Do I tell my friend or hold my tongue?

Depends. Did you see them making out, touching intimately? If so then I would bring it up. Were they just chatting? If so then no.

3 Likes

Tell her! I was made to look like an idiot because the whole town I lived in new that my ex-husband was cheating on me and no one ever told me. Even all the people that claimed to be my friends never ever told me.

10 Likes

Take a picture next time. It’s easier then being caught in a he said she said. Or potentially loosing the friend due to husband manipulating her.

9 Likes

I’d tell her what you saw and nothing more. I’d want to know if it were me and if it comes out and she finds out you knew, she may never trust you again

2 Likes

I’d take a picture and send it asking “is this your husband ?”

5 Likes

I think I would investigate first and find out what is up between them perhaps they are co-workers. Contrary to popular belief, men and women can be only friends. Do you want to potentially ruin a marriage(and likely be hated) because he was doing something with another woman that you have no proof he is doing anything malicious with?

Did you take a picture? Bc you might need proof. He’s going to lie if he was doing something wrong

I would have taken a picture and send it to her , without proof no one would believe you

I would tell my friend

1 Like

Tell her but be prepared to loose your friend in the process… unfortunately I’ve been there and they don’t always Thankyou for being told.

2 Likes

Do what your gut is telling you to do. No one in this thread will have to live with it, but you. I would tell my friend, because I wouldn’t be able to keep something like that. Ask yourself how much you value your friendship and whether you would want her to tell you if it was the other way around. At the end of the day it’s up to you. Can you keep this from her and risk losing her if she ever finds out and that you knew?

TELL HER! Why is this even a question!?

If shes a friend you tell.her

You should have taken a picture/recording, confronted him n called your friend while confronting him. She is your friend and deserves to know. Your question shouldn’t have even been a ? For us. Just tell her. She deserves to know

Take a pic so you have proof. But def tell her. I was on the other side and Noone wanted to tell me. And for anyone saying mind your business just ask yourself would you want someone to tell you?

Tell. My friends didn’t

Only tell if you have picture…very touchy situation with friends, he will lead her to believe anything and you will be friendless, it’s a hard pill to swallow all around…

1 Like

My friends knew my husband was cheating on me. They’re no longer my friends because they didnt tell me.

I would confront him. Depending on his comments, then I would tell her.

1 Like

Do what you would want her to do in this situation!

Definitely tell her wtf! Wouldn’t you want to know?

Tell her anonymously!!!

If my boyfriend or husband was cheating on me and someone knows about it ,I’d want to to know .

I would of however took a photo… just for you… dont tell anyone… its more for if he says your lying

1 Like

I’d wanna know. I’d definitely tell her.

Tell her. Nothing hurts more than finding out your friends knew and didn’t tell you. How would you feel if it was you?

As long as you could tell it was more than friends or a sister than I would expect a friend to tell me. If they get mad and don’t wanna be your friend so be it, but if they’re a true friend they’ll be glad u told them. I had a friend tell me my ex husband was cheating because she saw him with the girl that he supposedly didn’t know, and I was so thankful. I will always love her for that. I also was dating a guy and a girl that was an acquaintance told me he was trying to talk to her. We both ditched the guy and became friends with each other

So are you sure this wasn’t a family member, or a work colleague? I would just be a bit careful before you go accusing people. You may not get the reaction you think u will xx

2 Likes

Are you her friend or his? If your her friend you tell her…

Unless you have proof, DO NOT tell her.

Tell! If she’s your real friend, you will let her know her husband is a two timing skeezebag.

I would want someone to tell me so yes, tell her

If you don’t tell her, then her husband has betrayed her and so has her friend.

Tell her. I had the same thing happen to me with my ex. One of my friends sees him hugged up to a woman in the Walmart parking lot of all places, she didn’t say anything until we were divorced. Could have saved me a lot of heartache if she would have been just honest with me. It hurt that she didn’t tell me. True friends always tell, even if it hurts her. I promise she will thank you in the long run.

