s favorite comic books at a discount count store or something he collected big time I would definitely get it for him. It’s something kind and the world needs more kindness
Spreadthelove
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I am a shrink. The issue is this: they are in a relationship, that means caring about each other’s feelings, so how does he respect her feelings? Part 2: she needs to work on this issue.
You can be friends and keep boundaries at the same time to be respectful of the person you’re dating, if you feel insecure ask him for reassurance. Some of us have been betrayed this way so it’s only natural to feel a little uncomfortable, not so much a matter of insecurity.
Sounds like a healthy friendship/coparenting relationship. She brings up old things from their relationship cause that’s literally probably Atleast 80% of what they shared together
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Why not just be straight forward with her… say I’m new to this mix, is this your guys’ normal? Always go straight to the source!
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Shiit I’d be telling his ex if you really wanna go all out for him, buy him a new car 
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My ex husband is my best friend. My fiancé and he get along great. His girlfriend is someone that I consider a true friend. She is wonderful to my kids/grandkids. My ex will buy me small things when he runs across something he thinks that I would like. I do him as well. He is and will always be family and I will always have a familial love for him. I explained our relationship to my fiancé when we first started getting serious. I gave him an out if he couldn’t handle it. The ex is the father/grandfather of my kids, our memories together go back 30 years. If I didn’t reminisce about him I couldn’t about any of my past. He is my past and I will cherish all the good memories we made and talk about them. I don’t have any romantic feelings for my ex and haven’t in many years, would never want to be romantically involved. I would however give him a kidney, take care of him in a time of sickness, feed or shelter him if ever needed. Maybe your boyfriend and his ex have a familial love and that’s why they get along so great. Don’t try to step in or you will lose the opportunity to be involved. Doesn’t mean they have romantic feelings.
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sounds like she’s just trying to find common ground with you, the only thing you guys have in common right now is him. maybe change the subject, bring up other topics to try to see what else you could have in common. as for the things she’s buying him I wouldn’t worry about it. Ask him to ask her to stop if it really bothers you.
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I’ve been through this myself. My ex and I were best friends. Did holidays and birthdays for the kids as a family, new gf and my bf at the time always invited… many times he would call me and ask for coffee at work so id bring it… Things like that. If I made a meal I knew he loved I’d bring him and his girl some leftovers. Anything like that, yep sure did . He did the same for me. Never once was it anything sexual, we both moved on, we were both happy. We were legit just best friends. The girl he was dating then had a big problem with it even though she was always included and needless to say it caused too big of a problem for them and he left her. I cannot say what is or isn’t going on in your situation but you have to stand back and weigh out your decision on how to proceed. I can tell you that if you love him, try to trust him. I would try to involve myself as someone who cares about the kids and loves him. Show him you support what is best for their kids. Don’t go overboard though making yourself look obsessed, but I know it is possible and healthy to have a good co-parenting relationship that is not sexual. I wish you the best!
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I personally don’t fully know how to answer this question… Before my ex boyfriend passed away in 2021. We would hang out and etc. My ex boyfriend is my best friend. I known him since I was 8 and he was 14 but we met back up when I was 30 and he was 36. He was separated from his wife for 2 years before me and him got together. (His wife was dating/living with another man). Well me and my ex boyfriend/best friend broke up, he got back with his wife ( His wife’s boyfriend at the time broke up with her and kicked her out)… Me, my biological daughter, my best friend/ex boyfriend all lived together and when his wife got kicked out I had her move in with us. I can’t see anyone on the street. Me and her never had beef with each other. We actually became friends and still friends even thou my best friend has passed away. I have gone to birthday parties (their grandson’s birthday party), went to shopping together, went to a fun center together with my daughter and their kids (her 2 daughters (his step daughters), their son, and their grandkids). She has drove me to and from work numerous times and we actually worked together for couple months until we was let go. To me my best friend/ex boyfriend’s family became part of mine and my daughter’s family. I have brought my ex boyfriend gifts (towels, clothes, games) and I have brought his wife a bracelet (for Christmas) and brought gifts for their grandkids. So in my opinion if it’s bothering you and he knows then he is in the wrong. But I personally don’t see nothing wrong with it. My daughter isn’t my ex boyfriend’s daughter. My current boyfriend’s baby momma has brought my boyfriend a cross necklace and a hoodie for his birthday/father’s day from the kids. I personally didn’t see nothing with it because it was basically from the kids.
Unless it’s a holiday or a birthday it’s a little weird depends on the items and what kind of stories she’s telling you how weird it is exactly
They will forever be family. You need to figure out why it triggers you and deal with the root.
