She was left out. Call her our for being awful. Remind her that that child is part of her family and if she doesn’t like it then she loses out on all of your family. Absolutely vile 
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Obviously, it’s not the right thing to do in a situation like this. If she wanted a three generational photo to give to her parents, she could have had one done with her, her son and grandson. Then had a second photo done with your daughter included. I personally would have also had one done of you, your daughter, your son and husband as a gift. Just.my opinion.
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As a child who experienced this, it’s terrible, and can likely damage any connection she has with them in the future. She could question if she’s really part of the family and it will not go well. They are terrible for doing that.
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It is your husband who needs to defend and talk to his parents . He is responsible now of your stepson also !!
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They should have included her !! That shows they don’t consider your daughter part of their family , this is just not right … I would feel pist and rightfully so!!! Be pist demand changes or fuck your man for allowing this behavior!
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Just wait acouple of days till you feel a bit easier about it .then quietly ask in a calm voice if an error or if the child is disliked by them and let the person have a think
Let it go by telling your amazing 5 year old that they shine too bright for that family’s pictures. Take some of your own: let the 5 year old dress up, get some frames and put the best of your 5 year olds headshots up on your wall. Show both your kids they are SPECTACULAR to you. Screw that rude other family.
I have lived through this as the older kid left out of the picture, then next marriage me and my sister both are left out. This started about 20 years ago. Our mom tried to play nice for a while but one christmas was too much. The other kids were getting cars, bycycles, computers, game systems while me and my sister got stuff like toothpaste and socks. Me, my sister and mom made to sit at another table for gatherings. My mom snapped and went off one year about how wrong it is to treat us like that and the message it sends when they spend 20k on other kids then $20 on US. My stepdad god bless him also stood up for us, neither of us being his biological kids, with him having his own daughter a few years older than me. Now we are all the outcast, him included. His own daughter barely speaks to him now and this has been going on for 20 years. Its heartbreaking now that im in my 30s and understand what he went through with all this. My best bit of advice is to calmly but sternly address it in as private and small setting as you can. If you do not change this way of treating others different it will not stop and only get harder and more painful for everyone besides those who are clearly in the wrong. As time goes on they will just gain more of a foothold and feel more justified in their actions.
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She has definitely been left out !Shame on that grand mother
Let it go. And send your own gifts photos notes with cute pictures and notes written by the little one and keep sending them to great grandparents for every possible thing and date.
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If her son has accepted this child as his own, she should too. He should have been included.
That’s terrible and no one should make a 5 year old feel that way
I’d let it go. I can see it from both sides. As long as some photos include all children then I don’t see the harm with just bio photos too.
There’s no excuse for that behavior. Tell her good momma,you excetall my children or you except none. Make sure your husband knows the Rules. …
My mother in law did this, it’s disgusting. Also she took the grandkids to see the Easter bunny and left my daughter out saying “she was afraid of the Easter bunny which was total bs she my daughter never was afraid of anything like that Santa, Easter bunny sesame place characters. She is a cold hearted woman
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The way thunk is … poor people rejects expensive stuff… think of them pound land … give it a thought to ur dotty too… blow it off . They will feel Shame of it … say it in public… your dotty is limited edition… not many people will get it but ur dotty will… revenge better served cold… .
My mom bought my one daughter a princess outfit and the other a broom and dustpan. I was so mad.
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Sounds like mine. The family never claimed my 2 sons
Helps if you get the sons and daughters right if you want people to take this crap seriously
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Id be upset and so should your husband
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No she is a Kent plain and simple
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Tell her to fuck off. If she can’t include all children she can go to hell
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She should have been included.
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Your daughter is family to you, not them. They have every right to only acknowledge those biologically related. Those aren’t your daughter grandparents.
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She’s playing favorites and that will scar that little girl for life. Nip it in the bud before it gets worse. Personal experience with my own grandma. Caused a lot of hurt between her and I for a lot of years. That kinda thing can be traumatizing.
You should pick and choose your battles. Let that shit go 
sometimes that’s the way it goes
I would be upset and I would also let it be known that neither kid will be participating with the family any further with this BS. I have a half brother that his other side of the family always treated me the same. The same goes with my side of the family to him. Even to this day!
