I’ve been thinking a lot lately about addressing certain situations in the future for my son. Dating, sleepovers, having girls over, I was always raised pretty strict. No dating rules and I ended up hiding my first boyfriend in 8th Grade… My parents had to be in the same room with us even in high school… Overall I was a good kid but thinking back, I did hide a lot of things I shouldn’t have had to. I want a strong amount of trust between my son and I, how much freedom is too much? Sorry this is long. Do you think strict parents cause sneaky kids?
Absolutely. Mine hide such small things bc they dont want me to overreact as I have done in the past. Trying hard to get it right with the last two. But its a fine line bw strict and too lenient.
You can be strick and still be open with your kids make sure they know that they can come.e to you and talk about things … I’m strict myboldest is 14 and as I am not her friend but her mom we are pretty close and she doesn’t hide alot from me… but still knows I have stricter rules but if she comes to me with a good attitude and talks to me about a rule we have that maybe she wants to bend we make comprises to where she feels she still gets a say and still understands that I have rules and they need to be taken seriously… but compromises are ok as a parent. Talking to your kids and not at them all the time really helps as they feel they are being heard and not just told
No… I have 1 that was super sneaky, 1 mildly sneaky and one that just tells the truth because she watched the other 2 and saw if she was just honest things would be easier… I wasn’t hard on them but I had rules… If you respect the rules I can offer leniency but if you try to play me like I wasn’t a teen once upon a time, you’re going to come up short Everytime…
Yes they do and I was one of them. Me and my kids are very open
It all boils down to how much trust you both have in each other. The more trust the less strict a parent has to be. My kids tell me pretty much everything, even extremely hard things, because they know I will listen and not freak out. We still have rules and they are followed otherwise there is a well defined consequence. I don’t make up punishments on the fly.
Sure do i was raised in a very strict house and rebbelled so much
I say it depends on the kid. Some kids need strict rules and some don’t. I was closer to my parents because they always trusted me unless I gave them a reason not to. Trust goes both ways.
I think If you stick to choice based parenting and teaching them that you trust them to make good choices, congratulate them when they do and help pick them up when they don’t it takes away all reasons to sneak anything. Level 3 boy moms 2 cents
Yes. My parents were super strict and it just taught me to be more sneaky and careful of not getting caught
Strict and overbearing are two different things. You can be strict without being overbearing. Being overbearing and having poor communication skills will ABSOLUTELY cause sneaky kids.
My mom was not super strict but I still hid tons of stuff from her. I think part of it is being a teenager and the other part is the relationship you have with your child.
Most of the kids I grew up with had hella strict parents and they were the sneakiest bunch I ever knew lmao
My son and I have a very good relationship he’s always be upfront with me and comes to me for everything…sometimes a little tmi lol but I trust him and he’s had girls over in his room at the age of 13 till now 18…and respects my house …he’s always went out with friends and followed curfew and he still follows a curfew but I let him stay later every once in a while but I taught him to make good choices in life and he’s leaving for the marines in about 4 weeks…so I think I did pretty good…so trust your gut and do what you think is best nonparent is perfect
My philosophy with my kids: don’t put your kids in a position to lie to you and they won’t! I was, by all accounts, a strict parent and I made it a point to talk to my kids about EVERYTHING!!! I also started when they got into their teens letting them make their own decisions- within reason. I didn’t have a set curfew, instead I asked them how late they thought they’d be, they’d say 10 then you better be through the door at 10 or else. Both my girls graduated with honors, we never had any major issues, and they’re strong capable women. The key, in my opinion, is the talking!!! Talk about everything with them so they know they can come to you with anything!
As long as my son’s behave in a manner that garners trust the more they’ll be trusted. Do things to abuse that trust I’ll take away priveleges. Abuse my trust I’ll start searching your phone and I’ll sit a few seats behind you at the movies. Do something in violation lose the priveleges earn it back, gain them back. Trust is earned not given.
