Kids are gonna cuss especially if they grew up hearing U do it. Your not wrong in how you parent even if your friend disagrees. That’s okay! As long as the child isn’t being disrespectful to U as in cussing at U then I really don’t see an issue. There just words used to express feelings in my opinion.
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I don’t. I feel like there are too many adjectives to describe feelings without needing to use bad language. I also think it’s disrespectful.
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I have heard my 13 cuss on his game or talking to his friends a few time and not thought it was a big deal because I was saying way worse in front of my mom at 13. But I do not let him cuss in front of me just to teach him to not always have a potty mouth, know his audience and respect me him only being 13 and the fact I haven’t gotten on to him the few time I have over herd it.
34 and my kids can cuss. I cuss, my parents cuss, and we think they’re just words. I don’t believe any words are bad. I think a bunch of old white men decided to name words as bad and then proceeded to force it on everyone. 
. That being said, my almost 15 and 12 year old kids don’t cuss at school, not in front of their elders, and not in front of younger children or children that are religious/etc. Out of respect for others.
This is my opinion and doesn’t have to be yours! 
.
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It’s all about your comfort level. My parents taught me to be respectful and to them that included not cussing around them or other adults. But for me, I feel like words are just used to express feelings and cuss words are just words that only have the power we give them. Also, I don’t want them cussing AT me, yk.
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Don’t have a choice 
I have the role in my house and had the entire time my son was growing up that he could say anything to me now he could not curse at me call me names but if he was frustrated with the situation he was allowed to vent to me so that he could get all of his raw emotions out it would be better able to verbalize belies how he was feeling when he talked the issue out with his friends or family members
But to be allowed to curse at home during normal conversation I would find that disrespectful and would not tolerate it
Yes. If they think they are old enough to ise the words… than let them… but set boundaries.
For example… if you direct it at someone you loose the privilege.
You can say FUCK
But if you say FUCK YOU it’s disrespectful and you won’t be able to use those words.
It’s just a way of expressing them selves and it’s not like they won’t when they get older
i’m the same as you. my son will be allowed to swear at home as that is a safe space. kids just need to be taught the context in which to say these things. if my son runs into a wall and says “fuck that hurt” i don’t care. if he swears at people then he will be told off. they are infact just words.
Fuck no! I swear around my kid and I’m surprised he hasn’t said fuck yet 
My boys are 16 and 17 and yes I do allow it to a point. They are going to anyways. But they also need to respect others who don’t wanna hear them swear and not do it around those ppl.
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I never made a big deal about swear words and my oldest is 7 now and they’ve lost their luster for her already. I feel like it’s only a big deal if you make it a big deal. A kid that wants to cuss is just going to make sure it’s behind their parents back
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Yes, though it only slips out occasionally. Their mama never had an empty swear jar. 
I let mine starting at 16 (17-18-22 now) but they can’t cuss me or each other. And no F💣 or GD. Other than that no they can’t do it infront of others or if we have company etc.
I swear
But my son whose 13 wouldn’t be aloud to swear around me at this age. Not that he does not around me anyway. That’s just how I see it.
Your house…your choice 
I let my kids say the “lighter” curses… they are not allowed to use them to say derogatory or hurtful things to myself or their sisters, and they are not to say them outside of this home. Home is a safe place for them to express themselves, and as I typically sound like a well seasoned sailor suffering from hemorrhoids, I allow them to use certain “sentences enhancers.” My girls are 15, 13, and 11
I Think it sounds trashy. But to each their own
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My daughter 13 wont even say swear words when she tells me so and so called me this or that in school today, she wont say the words she spells them out to me. Ive never heard her swear once, i think i would be gob smacked if she did 
each to their own. No one can tell you how to parent
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I swear, I don’t see anything wrong with swearing at home. I know situations I can’t like work school ect. I don’t let my boy who’s nearly 11 but I know a lot of kids his age do. I’m not a judgy person everyone parents different, and I’m sure he does when he thinks we aren’t listening. I won’t have an issue with it when he’s older but as others have said not at me or his dad and he will need to be old enough to understand when is and isn’t the right place. Neither of you are wrong or bad parents 
xx
I don’t make a big deal out of but if he doesn’t do it around other adults why do it around you?
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Well im a real bad parent bc my kids 5/6 swear. I always said if it’s used in proper context, if I have said those words then who am I to get angry. I have told them never use them outside of this house and to try and refrain from using them constantly. I started offering up alternatives to “said” words but never stuck. 