Uh am I reading this correct,you have a daughter not by him,a 10 month old by him the headliner says son 
am I missing something.?
How rude. I wouldn’t like that.
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My first experience happens to
be a total failure but I never gave up cause I knew it
was going to work out for me by trying continuously,
fortunately l’m smiling today by getting involved with
you Beckysue Lambert
Maybe they don’t think she is a grtgrdkid since she is not of blood, but rather by marriage. Happened to me many years ago with my ex’s family. Unless I am misunderstanding the relation what they did is not really inappropriate. It’s not your choice. Does your 5 yr old have grandparents from her biological father’s side? That is where your daughter’s great grandpa relations by blood would be.
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That child should have been included and the Step father needs to speak up !!
Thing is, it’s her decision. Yes it’s sad and callous, but you cannot make her feel or fo as you want. At 5 he wont understand it like an adult, so dont let him pick up on your feelings.
In time she might grow to love him as her natural grandchild, but for now, frame your own family picture and give for Christmas and let it go.
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Take it to a photo company with a picture of your child and have them include him. Not worth the hassle.
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Let it go. If it’s not “life changing” then it’s not worth getting upset!!
No it is not that big of a deal. Don’t blow it up into family drama.
That’s sad. I pray things work out.
Mother in law is just a thoughtless jerk.
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Thats so rude and mean !!
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Don’t drop it and be upset. Push the matter… always stand up for her. Once I marry you that child is apart of my family. You can’t tell my family that my son I didn’t birth isn’t their nephew/grandchild. In the future I would tell them if you can’t involve all my children go ahead and leave all my children out…thank you
My husband would’ve immediately said something… all my 6 are his but yes he should have said something
You are not overreacting
Stand up for your child. If this is a one time thing, Id say something to her and say she can either give a picture that doesn’t have any of your children in it or one that has both. If she argues, then you need to just cut contact, for both children, to protect your child. She may not remember MIL leaving her out this time, but as she gets older she will. She needs you to stand up for her and not let this happen.
If this isn’t the first time, I’d immediately cut contact. No visits, no calls/texts, ect. That’s such a horrible thing to do to a child, and will have lasting mental impact on her if you let it to continue
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I had a Grsndpa that was my mother’s step parent. He had biological grandchildren. I WOULD HAVE never known because we were all treated equally and he showed it the same. True loving grandparents wouldn’t do this. Now here is the problem are you ready to burn a bridge? If no a face to face with your husband and her for a chat about how all the kids from now in need equal love and respect and how it will make your son and sibling feel is in order.
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I couldn’t imagine leaving my daughter out of something like this. And my daughter isnt blood. But I love and will always protect her like she is my own flesh & blood. She is my world. Them doing this is NOT ok in my eyes. My mom went and got family pictures done. And in one of the pictures it was me my mom my 2 sisters and all the grandchildren. Including my daughter. They were wrong for doing this to her.
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Don’t force people to love your child. It hurts but the grandparents have no obligations to your daughter, is not their blood. If your daughter’s grandma did the same would you force her to frame pictures of your other kid too?
I’m pretty sure your daughter is already loved by her side of the family.
Now if you really care than make peace with your MIL.
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She should be accepting of your daughter. Your husband is. That should matter to the MIL. I agree with some of the other post. Try to make amends and make new family photos. It can be difficult, but in the end it’ll be worth it.
You have a right to be upset but the damage is done. What is the point, just move on.
I agree…Real Loving grandparents wouldn’t do this…my son n my kids experienced this…i met my two younger kids father when my oldest was 1 yr old…I had left a abusive relationship…we had got together when he was almost 2…but in the beginning his parents were so sweet to my son…I hadn’t noticed a change until my daughter was born…then his mom would only buy things for her leaving my son out…pick her up on weekends…usually only her…this went on for a bit as a thought well it her new grand daughter…ill get to the point…she continued this behaviour…even going as far as discussing that my partner wasn’t my oldest sons biological when my son was present…he did not know this at that time…his biological father had never been there an as far as my partner was concerned he considered himself his father…his mother was the cause of alot of hurt in my family because of her selfish actions…protect your child, is all I can say…
Don’t ket it bother u. Fuck them!
Its not your feelings anyone should be concerned about.
Your feelings for your heart broken child yes.