1 Like

If my friend didn’t tell me the second they found out I’d be out a friend and a husband.

3 Likes

Ask yourself, would you want someone to tell you?

3 Likes

I’d say it depends. What was he doing with the woman you saw him with? If they were just talking, they could be colleagues, friends or relatives. If that’s the case, I’d leave it be. Now, if it was obvious by their actions that they’re more than friends or colleagues, then you should most definitely tell your friend. If one of my friends had proof of my husband cheating, I’d want them to tell me.

I wouldn’t just jump to conclusions, maybe bring it up to her or ask if he has relatives out of state.Tell her what you saw and go from there.

1 Like

With another woman like how?

3 Likes

If it is your friend definitely tell her

1 Like

Your her friend. You tell

1 Like

Mind ur mf business :slightly_smiling_face:

1 Like

What was he doing with the other woman? Did they look like they were together or supm? U can’t just see two people together and start assuming

3 Likes

Tell her. But don’t push her to act. And be there for her when her life crumbles. I would’ve went up to him and said something right then and there, personally… But 🤷 I mean, it’s your friend

3 Likes

What were they doing? Is it a coworker, a client? Just seeing him with someone means nothing?

2 Likes

U ain’t no freind if u don’t tell her

4 Likes

Better to cry with the truth than smile with lies.

It can cause issue with ur friendship if she is not ready to hear it. But She should be told. Not one wants that done to them. The worse thing is she gets mad at u and quits talking to u until she finds it out herself

I’d tell her but my question is did you catch them in the act of being inappropriate? My husband of 20 years has female friends and I trust him even when I don’t trust them.

1 Like

Girl code. Spill. Just don’t push her to make a decision.

2 Likes

Tell her, absolutely

1 Like

If she’s a friend yes

Hope you took a photo for proof…

Are you sure it’s not a work colleague or client…

If you are sure tell her & be there for her…

Im sorry but the narrative “mind your business” is ridiculous and dangerous.

4 Likes

I would want to know but be prepared to lose the friendship because if she doesn’t leave him he will make sure she leaves you.

1 Like

Tell her. And the ones telling you to mind your business 9/10 are homewreckers. I said what I said, won’t do no good to even argue with me about it

5 Likes

It is a double betrayal if she finds out you knew and she was the last to know.

Well, what exactly did you see though? He travels for work, right? If you saw them kissing,etc, yes, I would tell her. If you just saw them together having lunch,walking,etc, mind your business and don’t say anything as she could be a colleague.

3 Likes

Go up to him and say hi. Then call your friend infront of them. Even take a picture

With another women like holding hands, ect or just with another women. Huge difference

1 Like

Not your monkeys, not your circus

1 Like

I’d ask him about it first.
Seriously, it could have been nothing or everything.

1 Like

As long as u cool with not being friends anymore. Tell away.

I’d speak to him first and casually ask who his friend was and gauge his reaction. Tell him he may see it as none of your business but his wife is your friend and if he doesn’t either stop or sort things out at home the. You will tell her. See what he says

This is the thing. People always jump to conclusions. He may have been on a business lunch or having lunch with a friend. The friend may already know. It is not always cheating.

On the other hand you can tell her and lose her as a friend or she may lose someone she cares about.

2 Likes

If it was me I would want to know. She’s ur friend tell her. It’s never ok to cheat.

1 Like

She could have been a coworker …. I’d ask the husband before I upset my friend with something that could be innocent

1 Like

If you’re her friend why would you ever hold your tongue with something like this??? Even if it is harmless, you still tell her.