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I guess I’m a little confused on WTF is wrong with everyone. You are setting your children up to not speak with any kind of restraint. People will not see this as you do. Why set them up for unkind people to only hear their voices curse and take a chance on being disrespectful out in the world. I taught my children to pit a sentence and conversation together without four letter curse words. What they did when they were gone was their business. Both if my older sons are on the radio. Their language skills don’t need the f bomb to express themselves. It’s selfish. I’m sorry our children have one chance in this world give them a good shot. Seems petty. I’m sorry
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Neither of you are “right” because there is no right or wrong way to raise your child. Everyone has different opinions and if she doesn’t like it that’s her opinion/right but guess what, not her kid not her business. 
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As long as they were not swearing directly at me it didn’t bother me.
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No judgment cast here. However, I hardly ever cuss nor do I want to hear my 14 or 11 year old to cuss. More than anything to me, it’s a sign of respect. Not to mention I think it sounds trashy hearing a child cuss. I believe it’s my job as a parent to set boundaries no matter how big or small. I’m a teacher so I’m just not in a habit of using those words. I feel if I set that tone for my kids, they may not feel the need either. I have dear friends who drop the f bomb a lot so this is just my opinion.
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Yep I sure do! I don’t care for anyones opinion on it, I swear soooo….
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Bigger battles to fight than this. It depends on the nature of too, no hostilility. Frankly i cant live without humor. Sometimes cuss words are kinda funny too. I feel like either answer could be ok kids/families are diff
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I never made cussing a big deal and my kids know it can be offensive to others. They do it at home but have never done it in public or at school or to one another.
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I let my kids swear. They’re just words like any other words. They’re taught respect though. Calling someone any name whether a “bad word” or not is disrespectful. Saying F*** when frustrated is not disrespectful IMO
With my oldest I was big on not swearing around him & not allowing him to swear. Once he became a preteen swearing became a huge thing. It was every other word from his mouth. I loosened up since then. I’ve found that when allowed to swear, those words treated as any other they don’t really say them often. I have 1 out of 3 that will swear in public because it gets a reaction. Then it’s funny when grannies get their panties in ruffle & are told by me to mind their own business.
I don’t mind if it’s in ‘appropriate’ context so to speak. They’re just very expressive words. Sometimes the only word you can find for something is shit or an f bomb. My daughter drops stuff and says oh shit, I just let her crack on with it. The more you get on them for cussing the more they’ll do it just to show you they can.
No way ! Never would I allow my 9 year old to cuss until they are out my house and own thier own! My opinion!
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When my kids are that age ill let them swear. First of ur house ur rules
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Everyone has different opinions and what they think is right or not right. I hv a friend who cusses in front of her little kids all the time and personally I don’t think its ok but those are her kids not mine. I hv little kids too and I do not cuss around them at all, a bad word might slip out every once in awhile but thats rare. I know she loves her kids snd would do anything for them. Do we parent different yes, but that doesn’t mean I am right or she is. It’s ok to not agree on parenting styles, if the kids are getting hurt in any way bc of her parenting that would be different. Let her parent how she parents you do same. But you hv to respect eachother. If she doesn’t cuss around her kids then you need to respect that amd you don’t cuss around them etc and vice versa.
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I’m 26 . And I don’t swear , smoke or drink around my parents. And I have 2 kids… age 2 and 6.
I swear like crazy every word imaginable.
But all in my head of coz. I swore infront of my daughter . I said oh shit and she said oh shit too and that’s where I realized these kids are like sponges and they absorb everything and just like when you squeeze a sponge whatever it absorbed comes out… when your child is under enough pressure those swear words will come out… becareful what you allow… there are better ways to express dissatisfaction…
We swear so its natural that my toddler picked up oh sh!t. I have so many battles with a toddler and a newborn. She also doesn’t go to daycare so… they have done studies that swearing actually reduces pain that why we do it when we stub toes. Also they have done studies that people who swear have higher iq’s.
She is.
Growing up it was a respect thing for my mom
I wasn’t even aloud to say Damn
It’s like anything else with parenting
Teach your kids when and where appropriate and be respectful.
My family is pretty sassy but we knows when and where and we have to teach the kids . Not cussing as much but teasing .
Some people feel the kids are disrespectful believe me they will be told when they carry to far .
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My kid is 11 and she’s allowed to use whatever language needed when venting. So if she needs to say “they were being asshats at recess” that’s fine. She can’t be like “f you B” at anyone, but she can use colorful language if she feels the need.
She rarely does tho
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My 16 year old wouldnt dream of swearing in front of me.
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No this is not bad parenting.
