My ex and I were high school sweethearts, and we share two children together. We were together for 21 years and engaged for many years. We are now friends, and I am friends with his girlfriend, there are no hard feelings. Here’s where I need to help to process something. He proposed last weekend to his girlfriend…with the same ring I wore for years before I ended the engagement due to his drinking problem and lack of being a responsible adult for myself and our kids. There are no romantic feelings, and I’m not jealous, but I feel like the ring represents the good times and the love that we once had. We had discussed making it into a necklace for me or giving it to our boys; now it will likely be given to his new fiancées daughter. Am I wrong for feeling a little sad about this? Am I holding too much sentimental value to a possession? Is it tacky that she knows that was my ring and flaunts it?
Well it’s his to do what he wants, so…
Very tacky in my opinion.
I’d be sad and hurt over that too! That’s special. And I also definitely would not wear a ring that once belonged to his ex 
I find it odd that he would give his new girl his ex’s ring. I personally would not wear a ring my husband had given to someone else.
If I was the new girlfriend and he gave me his ex’s ring I would have said no. Lol was married & divorced and I have both of our wedding bands and my engagement ring.
If I were the gf I’d be more pissed that he “reused” a ring. Isn’t that like baduck or something?
Sorry you feel this way. However, holding onto the hurt and resentment will not do you any good. Although I would probably no doubt feel the same way if it had happened to me.
I would laugh. Honestly.
Move on material things don’t mean anything
Does she know it was yours?
Tacky.be glad you are rid of him
She should be upset too
You shouldn’t feel any type of way but she should… No way in hell I’d except a ring that was someone else’s
I can’t believe she would accept a used ring. Wrong on so many levels.
It would feel icky to me as well. And i would think it would be icky for his new fiancee
Girl your not wrong but let go and let god and yes tacky asf
That’s bad luck. They probably won’t make it to the aisle.
I don’t see how she would want it. It’s weird and I wouldn’t accept it.
If it meant anything to you I would have kept it. I would probably not like it either but honestly since you gave it back it’s his to do what he pleases and now it’s too late.
Why did you give it back to him???
Tell the girl, that ring looks better on your finger than it did mine!!
I would never flaunt a ring that belonged to an ex. That’s just me 
.
Very tacky. I feel everytime he’d see the ring it would remind him of you since you’ve worn it for years and he bought it specifically for you. Unless he hadnt put any mind to it when he bought it and just sees it as a ring. Usually you’d buy a new ring in that situation. Does she know it was yours? The idea to give it to your boys was very sentimental.
Dude. That’s weird for me. I could never imagine that being okay. It’s uncomfortable to think about. And as his new gf I would not be down for that.
Maybe she doesn’t know
You’re not wrong for feeling sad. It’s sad. Be sad and then just accept it, sounds like your processing is okay to me. I’m sorry. 
I think it’s tacky. Honestly, I would be highly offended if I was the new girlfriend too. A ring is typically chosen specifically for the person… Unless it’s a family heirloom.
She has a right to be upset that he couldn’t be bothered to get her a ring of her own.
She should b disgusted
Some men don’t think… my husband still had the wedding set he bought his ex wife and thought he would give it to me… I put a stop to that real quick lol. He really did not think of it with any type of sentimentality at all he just thought it was the perfect ring and paid $10,000 on it… I made him pawn it and buy me a cheap ring. No way I was wearing another woman’s ring.
No.
She may have reason to be upset that he gave an exes ring to her
But you, obviously didn’t accept it or returned it.
No longer your business
If you feel sad about it that’s ok, that’s how you feel. But I would try to just let it go and move on. If he wants to give her it and if she doesn’t care that it was yours that’s on them. Personally I would think she wouldn’t want that but whatever. Don’t let it get to you.
If I were her, I wouldn’t even want an engagement ring from my man’s previous relationship. Too much bad juju connected to it. I find it odd that she’s flaunting it
That is weird. I can’t believe she is okay with it and honestly after that many years it was yours to keep. You should have put it up for the boys if they wanted it. It’s a sentimental thing. I was married to my ex husband and highschool sweetheart too. We got a divorce at 25. I took nothing out of our divorce but the kids stuff and my clothes. I kept the rings and put them up for our kids just in case. I’m 35 now and no one else should have them. Just a piece of history.
If I were you, I wouldn’t care. If I was her, I’d care. 