4 Likes

I mean was it an inappropriate situation? Work dinner? Client meeting? So many variables here. I have male friends, I have often had lunch with male coworkers or friends. One of our mutual friends will call my husband and tell(ask) him he’s taking me to lunch. I would say something but less in an accusatory way and more like “oh yea I saw (husband’s name) the other day” And then go from there. You might be surprised to find she says something like “oh yea he and so and so had lunch etc” I’ve been in a position where someone told my husband they saw me with another man. and my husband was very well aware I was there and who I was with. :woman_shrugging:t4:

1 Like

How about this get proof like a photo of them kissing holding hands and such then tell her with evidence

Tewhat would you want? Tell her… if she’s really your friend yall should have no issues. If it was nothing she should already know about it and no issues. If it’s something she didn’t know about it and it was innocent (&they have av healthy relationship) she should be able to talk with him with no issues… basically the only way I see an issue is if he was doing something wrong

Next time you should walk up to them and be like “hey, how are you?!” Then introduce yourself to the woman as being his wife’s best friend. See their reactions. And tell your friend you ran into her husband and his friend and start dropping hints about it being a female.

8 Likes

Oh hey we women need all the support we can get. You’re questioning whether or not you should tell your friend you saw her husband with another woman, why are you wasting precious time get a hold of her pronto and tell her. Let’s put it this way if your friend knew your husband was seen with another woman would you want to know, I know I would. Don’t second guess yourself tell her asap she has every right to know.

2 Likes

If you guys are good friends I’d tell her! If she is just someone you know and are not close with then I think of still tell her.

1 Like

Would you want to know?
Would you be upset if she knew and didn’t tell you?

Was he out for dinner or was acting intimate? Last thing you want to do is cause drama when it’s not warranted. If that’s the case you cause trouble in the relationship. Cause emotional stress in the kids (if there is any). & Cause your friend to trust you less. You better be sure what you saw before you go ruining a family.

2 Likes

If she finds out you knew & didn’t tell her… Whew.
I’d talk to him first.
He tells her or you will.

7 Likes

Women always jump to conclusions. :roll_eyes::roll_eyes::roll_eyes:

1 Like

I would have taken a picture just incase and told her.

3 Likes

If it was you would you want someone to tell you?

2 Likes

I would talk to him first and see what he says.I wouldnt go running to tell her right away.

Please keep us updated!!:sweat_smile:

2 Likes

Saw him doing what with another woman? Men and women can be platonic friends. Perhaps keep an eye on them; if they aren’t all lovey-dovey then I don’t see a reason why you should cause unnecessary drama in your friend’s relationship. If he’s clearly cheating, though, tell her.

2 Likes

How is this even a question? Friends don’t hide stuff like that from each other.

8 Likes

Do you know the whole story? Have you asked him? If not, do those things first.

Mind your own business

Your times passed Ida walked straight up to them find out the situation… but you need to tell her and let her question him

1 Like

Depending
On what kind of
Friend you are. Take video to get proof. Just incase She doesn’t believe you.

Depending on his work could it have been a meeting, find out first but if you know he’s cheating then tell her

Tell your friend dear as I am going trew the exact same thing but husband had an affair with a ex of him he had 16 or 17 years ago I found out last month he is having an affair and quest what his family is saying I’m the reason

1 Like

I personally would want to know but when it was my best friend’s husband cheating and I told her about it, it ruined our friendship. She didn’t believe it and said a lot of mean and hateful things and even after she found out the truth, she was still mad.

4 Likes

You could ruin their marriage if hes simply having dinner with a colleague.

1 Like

Would you expect your friend to tell you? What ever your answer to that question is. Is the answer to this one. Treat people how you want to be treated.

3 Likes

Tell her! She deserves to know

1 Like

Would you want your friend to tell you?

1 Like

Maybe it’s business related. Maybe it’s a friend. Just because he’s with a woman doesn’t mean he’s cheating. Keep out of it

3 Likes

I would have walked up to them an ask how’s your wife? Then I’d call her 🤷🏼

2 Likes

I woulda taken a pic and told her within few mins of seeing them. And would expect my friends to have my back the same

Tell her !!! Even if it’s nothing, she deserves to know and talk with her husband about it

I’d tell her anonymously. If she finds out and chooses not to share, then she doesn’t want anyone to know or judge her. If she leaves and is thankful to whomever, you can be more forthcoming.
If she stays with him, that’s her decision but this/he may drive a wedge in your friendship.