Do people ever change?

Wow, sounds like you enjoy being a glutton for punishment. It’s painfully obvious he’s been cheating this whole time and is sorry for only getting caught. Not sure where you live have friends or family that can help with the kids. But you need to get your ducks in the row kick him out and get him for everything you can manly child support and alimony. Many people will say go find a new guy blah blah blah, before you do get your stuff together and wait till your kids are able to defend themselves, keep in mind there are many people out there who prey on women with child. I’m old school cause I strongly believe your life belongs to your kids after all they didn’t ask to be born so they should always be put first. I wish your able to find the answers in these comments. Love yourself and be a mother your kids can look up to and admire.

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I know this may be terrible advice but it worked for me lol. If you can become a stripper work part time I was a stay at home mom for years with no way out and stripping helped me do it. On top of that I felt sexier then ever worked a couple days a week and stayed home with the kids the rest I loved it. It does get exhausting though. I eventually got the job I always wanted. Dancing just help get out of that toxic relationship a long sooner and best news the law is on your side cause it’s totally legal :sweat_smile: my ex thought hilarious any who.

My husband used to talk to girls in the beginning of our relationship, even while I was pregnant, in labor, and after the kids were born. He has changed, now he will tell me if he talks to any female (even friends of his or mutual friends) I don’t expect him to tell me, he does it on his own. People can change, but from the sounds of it, he DOESN’T want to change. My husband and I have been together 10 1/2 years and married for 2 1/2 years.

I was in the same position! LEAVE!!! It’ll be shit initially, but months will go by and you will feel like a different person! Please think about yourself.

R u kidding me?! Go find other guys to flirt with and rub it in his face too smh idgit

My daughter’s ex husband would chase anything in a skirt. He would slip around to meet them and lie to all of us. They never change, once a cheater always a cheater

People can change, but he has clearly shown you he isnt going to. He has no reason to. You continually let him treat you like you have no value. Time to leave and dont go back. Might need therapy to handle feelings but he doesnt deserve you.


He has done it multiple times and he knows you will stay. People can change but he is only sorry when gets found out!

This is a clear pattern and you need to reevaluate your situation and relationship. He obviously is going to continue doing what he’s doing and he does not care for the relationship the way you do

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Will he change? No he won’t he has NO reason to, he did it once YOU forgave him, he did it again YOU forgave him, he got away with it both times so YOU have told him it’s ok to treat ur relationship like it don’t matter


Wow, you deserve better. What will make you go? Because your kids deserve better too. Someone will love you the way you want. Be strong mama I know it’s not easy… but you deserve the world mama

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Obviously people don’t change, I would leave

I feel like you are love and he is joe.

Did this girl really just ‘move’.


Hmm tbh CERTAIN people can change. But I don’t think your guy falls into that category. He’s chased women for a long time

I think that people can change but only if they really want to…

He can’t do those things for you but can for random girls; yes, that one hurts. People CAN change, but they rarely do. The fact that he has done the EXACT same things multiple times says he will likely do it again. Also, if he was changing, he would understand your hurt and hesitancy. Since he still can’t accept his part in all of this, it is unlikely that he’s changed; he simply hasn’t found his next girl yet. He should understand that he hurt you, and it will take time for you to trust him. Forgiveness doesn’t take away the hurt or the hesitancy. Trust is earned, and he lost it, so he has to prove he can be trusted. However, I think you’re better off leaving at this point.


Well I can answer your question with a question. Has he changed yet? Been 10 years and no change? Yeah I was in a similar situation (not married) difference is I only let it go for 3 years then decided I was done.


You don’t have trust issues. You have a cheating sex pest husband.

They are two very different things.

People can change when they make a mistake- a mistake is a one time thing repeated behaviour is a choice he is making a choice no he will not change


Oh hun, you deserve so much more! Have some respect for yourself and kick him out! He can spend his money on child support instead of other women! Good luck dear!