Who decided that a “bad” word is bad 
. My son knows he’s allowed to say them only if he’s in my presence and often chooses not to. It’s not so much as “hey I’m letting my kid swear and say whatever he wants” but more of "I’m not going to freak out if he drops an f bomb because it’s really not that serious " So if me choosing not to chastise my child for occasionally saying a “bad” word makes me a bad parent then I guess I’ll be waiting for my award in the mail.
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Neither and both. Each person will have their own way of doing things. But just because you do it differently, doesn’t make you a bad parent. There is no black and white.
My kids are 5 and 9 and they don’t cuss. But some of their friends do and those friends are still good kids…
You may just need a friend who is less judgemental.
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I don’t think anyone here is wrong. It just different parenting styles. My belief aligns with yours exactly when it comes to language and my 14 year old. there are worse things my teenager could be involved in than what she does. I allow freedom of expression in any form as a way to curb the rebellion appeal. Who cares if she’s got blue hair and has a sailor mouth. At least she’s always at home (by choice) and doesn’t do drugs
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It’ll be fine lol
Yep, sure do. My mom let me start cursing around 13 too. My 13 year old is respectful about it though. She doesn’t curse at the adults or her younger siblings, but, she does curse like a sailor while on discord with her friends. Which is totally fine. I figure, the less that’s taboo, the less she’s going to do behind my back.
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That’s the one of the many first steps towards disrespect. He will be cussing at u in about a year!!!
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No. If they slip up somewhere you will look like a bad parent. They slip up at school and they’ll be in trouble. They slip up in front of another child’s parent, guess who won’t be playing w them? So no I would not recommend letting your child cuss.
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My 14 y/o old asked me if he could and we had a conversation about using any cuss word must be in the right context n he’s been really good with it. I’m with you on this, they are just words but need to be used appropriately n not offensively. He is also very careful with not cussing around his younger sister and other adults that may be taken aback by it.
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My 16 year old has be never swore around me even when I give him permission to do it. Each to there own but at that age I wouldn’t want him saying those kids of words but someone being an arse or like that then I’d be ok with. I’d rather him have some respect for me and other adults around him. When he’s an adult he can say what he wants. I never did it in front of my mum till I was 18 around my friends yes all the time but I had more respect for my mum.
I allow my kids to cuss. They’re just words. As long as they aren’t using their words to hurt other people, than I don’t care. I swear all the time. How am I going to tell them not to swear, when their dad and I do it? They’re just words, they’re only bad if you make them that way. Mine know when it’s appropriate to use them, and when not.
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Nip it in the bud now. He should have a high respect level for you.
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My 19 yo twins started chasing around us at about 16. My 13 yo now does… As long as it’s not directed at any of us, no, I don’t mind. He’s a great kid, does great in school, helps out around the house without being asked… There are worse things kids could do than to use “bad words”. They get frustrated too. Their little sister is 7, she is not allowed to curse.
It’s about respect. If he’s cussing around adults at 13, he will eventually get use to talking like that around everyone… children, women, and old ladies. You need to teach your child that this language isn’t for everyone… even if you don’t see it as a problem. People will not have respect for him and he will have a hard time having a successful job if he doesn’t understand the difference in profanity and everyday language.
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So your teaching him to be as foul mouth as you are.
SMH
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My kids are 15 ,17 and 18 and they have cussed since they were 15 there is not a big deal about it people have a problem with it but when they pay my bills they can train my kids
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They are just words. Definitely not bad parenting.
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You are both “right” she can do what she feels is right for her child and you can decide for your child. There are way more important things to focus on than words. Sounds like your child knows the time and place for it, which is important. My son (15) swears. He doesn’t do it in all social settings tho.
If your friend doesn’t like hearing certain words she could tell your son. Politely. But judging you is wrong on her part.
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Ain’t nobody’s business to tell you what is okay in your house or not. No matter what you do as a parent someone is going to disagree and immediately label you a bad parent.
Your friend can parent her kiddo how they want, you parent yours.
They’re just words. As long as they’re not using them to be hurtful and YOU don’t find it disrespectful, then that’s that. No need to dive into asking strangers on the internet their nasty opinions 
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I’m 35 and do not curse around my mom. Its more of a respect factor.
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My mother would give my brothers and I the look of death if we cursed until we were in our 20’s. I’ll be doing the same with my kids I do not like it.
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Oh no please hate those words
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And this is what’s wrong with our children today. The parents are not teaching them to be respectful. It all starts at home. People want to blame the children but I blame the parent for not teaching the the respect.