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My husband and I were together 27 years. The last decade was awful for us and our kids. We’ve been separated 3 years and we are very close now. We have 3 children together 2 young adults and a 17 year old. Our family is finally at peace. We are not only friends but forever family. We have no romantic feelings for each other but we have a lot of history and that’s going to always be there. We have no problem with each other dating and moving on. But we have a deal that we have to be in a relationship a year or more before we introduce any significant other to the kids. That way they can understand that we will always have almost 3 decades together. It may not be easy for anyone new but we aren’t there yet. I just know I’m not interested in my husband in a romantic way anymore. Not sure if that helps
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Um no you have no right to be mad she spent his life on him
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Sounds like she’s still with him, why are they divorced if they get along so well?
She has no business buying him anything their no longer married parenting the child is good that’s as far as it should go
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She’s probably jealous if she feels the need to bring old times up during pick up and drop off. Just keep it respectful. Unless it was father’s day I wouldn’t get my ex anything but to each their own
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Sounds like your issue to be honest and you’re looking for a reason.
He’s a great dad and has a great relationship with his ex who obviously CARES about him. Which isn’t the same as is still in love with him.
Neither of them have committed to anyone since their divorce so you really don’t have a leg to stand on. You’re the gf. Not the wife. And even if you were…you should still be grateful AF you’re the only drama going on because you can actually fix this.
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I don’t like it, seems disrespectful to you
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I think it’s weird people consider their exs their best friends. If that person is so great that you wanna be best friends with them, why did you get divorced or split up?
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I bet she buys things for other people at the Thrift Shop too because she sees great deals and thinks to herself. “I know who would like this!”. Her ex just happens to be one of those people on her list. She just likes to shop.
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Give. The. Man. Some. Credit,. Hes Married to you!! Right??
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Let’s flip it, as this was my scenario but the other way round, so my new fella hated how close me and my (ex husband) were. If the kids wanted him to come over for dinner, we’d invite him and I’d cook, if he wanted to FaceTime the kids at any point, he did if he didn’t have money to take them out but wanted to come see him id let him 100%. My children love it, and my childrens welfare is my priority, he didn’t like that, so he got booted. Not everyone will agree with how ex relationships co-parent, but it’s so nice compared to some of the toxic ones I’ve seen. If I see something he needs, but can’t afford I’ll straight to get it for him, and say it’s from the kids, he would do the same for me. It’s about looking out for each other x
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If they are still friends and coparenting & still get along for
The child,I don’t really see an issue if she sees something at a thrift store she knws he likes and grabs it,I don’t see a problem!Its probably only .25,unless you feel like theirs something still
Goin on with the 2 wats the issue
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Shit money you don’t have to spend.
They ended as friends. That’s the best possibly thing for their children. Let them be, and work on what you’re feeling threatened instead.
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They both built relationships in the past so now they became close as friends.
So now that they built a circle amongst their past, they still have that bond. I wouldn’t be mad if they’re co-parent and not have bitter relationships among them.
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Hmm, I would mention little thoughtful gifts she could buy for me as well until I make up my mind how I am going to feel about it 
.
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She is definitely overstepping. Draw a line and establish strong boundaries - make sure your bf is on board as well. She has no reason to be buying him gifts and reminiscing about their life with you. They can still be friends without all that.
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I wouldn’t be comfortable with the gifts or the stories. But, you don’t want to ruin a good parenting relationship. You can’t control what she does, but seems like she still cares a little too much. Keep your radar on. And be with him when he drops and picks up the child.
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Maybe she sees it while she’s out & about & just thinks she likes it so she gets it for him?
If it bothers you, talk to the ex wife about it & your boyfriend.
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Co parenting is great, but the gifts aren’t necessary.
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I would. Not. Worry. About. It they. Dont.hide. it
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I do this. My ex does this. My current does this with his ex. Knowing someone on a core level doesn’t go away. We can co parent and be friends, but if I didn’t like his ex it would probably psssssss me off
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Seems fine to me. Probably great for the kid to see his parents still be respectful to each other.
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Honestly I think it depends on each person. If you don’t like it and find it disrespectful then you have a right to feel that and say something about it. He should respect your feelings and take them into consideration.
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I buy my ex and his family stuff but I give it “from the kids” we also don’t talk unless it’s about the kids and we’re not really friends. She may just be a giving person.
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So it sounds like they are friends and co-parents and you need to chill.