Some do change but he clearly doesn’t!! He’s having his cake and eating it and tbh no you don’t have the right to those feelings if you continue to set yourself up time and time again!! Stop being the martyr, stop being the victim and letting yourself be treated this way. You are worth far more. Send him in his way and as he works, go to court to sort child support and refuse him back in your life relationship wise, he only needs to be in your childrens lives and yours to make arrangements with them


I would say his pattern of behaviour proves cheaters don’t change.


I’m sorry but leave his ass in the dust. It’s a no for me.

He ain’t gonna change girl, he knows he can get away with it. You need to change and boot his ass out the door

You keep forgiving him so he won’t change he doesn’t see any reason to

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Also having a five year old idk if it’s a girl or a boy but they are seeing that example even though you may not think they no they do and especially if you have a boy he will think it’s okay to hurt woman over and over and they will take you back you have to stand up for yourself and fight for what you deserve. Let him go and find what makes you happy. Set an example of a happy mom your kids will love you for it.

Nope he’s not gonna change and he doesn’t care about you or even love you just leave him alone

No, he’s fcking you over and you’re letting him. You’re giving him the life of he can mess you about as much as he wants and you won’t do anything about it. Not only that but your kid will learn from this behaviour, your kid is witnessing you being treated like shit and thinks that’s okay. Get out and never go back.

You teach people how to treat you.

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All I’m gonna say is how many times is he gonna cheat on you for you to leave him? He keeps doing it because you keep taking him back….

Take it from me and leave. I forgave my now ex husband (2 kids) many times… until he came and told me that he got my best friend pregnant… almost 10yrs marriage/12yr relationship… if he hasn’t changed by now he’s probably not going to. He wants his cake and to eat it also.

You need to leave and then find a good therapist, work on yourself, you’re damaging your kids psyche for the rest of their lives. Don’t let them grow up thinking this is normal or healthy… it isnt

Why are you with him,he will keep doing it.Be brave leave .He will never change

Once you forgave him for cheating the first time, then the second time and ect, he knew he would have his cake and eat it too. He just feels entitled to do whatever he wants to with no consequences or any respect for anyone else. Self Gratification . It’s all your choice with what you choose to do also. You either leave or stay with him , who has a serious issue of being a cheater. Best wishes. Just know that you deserve to be happy and that you are capable of always being lovable also.

People. Don’t. Change. EVER!
He doesn’t love you or he wouldn’t do those things to you. You deserve better etc etc etc

Once a cheater, always a cheater from my experience. You deserve better.


He has no respect for you, & he sounds very pathetic, I would leave him, you deserve to be completely happy.

Your letting him get away with it and he knows you’ll forgive him every time. No people like that fo not change people who say they do are clearly covering there own backs. He will keep doing it he wants to have a house to come home to and to still act single. Let him be single


Some people change some don’t.

People do change but he has shown you his pattern so I doubt he will. It’s up to you on how long you want to continue being a door mat. Be an example for your children


Get rid :grimacing: he’s using you until something better comes along

Oo no girl they don’t got out

he doesnt respect you and knows youll stay no matter what. id leave and find someone worth while

You got one red flag :triangular_flag_on_post: why stay and collect them!! Now it comes down to your self worth…


Your question was do ppl ever change?
Why should he. When u lay down like a doormat and allow him to walk all over u? He is a liar and a cheater and u already know all of this. U continue to stay, why complain about it when u obviously like being treated like crap. Get some self esteem and self respect and drop this loser. Find yourself again and enjoy life.


He’s not gonna change sweetie… Run!

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No Honey, they don’t

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Be brave sweetie. You need to leave him!

Get a job and move on

People do change but his behaviour is inappropriate.
He needs help

Sadly he won’t change. Even he doesn’t know why he behaves the way he does. He doesn’t have any legit reason. This will always be something you’re going to have to deal with, being with him. There is nothing abnormal about having trust issues. Forgiveness isn’t forgetting what someone has done, it’s giving them chance after chance, despite the fact they have hurt you and disrespected you. You can’t ever forget what he has done. If he had done it once and never again, then I might be easier to let it be a thing of the past. He is the one that did it over and over and over. You can’t move past something that you constantly have to worry about. HE put HIMSELF there. Not you. He has to live with the consequences of his actions. The fact that trust now doesn’t come easily to you. Plus forgiveness shouldn’t be given, it should be earned. He should be doing everything within his power to show you that you can trust him. History says he will keep doing this. You most likely will never be able to trust him. That’s on him. He did that to your relationship. He has to live with that.