Kids don’t understand. People like that want to be petty and stuck up but chances are there’s a heart broken child wondering why he wasn’t good enough to be in a photo
That you have every right to be angry about.
Quick story. My brother died 8 years ago. Left behind his daughter who was two at the time. Now she’s 10.
Her mother had a baby 10 months after my brother died.
She wasted no time.
Anyways. I never liked her and still don’t. I had a lot of issues with this.
My niece lives with us during the summer and until recently I was angry my mother included her little sister.
My mother would tell me its not the little girls fault and all children deserve to be loved and not left out.
I was stubborn as hell about it.
Until the night my niece introduced me to her little sister. So proud of me and her little sister.
I couldn’t disappoint her. That’s the power of love.
Loving someone so much your feelings just go away.
Mother in law needs a strong dose of child encouragement.
If seeing those tears of a heart broken 5 year old doesn’t automatically make her take a new photo throw the whole woman away. And be rid of her. Because that would be one heartless woman.
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If they left one of my kids out they would no longer be seeing any of my kids. 
I’d never let my kids notice they were treated differently or left out.
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Why should your daughter be included, she’s not their granddaughter, she has her own grandparents to be apart of that your son wouldn’t be included in. Family is blood not just a name that can include anyone.
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To all you people saying “well, the daughter isn’t a blood relative so I can see why it happened.”
BRUH.
Family don’t end with blood.
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My EX mother in law treated my oldest son that way. He was not her son’s biological child, which was ironic since both of her children were adopted, and she treated my son like garbage and in turn my now EX husband started doing the same. He treated my oldest son different than the children we have together. Have a talk with your husband so it does not get to that point!
You have every right to be upset but quite frankly it’s not going to do you any good. Let them have their stinking picture and hang it in their home and all of its glory all they want to. Go get your own family pictures made to hang in your home and also to give to that b**** as well just so she can’t complain about it later. Beat the system. You have to show people how you’re going to allow them to treat you and yours
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I have a son that is not biologically mine but I’ve raised him since he was 18 months old…& from day 1 he has never been treated different than the other grandkids… NEVER… to me if you are in a long term committed relationship then this is unacceptable
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I was the “redheaded stepchild” growing up. Not my stepdad (who has been my only dad since I was 2). His mom and grandma. Both of my parents put their foot down and stopped doing family things altogether, until an apology was received and i was treated better. Which did eventually happen. But take it from me- the kids do notice. You’re not wrong…
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Offer to have a new photo made with them in it to counter their argument they didn’t have one.
then have a picture done with you, your husband & both of your kids & give that as a gift
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No I have been with my husband 20 years. I had my daughter at 17. His mom didn’t like my at first but they never treated my daughter any different then the other grandkids. If anything they favored her because she was the only girl. My father inlaw once asked me if me and my husband ever split if I would keep my daughter from them. I was like never. They are the only grandparents she knows.
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That’s them not accepting your oldest as their grandchild. Don’t mind what people say, watch what they do. That’s where the truth is. I’d be upset personally. Especially since you brought it up and it wasn’t corrected. Family isn’t black and white. It’s not just blood and to think so is narrow minded.
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Maybe a 3 generation thenn its all male or female
This is so sad to me… I have a stepson(4). Raised him since he was 7 months old. Technically, his father and i are not yet married. 2 YEARS AGO my sister in law made a gift for my mom with all her grandchildren and included my stepson in the gift. It meant so much to me. Family is family, not blood. You should tell them how it makes you feel with more sadness than anger and see if they have any compassion about it. if they don’t, then you’re learning something.
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I have children in my family who are not biological but to me they are my family in every way.
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Seems like they’re trying to create a multi generational picture. This isn’t about whether they like you or not. Your daughter isn’t truly a great grandchild. I feel that you’re being over sensitive & entitled. There’s no reason to be butt hurt over this.