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For the child’s sake this is amazing
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If you tell a man once how you feel, that’s all it should take. What he does from that moment on is your answer. If it bothers you, and you told him and he brushed it off, then you are the one that needs to make a change. Either accept it or move on honey. They have something established. The ex knows what she’s doing. Your man is enjoying the attention. You can’t control these people, only yourself. So what are you going to do because a line wasn’t crossed because your man didn’t draw a line to begin with. Walk away gracefully and tel him while you admire their friendship and co parenting, you will not over look something like that and although you like him, that relationship is not for you.
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I stil buy my ex bits(or did til i couldnt afford to due to no job)
He has a gf.
He cheated on me to be with her.
We have a good friendship and i refuse to allow this person to take away that she had everything else.
Im the better person. And honestly its not my problem how she feels. Bet she dont know that ive fed her etc when it was truely hard for them.
They dont seem to hide anything from you. And have history
He might read too much into your feels about this and it drives a wedge between you. You will the one who allowed that to happen to you both.
Chill.
Take few deep breaths.
And some more. Smile sweetley and dont raise to her. It will get to her more if shes doing this to upset you. And youre showing its not working. Xx
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Omg bond with her stop this petty ass BS on two parents co-parenting. My son’s father was married and we all bonded for the children.
That wouldn’t fly with me. Unresolved feelings ! Bye move on if he can’t tell her to stop. It’s like here remember me when you read this or whatever. Knowing she got him the stuff. Oh when you look at that remember I got it for you. Ya no. Anyone who allows this behavior is not right. To have a constant reminder of his ex lmfao ya no
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You always have a right to feel! No one can take that from you. It’s what you do with that feel. That’s what matters. And how does that partner make you feel when you feel this way. Their response to your feeling will be the eye opener to what would be good honest communication or bad communication. See what kind of person is through these things. It will only prove if he is what you want.
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I don’t coparent I’m a single parent, but my boyfriend coparents very well with his exs. But NONE of them have bought anyone anything? They buy stuff for the kids, that’s it. It’s weird that she buys him stuff and honestly she could still like him. I think him brushing your feelings under the rug was rude, and if you like her and have a good relationship with her then I would bring it up with her, she might be understanding to it. Being in a relationship with someone who coparents is hard. My BD has never been around so my bf hasn’t ever experienced what I feel. A lot of these women who seem to be mean about it just ignore them. Everyone is different and it’s no one’s place to judge what makes you uncomfortable.
Co parenting and remaining friends can happen between 2 mature adults.
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i read all this stuff about blended families and everyone getting along . i wish i was in the same boat , when i left i lost his family , my ex mother in law etc , it’s sad , him and i are to different but i wish for the kids sake that we could do birthday parties, dinners christmas stuff etc as a blended family.
but we live completely different lives i have another baby to my fiancé and him and his fiancé don’t even know there own childrens sibling.
it’s really sad . be greatful your part of a blended family that works. cause some of us mums would want nothing more then to be able to have a healthy co parenting relationship
I am friends with my ex and have bought him small gifts. I am not trying to be more than a friend. No reason to be insecure especially if in another relationship!
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Co-parenting after a relationship burns to the ground is hard work. I have been doing so for the past 8 years with my ex (after a 14 year relationship) and over the years it has gotten easier. We can buy each other things randomly (nothing crazy personal), talk to one another about non-children related topics, and have made a friendship out of the ashes. It is in the greatest interest of our children to do so. I have been with my fiancé for 7 years and he is completely understanding of the situation. We have a blended family and I wish that my man could have the same relationship with his ex when it comes to the kids instead of all the drama. It only takes from the children’s happiness. My ex’s girlfriends over the years have not been so understanding most of the time, but if they cant understand our dynamics as parents then that’s their loss and honestly just their problem. It is plain insecurity on their part. I can stake my life on never ever ever ever wanting my ex back, there is a reason he is my ex, and that shit will never change. But a positive relationship/friendship to show the kids is truly priceless. You can’t be insecure about the past, its there and is not going anywhere. We help each other when we can. Hell, he even bought me a used vehicle when mine broke down a few years ago when I fell on hard times and I’ve helped him out with things on occasion also. We try to be understanding about each other’s lives and circumstances. And at the end of the day, our kids are happy, healthy, and get to see their parents get along. Win win win. Try to understand, try to see past your insecurity and jealously. It will make the situation 100x better if you look at it from the perspective of the children involved. Sending you good vibes to get through this to a point of understanding.
