Do I need my husbands permission to get my tubes tied?

Please post anonymously when you have the chance, thank you. Moms, I need advice, please? I have three children, six-year-old two-year-old and a ten-month-old id like to get my tubes tied because I know I’m done having kids and a %10000 sure of it. But my husband is giving me a hard time about him not wanting me to. My question is, do the doctors need husbands okay for this? I’m in NY if that helps… Thanks in advance.

70 Likes

No your body your say ! Xx

2 Likes

Your body, your choice 🤷

3 Likes

I don’t think you would need someone else’s permission on what you should do with your body… and if you do then that’s ridiculous, I think it’s good to consult your husband on what you’re wanting to do, but ultimately it’s your choice and up to you

7 Likes

Yes. My doc had to :confused:

4 Likes

I’m in Ny & they didn’t ask my husband. However maybe ask him why he doesn’t want you to?

1 Like

No, it’s your body. But make sure your really sure.

Check with New York State Law

No you sign the paper

I’m in Texas and my daughter is 9 months, my husband had to agree and sign with me.

1 Like

Depends on where you live.

Different states have different laws. Sadly, in a lot of areas, you have to have your husbands permission.

1 Like

If he don’t want you to get your tubes tied than have him get fixed or sit down and have a talk with him and see what his reasoning are for why he doesn’t want this

1 Like

I didnt when I had mine tied

No if you dont want no more kids then have your tubes tied .i had mine tied after my 2 daughter .

My husband had to sign, and I was 31 with 2 kids and complicated pregnancy the 2nd go around, made me feel like it was his body instead of mine , but he signed for it and I had them tied

Depends on the doctor. Some have their own rules. A friend of mine can’t get hers done because she only has 2 kids and she isn’t over 30.

My sister lives in NY state too. She had to have her husband sign the form before their insurance would pay for it. So I guess if you have the money to cover the surgery without insurance you wont need his permission.

Is this a real question??? Did I miss something in my marriage vows about how my husband will decide when I’m done having kids???

5 Likes

It’s sad that it’s 2020 and women still can’t control what happens to their own bodies :woman_facepalming:

9 Likes

I had my tubes tied and a hysterectomy and I live in upstate New York I did not need anyone’s permission not even my husbands it was my decision

No unless something with insurance

Depends on the doc. Talk to them about it and see if they ask about your husband’s view on it

No. You just have to be under the weight limit (as it can cause issues), be over 28, and it depends how many kids your dr requires you to have

Not in Ohio. I was able to get it done and not need his permission.

I didn’t need my husband’s permission I’m in Illinois. And WTF? Seriously need permission?? I’d be livid :face_with_symbols_over_mouth::face_with_symbols_over_mouth:

6 Likes

Never heard of it. Had my tubes tied many years ago. Doctor or hospital never once asked if I had my husbands “permission”.

Not in Pennsylvania, I didn’t. Mine didn’t want me to either but I knew i didn’t want anymore.

I didn’t. I did have a nurse ask me if my husband agreed. He looked at her and told her it was my choice.

1 Like

I didn’t have to ask anyone when I had mine in NC

My opinion is no because it’s your body that’s what is stated to have an abortion so why not the same rule to prevent pregnancies

You don’t need permission!! It’s your body not his!!

This might be a reach, but is your husband abusive on any way? Sometimes abusive spouses will keep the wife pregnant to make it harder to leave. If he isn’t, then find a counselor you two can discuss this with. It needs to be hashed out.

2 Likes

No, but his opinion should be considered he is your husband after all and teammate.

2 Likes

If you are married both have to sign

Not sure why that would be needed at all. NOW…many states have standards about age and a wait time just to be “sure” so I am not sure about your State. If you are 22, then maybe. If you are 38…then I doubt there is any wait period.

I would contact your doctors office and ask. Some may and maybe some don’t.

I wouldn’t do it . Not bc of your husband but bc its terrible . If I could go back I’d just get the iud. Mine was so bad I had it all taken out 6 months later. And that’s a whole new set of problems .

In some states you do, in others you don’t. My advice is check the specific laws for your state.

This is a real thing? Seriously?

2 Likes

No you dont need ur husbands consent.

Get it done and carry on- probably wouldn’t even tell him

No you don’t need his permission…

1 Like

Is this even a thing!? You are your own person and don’t need anyone’s consent about what is done to your body. If you have questions though that’s something you need to bring up to your medical provider. They can’t discuss anything with your husband unless you give consent. HIPPA.

2 Likes

No he has no say in something like that

I would suggest you find out why he is resistant. Is he just afraid something will happen to you? Does he believe you will start menopause? Make sure you guys are on the same page when it comes to information and understanding. Ultimately, it’s absolutely your decision, but you do have to live with the man if he turns into a resentful ass. I would be proactive and dig into his concerns. You might end up with a supportive partner instead of someone who is fighting you.

I do not think so. The only thing asked by my doctor was if my husband would be willing to do it instead since for males it’s not very invasive. But in your case I don’t think he would be willing to. Good luck

Im not married but have 3 (I’m in NY) and the Dr didn’t care if I was married didn’t ask I was asked if I was done I said yes so we set it up

I didn’t need my husband’s permission to get it done

Privatized health care means you’re paying for a service like getting your nails done or your carpets cleaned or anything else. The fact that some doctors won’t let you control your own body is unethical. It’s not their decision, and it’s not your husbands. Your husband controlling your body… pretty sure theres a word for that too :open_mouth:

2 Likes

Well since most men won’t get vasectomies or wear condoms the fact we have to ask for permission regarding our bodies today is the most backwards and insulting thing I’ve heard in awhile. You shouldn’t have to get the ok from any human except your physician …

Ultimately it is your choice. I am really thankful to have a husband who supports me on this topic. At the end of the day he isn’t the one who has to carry a baby or give birth. It’s your body and it’s your choice.