I wish my parents had been more strict. If they had I wouldn’t have had ended up in a bad relationship. I have 6 kids. 20 in the army, 19 we kicked him out because lazy refused to work or go to college, 17 in high school. 13 12 and 11. We have open communication. We have discussed sex drugs you name it we talk about it often. We never set curfews for them. They know what we expected . Meaning be respectful, we need to know where you are. If you leave one place for another I need to know. Do drinking. But if you do please call we will pick you up. No questions asked. Just be responsible. The 3 older ones all boys. Never tested us. They did as expected. Our 17 year old who is still home. Homeschos and works full time. Has an amazing girlfriend. She has stayed over a few times. He gives his bed to her and all the boys camp out in livingroom. They are waiting till marriage. I let them make their own rules. But I put boundaries in place. They never let me down. The same will apply to the younger 3 when the time comes. I do think they will try me. Do what you feel is best. Be open about everything. My older son tells me everything. Things he probably shouldn’t with me being mom. But I listen. I give advice and never shy away from any topic. Its hard. They might totally screw up or they might totally be great. Trust your gut and trust that you taught him good morals and values. Oh. Lots of praying. Lol. Now is when the real worrying starts.
I was raised with a lot more trust than than I should’ve and knew it! When my mother and my girlfriends mother allowed me to spend time together I felt that I had to respect that privilege and never did more than Kiss her .
Yep. I’m in my 30’s and there’s still stuff my mum would be horrified about if she knew.
Every kid that I’ve known that has had strict parents became very rebellious during highschool, and once they hit college, oh boy did they hit the rock wall. Half of them dropped out, other half drinks every night, but hey it just depends on the kid. Not everyone will turn out that way! Best thing is to just talk to your kid and really see their point of view and yours. It’s always good to have some balence with authority!!
Yep! My kids are pretty upfront with me. I’m sure they have secrets, and have done stuff they haven’t told me about… But not too much. Just stay within reason. Talk to them about why you don’t want them to do certain things. Don’t tell them they can’t. Understand and constantly remind yourself that they are children. Not little adults. Remember how hard it was being in the preteens / teenage years. How much that heartbreak hurt… How it felt like no one understood you. How you just knew you were being overly emotional but you couldn’t help it. And go from there. The fact that you’re already thinking about this is the first step to a positive relationship.
In my case it definitely caused a sneaky kid… who still hides stuff to this day that I have no reason to hide.
“Strict” no. Unavailable for open communication? Yes.
If you wanna set some boundaries with your kid, sit down and talk them out and set them together. Communicate with with them. Let them communicate freely with you, without any threat of punishment or negativity.
My mom was pretty strict when it came to boys. So I learned early on how to be very sneaky and get away with just about anything. I want my kids to have more trust then my mom had with me. I remember what I was capable of hiding. So I’m shooting for a more honest open relationship with them.
Strict parents 100% cause sneaky children.
So i knew about sex from the age five because of foster kids I became active at 14 my min out me on bc and had condoms around for boys and my brothers always have condoms on them as well we told here no big deal but we were put in it is that made it impossible for things to happen but also keep in mind it may not be just girls it could be a boy just thinking out liud there but have the talk and make sure they are protected
Open and honest relationship. Means listening,
You have to have a good medium. We had crazy strict over bearing dad and yes everytime we got to go out rules were broken. Not to be crazy but because they were either ridiculous or it was to make the most of what little freedom wed gotten. We could barely go to school functions let alone hang out with friends. It got so bad we didn’t even have friends because we were never allowed to go anywhere. Everything was a major problem. 1 minute late. Forgot to make a bed. Got a C ( my sister lol) looked at someone funny and we were in trouble.
But too much leniency and they dont learn consequences … like my youngest sister… he ended up going the no rules route with her and she was a mess.
It comes down to trust as well, raise them to trust you and vise versa so that they can have freedom and still accept your boundaries as well.
It’s working well with 4 yr. Old he knows the rules and his boundaries and the consequences of breaking them. Honesty always results in lesser punishment as well.