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They will use them either way
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I personally don’t like it, as a rule I don’t allow our 15 year old to swear in front of me, or within earshot (I know he will away from me).
It’s 100% personal choice though, I was brought up not being allowed to do guess I’m following my parents parenting.
If he ever does slip up, I certainly don’t berate him or anything, merely raise an eyebrow which usually gets a cheeky grin flashed back at me from him.
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It’s disrespectful and a bad habit that is hard to break. It isn’t acceptable to use that language anywhere you go and in my opinion shows a lack of intelligence in being able to find a better way to express yourself. Have some self respect. Be ing a Gentleman or a lady should be a good thing.
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They aren’t ‘just words’ when he’s sitting in detention for dropping the F-bomb at his teacher. It’s about respect.
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If he is allowed to do it at home he may accidentally do it at school. Yes they will do it anyway but they need to know where it is not acceptable. When they are an adult they can choose where to say it. My husband slips up sometimes and says them around his Aunt. I fuss at him about it. If he says it with my dad I don’t care they both do it but he needs to respect the ladies in his life. Teach him manners around women and mom you are a lady.
I was raised in my dads garage and I have heard every swear word there is from a young age. I was taught, Time and place. You don’t use your garage mouth when out in public. Then as a teen you hear it all again in school. It’s a part of society now. If you think your kid doesn’t curse, you’re fooling yourself. Just teach them, Time and place and don’t make a big deal out of it.
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In my opinion, you are definitely right! I’m in the same boat lol my kids curse in front of me and their friends are shocked! BUT their friends curse ALOT just behind their parents back where as my kids will gladly say it in front of me. My kids tell me everything, they don’t feel the need to hide it. So you tell that mother that her kids curse nonstop because they think its cool…the more its restricted, the more they will use it! Just yesterday my son’s friend and him were playing fortnite together and his friend private messaged him saying dont say any curse words my mom is near me. My son laughed and told me. I always get that I’m not raising them properly yet my kids will tell me exactly what happens with them and their friends…but you won’t win their opinion over…it is what it is…
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I was raised by a sailor, therefore I swear like a sailor. My kids know that they are grown up words, not appropriate for kids, and that’s that. He also knows that we don’t use our words to hurt people, so I think when he gets older he’ll be okay.
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This is just my opinion and my opinion only! Back in my day my momma would of washed my mouth out with soap (it only took one time believe me) my momma taught me curse words were for adults and that it what I taught my children they are all grown now with kids of there own. They all have respect for anyone who don’t cuss and they don’t use bad language around them, they also teach there children the same. Alot of us will drop a bad word when we get upset but the F bomb is a horrible word and If my child back then or my grandchildren now would use that word I would be the first one to bust that butt!
A 13 year old cussing around you?, next it will be cussing you, then God forbid that child starts laying hands on you. It’s called discipline, might want to insert some. Now you need to break the pattern you yourself set. You want to be your kids bestie/buddie, wait until you get them raised. My grown kids know better even now. What you instill is what you get.
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I cuss like a sailor. to me anyway, there is a time and a place for cussing. We don’t make a huge deal out of it.
Nah. They’re just words. The only bad words are the ones you say to hurt ppl.
I let my Kida swear, it’s all about time and place. Learning to read a room.
So I have 11, 12, & 13 year old boys. I know they cuss around friends or on the phone and when I’m not around. Okay, whatever. If something happens and a cuss word slips… (like you stub your toe and go SHIT!) whatever… but if we are just sitting around having a conversation together… I don’t wanna hear it. I tell mine: Time and Place dude!!! And they respect it. To each their own. I personally don’t find it “bad” unless it’s used disrespectfully toward adults or authority figures.
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My teens cuss as well. In our house they are words. We took the stigma away from them. They only have power if you allow them to. When I was their age I would cuss because I could at school. My children are still very respectful and intelligent beings and no harm has been done to their brains because I have allowed them to drop the F-bomb.
My kids are open books. They aren’t secretive they come home and tell us about their days. They have friends that aren’t allowed to cuss and yet they cuss more then my kids do.
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Oh boy. They are just words… I was allowed to cuss a little bit around my parents and I still understood not to use that language with my teachers or other adults, and not to use it in a derogatory manner towards anyone. But if you stub your toe you should be able to shout an obscenity without being punished lol, if it’s in the comfort of your own home and they are being respectful towards everyone else, I don’t see a problem with it… And to those saying it makes you sound uneducated, studies have shown that people who cuss are actually more intelligent look it up
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If you set the expectation that it’s ok then they will with anyone. It’s all about teaching expectations and proper etiquette and respect for others.