For the children’s sake and for ease of being around the other parents through the child’s life events, be grateful that they get along. I have a great relationship with my ex husband and accepted his wife and her child as family as well. This is how healthy adults should interact. I would buy gifts for my children to give their father when they were younger and I still remind them about his birthday, father’s day,etc…
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I wouldn’t mind. They should still care about one another. I think it’s healthy as coparents who have good memories together to remain fond of one another in a platonic way. It doesn’t mean she’s still pining for him. But even if she is hung up on him, if he is committed to you then her feelings are not a threat to your relationship anyway.
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Honestly if more people could co parent the way it sounds these two do the world would be a lot less hectic… maybe reach out to her see if you can get a coffee and find some mutual ground there is every chance that she truly cares for him as a friend?
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Oh hell no. He would be out
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It’s kinda weird for sure.
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Sounds like she still would like a romantic evening with him. Keep the home fires burning. No way
If you don’t like it let him know. Just because other’s feel it’s okay those are their feelings! You are entitled to YOUR feelings. They broke up and moved on for a reason. Everyone can get along for the child’s sake but the other stuff can cease. It most definitely wouldn’t fly with me.
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Get your hubby to have her get some books you like. 
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I used to buy my ex things but, my oldest would give it to him. It’s a good way for kids to see that they still get along and also it’s exciting to the child to hand presents. My oldest love language is gifts so he loves giving people things.
I wouldn’t spend a lot of money though on the gifts just cheap things like favourite lollies or out fits that match my sons because it made my sons day wearing something like his dad.
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Boyfriend is not equal to husband. You are coming across as jealous, which is never attractive.
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It just sounds like co parenting to me and friendship unless they are spending time alone together then I wouldn’t worry
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I wouldn’t mind the buying of gifts really. Me & my ex (kids Dad) worked hard to stay friends/friendly after our break up because it made co parenting easier & better. My kids found adjusting to us being seperated a lot more easier seeing me & their Dad getting along & not fighting. If I’m in a shop & I see something that my ex likes it does pop in to my head to buy it for him. Now I have absolutely no romantic feelings for him whatsoever. I see him as a friend but I would shovel shit before I would consider being with him again. Over my dead body lol but I would still buy him a gift just like I’d do for me female friends. There would be no hidden agenda. It would just be a nice thing to do. No more no less. Now my ex has a girlfriend so I don’t buy him anything out of respect for her because I worry she’ll get the wrong idea so it’s not worth it if there’s a possibility it’ll cause drama. Not everyone realizes that it may upset the new girlfriend so she might be doing it & have no clue about how you feel. She also might be doing it because use 2 get along well & because use are friends she thinks it’s ok & wouldn’t upset you. Point is that it really could be innocent & she means no harm. The whole talking about their past relationship in front of you is a little inappropriate though. All women know that we don’t like hearing stories about our boyfriends & what they did with their ex… So I don’t know why she’s thinks its ok?!? Weird? You need to tell her to stop. If you can’t do it then you need to tell your bf how it makes you feel & ask him to tell her to stop or to at least tell him to stop her in her tracks when she talks about it in the future. As soon as she brings something up get him to tell her “I don’t wanna talk about our past so let’s change the subject etc”. Either way I hope you can sort it out & make the situation in to one you are more comfortable with
they’re getting along and being friendly, there’s nothing wrong with that
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Personally this wouldn’t bother me in this scenario but I can see why it could make others a little scatty (I couldn’t think of a better word). I see it as friendship and if they co-parent well and she’s in a relationship too it doesn’t sound as if she’s trying to get in about your man. Everyone likes to reminisce and it sounds like she’s just enjoying going over those memories as there’s no chance to really go over them with anyone else but then I wouldn’t know if it seems as if she’s trying to be possessive or not? It could go either way but you just have to try and pick up how they seem every other time… If you like her surely you couldn’t see her bringing up memories as her trying to point out he was hers first etc? If not then her buying bits and pieces is just keeping that friendship as she knows him well. If she is trying to be possessive however then her buying things is another way to keep him thinking of her and he will have a constant reminder on how well she knows him… I’d suggest speaking directly to her and airing your feelings. If she’s nice she’ll take it on the chin, realise it’s upsetting you and stop doing it. If she doesn’t agree to stop chances are she’s being a possessive cow and you’ll need to have a bigger discussion with your partner. Hope it’s not the latter! Xx
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They might just be better as friends. I think if my hubby and I ever got divorced, we’d be that way.
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Ewe. No. If you aren’t ok with it then it’s not ok.
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I buy my ex husband things from his daughter for bday, fathera day, and Christmas. But that’s it