If you have a TikTok Check out @BillyVSCO
He is amazing and covers a lot of these subjects in a positive way! I’m definitely playing a bit of my parenting off his methods
So a strict parent is a parent with many restrictions. If you restrict your children from a lot of things, you should be able to communicate your reasons to your teen such as your experiences and why you would want to protect them from certain situations. Some parents I do believe are too strict when it comes to snooping. Now if you’ve caught your child in dangerous activities, then of course you monitor but there are some things we as parents don’t need to know. Once your child says they want to date, there is no reason you should say no. all you can do is monitor them at that age. Restrict being out alone, late, etc. My mother was criticized for letting me date at 13, particularly by a specific coworker. Guess who’s daughter needed up pregnant at 15? not me and I don’t mean this as a snub, just an example that if your teen wants to do something, they will find a way. A friend of mine’s mother was so strict that she did not allow her daughter to go to any friend get together, only mine and she sat next to her the entire time. My friend had 4 kids young and cut out most communication with her mother. I also believe that we are careful with our kids and don’t want them to go through what we went through. Specific rules I agree with. Suffocating your child so they won’t make any mistakes will hinder them from knowing that mistakes can and will happen and they can learn from them without being shamed and become independent confident functioning adults. Either way, we are doing the best we can and the fact that you are asking shows you are a great mother to be concerned and trying to accommodate both yours and your child’s best interest.
Strictness is not the problem in my opinion, trust and respect between parent and child is important… You can be a strict parent but you need to be able to listen to your child if they feel differently about something they want to do and your child should feel comfortable to talk to you about anything… As long as there is a comfortable relationship between parents and child, the child being able to speak to you about anything that’s all that matters…
I say give them the trust the deserve till they give you a reason to not trust them. 6 kids between my ex and I. I am still the one they come to good bad or ugly. I am open about things and want them to be open with me. Id rather know what they are doing and be there to help them learn from it.
Im fairly relaxed parenting. Im firm, but fair.
Set Boundaries building TRUST and being open and honest relationship is key but also letting your child have a voice so they have the respect to you and to themselves so no lies have to happen.
Kinda in certain situations I would say yes it can cause sneaky kids but it all down to what u want them to learn
I’m very respectful and open with my kids and they are very respectful and open with us, we have never been strict just open and honest, we have rules and consequences and they know that, but if we as parents mess up or get it wrong I expect my kids to tell us as well.
Trust me your parents knew about everything you did. Try being honest with your son. Tell him you are trying to protect his heart.
I was brought up pretty strict and I didn’t sneak around or do sneaky things
An open platform and education is all you can do . Yes boundaries and expectations are required . But it’s how you handle there screw ups is how they will feel coming to you , just remember you can’t be there “friend” at times if they don’t respect you .
Yes , cause I was raised by Christian parents and anything that wasn’t religious was never discussed so hence I had to experience it and then never a safe place so if going thru something or questions I had to live it out or keep it a secret or be ashamed to ask , so being gay knowing at early age then being told going to hell then addiction kicked in and then other things long story short home should be a place of love communication and boundaries heathy ones . Cause they will find a way to do it so at your place or in the streets it’s a fine line
Depends on the kid. My brother was a hellion. I listened and tried to be good. We’ve both got issues we’re working through now lol
I was a hell raiser as a teenager make sure u have open Communication and if u start seeing certain bad behavior it’s time to pull him in
I think so. I had overly strict parents and I did a lot I shouldn’t have and was pretty sneaky.
It ultimately depends on the kid. In my case, absolutely. In a friend’s case, not at all.
HAHAAHAHA YES!
OHH the stories I could tell you about my teenage years with a super reglious mom with horrible rules.
It was BAD.
Yes, it does. There’s a fine line between being too passive and too strict, so it’s definitely difficult. You don’t want to allow so much that they walk all over you, but you don’t want to stop them from doing things that are inevitable anyway. (They WILL date behind your back or find ways to sneak and see each other for example.) But you want your child to trust you and feel safe to tell you anything. If they feel they’ll always be yelled at or punished then they won’t ask you first or bother communicating with you how they feel. If your child feels safe to tell you anything, you are more likely to get through to them by chatting about your feelings and theirs about the situation. You both can express feelings and come to an agreement or understanding. You have to be a parent, but it helps being a friend too.