1 Like

I didn’t think anyone needed someone permission to get something done with your own body. But you should definitely talk to your husband about it

1 Like

How would you feel if you wanted kids or more kids and he had a vasectomy without consulting with you?

13 Likes

Nope! It’s 100% your choice!

I wanted mine tied and the Dr said it was up to my husband if he could or not.

1 Like

I’m in New York and when I asked about it, I was told because I’m under 35 and have 2 girls I could potentially change my mind so I would have a hard time finding a doctor to do it for me :roll_eyes:

1 Like

It’s between you and your md

I don’t think you do anymore. That is a woman not having control over her body. I thought that was done and over with

No you don’t have to have your husband’s permission but I wouldn’t go behind my husband’s back and have it done I would tell him that I want it done don’t break that Bond of trust

1 Like

Well I tried doing it had all the paper work signed and ready to go but when my husband told the doctor that he didn’t agree the doctor said since we were legally married they couldn’t do it

1 Like

No you don’t need his permission

I know in Michigan you need your husband’s permission :persevere:

1 Like

Nope. It’s your body.

I would research ur laws bcuz in some places you dont need his consent but in others u do need his consent. Where im at i had to have his permission bcuz we are considered common law husband/wife.

yes! the doctors will not do it if he does not sign off on it! at least my doctors would not! and i had to have c-section with my kids!!

I don’t know why everyone is all fired up saying this isn’t a thing… This is a thing and you should probably use some of your outrage to make a change, instead of acting like the people who know it is a thing are stupid :woman_shrugging:

4 Likes

It could depend on your state. Unfortunately, many states do allow the husband to have control of your body.

Why doesn’t he want you to? Sounds like you both need to have a long conversation about why out of respect for each other. However I don’t believe you need his permission unless you are in a “red state” with all these new laws being passed.

No you don’t need your husbands permission. At least my Oby/gyn doesn’t ask … that’s crazy. My body. My choice

Some states do others don’t. Most doctors won’t do it if you’re under a certain age.

It’s your body… absolutely no one has permission over it but you. He’s married to you, he doesn’t own you!

I honestly have no idea, but my husband needed my approval for his vasectomy…

1 Like

Some states require husbands consent.

Ask your doctor for the paperwork and see what questions are on it.

Nope, your body; your decision. Period.

2 Likes

Do it. Your body your rules. Just wont be able to do it at a catholic hospital. Now you might have a difficult time finding a dr to do it.

womans choice the husband has no say so

I had to have my husband sign in agreement for my tubes to be tied during my C-section. I’m in NC If that matters.

My husband had to get my permission before getting his vasectomy. I thought it was kinda crazy but I had to fill out a form and everything

1 Like

Some places make you sign a form and wait two months to think on it… If you havent reached a certain age. :slight_smile: I didn’t have to have husbands permission.

Nope I got my done the after mine daughter was boring and that was almost 24yrs ago

State regulated. Though it SHOULD be solely up to you what you do with your body.

WTH, no you dont need his permission, but all you girls saying do it without his permission or it’s not his choice are what’s wrong with marriage. What if it was the other way around and you really wanted more children but your husbands made that decision for themselves and got a vasectomy without discussing it with you. You entered into a marriage and wouldn’t make much smaller decisions without agreement. Again no you dont need his consent but he should at least be included it’s his family too, unless your willing to allow him to procreate by other means.

11 Likes

Tell him to get snipped then

Depends on your state I believe… here you have to be either over 30 with at least 3 kids or married with permission

Id fight it if they told you, that you needed permission from somebody else to do something with YOUR body.
To find a doctor that will do it.

I had my tubes tied in November after I had my baby and they didn’t ask my husband if he was ok with it, the Dr just ask what was I going to do for birth control after I have my baby and I told them to tying tubes, and my husband looked at me and I told him don’t need no more baby. ( He was ok with it.) I have 2 girls ( with my ex) and my husband has 2 girls and 2 boy( with his ex) and our baby boy together

In mo I didn’t have to have my husbands permission, but he had to get mine for a vasectomy.

But if you are under 25 they rarely tie tubes.

1 Like

In kansas no. Idk about anywhere else.

Permission, no. Opinion, yes

1 Like

I talked to my SO about it and we both agreed. But I didn’t need his permission

Some of you need to watch Grey’s Anatomy and see what Dr. Addison Montgomery Shepherd did for her patient whose husband would not give permission due to religion… I realize it’s a TV show haha but the controversial episodes are based on real life events. If you are in a primarily republican state, you really should talk to some hospitals around you before acting like this isn’t a thing in 2020… It’s a thing in a lot of places across the US and world

3 Likes

In Texas you do, but I’m not sure about NY…

Do you need his permission? No. BUT I’d consult with him considering you’re in a marriage. If your doctor is saying you need his permission, I’d find a new doctor

1 Like

Yes you need his permission

1 Like

Wow I’m in New Zealand didn’t know that in the U.S.A some states require husband consent im quite shocked but I guess its there to protect his rights in some ways however it’s your body and if you already have kids then it shouldn’t be an issue

1 Like

While you don’t legally need his permission, I don’t think you should do it against his wishes. Sit down and have a serious talk and explain to him why you feel the need to have it done. This is an important decision that should be made together.

I had my tubes tied at 21 after having a boy and girl, no permission needed