People change sometimes
But he’s a dog and probably wont

Your hurting yourself and your poor child has to see u hurt for a scumbag. Leave it’s possible. Think of what he could be taking home to you n your child

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People change, just not this one.

He’ll never change. You need to get away from him.

Nope. He won’t change. You need to get out and stay out. He doesn’t care about you or your feelings because he wouldn’t be putting you through this. I speak from experience. Prayers.

You already know what you need to do. Get your ducks in a row and go.

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I have been there and he will keep doing it! Run now!

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Counseling or review yall relationships

He’s still got his options open, u should too

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I also believe he likes the chase, he won’t put effort like that into you because he already has ties to you but will whisper sweet nothings to keep u each time he’s caught.

People do not change. Just move on.

He will change only when he is ready. Go on with your life without him. Don’t be surprised when he chases you once you evolve

Ok didn’t read it all, but your husband is cheating from what I read, give him a choice, but changes are, he will continue to cheat, And what does boba mean???

Well look at you. The queen of forgiveness. You might as well have given him a free pass to cheat on you. Do you enjoy his actions telling you over and over that you don’t matter to him? Do you enjoy knowing he is trying over and over to cheat on you? Well you get what you settle for. Oh you have kids with him…? Well then forgiving him over and over makes sense, right? Yeah NO. Why are you venting this nonsense? Either pull up your big girl panties and live with your unfaithful man. Or get your shit in order and get the hell out of there. There’s no big mystery here. He’s not gonna change. He’s not gonna decide he loves you and only wants you. This is who he is. Your forgiveness changes nothing. Either be okay with it or decide this bullshit isn’t what you want and move on. Simple.

Bless your heart, this sounds very painful and exhausting. I do not see this man changing at all. However, it is up to you if you want to stay with him and let him control you this way or if you are going to be tough and leave him and give yourself and your children a much happier life that isn’t based completely off of him. I have been here. It’s tough but gets better with time. It’s more than possible. Start looking for jobs, daycares, apartments now and have absolutely everything planned out before you leave. If not your success rate will be at an all time low! Make sure you and your children have everything you need in your new place before you leave. Stay with him until you have all of this figured out. Stay single and focus on yourself and your kids. I wouldn’t immediately look for a rebound or another man just yet. Let the right one find you!!

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Absolutely not and he’s made it pretty clear he has no intention of changing. Get a job, get rid of him and live your best life. No one deserves to feel like they aren’t good enough

They don’t change! They say they will to shut us up. But they don’t change. I went through the same bs! Twice !


Do the stripes on a zebra change? You know your answer….


Have some respect for yourself!!!

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I mean this is In the nicest way possible, if he hasn’t changed In the 10 years that man is never gonna change. You can’t stay in a relationship just for the kids.


Seems like a pattern in his behavior. He isn’t sorry and will keep doing it. You better start saving everything and document all texts and numbers for court. Get you shit together and leave or make him leave and get divorce or separate and take him for child support.

If he was really sorry he would change for you but evidently he dont care enough about you. I would tell him it’s me or the door. I dont share and mean it. I DO NOT SHARE


Im just curious why 11 freaking ppl laughed at this girl… Smh despicable


You need to take care of yourself and leave he doesnt care nore will change for you.

I think you should leave him. Get a job and leave he sounds like a shitty man

Once a cheater always and a liar

Hes only got you around so he does not have to pay support. Your wasting your life and you are enabling his behavior. He will never change and with your mindset you won’t either. Your only helping continue ruin your life over a worthless sack of sh*t. You want a life then you need to get one.


Think he’s proved he’s never going to change. Respect yourself and your children and leave for a happier life.

Get a job and some self respect, let him GO.

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Yes, people can change. It’s he one of those people? Probably not.

