QUESTION:
"Do I have a say in whether or not my husband goes out and buys a new truck? We JUST paid off our last truck, and today, he came home from work with a brand new 2021 freaking truck with a payment of over 900. He put over 10k down without even talking to me about it... I get I don't work and stay home with the kids and don't contribute financially, but I still feel like this is something we should talk about beforehand...He sees nothing wrong with what he did because I do not have a real job...what would you do?"
RELATED QUESTION: Am I A Terrible Person For Not Liking My Step-Daughter?
TOP ANSWERS (AS SELECTED BY MODERATOR):
"Any major purchases should always be discussed. It’s about respect for your partner."
"I'm a SAHM and me and my hubby don't spend over $100 without having a conversation first. I may not work but I am the one who pays the bills and budgets everything so he doesn't spend anything major without checking what has and hasn't been paid and what we need is taken care of before he buys things."
"I’m a sahm and don’t financially help with bills but my husband would never go and spend that kind of money without telling me… it’s called communication and mutual respect"
"Your “real job” is taken care of his kids and the house he lives in. Big purchases like that should ALWAYS be talked about. He could never do what you do and shouldn’t belittle you because you don’t have a “real job”."
"Add up your time and see how much you're really worth. Housekeeper, babysitter teacher if you home school, gardener, launderer, chef. You do work. You have every right to be annoyed, it would impact on your capacity to continue to do your job properly were he to miss payments and lose the truck."
"That is totally unfair! It is a partnership! If he thinks what you do has no value, let him stay with the kids and keep house for a couple of weeks! Better yet, call around and find out what all the services you provide would cost him if he had to hire someone to do them. Then go out and buy yourself a brand new outfit, and get your hair and nails done without telling him. It would cost a fraction of what he spent, and would make you feel a whole lot better! You deserve nice things too, and if he didn't have to ask, neither do you!"
"You do work. And when you're married, the money earned is both of yours. We discuss all big purchases; that's just showing respect for each other."
"Whether you pay bills or not it’s called respect and communication!"
"You are a team. He couldn't afford to pay you what a stay at home mom deserves. This should be a mutual decision."
"If it affects the daily life than its an issue. If life for you will continue on as normal then it shouldn't be a problem. He made a decision without you. If it doesn't disrupt your current financial situation it shouldn't matter."
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