Treating the kids differently when they can’t help how they got here is so immature. I’m quiet on most everything, but mistreating kids is something I will sound off about. #KidsNotice
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It’s the great grandparents… It’s a picture not like she wasn’t included in Christmas 
Personally I think you’re overreacting. The family dynamic wasn’t explained, if they even get to see your oldest and how often? It’s not your mother or father in law. Yes I have a blended family and a deceased baby dad with a step dad who remarried. He takes my youngest son and not my oldest. My oldest isn’t in my ex MIL pictures on the wall and never was. It never bothered me because my oldest son already has 2 sets of grandparents, a bonus Grandma, a huge family and is super loved. He understands how it works and who he’s close to. And vice versa, my 5 year old doesn’t expect me to have a picture of his extra siblings from his step dad’s wife on the wall. And they’re siblings. They didn’t leave your child out of something, just a family photo. Of their side. Makes sense to me I know I’ll get screamed at that I’m heartless now
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Speaks volumes about her. Make your own photo. Put in a card so and so ( your childs name ) wanted to send a picture. She looks and loves you as her family and wanted to send this special picture
It is never ok to exclude a child! Blood or not that baby is her family and she needs to st at t acting like it.
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Just because your husband is your daughters step father doesn’t automatically mean his parents are her step
grandparents. Does it? He made a conscious choice to take on that role but no one asked the grandparents if they wanted to take on the role? Does she not have her own grandparents? Like it’s awful to make children feel left out but if they did feel this way I don’t see that it’s unjustified ?
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I have four kids. Two I gave birth to, two came with my husband. Family pictures are all six. I would not dream of giving family on either side a picture that leaves anyone out. Frankly, it pisses me off when my older bonus daughter is ignored in favor of her little sister. I see her hurt, she does not understand why her great grandmother prefers her baby sister. It’s gotten to the point she wants nothing to do with the woman
It’s sad seeing these “not blood” so it shouldn’t matter posts. I have a 12 year old with my ex and a 3 year old with my husband. My 12 year old was welcomed into the family with open arms. My husband will say he has two daughters, and my in laws has never treated her any differently then the “blood” grandkids. She calls them grandma Deb and grandpa Tony. I’m really thankful how open they are and saddens me to see how other people can’t be that way
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I would be upset. Your husband should fix this or cut them off as it will only hurt your daughter down the line
Simple your daughter is not their grandchild so why would she be included in a family picture of their grandkids. I know that sounds harsh but I get why you’re mad I wouldn’t take it to heart. Just go get a picture some of all of you guys and send it to the people…
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Their gift, their picture. Nothing stopping you from sending a family picture to the great grandies.
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Just let it go. She seems like a nasty woman. Anyone who wouldn’t include a step child is a jerk. You’ll never change her. Don’t make a big deal out of it, so your daughter doesn’t even know about it.
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My sister’s son which is my nepfew got with a girl tht had a 2 mon. old son when they got married then she had 2 more boys with my nepfew. All 3 boys were treated the same by all of us. When the youngest boy was 1 yr old we found out it wasn’t my nephew biological son. Still tht did not change the way we treated him. It’s not the child’s fault so don’t make them feel like it is. EVER! They’re innocent ND don’t know the reasons why so show them love nd care. 
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Anyone who says it’s ok to leave a CHILD out bc they aren’t “blood family” is just ridiculous! It’s not the child’s fault that they have a blended family. And what happens when said child sees the photos that she’s not in? That’s a good way to create confusion & hurt for her, not to mention tension within the family. Good Lord.
I’d be up in some faces for sure!!
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That was done on purpose to hurt you, when she shows you the picture say " HOW NICE" With a smile on your face, no response is the best RESPONSE
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It breaks my heart that people think this is ok because she’s not their blood and he made a choice and so on. That 5 yr old is not going to understand. Thank God for my mom that has made all of my brothers children by marriage part of the family as much as her biological grandchildren. I hope it really was innocent and this doesn’t become a thing. Exclusion is hurtful. And as much as “the parents didn’t chose”. Neither did that 5 yr old. I like the special picture ideas above.
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From experience your are entitled to your own feelings but you can’t let it eat at you. You’ll just churn so much misery for yourself. It would have been nice for her to include your daughter but it was a gift she made and her call no matter how hurtful. Call her out on it see if your husband can say something to her letting her know both kids are his and should be included and then try to move on. Girl I know it’s hard it took me over 10 yrs not to feel hurt by MIL when it came to my kids but caring the hurt does nothing for you and only gives her power. It is so hard but you gotta make piece.
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I would be very upset. My husband is not my daughters father, but his family has always treated her like their own grandchild so she didn’t feel excluded for having a different dad than her brother.