People can change if they want to my husband was a functioning alcoholic when we got together and I was a big drinker then to but I woke up one morning feeling like death from a hard night of partying and said nope im done this isn’t who iam and it’s not who I want to be I quit that day my husband didn’t at this time we weren’t married I left told him he had a choice to make but he couldn’t have both of us he stopped drinking that day we have been married for 17 years together 20 and it’s like this why would he change for one there’s been no consequences to his behavior so like a kid that never gets in trouble they will continue to do the same behavior because there’s no consequences to his behavior he has a mindset of I can do whatever I want because at the end of the day she isn’t going anywhere so until you show him and I mean show him he has list it all and not for a week either he needs an eye opener if he can’t put in the work to get you back then he isn’t worth anymore of your time hunny quit allowing him to abuse you like this you are simply the one at home washing his clothes and cooking and cleaning for him while he is whining and dining some other chic not today get a job if child is school age get a job during school hours and be your own person


I quit reading after he cheated on you for about the third time. I try to be supportive of your situation. I can only advise to get yourself a job and kick that guy to the curb. You deserve so much better. Never look back. Good Luck

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He doesn’t love or respect you. Here are your options, deal with it and quit complaining about because you are allowing this to happen. Or have some self respect and boot his :peach: out. P.s. he DOESNT WANT to change, you want h to change but he doesn’t want to.

Why should he change when u have tolerated his behavior for this long? People only change if they want to. Your husband has no intention of changing his behavior should tell u that. People only treat us as badly as we allow them too. And I don’t believe u have forgiven him his past cheating otherwise u wouldn’t be feeling like u do forgiveness is not for him it’s for u so u can move forward and u obviously cannot move forward from this and the way u feel. He is a cheater plain and simple now u have to decide if u can live with that or not. I hope not and that u move on for yourself for him and your child.

u have every right to feel how you feel. mine used to talk to his exes, i or up with bs for 6 months twice. and he cheated with our neighbor when i was pregnant.

over the last 2 years I’ve seen so much in him that has changed so yes its possible if he really wants to. it’s just up to you if you wanna stick it out if you really think it’s worth staying. … get yourself into therapy. work on the trust issues. which Ik is super hard. very into therapy. itll help alot. my husband and i have been together almost 8 years. i didn’t leave cause i didn’t wanna throw away 6.5 years of my life. :woman_shrugging:t2:

In my experience… they don’t change


Sometimes I wonder if these are serious posts


People can change but unfortunately if u allow this behavior he will keep doing it… he knows you will forgive him and come back so why change? Me and mine have been together since we were 16, 30 now… and I’d leave for good if I caught him doing that… ur showing ur kids it’s A ok for you to be treated like that and B for people to act how he is… Nothing will change until you change how you deal with this… good luck!


People usually, about 99% do not change with the behavior your partner is doing. I know you have kids with him, but you should leave now. Just pack up your kids and
leave. No more words. Leave!

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Wow, kick his ass out. He doesn’t care about how you feel at all. Once a cheater, always a cheater. He already proved it multiple times that he wasn’t changing.

Therapy for both of you. Both individually and together. He has some shit he needs to figure out.

Sad. He won’t change. He’s had many chances but gets away with it so no

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He won’t ever change….
Know your worth!
Get out it will keep happening because you let him get away with it.


People do change. But only if they WANT to. He doesn’t want to. He has told you so repeatedly. Either accept the cheating or move on without him.

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Nope. This is your life. I don’t know if you just want to keep getting disrespected forever and sooner or later when you are “too old” he will have found a younger, naive person to move on with. You will be alone with trust issues that will ruin every relationship you may try to have because you have passively accepted his behavior and believe there is no choices for you. No man is better than this destructive man.


I’m gonna say sometimes yes people change. But in this situation it sounds like he has no intentions of changing


People change for WHO they want to change for and its blaring signs that its NOT you! He has shown you time and time again.


No they don’t change after throwing away 10+ years of my life I’ve learned that don’t change.

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If you’re willing to accept that he doesn’t have an ounce of respect or love for you, by all means stay with him. If it were me, I’d throw the whole “man” away. Respect yourself enough to say enough is enough. Your kids are watching you