My parent were super strict and I was a rebel. I was sneaky with everything. I even hid my first pregnancy and I wasn’t even living at home!
I think it’s all subjective to the kid. Every kid responds to different parenting differently, it’s about finding what they respond to the best.
No. In all honesty its up to the kid. Because rules could be in place but they hide shit. Or you have no rules and they think they can do everything.
I would say yes and no I feel like it depends on the pathways of communication.
Open, honest communication is key. Tell them what you fear. That’s why we have these rules; b/c we’re afraid of the things that can go wrong w/o them. Talk to them about those things so that they can make educated decisions and have a say in said rules w/ well reasoned responses as to why they should or should not follow them. It’s worked for me and mine so far… (Middle school ages.) Through the years so far, we’ve compromised on some and kept others and seem to have an agreement that if a rule seems unfair to them, we can talk about it and decide together what suits their particular personalities as far as said rule goes.
Definitely. But you can still be strict, and have good open communication. I think that is key, and make yourself the safe place, to where your child feels comfortable with you and will tell you things.
Depends on the kid. Sometimes yes .Sometimes no.
I think you can be open and strict
I was a nightmare but my mum always knew where I was and what I was doing even if it wasn’t particularly good I intend to just be open and honest with my kids all you can realistically is advise them because they’ll no doubt do things regardless
Sometimes. My sister was way overly protective and now 2 kids with no future. Sad
It depends on the kid for sure. My oldest is not sneaky at all. He is very open with me and is a rule follower, now my youngest it wouldn’t matter how strict or not strict you were, he wouldn’t abide by a rule to save his life.
I think it depends on the kid, as well. My parents weren’t really around from age 14 on. I was a good kid by my choice, and always stayed out of trouble. Some of my friends, however, were a whole other story, and they had their parents.
Absolutely!! My parents were very strict and I did a lot of sneaky things that put me in some bad situations.
Think about what you hid back then, think about you finding your child doing what you hid back then… Now answer. Lol
Yes they do. My mother was abusive, narcissistic, and strict as all hell. She was awful as a child and always assumed I was just like her so the rules and limits on my life drive me crazy. I never did anything bad but she always assumed I did and I would be punished for it anyways. So I started hiding things from her. Relationships, friendships, ect. But I still didn’t sneak out or drink or drugs or any of that. I.just wanted her to know nothing of my. life because I was constantly in trouble for a everything. The less she knew the less I could get in trouble for basically. Strict parents make sneaky and depressed teens. There’s a difference though between rules and being horribly strict. But I feel like all of my childhood and teen years were ruined by her not letting me do a.single thing or go anywhere. It’s depressing thinking about all the things I missed out on with my friends because I wasn’t aloud to breathe without permission
My parents weren’t like super strict but i didn’t go do things I shouldnt have. I was a pretty good kid
I gave my daughters a lot of freedom, but if I found out they were doing stuff that would endanger themselves or others, it was time for them to spend every waking in school, or with me. I never believed in grounding them and walking away. If they were grounded, we both were. And I made it miserable enough that they never wanted to do that again. They are both fabulous adults, so I guess it worked
I don’t think so! My parents were very strict with me but I wasn’t doing anything I wasn’t allowed to. I was able to talk to my parents and they also shared their experiences enough for me to not do sneaky shit. At the end of the day I guess it’s just respect
My parents were strict about certain things. I never felt comfortable talking to them about things in life. Like when I started my period, the first time I had sex, when I first smoked or drank. They didn’t make me feel like I could go to them about those things because they were “sins” and I should never do them.
I have two boys and pregnant with a girl. I say all the time I want them to be open with me but know the boundaries in life. I never want to make my children feel ashamed because they did something wrong but have them learn from what they did. I openly talk to my 9 year old about things and he tells me everything. He’s hard headed and doesn’t think things through but he always learns from the mistakes he makes.
Fine line. Accept no shit but don’t over punish.
Coming from someone who has two polar opposite parents I can’t stress enough that it’s HOW you discipline.