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I would be upset. The child may not notice now but they will. My step daughter was loved and accepted and included in everything from day 1 when she was 1 year old. She’s 7 now and my grandma is her great grandma and she loves her very much. She feels loved and doesn’t know that she is not her blood even tho she knows she is mine. She asks to call her snd see her all the time. If she had a picture taken of just the blood grandchildren she would wonder why she wasn’t included … it can hurt the child ….but if they didn’t accept my step daughter as the same as all of my other children, (bc I treat her the same as them) they wouldn’t be around any of my children… blood or not, no excuse.
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It seems to me that the one picture was a generations picture. If she was included in the other picture you are just overthinking a little maybe.
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If she is pictured in other pictures I would not read to much into it. If you left him you and your oldest would leave and your youngest but your youngest will remain on thier lives not your oldest. Some people don’t like to form attachments right away because every situation is unknown and given she doesn’t like you much she probably thinks it won’t last. I wouldn’t read into to much she is pictured in another picture you stated so I wouldn’t be to upset over. Maybe in time y’all can get along and maybe it will last for years and she will want a complete photo.
You are overreacting.
Your daughter is not there biological granddaughter. Great grandparents are usually more traditional so this is not a big deal. You are being emotional over this bc it’s your daughter so that’s understandable but you need to think about it. Back in the 40’s -60s people stayed together for the kids so this new age blended family stuff is not normal for older people
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that’s so wrong to do that or a child
Its understandable that your feeling are hurt but your hostility is with you mother in law. You never mention how often your kids are at this great grandparents house to actually see the picture situation. Or does your 5 year old even know? Because I don’t see this bothering her as much as it is you… As harsh as it is, the people saying your daughter isn’t blood are right. Nobody else in that family besides your husband is obligated to your daughter & you want to punish them because of it. That’s stupid. She gave you a reason. She didn’t have a picture of them. Do you? && your behavior in this situation is probably why your mother in law hates you.
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A genealogy picture is of blood related people. There are some families out there that do that for the older generation and the married spouses aren’t in them either.
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If they feel like she isn’t apart of the family for a picture my son nor my daughter would be apart of that family. And if my husband had a problem he can go to his low ass mama and daddy’s house I’m so thankful I don’t have to deal with this mess and Everyone in his family knows how I feel!
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Ive gone threw this with my 14 year old an i know its childiah but i made my husband stay away from his family. But i told myself dont be like that because one day they will be judged. An i just dont let my daughter around them at all. My husbands whole family dont like me but they finally put up with me cause YA GIRL HERE TO STAY:heart:
It’s not their great grand child, why would she be in the picture? I would need to know more. Does she call them grandma and grandpa? Do they spend time with her? Does she think they’re her great grand parents? Does she call your husband, dad? Does she think it’s her dad? My daughters would not be included in a picture to my husband’s mom. They’re adults now but if we took a family picture then yes I would pass it on, like I have before when they were little but not as a specific grand parent gift. She has always been nice but my daughters don’t call her grandma, they have their own.
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Talk to your husband he should be the one to say include your daughter as family.
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Its not blood that makes a family, its love. The way I see it when my boys married their wives, they became my daughters by law. They aren’t blood but I love them like if they were. Two of them had children by a previous relationship and I love them with all my heart. Their pictures are on my wall . I’m their Grammy no matter what.
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Just do your own family photo
Being a family isn’t about the bloodline. It isn’t about who’s sperm or vagina the kids came from. It’s about who’s raising them and loving them.
Half of yall are saying " cant be mad if yall ain’t married" or “it’s understandable since he isnt bio dad” and all I have to say to that is please do not adopt. Because yall would leave that child high and dry because they aren’t from you. It’s disgusting that anyone thinks like that.
My Son and Daughter In Law are raising her 5 year old Brother. They also have a 1 year old together. I am Grandma to the 1 year old and Grandma to the 5 year old as well. I would be so upset if my kids gave me a gift with only a picture of the 1 year old. You have every right to be upset.
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Sad it happened … but from now on you send pics with your own children and for her to do this to me shows how she really feels about your daughter I wouldn’t trust her around the child… Valuable lesson …
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No you aren’t overreacting. Mother in Law sounds bitter and spiteful. She should have included ALL the children/grandchildren.
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