No way I’m wearing that ring!
I would never wear a ring that another woman had worn before me. 
I wouldn’t let it bother you. You ended that relationship for good reason and even your good memories are not captured in a piece of jewelry. However, I would be sad for his new girlfriend that he didn’t think enough of her to get her something unique to her. 
It’s ok to feel sad but you’re attaching the meaning to it. Technically it’s a neutral event. He gave his girl a ring. If you can release the meaning (perhaps by telling him or journaling how it feels) you’ll be able to release all of it. And perhaps this is the universe’s way of reminding you that you dodged a bullet and something amazing is on its way
That’s bad luck if you ask me, my fiance asked if I wanted to wear his mother’s wedding dress, though it is beautiful and she was amazing, none of her marriages lasted, I feel like that’s bad luck… But that’s just my personal feelings, i mean I don’t blame you for feeling that way, not much you can do but talk to him about it, but hell if it’s already on her finger 🤷 sorry hun
I dont think your wrong for feeling how you feel but I would just let it go there must be something wrong with his fiance tho if she is ok with having to wear a ring that was yours 1st🤷♀️
Just admit your jealous and move on.
The worst part is she accepted it with open arms
I dont know any woman who would be okay with receiving another woman’s ring unless that ring was an heirloom from family.
His cheap ass wanted to be tacky 100%. I would tell her discreetly if you see her wearing the ring in public.
yeah that’s fuckin’ weird
I wouldn’t be as concerned from your side of things, Because you were given the ring and things didn’t work out. SHE ACCEPTED YOUR RING?! Imagine that! Oh man I’d hate to be her
Get over it. It’s just a ring, y’all threw the symbolism our when you ended things. She should be more upset…she got your left over lol
Yeah that just seems weird. Especially because it was a long term thing. Not like a fling he bought a ring and then handed it off to somebody he was serious about later. Haha I’d be weirded out by that…and I think that is totally tacky and not what I’d want at all in that position (hers and the other women’s). Guys are so dumb lol
I’d be upset if I found out the ring he gave me me was actually meant for someone else. To me that’s kinda tacky.
Dont worry, I’m sure she wont be the last one to get that same ring, another reason to be glad you’re not with him anymore, he could have done the obvious thing and sold it and brought a new one for her, but he clearly doesnt care, so you shouldn’t either.
She should be upset that she got your ring and not her own wth!!
I came in here before I read the entire post, to say I would tell her it was yours…but if she already knows…yuck. I’d leave them to themselves to be tacky and take the high road. You’re better than that for sure.
Bet she doesn’t know it was yours. I’d tell a bitch lol then take your ring back.
Why didn’t you just keep the ring if it meant that much to you?
You’re not wrong. She should be pissed.
She’s getting your leftovers- in more ways than one but personally I wouldn’t wear the ring that belonged to his ex. Bad Juju!
Yes, she is being tacky. Sounds like you’re lucky she has him now.
It probably wouldn’t upset me, but I see why it would upset some. I’m honestly just surprised she would accept it knowing it was intended for someone else.
I feel like there is some seriously bad mojo with wearing a ring from his previous failed relationship lol
I would think that just shows the kind of person he is and for her excepting it. I’m sure it does sting a bit at first but it seems your probably better off. Work on you and let them be them.
You didn’t marry him so legally it was his ring to do with as he chooses. Tacky in my opinion though to recycle a ring from an ex.
I wouldn’t its just a material object that also has bad memories as well as the good attached to it. The new gf is a dumbass for accepting a used ring that clearly he put no thought into. I’d feel pity and sadness for her not because I’m jealous or not happy for her, but because she’s probably not to bright since she’s flaunting a leftover ring and proud of it lmao. Sweets you win period!
I’d be more upset if I was the girlfriend. Nobody wants someone else’s engagement ring!
You shouldn’t be upset, but she should be.
She should be more pissed
It should be kept to give to one of your boys not to another women. You still wore it for years its part of your family’s pass
That’s crazy. Must not have enough income to buy a new one ,or sense
Personally… I wouldn’t wear a ring that belonged to my partners ex… does she know the background to the ring? She could be oblivious. I hope you’re ok xxx
Why would she even want it.