I never felt comfortable talking to my dad about anything, even now, as an adult, he knows nothing about my life. I was a very good teenager, never got into trouble nor did anything I wasn’t suppose to. My dad would ground me for weeks over the smallest, most insignificant things, didn’t let me do anything normal kids get to do. Eventually it got to the point I wouldn’t even speak to him unless absolutely necessary. He acted as a dictator and not a father. He definitely projected his teenage experiences on me and just assumed I would do the same. He also didn’t respect the fact I was a human and had feelings different from his own.
I always respected my mom and asked for her permission before doing anything because she always showed me love and mutual respect. She knew everything about me/what I was doing. Not saying that she didn’t discipline me, because she definitely did! But she was compassionate, fair and always explained why she was punishing me and what I should do differently next time. Open communication about your expectations and fears from the beginning are so important!
It’s not necessarily “freedom vs strict” in our house. We always have an open line of communication. Im extremely honest about my past with my boys ages 16, 14, 13 and 10 (I lost my virginity at 14, got pregnant at 17, dropped out of school at 17, smoked weed, etc.) They know they can talk to me about anything and they do have alot of freedom ( home is their safe place, 16 year old newest thing is “what the hell?”) And I do not punish them for it. If they do something I think is inappropriate we talk. I think that’s one of the best things you can do.
Sometimes… I was very honest with my mom… so she trusted me more and I had more freedom the my friend that lied and snuck around
I think parents who don’t listen to kids create sneaky kids. Boundaries create security but they also need to be reasonable. Hurting your kids and/or humiliating your kids will just mean your kids don’t trust you and they’ll look for other people to trust
You have to find the happy in between!!! Obviously there are things you should be strict on and things you need to be more understanding or lenient on. My mom/stepdad tried to very strict on me and let my brothers do whatever whenever so I rebeled hard as a teen girl feeling stuck while everyone else had freedom. If your gonna set rules for 1 kids then make sure its the same for all of them if you have multiple unless 1 obviously does something to prove they dont deserve the same rules. Pregnant at 16 and having to drop out of school to take care of my kids waant exactly the route I wanted to take and I take full responsibility for my actions that I chose but at the same time i feel like i would have took a different route if I had the right guidance.
Iv a 13yr old son, we have a great relationship, always told him the truth regarding sex ed an relationship issues, kid friendly obviously…
Iv explained no means no, and not to be in a rush to grow up, when the time comes to always be save, dad has explained that young lads think porn is real sex they are paid adults to perform these acts, this is not intimacy. Always use contraception to avoid pregnancy and infections,
It’s all apart of life an nothing to be embarrassed about.
We can only do so much as parents, are children will make their own decisions…
Education an communication are the key we believe…
My parents were strict and I was sneaky af.
I always felt like I would get in trouble for everything so I never told them anything and we aren’t very close now.
I think it’s a balance. Strict but everything can be negotiated. I want me kid to have strong opinions and negotiate with me. I want her to be her own advocate but also respect our rules because she feels heard and seen
I was raised by very strict parents and I was very sneaky with everything. I’d suggest keeping the communication open as much as possible. Obviously don’t be too relaxed where your kid could be getting in risky situations but I think for the most part you should be able to trust your kid as long as you set those boundaries and are clear about what’s ok and not ok.
Depends upon the child. I don’t perceive myself as overly strict, but set riles and boundaries. I have 4 children, 2 of which are grown. Two of mine are really good children, 2 are sneaky af! But, all are good people even though some just have a stronger will.
I’m strict around the house but I do tell my daughter she needs to talk to me before making decisions. She’s 12 13 at the end of the year. I realized it’s not my life she’s living it’s her own. Yes there will be rule with have a partner over when she’s ready for that. There will obviously be no inappropriate stuff happening under my roof.
I don’t want to run her life, I want to guide her the best I can while she makes her decisions(age appropriate).
Yeah it made me not be honest about anything. I would lie about things that didn’t need to be lied about. And then once I moved out I did all the crazy stuff I wasn’t allowed to do.