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To the people who say cussing can lead to your child putting their hands on you so you need to discipline your child … cussing does not equate to domestic violence and that is the most insane thought I have ever heard. My children are free to say whatever they want in my home because it’s their safe space. So if they wanna say fuck under their breath during homework so be it. With that, to piggy back off of what someone else is saying, time and place is what we teach them. They know not to go around cussing in other peoples homes or in school. Because despite me allowing my children to say shit and damn, I also teach them what respect is. There’s no need to discipline over some simple words thats everyone under the sun uses. Its so entirely laughable that people are questioning this person’s character and ability to parent over SWEARING.
He definitely does do it around other kids. It’s your choice but I wouldn’t want that influence for my children. I didn’t curse in front of my parents until I was 21 though.
You’re the parent is the bottom line here
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Growing up I was taught we couldn’t say them ever. It made me want to swear and I would when not around my mom. So I allow my kids to swear. Like others said they’re just words
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Not infront of me but I did find an email my 13 yo sent out that contained cuss words it. It was directed at anyone and was used in the correct way. I just let her know that I could see her emails. Now my 6 yo was telling me a story one time and was really scared of whatever it was bc the was he described it was " MOM. I WAS SO 1FUCKING SCARED!" You knew the moment he knew he screwed up the look on his face was priceless. I laughed so hard. Explained to him that we don’t use those words and that only adults use those words. And me and my husband laughed all night over it.
I dont and my parents didnt either. I find it very disrespectful
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You don’t want him to cuss regularly because he’s gonna think it’s normal behavior when around other adults.
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Ur both right. Raise your child however u please. My Mom always let us cuss but we weren’t allowed to say the f bomb or gd in her presence. As long as he knows when it’s acceptable to use them and when it’s not, i don’t see an issue.
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I don’t think anyone is right nor wrong. Everyone has their own parenting style. That doesn’t make you wrong.
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I am 49 ,and my dad still yells at me for cussing,lol!
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My son is 13. I allow it, as long as it’s not the f-bomb and as long as it’s not directed at anyone. He says things like “what the hell”, “this is bullshit” stuff like that… and usually only when playing his video games when he’s frustrated.
You’re not wrong for allowing your child to cuss and she’s not wrong for not allowing her son to cuss. The only thing she is wrong for is telling you how to parent your child. That’s none of her business.
On a side note, her son probably cusses also, just not in front of her. That’s how I found out that my son was cussing. I overheard him on his headset with some of his friends. When I first gave my son permission, he would drop a cuss word in every sentence, simply because it was a new thing. Now, he uses appropriate context.
When my kids turned 13 I let them have a word each year for a birthday present. Conditions were you don’t use them directed at people. It was great! It showed trust and responsibility. Each year the words got progressively worse until at 17 they got the big one.
They never used them at anyone and hardly even around me.
I do remember when my youngest let the big one fly before her time. But the situation called for it, so I gave her a pass and we laughed.
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They’re literally words the stigma around them is so outdated too lol bottom line is your the parent
Alll the moms like “I wOuLdNt WaNt My KiDs ArOuNd HiM” LMAOO 
all the cuss word kids are welcome here!!
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We do not cuss, so my children are not allowed to. Its disrespectful. Now, when they’re 18 and move out, they’re free to say whatever whenever to whomever all but not until them
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Respect for others. It doesn’t sound right coming out of any adults mouths,either.
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No one is going to be right. You guys arent parenting the same kid. What one kid is responsible enough to handle another may be not.
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So I guess I’m the minority. My kids have freedom of expression within the household. They can say whatever swear they want, as long as it’s not directed at each other. I can count on one hand the amount of times they have chosen to swear. My parents were strict and hated it, so naturally, I swear like a trucker every day of my life. I thought that maybe the opposite would work for my kids, and it has. Its definitely not an approach for everyone, but making it the norm has made it seem less cool, and they choose not to.
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Nope. It’s personal choice. Do they say it? I’m sure they do, but as far as in front of us (parents/grandparents) NO. I think it’s more about respect & setting standards.
Everyone has a right to parent their way. So you should be allowed to let him cuss and her not let hers. Every family is different. I allow my teenager to cuss. To me it’s no big deal. Of course she has to know boundaries she know who and where it’s ok to cuss in front of
I’ve started letting my girls cuss as long as it’s not directed towards any adult or whatever. I figured since the school decided jackass was a cuss word and they were told they couldn’t use it to call the kids who calling them even worse things they might as well follow the crowd since the other kids weren’t getting in trouble for calling my girls the b word and we’ll acting like jackasses