No… but she does lol
I think it’s sad he doesn’t care enough to get her her own ring… not one from a previous relationship
I don’t think I’d care but she should. Depends on the woman. Some accept second best and don’t mind it. I would. I don’t want an exes ring
I gotta ask why would any woman want to wear someone elses engagement ring. Sloppy seconds. I’m not petty but really. You can always trade that ring in at a pawn shop to get another ring.
I certainly would not want or flaunt a ring that his ex wore for years .just take satisfaction in the knowledge that she got an old used ring and not a new one
If it had had a band to go along with I’d be upset but since it never came to marriage then that is over and really no sentimental value at all and especially not to him if he placed it upon another woman’s hand and she must not think to highly of herself to accept a ring that once was on another woman’s finger for many years as well. You should have kept it even after the break up it was intended for you and he should have been a little more gentlemanly and bought a new ring for his new “love”. Sounds like the best thing that came from your relationship is the beautiful children you have. Let it go and be happy that you know in your heart the ring once meant that you were the love of his life and she got all the 2nds and leftovers.
After 21 years he wouldn’t have gotten the ring back. You should’ve kept the ring.
But since you gave it back to him voluntarily, you no longer have a claim to it. Now to answer your question, IMO, yes she’s tacky as hell for wearing a ring that was bought for another woman. I don’t know many women at all that would be cool with wearing a hand me down ring from a man’s previous relationship but oh well🤷🏽♀️
No. You have no right to be upset, dafuq? You broke up with him.
Ha I’d tell her. I’d be like you know that’s my ring right? What a cheap idiot
She should be mad, not you
At the very least its tacky.
I wouldn’t want an engagement ring if I knew that it once belonged to an ex. But that’s just my feelings on it.
On the other hand if it meant that much to you, why was it giving back to him? Why not of held on to it?
It’s one thing to get a ring from a pawnshop. That wouldn’t brother me.
Nope. No right at all. Move on.
What a Classy guy! LOL
I would not want that ring… unless it’s a family heirloom…
I wouldn’t be upset. I mean yeah it has good memories and you wanted to pass it down. But eh, life goes on.
But if I was the new girlfriend/fiancée I’d be pissed! Why would I want another girls ring…???
Very classless on his part. Wouldn’t be upset about it if you gave it back to him, other than the doscussion of remaking it for your guys’ children. I think it shows she doesnt mean enough to him to make the investment of a ring.
Why did you give it back ?
HAHA ARE WE LIVING THE SAME LIFE😂 My ex’s new wife wears my ring proudly. I’d be embarrassed.
Tacky af! Wouldn’t she want something of her very own? I know I would. If I’m not worth at least that to him I be damned!
You’re entitled to feel however you want. I wouldn’t care if I was you but would be pissed if I were her, lol. I would not have accepted the ring. It’s not like you were actually married for 50 years and are passing it down to the kids with any sentimental value. You left him and returned the ring. He can do whatever he wants with it it’s his.
I think she should be more upset than you. Imagine he didn’t care enough to get this woman her brb own ring. You shouldn’t feel slighted in the least.
Just tell her it was yours. Problem solved
My ex husband pawned my ring while we were still married:joy: he lost my ring for $20… just brush it off and laugh that she thinks it’s classy:joy:
You was engaged 21 years ??? Huh
Its tacky but I would be more pissed if I was her.
Ewwww she is wearing it!!! What is she crazy! I would not wear it. If I were you I wouldn’t give a damn, the ring is sour!!!
You both have a right to be upset. The ring was more than a possession. I would be upset if he used the same ring. If you were upset about the fact they were engaged at all, then it would be petty. But I feel he discounted both of your feelings in this situation. Even if he sold the old one and bought a new one for her it would be better.
I wouldn’t care its not your engagement ring anymore that relationship is over why would you be mad about that. Obliviously he doesn’t love his new finance enough to get her a new ring.
Mine did this we weren’t together as long but it’s incredibly tacky. I honestly don’t care but at first I was a little disturbed by it.
Yikes she should feel awful. Thats like giving some one a used condom. Like sure I guess you could reuse it but you fucking shouldn’t
It’s tacky on his part and I can’t fathom why this chick would want that ring but no you shouldn’t be upset about it. You should be rejoicing to be done with such a classless man.
And the next time she flaunts it in front of you I’d say”aren’t you afraid that it’s a cursed ring?” Or something like that.
Let it go. Let her inherit the ring, along with all his baggage he brings. Let it remind you of the fact the he’s her problem now. Kudos for finally breaking free.