My dad was like a friend, my mom ruled with an iron fist (well my stepdad did). I felt I couldn’t talk to my mom without getting punished or judged, but my dad was way too lenient and let me get away with whatever I wanted. I did tell my dad everything I never told my mom anything. But for my children, I’m raising them somewhat in the middle. Not too strict and not to lenient. I’m the parent not their friend but at the same time I’m not their ruler either. I never want my children to fear me. If something happens I want their first thought to be I need to call my mom
Personally, growing up with one really strict it definitely helped push me and my siblings to be sneaky. Like another commentator stated they had parents that were on opposite ends of the spectrum, same in my house growing up… And like her I try to be in the middle for my kids. I want them to trust me that they can talk to me and not have to hide things.
It definitely depends on the child, my parents raised me and my brother (2 year difference between us) very strict, no sleepovers no friends house only time we went out was with them, only parties we was allowed to go to was for family and they were right there, absolutely NO freedom, my brother was ok with it and it worked for him, me on the other hand cut school, runaway every chance I got, had lots of secret boyfriends never talked to them about anything even got locked up 2x as a juvenile, use your parental judgement to figure out what works for you and your kid
You gotta find the line that works for each kid.
I tore screens off to sneak out as a teen because I was grounded for every little thing. I’ve obviously mellowed out a ton but I was hell on wheels from about 13-18
I think yes. I had strict parents. N i was sneaking around. It was the only way, i could do the things, I wanted to do.
I was raised strict. I never snuck out but I snuck a lot of other things. As soon as I turned 18 I peaced out and did a lot of reckless things. I was homeless for awhile because I did NOT want to to back home. I hated it there. I drank ALL the time. I stole things. I skipped school. It definitely was because I was so sheltered.
I consider myself a strict parent. I have very open and honest communication with my kids. I feel like if anything they are more honest not less honest with me. Our house has rules and everyone abides by them. There are clear consequences and the kids weigh the pros and cons of breaking the rules. I’m open to discussions and amending the rules.
It is hard, but you just have to try and find a middle ground. Being overly strict is just as bad as spoiling a child rotten. Pay attention to them and always remember to communicate.
It’s all about the relationship. I had all the freedom and I still didnt tell anybody anything.
My parents were super strict and it caused me to rebel against them. I was sneaking out of the house and stuff. My dad was so strict I wasn’t allowed to go to proms or anything. No 8th grade dance. No senior trips. No homecoming games. Nothing! I will never be that strict on my kid. It made me be sneaky. Looking back, my parents ruined my high school years. I didn’t get to experience the fun parts of high school.
There has to be rules etc always but try not to go beyond what is reasonable. If it seems like it’s too much it probably is.
As an adolescent I hid things I honestly shouldn’t have felt the need to based on unecesaary strictness.
Bottom line you should have a pretty good idea of the level of strictness needed for you specific child. Different kids need different boundaries and rules. Adjust accordingly as needed
Ok, so I can somewhat relate to this, my mom was very very very strict with me! So I did do a lot of shady shit, but at the same time I didn’t… I was scared to death to get caught! But now I have a 14 ye old son, he’ll be 15 in august, I’m pretty open with him about what I expect. Him and I are super close and I always have to remind him he is still my baby! He doesn’t hide anything from me. There are things his father doesnt know that I do I have let him go stay the night with his gf, and tell him every time he goes “ don’t do dumb shit” and of course I probably wouldn’t know if he does , but we did provide the necessary items…
Now, I also have a 17 yr old sister, but I’ve raised her, ehhh I guess you could say half n half with my mom, and because her childhood with her father I’ve always been SUPER protective over her and very strict with her! And it’s only because I went out and got pregnant at 18 and I don’t want that for her! But it’s backfired, she currently has a bf, which I like him he’s a good kid, parents are , well I mean we’ve talked but nothing to boost about… anyways, when I started laying down rules for my sister and her bf, she then decided that she was going back to live with my mom and next month she is moving to New York with these people!! I’m beyond furious! I can’t even have talk about it without getting upset… anyways… I feel like because I was the tougher one, the one who had rules, and laid down the law and my mother wasn’t, was why she decided to leave…
Now I’ll explain why I’m harder on the 17 ye old more than the 14 almost 15 yrold. My sister is 17, physically, but mentally I’d put her at a 13 maybe 14 yr old… and not because she is “different “ because she is not, but her father fu**ed with her BAD! Mentally, physically and emotionally from infant to about 5 yrs old, so she has suppressed a lot! And that’s why I am the way I am with her…
I know this is a lot but hopefully it helps…
Yes, they do. My mom was super strict and I hid just about everything. Open with our son who is 18 now and he tells us almost everything.
My and my now husbands parents weren’t overly strict…
No sleeping over until I was 18 and at that time, I would normally sleep on the couch at his parents place anyways cause we would fall asleep watching a movie or whatever anyways… once we were dating for a couple years they didn’t say anything so we started sleeping in his bed. I was 19 and he was 21. No one ever said anything really and we were pretty good kids so I guess it depends on how kids generally are, their sense of entitlement, their personality…
I’m sure that if we had been into drinking underage, drugs or lying and whatnot they would have been harder on us and stuff but I think it’s a personal case by case type of thing…
I had strict parents and I mean honestly yes and no I mean I didn’t tell them when I had sex for the first time but I didn’t sneak out… then again I ran away and I don’t care for my parents but I still love them… in fact they live in Georgia and I moved all the way to Minnesota to get away from them… I’m not the best example
No…judgemental parents cause sneaky kids …keep open communication. But honestly there gonna need be teenagers too
I was raised in a strict military home and very strict stepmothers and I was very sneaky I did a lot of things I should not have done but I have raised two wonderful sons 21 22 years old and both I was pretty laying it with like a girls came over the door had to be open and my kids tell me everything
You can be strict without being overbearing and keeping them from having a life. I would have never snuck out of the house as a teenager if my dad would have let me do stuff occasionally. You aren’t going to stop them from having sex…so educate them. They will probably go to parties. Let them! But tell them if they drink to call you. The harsher and more restrictions you put on a teen the more they will just rebel. Be strict but also be the parent they come running to when they need help or advice. Not the one they hide stuff from.
Absolutely they do. The kids with the strictest parents always had the most scandalous stories lol
I personally will have rules and boundaries but I’m also going to be open. I want them to be able to fully tell me anything. If they snuck out to a party and got too drunk to get home? Call me. I just care about their safety.
I have an 18 year old daughter and a 13 year old son. I find it’s a balance. I’ve always let them dye their hair blue, pierce their nose (when legal), etc. but they also yes ma’am, no sir etc. to adults respect uniforms even moreso, be kind to others and especially animals, and know if they EVER come home having bullied, stolen, lied, etc. I’ll straight call the cops on them and they’ll have to send an extra for me. if they get into a fight because they are defending someone who can’t, I’ll take them for ice cream or dinner. It’s about pushing the things that matter that our society is seriously lacking. common decency, respect, work, and don’t be an a—hole. beyond that you do you boo, and go you!
Me and my brother wasn’t brought up with strict rules etc both of us have never been in bother with police never sneaked around etc, we both have kids of our own now and neither of us are strict parents my sons now a almost 15 year old he’s never smoked never drank or nothing and comes to me with everything whether it be about having a gf question regarding sex etc we have always had a good open relationship, we are best mates tbh, but if his attitude gets bit to much or whatever I just change my voice tone (not shouting) and he knows straight away to nip it in the bud I’m not happy, me personally I think if your to strict on kids they can rebel and will hide things cus they will be scared of how u react but there’s a difference between being a chilled parent and getting the piss taking out of you u just need to find the right balance for you and ur family what works for 1 may not work for the other
My mom was super super strict on me. Felt like I couldn’t breathe. Missed all kinds of things in high school. I swore when I had a child I would never parent that way. I had a son. We have a great relationship. I was open & honest with him about everything. I wanted him to hear the truth from me & not a lie from his friends. He had some freedom to go hang out with his friends. As he got older his curfew got longer. In the end he turned into an amazing young man. He’s 22 yrs old & I am so very proud of him!!